"Um, Ayanokouji-kun, can I ask you something?"
A girl with upper-back length brown hair approached me and asked me a question. If I remembered her correctly, which with my eidetic memory means that I did, her name was Satou Maya. I guess after my perfect performance in the swimming pool, I have attracted lots of attention. However, her question may be totally unrelated so I decided to answer her.
"Sure. What is it?"
"Um, well, you were really cool in that swimming pool, so I wondered if I could have your contact information?"
Oh, so she was on of those really thirsty bitches in our class, or what Matsuo likes to call them, a gold digger. In this case however, she doesn't want my money, she wants my body. I wondered if she was secretly an elementary student, as those are the only types of people who would form a crush on someone if they ran really fast or some other athletic feat.
"Well, thanks, but no. I suppose you're going to ask Koenji as well?"
"Oh, no, Koenji is was too narcissistic and is way too overbearing, but you're quite easy to approach."
She was basically saying that she thinks that Koenji would give her a hard time, while I would probably give her my contact information. While it would be helpful to build up more control within my class, there's still the risk of her having an ulterior motive, even if I don't sense any. I also didn't want to build the image that I was a pushover, so giving her my contact information would set a bad precedent.
"Mmm, well I don't really know you and I don't feel like knowing you so yeah, no."
I rejected in a slightly harsh way to make sure that she would stop bitching around me, and it looked like it worked. She was looking down at the ground, ashamed of herself. Wait, was that shame? Don't tell me she's blushi-
"Well, that's too bad. I'll just ask you next time then!" She waved at me and then left swiftly.
Fuck.
━┳━ ━┳━
Today was another day at judo club with the boys. At least, that's what we started calling ourselves. The boys referring to the members of the judo club. However, today was a special day for one of our members.
"Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday to John Lee,
happy birthday to you!"
"Woooo! Less gooooo!" John shouted.
Today was April 10, which happened to be John's birthday. This was my first time celebrating someone's birthday, and the first time I gave anyone a present. It was a pleasant, new experience, one which didn't betray my expectations. The boys were quite lively and excited, making an atmosphere befitting that of a celebration.
"Yooo, this cake is so huge, just like your mo-"
"No." Harambe cut him off before John could make another 'your mom' joke. Although it was getting slightly repetitive, I couldn't say that I didn't enjoy this inside joke that we have going on.
"Dude we spent so many points on this cake, with your favorite blueberry flavor as well! Don't ruin it with a 'your mom' joke!" Kazuma exclaimed.
Yep. The birthday present I gave John was a birthday cake, which costed an exorbitant 10000 points. Me, Kazuma and Harambe decided to give one gift together, so we chose an expensive one. While we were looking around, we found a large cake that was enough for four people, so we paid for it together and decided to eat it with John today during club time.
The thing about clubs is that nobody actually checks what we are doing, unless we request items from the student council. They don't have an unlimited budget after all, so they couldn't just easily give clubs whatever they wanted. Usually we don't request any items though, so we could celebrate John's birthday in peace.
We started eating the cake while bantering about the most trivial things. We talked about how Kazuma broke his ankle while trying to avoid Ryueen; how John tried to pick up some girls but no one fell for his charm; how Harambe was spreading his passion for exercising and judo around the school; how I won the swimming tournament in my class
Eventually we settled down and finished the large, round, and fluffy blueberry cake. John decided to do something else since Kazuma had a broken ankle.
"Yo everyone, let's play cards shall we? I brought my UNO cards, which are a special limited angry birds edition," John proposed.
Like the name implied, it was a card game where you had to lose as many as your cards as fast as possible. While it relied a lot on luck, it also required a certain amount of skill if you wanted to win, kind of like poker. However, I didn't know whatever this "special limited angry birds edition" meant.
"There's different editions of UNO? Is there like some weird rule where each card has their own special ability based on whichever angry bird you get?" Kazuma joked.
"No, it's just that the card faces look different, nothing else," replied John. "Although that would be pretty cool though."
"Hah! A nice game of UNO does sound nice, although I think with Ayanokouji's poker face it will be hard to win against him," Harambe remarked.
"I'm just bad at expressing myself."
"Yeah yeah, we get it, let's just start playing already!" Looks like Kazuma was real excited.
John took out his cards and started shuffling them. Since we were in the judo room, the four of us were sitting on the judo mats criss cross apple sauce across from each other, with the shuffled deck of cards sitting in the middle. He proceeded to hand the cards out to each of us, and all of us ended up with seven cards each.
I looked at my cards and ended up with an average deck. Observing my club mates' expressions, I could probably discern how good their cards were. Depending on this observation, I could play offensively or go for the defensive.
I saw Kazuma's face flash in joy for a split second before falling back to the best poker face he could make. He probably had a +4 card or a bunch of special cards. I would have to be careful of him.
Harambe just always looked excited so I couldn't tell if his cards were good or not.
John had a good poker face, so it was hard for me to read him. However, nobody has a poker body (except yours truly), so it wasn't hard for me to find that he has either mediocre or terrible cards. His body language showed his nervousness and he looked reserved, meaning that he was going to be playing on the defensive.
This means that currently, Harambe is the most dangerous opponent has I have no idea how he was going to play. With his attitude though, he wasn't going to try-hard this game of UNO, which gives me a higher chance of success even with my average cards.
"Aw shucks, my hand sucks!" Sorry Kazuma, but your bluff wasn't going to work on me.
