Noah decided a few weeks into the summer that we should go somewhere together, just the two of us, before he leaves for Harvard. Now that we're down to just a couple weeks before Noah's departure date, it's finally time for our weekend getaway. He frowns when I call it "One last summer adventure". I know he's tired of hearing about the last this and the last that. I can't help it, though, the only way I'm getting through these last few weeks with Noah, without thinking of him leaving and getting emotional all the time, is to try to make a big deal about everything we do. I can't cry on our last swim in the ocean, no being upset for the last sand volleyball game, so instead I try to make them feel like some sort of milestone to be celebrated. To crowd out the sadness I feel at the thought of Noah leaving. But, in my head, all I can think about is how spoiled I've been getting to spend the whole summer with Noah and how lost I'm going to feel when he's gone.
So, when Noah comes up with the idea for a trip, I think getting away from the beach house will be good for us. We didn't go far, just a few hours away from home to Joshua Tree. Having spent the whole summer at the beach, we wanted something a little different and you can't get much more opposite from being at the beach than going into the desert. Noah planned the whole thing and rented us a cabin. It was the first time either of us had done anything like this and we felt so grown up. Like adults. And I suppose Noah is actually an adult, getting ready to leave home soon.
I had to beg my Dad to let me go away for the weekend with Noah. I may also have coerced June into going to bat for me with my Dad. I'm not sure what she told him to help him decide that I could go but I do know she had to promise him that she'd already had follow up safe sex talks with both of us recently before he agreed. And as much as I hate the thought of our parents talking about our sex lives, I can handle anything as long as I get to go on this trip with Noah.
Noah rolled his eyes, as I came down the stairs with my biggest suitcase, backpack, and bag of toiletries. "It's just a weekend, Shelly, what all do you have packed in there?"
Lee, who was sitting in the living room, started laughing. "Well, let's see. She probably has enough clothes for at least a week, just so she has options everyday. . ."
"That's enough Lee." I yelled.
"Ooo, and I know she was debating about which of her lingerie she looked sexier in . . . " Lee made a gagging motion when he said the word lingerie and Noah shot him his best threatening scowl.
"I'm gonna kill you, Lee!" I yelled again to stop him, giving him my own threatening look this time. I'm sure I had turned bright red. June was somewhere around the house, I had said good-bye to her a few minutes ago, and she doesn't need to hear any of this.
Lee went on, clearly not worried about Noah or me. "What? I can't help that I overheard her talking to Rachel. And also ew, like I want to know anything about what you two do in private."
"Okay, that's enough Lee." Noah came to my rescue, pulling me into a sidearmed hug before grabbing my bags. "You can bring as much stuff as you want, Shelly. Are you all ready?"
"Yep, I just have to get the cooler and bag of snacks from the kitchen?"
"You put her in charge of snacks?" Lee asked.
I'm pretty sure Noah was working to keep his eyes from rolling a second time when he saw the size of the bag of snacks I was bringing along. "It's a long drive there and you want to make sure to have enough food for the whole trip . . ." I tried to explain. Okay, so maybe I had gone a little overboard, but this is the first time I had been going on a trip without a parent and I just wanted everything to go perfectly.
"Three days, Shell, we're only gonna be gone for three days." I heard Noah mumble as he started to carry everything out to the car.
"You guys have fun and don't do anything I wouldn't do." Lee called out as we walked towards the door.
"Love you!" I yelled to Lee, as Noah raised his arm and flipped Lee off without turning around.
Noah drove, of course, since he always complains about my driving. I was fine with it, though, since it meant I was in charge of the music and the snacks. I made him play the license plate game and all the other games that we used to play when the three of us were in the back seat on long car rides. He grumbled at first and complained that he had to concentrate on driving, so couldn't look at all the license plates. In the end, though, we were both laughing as we rushed to call out the state of every plate we saw.
When we decided to take a break from the game for a bit, I sighed and squeezed Noah's hand that had been in mine since we had gotten on the highway. "I'm going to miss you so much when you're gone."
"No." Noah is shaking his head, his eyes still staring straight ahead on the road.
"No?" I was confused what he was telling me no about.
"There will be no talking about me leaving on this trip. I'm so tired of hearing my parents talking non-stop about it. Listen, I know you're worried about it. I just want this to be a fun weekend for us, so please, can we just pretend I'm not leaving soon?"
I glanced over at Noah, trying to gage what he was feeling by his expression, but his face was blank and he was staring straight ahead, so it was hard to tell. I knew he had been annoyed by everyone a little lately but I didn't know that everything was bothering him this much. I wondered if he worried about what things would be like after he left as much as I did. I took a breath, and said as brightly as I could, "Of course. This is going to be an awesome weekend, I'm so excited for it!"
