A/N: Okay, so I know I said that there will not be many Authors Notes but I felt that I had to put a disclosure here.
So just be warned with this chapter. ALOT of it is basically scene by scene taken from Supernatural , beginning of Season 7. I kind of hated doing this, but I figured I had to finally place my story into a time frame. So yeah, a lot of the story line in this chapter I do not own, and belongs to the writers/producers of the TV series Supernatural.
Now another few warnings, I kind of want to hurry this timeline along so there may be a few chapters when you'll hear nothing of Sam and Dean and then I'll do a chapter like this one.
I am, however, planning on a reunion soon, a slow one...
Let me know what you think. Also this chapter changes point of view a lot so let me know if it gets too confusing and I'll try and fix it and, uh, I didn't really get time to edit properly, so yeah, let me know.
Thanks
-Ducky :)
#19 - The Means to an End
You took the stairs two at a time as you sprinted towards Bellamy's apartment. Your heart was beating so fast you thought that it might just leap out of your chest. You neared the door and fumbled through your pockets for your key. There was no sign of forced entry, so that was one thing. Once your key clicked the door open you practically fell through the opening.
"Bellamy?" you called out "Bell? Where are you?" you stumbled through the building in a panic until you reached the kitchen counter. Your heart finally settled in your chest as you realised that Crowley's threats were as empty as what he had left with that night. A note lay on the counter with Bellamy's messy handwriting scrawled over it. You picked it up and settled upon one of the tall bar stools at the black marble counter. So it appeared that he had just left to visit his sister. It said not to wait up as he'd be home late.
You stared at the note a moment longer, a smudged fingerprint from your bloodied hand lingered on the edge of the paper, holding on in a tight embrace. You glanced at your red hands before screwing the note up and placing it in your pocket. You headed for the bathroom, stripping your clothing before climbing into a warm stream of water. You scrubbed at your hands, tainting the water that ran down the plughole. You ran your hands over your arms next, cringing as you pressed a dark bruise on the upper part. Demons.
Once you were done you climbed out once more, wrapping a dark towel around your body. You stared down at your clothes for a moment before scooping them off of the floor. You walked over to the trash can, digging the note from your pocket and burying it in the bottom of the trash. Finally, you reached the washing machine, where you threw your clothes inside the drum. You set it on high and threw in an unnecessary amount of detergent before starting it up.
For a long time you just stood and watched the washing through the glass window spinning round. You eventually found your way over to the couch, falling into the soft fabric. You looked to the place where you had buried the angel blade, deep in the cushions. The irony of how afraid you were to be without it tonight. How you had kept it safe, kept it hidden until you need it again. The truth - you wouldn't need it again.
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"Are you sure you're making the right decision, boy?"
Dean glanced at Bobby through the door of the wrecked Impala with a sigh. He slipped from his position where he pressed his feet forcefully to the roof of the car, and climbed out of the door-less frame to join the older man. Did he not think that Dean did not want to just drop everything and go running to find her?
"I've got too much to focus on right now Bobby" Dean sighed as he ran his hands through his hair.
"You boys have done enough, you killed Eve" Bobby stated gruffly.
"And now we've got a Dick Angel trying to play God on our hands," Dean asserted.
"I'm just saying," Bobby started "Maybe you could take some time off to look for her."
"Look for her?" Dean started, his anger getting the best of him, beginning to surge round his body. "If she was here none of this would have happened. Cas leaving to fight in heaven, working with Crowley. Sam's head is broken into pieces. For all we know, Gabriel could be dead, so excuse me if my main priority isn't looking up and down the country for someone who doesn't really want to be here. I'll tell you what I'm going to focus on Bobby. I'm gonna focus on fixing this car and then I'm gonna fix Sam, I owe him that much."
Bobby sighed in defeat. He could only watch in silence as Dean stormed from the room. In his mind he knew that Dean was right. Sam had to be the first priority. He did not deny that. Though something inside him nagged away, if they could just bring you back here, maybe, just maybe they could win this fight.
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You had heard the door open when Bellamy arrived back at the apartment. You couldn't bring yourself to move from your position, laying on the couch. So you stay put, you acted as if you were already in a deep slumber.
You heard the padding of Bellamy's steps as he made his way over to you. You wanted to open your eyes, to see if it was really him. Though you took it on good faith, dealing with him right at that moment was not high on your list of priorities. It settled you when he whispered your name. The sound of Bellamy's voice soothed you, reassured you that it was in fact, him.