"Yeah same dude, they suck," John said. I can't tell if he gave up or if it was a double bluff. Maybe I was reading way too much into a friendly game of UNO, but my UNO win streak of 333 would end if I lost here.
The order we were going in was clockwise with Harambe starting first, and since he was opposite me I would be going third. John on my right was going second while Kazuma was fourth.
The first card was a yellow seven, and immediately Harambe played a yellow +2 card. John just sighed and took two cards from the deck, making it my turn.
I had a green +2 card that I could play right here, also my only plus card. However, Kazuma most likely had a plus card, and the other two players might have one as well, so I played it safe and played a yellow 4.
Kazuma just smirked at me and put down the +4 card he had. I hadn't expected him to be this bold, but that was Kazuma for you.
"I change the color to blue!" he shouted. That was neither good nor bad for me, but it seemed to be slightly favorable for John.
Harambe put down a +2 card, turning the huge amount of possible cards to John.
John laughed and also put down a +2 card, before I put another plus card as well.
"Heh, I knew this would happen, so that's why I saved another plus card!" Kazuma shouted.
Dude, you only played one card and it was a +4, stop acting like you just implemented some genius strategy. He placed a blue +2 card onto the placed cards and turned to Harambe.
Harambe just laughed and picked up a whole 12 cards from the deck, bringing his total deck to 18 cards. There was almost no possible way for Harambe to win now; all he could do was try to sabotage us, and in the current rotation the one that would suffer the most would be John. Even if the order reverses, Harambe would pose no danger to me.
John grinned and played an UNO reverse card, most likely to stop my turn from happening and turning Harambe's ire from him to Kazuma. Kazuma would also attack me, so John killed three birds with one stone. However, this actually helped me because Kazuma would be gradually weakened and sucked his cock,
"aUH! So goofy！Let's have sex!" They got aids and died. The only cure for that was to bite off each others' glans! (A/N my friends messed with my computer but I also don't want to delete it XD)
However, this actually helped me because Kazuma would be gradually weakened by Harambe, meaning he wouldn't be able to do too much damage to me, especially since he already used two of his plus cards. I also got to attack the weak John, meaning that his plan didn't impact me too negatively.
As expected, Harambe attacked Kazuma with a +2 card. Whether Kazuma had another plus card would be up to luck, but he had to be insanely lucky for that.
"Hihihi, time to die Kiyotaka!" Kazuma sounded a bit like my past white room instructor, but since it was Kazuma I almost wanted to laugh. He placed a +2 card, resulting in me gaining another 4 cards, bringing my total amount of cards to 9.
The 4 cards I got were all blue, and all of them were special cards as well. Lucky me. I won't hold back just because it's your birthday, John.
━┳━ ━┳━
We played UNO until the end of club time, with me netting all the wins, bringing my win streak to 337. If I was nice I would've let John win at least once since it was his birthday, but this fic is called Savagekouji so too bad.
"Hahaha! That card game was quite fun! As expected of Ayanokouji, winning everything with seemingly no effort! Is there anything you're even bad at?" Harambe inquired.
"Um, well I'm bad at expre-"
"Dude, just stop. You don't have to say that every thirty minutes," Lozuma (lose-zoo-ma) reprimanded me.
"Yeah like come on, you could've let the birthday boi win at least once," John pouted, which looked very cursed.
"I've said it in my swimming tournament and I'll say it here, sounds like a skill issue. Just git gud," I replied.
"Bruh okay."
With club over and the rest of the day left to celebrate John's birthday, we all went to the karaoke room in Keyaki mall. This was the first time we all have ever went to karaoke, except John, who was apparently some sort of singing veteran.
We arrived at the room and ordered some oreos and orange juice. I ordered some green tea, which earned me some curious looks.
"Alright guys, I heard you just sing in karaoke, so why don't you go Kiyotaka!" Kazuma enthusiastically persuaded me.
"Nah I'm good," I responded. I really didn't want to just talk my way through an entire song for three minutes.
"Come on Ayanokouji, I want to see you sing too!" John exclaimed. He kept abusing his birthday privileges, which I made a mental note to do as well on my own birthday. If they were still around to celebrate it, that is.
"Don't be scared Ayanokouji! None of us would judge you," laughed Harambe.
Sigh. I shrugged my shoulders and started to sing one of the songs available:
Never Gonna Give You Up By Rick Astley.
"..."
"This was a mistake," John muttered.
"Did I just get rick rolled in a monotone voice? I guess there's a first for everything," Kazuma said.
"Don't worry Ayanokouji! Just like exercising, the more you sing, the better you get at it!" encouraged Harambe.
"I don't plan on being a singer though,"
I replied. We made some more small talk, finished up our snacks and drinks, and ended the day by going back to the dorms. I said goodbye to the boys and went back to my room.
"Friends are pretty amazing, huh." I learned more about my judo classmates far more than I originally intended to, but this was pretty fun. I wonder how much longer before peaceful life-chan leaves me?
A/N
2248 words
Fuck mosquitoes. They're the absolute worst.
Also SoL chapter cuz I'm bad at advancing the plot. Was there foreshadowing in this chapter. Who knows? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Next update will hopefully be before the weekend, also it's much harder to write after school dumps so much knowledge and shit on you so the quality of this chapter might be a bit worse than usual.
I hoped you enjoyed this useless filler chapter. See you next time!