River, age seventeen
Five months later.
I'm losing my ever fucking mind. I hate this. I hate this. Winter is almost over, the snow is thick and covers everything. I'm pissed off, I'm cold and I need sex. But I won't risk hurting some poor soul just to strive off my need for sex. I don't want sex from my herd, I'm terrified of hurting them or worse.
So I'm walking, outside in the woods, in the dark. I feel eyes on me, great. Just great. "It's been a while, Elentiya." I let my eyes fall closed at Cernunnos's voice. The male or well God that helped me have my daughter.
"That it has. Cernunnos, God of Wild Things, Vegetation, Trees and Lust." I turn towards him, his face has a little bit of surprises on it.
"Ah. You figured out who I am." He smiles and steps towards me.
"You came for me because I carried a gods child, right?" I ask softly, I still carry the sadness and loss with me everyday.
Cernunnos blinks at me. "What? What are you talking about?" Confusion and shock line his face.
"You didn't know? I had sex with Aengus, the god of Youth, Love, Summer and Trickery. The daughter you helped me have, was his." My teeth shake, I do not want to talk about this but I need too.
"That's why they-" Cernunnos swears and turns away from me, I blink at him. He really didn't know. He turns back towards me with regret in his eyes. "I did not know. I am sorry if you thought I knew but I had no idea."
"I got that. You don't have a good poker face. Tell those other gods and goddesses to back the fuck off and leave me alone." I'm shaking as I step closer to Cernunnos. His eyes are wide as I tilt my chin up to meet his dark brown eyes. "I don't want their eyes on me, I can feel them watching me. Tell them to stop. I'm not an entertainment. I am not your toy that you get to watch. If any of you come near me again, I will find a way to kill a mother fucking god."
"Elentiya-"
"It's River. My name is River. You tell them to back off. I can't handle anymore of their bullshit. Next time one of them show their faces to me, I will kill them." I will not hesitate. Their lives will be forfeit.
"River. . ."
This will bite me in the ass later. If I live long enough. "I don't care if you watch me or check up on me but no others."
"Why?" He breathes, his eyes searching my face.
I smile softly. "Because of my daughter. The one you were there for. You helped me when I didn't want anyone to know about her. You were there are one of the hardest days of my life. You didn't judge me for hiding her. For not wanting the others to know." Tears slide my face as I press my hands to his face. "I will kill them if they come near me again. But because of Raya, you may watch me or check up on me."
I step away from him. "Please. River, do not do this."
"Cernunnos I'm tired. I'm tired of being watched, I'm tired of being an entertainment, I'm tired of being used." I back away and he lets me leave.
Five months later.
I fist my hands in my hair as I walk down the road. I can't keep doing this. I'm losing my mind! I've been able to keep everything together around my herd and kids but I can't. I can't keep doing this!
I can't lose control of the magic. I need to breathe. Deep breaths. In. Out. In. Hold it. Out. Hold it. In. Hold it. Out. Nope. Not working. Fire burns in my veins. Don't lose control. I can't let my magic out. Can't let my others out.
I need everything to stop. I force my legs to walk faster. I need to get out of town, I can't stay here. Not when I could lose control at any moment. Fire is brewing inside me. My magic is slamming against the walls I have carefully built. The walls will crumble.
I need to get out. Out of this body. This skin. This life. I need everything to stop. I can't lose control. Everything is fine. I'm fine. I won't lose control. Yeah no, I don't believe my own bullshit. Breathe. I need to breathe, don't let go of the magic. Don't let it out. Just breathe, everything is fine. "You know that girl about five blocks down? She pissed me off so I think she should be next."
My hearing picks up a males voice, from the house I'm behind. I stop moving. "Oh her? She's a pretty little thing. I wouldn't mind hitting that." Another male says, my jaw locks and my magic raises up. I shove it down.
"We could grab her tonight. I don't have anything better to do." A third voice responds to the other two. Fuck me.
"You remember the first bitch we fucked together?" A male voice asks, it's different from the first three. It's coming from the house beside the first.
