I patted him softly, just like how he had patted me many years ago. I had wrapped my arms around him and rolled around on the sofa kicking a fuss. His arms were thicker than mine, able to easily press me down. I didn't have any free hands to fight back, so as a last resort, I bit his mouth. At the time, he had stared at me stunned, his face gradually reddening. I thought I had won, but now I wondered what my hyung could have been thinking then.
I watched this drunkard toss and turn, unable to sleep peacefully, his eyebrows restlessly creased together. I helped him to smooth out his furrowed brows. With my fingernail, I knocked lightly on the tip of his tooth resting on his lower lip. That canine tooth withdrew.
When my hyung slept, he looked very obedient. I propped my body up and looked downwards at this obedient appearance of his. I pulled him into my arms and raised my phone up to take a selfie, giving him many poses -- getting kissed and bitten by me. I chose the best-looking one and posted it to my facebook and Moments, then set it such that only my hyung could see it.
Soon after, while scrolling, I saw a picture of Jimin showing off him and his little girlfriend holding hands. I didn't want to accept this, so I held my hyung's hand too and posted a photo of our fingers interlocked. After thinking about it for a moment, I still set it such that only my hyung could see it.
My hyung's hand was bigger than mine, its shape slender. In the photo, we looked like a normal couple, but beneath Jimin's photo, there was a long thread of 'god bless you' comments left by classmates while there was nothing under mine when my girlfriend was obviously more good-looking.
I left a goodnight kiss on his forehead, then turned off the light and went to sleep holding hands with him. I was always concerned about how two men holding hands to sleep was too girly, so I lifted the blanket to cover our entwined hands, hiding it such that no one could see it. I felt that as long as misdeeds weren't seen by others, they could temporarily be correct.
The next morning, I was planning to attend morning self-study and was brushing my teeth. My hyung lazily pushed the door open and came in, fishing out his dick to pee loudly into the toilet.
He seemed like he was hungover, one hand rubbing his temples as he peed with his back facing me. His underwear was pulled down beneath his strong and firm waist, revealing his back dimples and half of his ass. I instantly got hard; my hyung's ass was very alluring, comparable to a prostitute half-draped in a bath towel licking her fire-red nails in front of me.
"Up so early? That's rare," He teased me as he peed.
"Tsk, you've just never seen an academic god before." My mouth was full of foamy bubbles. I could only answer him in a muffled voice as I gargled.
"In the past, Hyung never attended morning self-study."
"...Piss off." I had forgotten, my hyung was precisely the annoying type who looked like he didn't study but ended up getting first place in the final exams.
After peeing, he still didn't leave, dilly-dallying as he hugged me from behind, his chin resting on my shoulder. With a nasal morning voice, he teased me, "Good morning. Your morning wood hasn't ended?"
"Hyung, don't be lewd." I wanted to shove my toothbrush into my hyung's cock to help him wash the lewd scent away. Yesterday, I hadn't fucked him to death because I pitied this delicate flower of a hyung. Today, I had to turn the tables.
Our images were reflected in the mirror. I wore a mid-sleeved white school uniform with baggy uniform pants while he was only wearing grey and white boxers. I couldn't help but secretly outline his waist, arms and thighs with my gaze, finally landing on his chocolate bar-like abs.
Why weren't there any advertising companies seeking my hyung out to be their male underwear model?
But even if there were, I wouldn't buy them. I preferred wearing the ones he had worn before. The material seemed to feel softer, and I enjoyed this feeling of 'what's yours is mine and what's mine is yours'.
He kissed my neck lightly, then met my gaze in the mirror.
About a few seconds later, I still hadn't moved. My hyung's eager gaze dimmed and he let go of me, leaving.
I hurriedly wiped my face and tossed the towel aside, grabbing my hyung's wrist and pulling him back. I pressed on his waist, pushing him up against the crystal mosaic wall before kissing him fervently. I said to him hoarsely, Good morning.