You guessed that Bellamy was satisfied that you were asleep when you felt the weight of a blanket wrapped around your shoulders and shortly after, a warm pair of lips pressed to your temple. You heard his descending footsteps before you opened your eyes, just in time to catch a glimpse of his back before he left the room.
You remembered the time that Dean had placed a soft kiss on your head and had to bite back. As much as you wanted to suppress the memory, it would not leave. So you simply lay there, staring at the ceiling and waiting for the first rays of the morning sun to shine through the blinds.
Once you reached the cafe in the morning you noticed that Morgan wasn't there.
"Handed in her notice this morning," another waitress had told you. She frowned, shifting her long dark hair from her eyes as she continued "It was so weird, really sudden. She just said that she had to get away."
You stayed silent through most of the conversation and worked through until 6pm when your shift finished. You left as soon as it was over, stuffing your hands into the pocket of your red apron as you skulked across the road back to the apartment.
You barely acknowledged Bellamy as you walked through the door, untying your apron and throwing it on the couch before heading straight to the bathroom.
Bellamy had called out, though you ignored him.
You stood before the mirror, clutching the bathroom sink until your knuckles whitened. You watched your own face as a single tear spilled down your cheek.
"[Name]?" Bellamy's voice called out to you. He knocked on the wooden door a few times.
"I'm okay" you called back to him.
"Don't lie to me" he called back.
You were silent.
"Would you just come out here?" he questioned.
You sighed, wiping your thumbs over your cheeks and straightening your clothes before unlocking the door. Bellamy stood there with his arms crossed over his chest.
"You've been acting up for the past few days. What's wrong with you?" he questioned, his tone came out a little harsher than intended. When you didn't speak he let out a long sigh, placing a hand on your shoulder and waiting for you to look up at him.
You lifted your head to look into his dark brown eyes, "I'm not a good person Bellamy."
Bellamy rolled his eyes, "Okay, now you're just being stupid."
"I'm being serious Bell," you pushed. "Morgan left town because I..." you realised what you were saying, realised that Bellamy was not Sam and Dean. He wasn't a hunter. He would think you were crazy if you tell him the truth.
"Because you what?" he insisted.
"It doesn't matter what I did to her. I still made one of the worst decisions of my life when I came here" you changed the subject.
"Well, thanks" Bellamy chuckled.
You bit your tongue, "You know I don't mean it that way Bell. If I didn't have you I don't know what I'd do. It's just, I left some people behind, and the way that I left. I don't know if there is ever going to be a way to go back."
Bellamy appeared to scrutinize your every expression, "You love one of them."
You didn't deny it. You didn't know how to. Bellamy appeared to notice as he pulled you gently into his arms. You rested your head on his shoulder, just staying there for a moment. Maybe you did wish, deep down, that he was a certain someone else. But it was undeniable, in that moment your connection with Bellamy became as strong as ever.
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"Don't thank me. Be punctual. Clean up your mess" The last words that Death himself had said to Sam, Dean and Bobby, still lingered in the air.
The three of them had gone on a suicide mission in the last hopes to stop Castiel, whilst the crazed angel lingered in the reasoning that he was taking charge, fixing heaven and Earth, becoming God.
Needless to say, it was too far a reach for three normal men, one broken beyond repair. However Death had dealt them another card. Turning his frail and almost sickly body in retreat, he agreed to create a second eclipse. The means to open a door and return all of the powerful and dangerous souls, residing in Castiel, back to purgatory.
Dean had appeared to have given up as he sat at his laptop, drinking whiskey and watching 'cartoon smut' as Sam so elegantly named it. Sam, however, still had hope. The younger brother had to have something to believe in, somewhere to place his faith when he wasn't seeing Lucifer inside his broken mind.
Sam found himself wondering out to the yard, one thing playing on his mind. He looked up to the skies, "Hey Castiel," he sighed "Maybe this is pointless. I don't know if any part of you even cares, but, I still think you're one of us. Deep down and way off the reservation but... but we still have'til dawn to stop this. Let us help. Please."
Sam stared upwards for a moment longer, drawing in a breath. He couldn't think of [Name]. He couldn't think of how wrong and messed up things were, and he couldn't blame her for that, however much he wanted to. He couldn't deny it as his brother did. Sam wanted her back.
Sam came to the conclusion that Castiel was no longer listening. He checked his surroundings, though the angel was nowhere to be seen. He let out another breathy sigh before heading back inside.