"Oh yeah, wasn't it the blonde who, wouldn't stop screaming?" Fire burns in my chest, I hope they're not talking about I think they are.
"Yeah, she was like 'it hurts! It hurts! I don't want this! Please stop!' Oh that one got us started on hunting females for sport." I see red as I pick up another conversation.
"Yeah there's a little boy who hangs around the back ally, by himself. We should get him next, since we got a female last time. I want a boy." Smoke comes out of my nose as the male speaks.
"Well how old is he? You know I can't get off unless they're under ten." My eye twitches as my magic raises inside of me. Fire and ash heat my blood.
"I've seen the boy. He's about eight. A little too skinny for my taste." Fucking hell.
My throat feels like I've choked on ash. Anger burns through me, must hold it in. Three males. In each house. Nine males all together. My entire body is shaking. My magic roars in my ears, crap. I don't think I can keep it locked down. Blue lines of fire run down my arms, I lock my jaw. Shit. Not here. Not now.
'Eh we fucked up. We're about to blow.'
'Shut it Shadow.'
Fire races out of my body, I watch in horror as it consumes the three houses and rages around me.
'We're gonna pass out.'
'Again shut it Shadow.'
My fire wraps around my body and my vision blurs and I hit the ground. Fuck me.
...
I wake in a cell. What. The. Fuck? I go to stand but chains stop me. What the fuck happened? I look around, I can't see anyone. What happened?
'We fucked up, remember? We hung onto the magic too long. We burned three houses to the ground along with nine people in them. Granted they were dicks but still. We passed out and got caught.'
Shadow informs me. She's back?
'Well shit. So I'm guessing we're in a Royal holding cell?'
'I would assume so, yes.'
Rebel replies. God it's strange to hear them after not hearing them for over a year.
'It's weird to not be locked down after a year of getting used to it.'
'Sorry.'
'You didn't have a choice. Us being up front and aware of things, would have made everything worse.'
Shadow responds.
'Someone is coming.'
Rebel whispers, I feel them leave my mind as a guard opens my cell and drags me out. I let myself be dragged. I gotta link Rainer. Tell him what happened, make sure he takes care of the herd. Also convince him to not try to get me out. I'll figure that one out on my own. I don't need him getting in trouble for me.
Fucking hell. What have I gotten myself into? Oh fuck. My kids. I have a little over three years left to spend with them. Fuck. What am I going to do? I'm brought into a throne room, all of the High Court Kings are in here. My knees shake but I force them to hold me up. Pull it together. I've got this. I will get out of here. One way or another. Whether it's death or not. I will get out of this, everything will be fine.
'Neither you or I believe your bullshit.'
Rebel chuckles sadly.
'Oh hush.'
Denzel Greenbriar King of Fae, Alpha. Dark grey eyes and dark blonde hair. Nero Whitethorn King of Wolves, Alpha. Brown eyes and black hair. Farrell Blackthorn King of Griffins, Delta. Red eyes and bright orange hair. Ezekiel Archeron King of Angels, Alpha. Dark grey eyes and Dark grey hair.
Duron Sloan King of Witches, Alpha. Dark purple hair and eyes. Azim Tunder King of Fallen, Pride, Alpha. Red eyes and black hair. Idris Arlo King of Shifters, Alpha. Lime green eyes and forest green hair. Gladius Sagitta King of Hybrids, Archangel/Bojevnik, Alpha. Blue black hair and dark purple eyes.
The High Court Kings are all staring at me. "What is your name female?" Denzel King of the Fae asks me, his voice rough with restrained anger.
'This is not going to go well.'
Shadow breathes, horror washing through us. "River Marshal." I answer not really sure what if I'm supposed to say anything else or not.
"River. You killed nine people. Mind telling us why?" Nero questions me.
"Uh yes. I mind very much." Stupid mouth.
"What did you just say?" Ezekiel snaps, I shiver but force myself to straighten up.
"I said I mind very much. You may suck my dick." Oh god. Why can't I shut my damn mouth?