He froze for a moment, and then the corner of his lips quirked up. His emotions could always be conveyed through his two canine teeth. I could feel that right now, he was in a very good mood. I couldn't resist licking his canine tooth.
"I was zoning out just now." My two hands were against the wall, trapping him in the small space in front of my chest. I asked, "Hyung, what are you getting upset about, just because I didn't kiss you?"
I had hit the nail on the head, yet my hyung still stubbornly refused to admit it.
"Hyung, have you heard of this small animal called a sugar glider? It's a small type of rodent. When it flies towards its owner, if it isn't caught by its owner, it will feel so upset that it gets depressed."
"...What are you trying to say."
"Jungkook, just now you were really like a little flying sugar glider that didn't get caught by me. Are you going to cry soon?" I tiptoed slightly, going from eye level to looking down at him. I lowered my head, the tip of my nose grazing against his earlobe, "If I didn't pull you back you would have cried, am I right?"
"Crazy, asking to be fucked right in the morning. When has hyung ever cried?" He lifted the corner of his lips, leaning against the wall. We were very close to each other. I could practically see the thin vellus hairs on his face being stirred by my breathing.
"Mm...you've cried before in my head, you were fucked by me until you cried." I didn't bring up the time he had cried because he did badly for his first mock exam, nor tell him about how he had gotten drunk last night and hugged me as he cried. I let him mistakenly believe that he was very strong as only then would he have the confidence to continue being my hyung.
Our eyes couldn't meet because once they did, we wouldn't be able to resist kissing each other. I slipped my tongue out first and soon after, he skilfully entangled his tongue with mine. The breathing sounds in the bathroom evidently grew heavier and messier. My hyung flipped us around and pinned me against the wall, his hands groping me under my shirt. His coarse palms brushed against my lower abdomen, arriving at my nipples. With his skilful rubbing and kneading, small jolts of electricity ran through the sensitive nerves of my body.
I had possibly let out sounds akin to those made by animals in heat, my erection making a tent in my school uniform pants.
To fight for the upper hand, the two of us each pinned the other down again and again. In the end, because we stepped on a puddle of water with our slippers, both of us fell onto the floor with a crash.
I hadn't hurt myself; my hyung had been protecting my head and elbows. He asked me which part of my body I had fallen on. I shook my head. He lowered his head and kissed me, using his tongue to teach me how to do a wet French kiss.
Perhaps I had been conditioned by my hyung until I was broken. When we kissed, my hole would also start to itch. I hadn't made love with my hyung for quite some time already. I missed it a little, especially when my body was filled up by his cock and his hand was wrapped around my painfully hard cock. When he stuck his fingers in my mouth and clasped my tongue too, my mind would always go blank. At that moment, I could only feel that I completely had hyung, a sense of security enveloping me from the point where our bodies merged. I also liked it when he held me in his arms afterwards, coaxing me with soft and gentle words. It was unreasonable of me, but I liked it.
Moreover, I still wanted to fuck my hyung. Men who didn't want to fuck beauties all lacked sexual desire. The two thoughts of wanting to be fucked and wanting to fuck my hyung swirled in my lower abdomen. This wasn't contradictory.
"Taehyung wants to fuck me that much?"
"I do, I really do."
"Get first in the cohort in your exams and hyung will let you fuck him."
"What the hell, do you know how fucking brilliant first place in my school cohort is? Direct admission to Seoul National University!"
"Then don't think of it anymore. Hyung didn't completely disallow you from fucking him either, it's you who can't score well enough, right?"
"Who in the world can score well enough?"
"Hyung can."
"...How about the top five hundred in the cohort...that's difficult enough already."
"Aim higher, top fifty. If there's anything you can't understand, Hyung will teach you."
"Okay." In my school, those in the top two hundred could already just take their pick of a 985 or 211 university. I was currently in one thousand and something place. I pretty much understood now, my disgusting hyung just couldn't bear to let his asshole suffer. He simply didn't want to let me do him.