He sat down at the table with Dean, finally accepting the tipple after Dean had agreed to close the laptop. Maybe he had to stop kidding himself. Maybe Dean was right, they were screwed.
"Sam?"the younger Winchester had to double take when he heard Castiel's voice sound from the doorway.
"Cas?" his tone was laced with worry and surprise as he and Dean both turned to look at the angel's bloody face and cracked, reddened skin. It almost looked as if he had been badly burnt. His vessel was falling apart.
"I heard your call," Castiel continued "I need help."
The brother's hurried, along with Bobby, to get Castiel to the place where the naive angel had first opened the gates to purgatory.
"We need the right blood. There's a small jar, end of the hall, supply closet" Castiel breathed out as he sunk down to rest on the floor. Sam nodded quickly before heading straight off to find what he needed.
Once Sam was out of sight Castiel turned his gaze to Dean, who was hurrying to prepare.
"Dean?" the angel almost choked.
Dean turned to look at Cas, seeming a little agitated, "What? You need something else?"
Castiel looked down, "No. I feel regret, about you and what I did to Sam."
"Yeah, well you should," Dean replied huskily as he turned his attention back to what he was doing before the distraction.
"[Name]," Castiel turned his attention "She would not be proud of what I have done."
Dean felt his chest tighten, he didn't reply.
"If there was time, if I was strong enough I'd fix it now," Castiel stopped for a breath "I just want to make amends before I die."
Dean stopped shifting the furniture around once more. Only offering a simple reply, "Okay."
Castiel shifted uncomfortably, not satisfied with Dean's reply, "Is it working."
"Does it make you feel better?" Dean questioned.
Castiel thought about it for a moment, "No. You?"
Dean stared the angel directly in the eye, "No."
Castiel let out a heavy sigh, "Do you think she would forgive me?"
Dean, knowing exactly of whom Castiel was talking, again ignored the question. It didn't help that Sam was taking his time.
"You wont talk about her" Castiel noticed.
"What's the point, Cas? I don't think she even cares," he paused thinking for a moment. Taking in the angel's heartbroken expression as [Name] came into the subject once more. "Yes," Dean clarified.
"You seem sure of it."
Dean glanced around before answering, "With how many times I was an ass to her, she forgave me every single time. She never brought it up again."
Dean thought about his own words until he was distracted by Bobby as he walked past Castiel to approach him, patting the angel's shoulder lightly on his way "hang in there, just a couple of minutes."
Bobby had question the one thing that Dean had been wondering. Where was Sam? Dean didn't say another word as he headed out of the door into a long brick hallway. He looked down where the jar of blood lay by his feet. He furrowed his brows, lifting the jar from the cobbled floor and calling out to his brother. When no reply came, Dean realised that he couldn't wait any longer. They were running out of time to return the souls that, if left be could destroy the Earth.
He returned to Bobby and wasted no time in opening the jar and painting the contents over the wall, creating the gate to purgatory. Once he was finished he helped Cas to his feet, leading him towards the sigil's as Bobby began to read off the ritual.
Castiel's vessel was weak, and he stumbled though Dean moved quickly to help him stand again. It was not long before the gates formed against the wall and a strong light shone through as the souls began to make their exit from Castiel's vessel and back through to purgatory.
Once the gates closed once more, Castiel fell in a heap on the ground. Dean and Bobby both ruched to his side.
"Cas?" Dean called out in concern.
Bobby felt his skin, "He's cold" he noted.
"Is he breathing?" Dean felt with his hand, to see if any air escaped Castiel's lips.
"No" Bobby sighed.
Dean looked hopeful, "Maybe angel's don't need to breath."
Bobby shook his head, "He's gone, Dean."
Dean shook his head. The people around him seemed to be dropping like flies, "Damn it," he and Bobby both rose to their feet "Cas, you child. Why didn't you listen to me."
Dean stared down at his friend a moment longer before air appeared to fill Castiel's lungs, causing his chest to rise. Dean thought that he was seeing things before the wounds began to disappear from the angel's face.
"Cas?" Dean called out again.
"That was unpleasant" Castiel shook his head as he began to sit up.
Bobby and Dean rushed to help him to his feet and supported his weight, though it wasn't long before Castiel overtook them. He straightened and pushed them away.
"What is it?" Dean turned back to look at the pained expression on Castiel's face.
"They held on inside me," Castiel hissed "They're so strong."
Dean's face paled as the next word escaped Castiel's lips in a scream, "Leviathan!"