"Why did you chose to kill nine people?" Farrell snarls, down boy. Oh don't say that out loud.
"I don't see how that's any of your business." I am going to go off myself now.
"Excuse me?" Idris sounds down right shocked.
"You're excused." Oh for the love of-
"What are you?" Duron changes the subject. My stupid mouth is going to get me thrown over a fire. "The fire that burned down three houses and nine people left nothing. What are you?"
"That is also none of your business." Why not jump in the deep end? Since I'm already digging myself a grave. "I won't answer your questions."
"Easier question. How old are you?" Gladius asks much calmer than the other Kings.
"I'll be eighteen in two months." Every single one of the Kings mouths drop open in shock.
"You're only seventeen?" Gladius pulls himself together first.
"Mhm I'll be eighteen in two months."
"So why kill nine people and give yourself a death sentence?" Azim narrows his eyes at me. I just shrug. I have nothing to say. I didn't mean to kill them, I would have sent Rainer to do it without getting caught.
My magic has a damn mind of its own. "Are you going to answer his question girl? Or just stand there?" Ezekiel growls.
"I have nothing to say. I don't know what to say." My brain is miss firing somewhere.
"Take her back to my cells." Ezekiel snarls at the guards behind me. They grab my arms and drag me out of the throne room.
I most definitely fucked all the way up. I'm thrown back into the cell. My knees scrap the ground and I feel blood run down my calves. Aw hell. The cell door clicks shut, I hear the lock turn.
I'm left alone. I fall back on the hard concrete, it's cold. "Hey Rainer?"
"Yes Bluebell?" Rainer's voice makes my eyes close and a tear slide my cheek.
"I uh I'm in a cell."
"WHAT?!"
"Shh calm down. Let me finish." I take a deep breath, he's going to be so mad but there's nothing I can do. "After work I was walking home. My magic was raging more than normal. I heard some shit as I passed three houses. My magic ripped out of me, there was nothing I could do to stop it. All three houses burned. Nine people died. I passed the hell out and woke up in a cell. To be fair though I was going to send you to kill them but I never got to that. I just went before the Hight Court Kings. I couldn't turn my stupid mouth off. So on the bright side they should 'kill me' and I should be home soon. Since they don't know how to kill me. Or what I am."
"WHAT THE FUCK RIVER?!?!?" I wince at his loud distraught voice.
"Everything will be fine. Just don't try to recuse me."
"You can't ask me not to get you out!"
"I can and am. Please Rainer. I'll be fine. Even if they send me to prison, none can hold me. I'd get out. If they 'kill me' I'll just come back and come home. Don't worry. I'm fine."
"River! Tell me which castle. I'll be there in ten minutes." Rainer's voice is pleading.
"No. Just take care of my kids till I can get out. Promise me Rainer. You won't try to spring me out, no matter what. And you'll take care of my kids and the herd. Please Rainer, promise me."
"River. . ."
"Promise me."
"I promise." I can hear the defeat in his voice. I know he'll keep his word.
I notice movement in the corner of my eye, I sit up and stare at Ezekiel. "Looks like your mine for the foreseeable future. Till you decide to tell us why you killed nine people."
I do not like the look in his eyes at all. "On second thought Rainer. I may not be home for a while. I still need you to keep your promise."
* Three months later. *
Rebel.
From the back of my neck down to my ankles, is on fire. I refuse to scream. I will not give them that. Never. "Answer my questions and this all stops." Ezekiel's voice make my skin crawl more than the fire at my back.
"Go to hell." I bite out. I'm fucking bleeding out. Yet they won't let me die. They never do.
"What are you? You heal better than every creature that's known." Ezekiel presses on.
I'm glad they've put my hair in a bun that's at the very top of my head. Otherwise I wouldn't have any hair left. I love my hair. "Go to hell." Those are the only words that ever pass my lips.
I will never give in. Never break. "Answer my questions and this all tops." Ezekiel won't give up. Three months of this shit. Always the same. He asks the same things, I reply go to hell. Rinse, repeat. Over and over, again and again. Isn't he bored of this shit? I am.