We didn't make love today; I was late already. I had gotten up so early but still failed. It was all my hyung's fault for being a homme fatale and so enticing, harming the country.
[harming the country: Beauties 'harm the country' because in ancient China there are a lot of stories of emperors getting infatuated with a concubine, leading to the downfall of the dynasty.]
My hyung sent me to school. On the way there, my hyung asked me who had sent him back home the previous night. It appeared that this idiot had gotten blackout drunk. I said I drove him home.
"Hyung didn't do anything crazy, right?"
"...I guess you could say that."
"Hm?"
"You didn't."
He let out a sigh of relief. Just before leaving, I gave his butt a pinch and set off running. Unexpectedly, he was prepared and pulled me back into his chest, pinching my balls.
I hated how he was so composed like an old dog. Last night's hyung was still more obedient in comparison.
After morning self-study, I went to the toilet for smoke and idly scrolled through my phone. Suddenly, a news article popped up, stating that in the morning a man driving a black Jetta had scraped a Rolls-Royce front wedding car and the Rolls-Royce owner was claiming 1.79 million won in damages. The culprit's eyes were censored out, but I could still easily recognise that this unlucky man was Dad.
I fucking laughed until I choked on the cigarette smoke. As I laughed, I watched the interview video. Dad was grabbing at the traffic police, spewing curses. He said there was an unknown car that had kept tailing him along the minor road, so he was forced to come onto this road. He wasn't able to evade in time and hence scraped someone's wedding car.
Speaking of my dad, he was an expert at hitting his son but outside he was so cowardly he became a tortoise hiding in its shell. Usually, when he saw a flashy car, he would go around it. He said someone had been tailing him from a minor road, so there was an 80% chance it was true. It seemed like my hyung had already started.
I waited to return to the classroom on the dot. I sent my hyung a message: 'You did it beautifully.'
My hyung replied to me with a full stop.
I realised he had left a comment on the picture I posted on my Moments. I opened it and saw he had just left a heart.
I replied to him with a heart and an OK hand sign, meaning I was pinching his heart away.
I propped up an exercise booklet like a shack to hide that I was using my phone. I refreshed the page for a long time before he replied to me with a rose. Perhaps he was too bored in a meeting.
I replied to him with a rose and an OK hand sign, meaning I was pinching his flower away.
In this space where only the two of us could see each other's activity, we sent little emojis to each other. At this moment, we could temporarily not be brothers and date in the open. This was a love hidden in a corner, belonging exclusively to us foreign creatures.
It seemed like my hyung wasn't planning to explain to me how he wanted to fix Dad. If it were me, I would notify a money lending company to promptly receive Dad and have the Rolls-Royce car owner repeatedly pressure him at the same time. Then when Dad was forced to borrow money, I would hire a few debt-collection agencies to violently press him for payment. Driving him insane wasn't a problem.
I only knew that hyung definitely wouldn't kill my dad. When Dad became so scared that he completely retreated, my hyung would stop because half of the blood flowing in each of our bodies belonged to this scumbag. Firstly, the hatred between my hyung and my dad wasn't deep enough to be etched in their bones. Secondly, I knew that in the world of adults, wiping people out was rare. My hyung was a mature man. The fact that he was willing to fix Dad for my sake was already enough to make me feel touched.
But I wasn't the same. I was someone so vengeful that when a dog bit me, I also had to bite it back.
Every night since I was young, I would dream of them pulling my hyung out of my arms. I would grab onto my hyung, not letting go, so they used fire to burn my hands, a saw to cut off my arms and splashed me with sulfuric acid and pesticide. I only cared about holding my hyung in my arms, using my body to help cover his handsome face. As long as the lingering evil Dad lived on for another day, my nightmares would continue to go on endlessly every night.
A picture Dad had secretly taken and thrown into the school was still slotted in my Korean textbook. In the photo, I was hugging my hyung's waist, pushing him into a small corner of a public toilet to kiss him in secret. We were basically like two woodlice afraid of the light getting intimate together.