When we finally got to our cabin, Noah insisted on carrying all of our bags inside. "Don't be ridiculous, Noah, you can't carry everything. I have way too many bags for that."
"No problem, I have them." Noah said right before he dropped one of them.
So, I ended up carrying all the light bags, which I basically dropped, along with my jaw, when we walked inside and I looked around the cabin we were staying in. "Noah Flynn, how much money did you drop for this weekend?" I walked around the luxury cabin in awe. The rooms were minimally decorated but they didn't need anything more because the view from the windows was the focal point of each room. Each room I walked into was better than the last. From the bathroom with the glass enclosed shower, to the bedroom with the cushiest bed I've ever seen. There was a cute little kitchen and even a fireplace. The views were amazing also, it felt like we were in the middle of nowhere, just the two of us. Which was a good thing because once we went outside to the backyard and saw the outdoor waterfall shower and the hot tub, I couldn't wait to jump in with Noah. I'm not sure I had ever stayed in such a nice place. And I had stayed in some pretty sweet hotels and resorts on vacations with the Flynns. I know Noah has a bunch of stuff planned for us to do here this weekend, but I almost don't want to leave this place.
"Don't worry about the cost, Shell, I told you I wanted this weekend to be perfect." Noah looked so proud of himself, I wasn't going to argue with him about it, although I would have been happy anywhere we stayed. As long as I got to spend the weekend with him.
And it was a perfect weekend. Noah had planned everything. From the restaurants we ate in to the hikes we went on. He even found us an arcade to go to one night, followed by a night tour at the park where we had the most amazing view of the star filled sky. He had literally thought of everything. Plus, we were both getting a little spoiled by having so much privacy and not having to worry that someone was going to come home and catch us together. And we definitely made good use of that outdoor shower and hot tub.
I was starting to feel a little emotional as we were packing up and getting ready to leave for home. We had both been looking forward to the trip since Noah had first suggested it and now that it's over, I feel like that means the summer is over. I wanted to talk to him about what things would be like once he left for college and tell him again how much I was going to miss him, but he was right, we didn't need to do that this weekend. He already knew I was going to miss him and we had already talked about what we wanted things to be like for us once he was gone. Now we were getting close to finding out what that reality would look like for us.
I think Noah could tell that my thoughts were starting to spiral in my head, even though I was trying to act like everything was okay. He kept watching me as I was packing my bag. Finally, he walked over and took the make-up I was trying to pack out of my hands and pulled me onto his lap as he sat down on the bed. "Hey, we had a fun weekend, right?" I nodded and Noah went on. "I wish we could stay here forever but it's time to face reality." He pulled me in for a long kiss before starting to kiss down my neck.
"Noah, we can't start that again, we have to get out of here soon." I giggled, putting my hands on his chest to push him away, although once I touched his chest, I just kept my hands there.
Noah finally pulled away with a low groan, giving me one more peck on my lips before pulling a small wrapped box out of his pocket and handing it to me.
"What is this?"
"Just a little something for my girl."
"You didn't need to get me anything, you're the one leaving, I should have gotten you a going away present."
"No, you didn't need to get me anything. And we're still not talking about it, at least not until we get home. We have a few more hours left of our weekend. But, I wanted to give you this while I knew we still had some privacy and I'm worried that we won't have any more once we get home. I'm afraid my Mom is not going to leave my side until I have to leave. Open it, Shelly."
With the grin he was giving me, I didn't feel too bad about not getting him anything. I could tell he was really excited about this. I tore the paper off and opened the box to find a beautiful necklace.
"Oh Noah, it's gorgeous!"
As soon as I pulled the necklace out of the box, Noah started to tell me about it. "See, it's a locket, you open it right there on the side." He pushed the button on the side, so I could see what was inside. "A picture of us from the first day at the beach house this summer, so you can always remember it. God, that was a great day." Noah kissed me on my temple before helping me out the necklace on.
"Aww, Noah, that is so sweet, I love it and I love you!"
"I love you too, Shell."
I could feel my eyes fill with tears. I didn't want Noah to see me crying, even though they were happy tears, so I started kissing him and this time it was him who had to remind me that we were going to have to get on the road soon.
The drive back to LA went by quickly and the mood was much more subdued than the drive to Joshua Tree had been. Although that's not to say that I wasn't able to get Noah to sing along to a few of the songs on my playlist. I've just had the most amazing weekend with the most incredible boyfriend but as we get closer to home, I can feel this sense of worry starting to creep in. I can't help but feel apprehensive about what is to come.