"Go to hell." A torch is pressed against my back, my eyes roll to the back of my head.
"Why did you kill nine people?"
"Go to hell." Oh I am in pain. So much pain. I live off pain and spite. No one can break me. I won't submit.
"What are you?" Ezekiel needs to come up with different questions. These are starting to get annoying.
"Go to hell." Another torch is pressed against my ass. Aw hell. That's wonderful. Burn scars on the ass. Does that make my ass on fire?
"What the fuck is wrong with this female? How is she not breaking?!" Ezekiel's frustration makes me smile through the pain.
"I will never break. Keep trying." The heat at my back grows, oh wow. Shit that's hot as hell.
Shit. Fuck. "You will break. One way or another." Ezekiel growls. Just to fuck with him I push my back towards the fire. I feel it burning my sides, grazing my hips. I close my eyes as I let the pain ground me. "Shit! Get her off!"
On no. Not yet. Not when I'm starting to enjoy this. "Aw did they heat get to much for you males?" I snicker at my own joke. My body sags as I'm finally removed from the fire. I can't stop shaking. This torture is nothing compared to what I went through when I was younger. But fuck if it doesn't hurt. I refuse to scream. To make a damn sound. I think it's pissing these guards off, it's definitely pissing Ezekiel off. I won't break. Not for anyone. They'll just have to kill me.
Which they are avoiding doing. Every time I can taste death, everything stops. It is oh so annoying. "I don't care what you do to her. Get me the information I want. This female will break. They all do." Ezekiel snaps at one of the guards.
"Yes sir." I hear Ezekiel leave. That's when the guards take turns kicking and punching me. It goes on so long with them yelling questions at me. I don't ever respond to them. No one will break me. I won't allow it. Someone picks me up by the neck and slams me into the cell bars, he gets in my face. "Answer me!"
I smile at him. "Never." I spat blood in his face. This male jerks back and full on punches me. I hear more than feel my cheek bone crack. I'm dropped to the ground and the kicking and punching returns.
I close my eyes and enjoy the pain. I'm used to pain. I bask in my aching body. The blood flowing down my back and face. Though the blood in my mouth is gross. My own blood is not good. It's disgusting. To me anyway. Rainer and my herd seem to like it. Though I like Rainer's blood. I wonder if it's a Forsaken thing to not like our own blood. I mean maybe it's so we don't try to feed on ourselves. Hmm that seems valid.
"It's like talking to a brick wall. She doesn't even react! How does a seventeen year old know how to bite their tongue?"
I've been here three months. I'm no longer seventeen. "Eighteen. I'm eighteen as of last month."
"That makes her speak? Seriously?" The kicking and punching doesn't stop. Rude.
"Yes. I'm eighteen."
"Seventeen. You're fucking seventeen. That's what we were told. I don't believe murderers."
"You should. We have interesting minds. Heh you'd probably like me if you'd met me before this."
"I highly doubt that."
I chuckle then choke on the blood in my mouth. I spit out as the hits get stronger, oh big guy is here. He always hits harder. "I'm eighteen. You'd probably would have wanted to fuck me. If we met before all of this."
"Stop lying bitch!" Males!
"I'm not lying you fucking dick!" Someone breaks four ribs in one go. "Ooh whoever broke four ribs at once, good job. That's not easy."
"What is wrong with this child?"
"Not a child. But there is so, so much wrong with me."
"I think this is the most I've ever heard her say."
"Oh most definitely. But that's because the other guys keeps calling me seventeen when I'm eighteen now. As of last month." Op I think someone just broke my hip bone. Nice.
"Fucking lair! You're seventeen! God why does this make her talk?"
"Get it right lovely and I'll shut up." Why did I call that asshole lovely? Am I losing my mind?
"What did you call me?"
"Eh ignore me. I think I'm losing my mind. Oh it might be blood lose. I'm chopping it up to one of those. Ah black spots I'm gonna pass out now. Till next time assholes. I'll see when I wake up for another round." Yeah I'm fucked.