The skills of the secret photographer Dad had hired were too poor, making my hyung look ugly in the photos. I suddenly felt unusually indignant, my heart squeezing into a tight ball, a few crazy thoughts gradually taking shape in my mind.
I had to give my hyung a push.
Throughout the following week, my hyung kept insisting that he send me to and from school. On this day, his meeting was ending late so he messaged me through facebook to instruct me to wait a while in the classroom. He would have his assistant come and pick me up. Actually, the estate we lived in was just a few steps away from my school. It was evident that my hyung was recently having the intention to protect me and keep me away from Dad.
I didn't wait for him.
I knew that these few days, Dad had been waiting at the school gates to corner me. With my hyung around, he didn't dare to show his face. Today, I was alone. The moment I walked out of the school gates, that old bastard caught up to me.
The reason he came to find me was none other than to have my hyung help him pay the debts he owed from lending money and the fact that my hyung was ignoring him.
I said to him, My hyung doesn't have money. If you still don't pay up, wait to sit in jail then. Don't worry, we'll go in to visit you every once in a while.
There was no agreement in this conversation, and my scoundrel of a dad was a rude and unreasonable hoodlum. He yanked my hair and pulled me into his car. The school's security guards came over to stop him. His curses went on line after line, "Motherfucker, this is my second kid, I need you fuckers to control me disciplining my own son?"
Before I walked out of the school gates, I had already turned on my phone's audio recording function and kept it in my pocket. I had also notified Uncle Wang in the control room not to delete today's security camera recordings yet.
Dad's yanking made my scalp genuinely hurt. He kicked me onto the ground and forcefully stepped on my ribs. Expressionless, I let him vent. I thought to myself that it was best if he could step on and break a few of my ribs. That way, my hyung definitely wouldn't let him off.
The number of people surrounding the fight and attempting to mediate it grew greater and greater. I heard Chaewon and a few girls screaming, "We've called the police!" Dad probably didn't have much confidence, so he grumbled and swore as he dragged me onto the car planning to bring me home. He pulled the car door too fiercely and the corner of the door almost hit Chaewon's eyes. I helped to block it off and a red patch immediately formed on my palm.
He originally wanted to get me to lead him to my hyung's office. I said I didn't know the way. Then he said to bring him to the place where my hyung and I stayed. I said I didn't have the keys with me.
He had no choice but to bring me back to my old home. I sat in the old house that I had lived in for ten years. The electric kettle was rumbling as it boiled hot water and the cushions on the old sofa were already turning black with holes in them. That was where my hyung and I had first touched lips.
This old beast Dad; since force didn't work, tried to use persuasion, pulling the sentimental card on me. He said raising me through difficulties wasn't easy. Back then, we weren't in a good place and he gave me food and water and was good to me. The two of us unfilial sons only cared about ourselves and enjoyed life, even doing things that offended public morals. In the olden days, my hyung and I would have had to be drowned in a pig's cage.
Unfortunately, I yielded to neither force nor persuasion. Perhaps when a person was older, it was easy for them to selectively forget things. The scars from the club he had used were still deeply engraved in my skin, aching dully. The secretly taken photos that he had spread in my school were still piled under my desk. He wanted to ruin the peaceful and stable life my hyung and I led, yet now he had easily forgotten that and then sincerely forgiven himself.
Dad simply didn't understand; if he had treated his two sons just a bit better, we wouldn't have had to get to this point. One was a father and the other was an elder brother. In terms of blood relations, they were the family members closest to me. But one when drunk only knew how to curse and beat up everything around him, while what the other, when drunk, revealed was still tenderness born from his feelings of loss and emptiness. During one's time in this world, being the villain at least once was unavoidable, so I didn't plan on forgiving him.
It wasn't early anymore. I had to start getting down to proper business. I showed Dad the 'Wife's Pretty Pictures' on my phone.
In the first picture, I was kneeling in front of the full-length window. My ass was filled by my hyung's big cock and my head was turned back, kissing him. I was holding my phone to take a photo of the obscene image in the mirror of two bodies engaging in intercourse.
In the second photo, I was seated in the front passenger seat of the BMW. My hyung was holding my cock in my mouth, giving me head, the roses by his face scarlet red and promiscuous.
I let him browse through about three photos then kept my phone. The remaining photos were all classics in my precious collection; I couldn't bear to let them be sullied by the gaze of a beast.
I smiled faintly as I said, "Dad, those photos of yours are seriously not thrilling enough."
At this point, Dad was already so angry that his whole body was shaking. He picked up everything near him and threw them at me, saying he was getting rid of evil for the people. In a towering rage, he grabbed the boiling electric kettle and threw it at me.
"Little rascal, back then I really should have ejaculated that shot on the wall, fuck your mother's cunt..."
In mid-air, the scalding hot boiling water splashed out from the mouth and lid of the kettle. I had played basketball for many years so I did have the basic instinct of dodging, but I stood there and didn't avoid it.
Waiting for the kettle of boiling water to scald me was equivalent to pouring it on my hyung's heart. It was all thanks to my hyung's drunken confession that night, letting me know where I stood in his heart. For me, he would do things that went against his principles. I had confidence in this. When the time came, 'venting anger' for me would become helping me 'take revenge'. That's right, I only knew how to rely on my hyung. If I wanted to kill someone, he had to become a gun for me, because he was my hyung. It served him right.
I didn't know what I'd become after being splashed from head to toe by boiling water at one hundred degrees Celsius. I'd probably rot into a cactus that couldn't bloom. But I wouldn't die, I wanted to see how Dad would be killed by my hyung.
I suddenly heard the sound of glass shattering, followed by heavy footsteps. Someone had broken in through the window. I heard the sound of a shout on the verge of despair.
"TAEHYUNG----!"
The boiling hot water only splashed a bit on my collar. It was a bit hot, but not enough to injure me. My hyung had pulled me away and wrapped me tightly in his arms. I was dazed for a few seconds until I saw that my hyung's cheek and left hand protecting me had been scalded badly, blisters gradually forming.
I had forgotten a bit of the scene that day already. I only remembered that it was extremely chaotic. Police officers desperately pulled me away from Dad, and Dad had been beaten by me until he was a mess of flesh and blood.
I gave that bloody face a smile. As I smiled and smiled, tears trickled down my cheeks. I never expected that things would develop to this point. Hyung, I'm sorry.
I still remembered my hyung dragging me into the courtyard, roaring with rage as he questioned me, "Why did you leave with Das? Why didn't you dodge it just now?"
I stiffly replied to him with the truth. He suddenly punched me, kicking me over onto the ground and beating me up furiously.
I stared into his eyes. There seemed to be a little bird inside, pecking at my hyung's eyes until blood dripped out. I wanted to use my mouth to catch that cruel little bird, but ended up being slapped heavily by my hyung.
My hyung lit up a cigarette, then turned and left, not paying attention to me anymore. As I watched his back grow distant, I suddenly understood the meaning of the word 'childish'. I was childish, childish was I. Boys and men had a core difference, just like my hyung and I. I only knew how to cause trouble while my hyung could shoulder trouble. I had neither the ability nor the right to say I loved him.
I chased up to him, wanting to help him blow his hand. He yelled at me to scram.
I didn't want to scram, blindly following him. Suddenly, he received a call.
It was from Mum, saying her little son was about to start middle school. She wanted to live in a school district in the city and asked my hyung to think of a way to make it happen. She said, "After all, he's also your younger brother, right? I'll have Taeyan go see you in two days' time."
My hyung tiredly lowered his eyelids, his eyes bloodshot. Slowly, he let out an 'mn', "Got it."
On the first day of our breakup, my hyung got a new brother.