"𝚁𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝙽𝚘𝚠"
ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ
𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘴' 𝘢𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵
NOAH WAKES UP and feels her head pounding. She remembers her tears from the night before as she rubs her puffy eyes. She steps out of bed and pets Sergio before disappearing into the bathroom to shower.
When she comes out, she gets dressed in her room and brushes through her wet hair. She sighs as she looks at her school uniform in the mirror. She wishes she could wear regular clothes to school.
"C'mon, Noah!" Emily shouts from downstairs. "We're gonna be late!"
The teen peers over at the clock on her nightstand and realizes that she has been in the shower for too long. She throws her shoes on and stuffs her bookbag with her homework off her desk. She rushes down the staircase, almost tripping on her untied laces on the way down.
"Hurry!" Emily says as she opens the front door, leading them outside and to the car. Noah sulks in her seat as she realizes she did not even have the chance to eat or grab a coffee.
"Did you sleep last night?" Emily asks.
"Not really," Noah admits. "I was studying."
"Do you have a test today?"
"Tomorrow," Noah says. It was true, she does, but she was not studying, she was reliving the memories of her past.
"You'll do great, honey," Emily chimes as she blindly strokes Noah's hair with her attention still on the road.
"Can we listen to the hip-hop channel?" Noah asks as she turns the knob on the radio without an answer.
"How did I birth a rap-lover?" Emily questions as she hears the lyrics to the newest Jay-Z song.
"Please don't say rap-lover," Noah pleads with a small smile. "Or talk about birthing me," She adds with a giggle.
"I was trying to make you laugh," The mother says as she pulls into the carpool lane.
"No, you were being old," Noah chuckles. "But we can say it was to make me laugh."
"Anyways," Emily says. "Please try to have a good day. I know you're tired, but it'll be over before you know it, okay?"
"Okay," Noah replies with a broader smile. Emily strokes her cheek and places a short kiss on the teen's nose.
"I love you," Emily coos.
"Love you too," Noah says before opening the car door and swinging her bag around her shoulder. "Bye, Em!"
"Bye, bub!"
Noah turns around and rushes toward the school building, hoping to make it to class on time. Emily just shakes her head with a grin as she watches her daughter.
Noah goes to her first two classes, waiting for the school day to go by as quickly as Emily said it would. The bell finally rings for study hall and Noah rushes through the halls to get to the library, where she studies with one of her friends from class for the test tomorrow. The bell rings for lunch and Noah rushes again to get to her favorite part of the day.
The teens laugh, catch up, and complain about all their homework and tests. Noah finally felt her stress settle as she found herself surrounded by her friends. The people who have never judged where she came from and brought her into their inner circle.
As they all disperse from lunch, Noah waves them all goodbye and kisses Jess. They rush to their classes, but something stops Noah.
"Ms. Prentiss," A voice calls, making the teen's feet screech to a halt. "Do you have a minute?"
Noah turns around and sees Mr. Holden standing in the doorway of his classroom. She looks down the hallway, not wanting to be late, but peers back at him and nods, knowing she cannot say no to him.
"What's up?" She asks as she walks into the classroom behind him.
"I won't hold you too long, but..." He trails off as she grabs a piece of paper from his desk. "I wanted to be the one to hand this to you."
Noah takes the paper from his hand and reads over the top of it. Her mouth falls open at the words and she looks up at him in shock. He offers her a smile and watches her read it over again.
"Congratulations," Mr. Holden chimes. "You should get to work. And probably class, too."
Noah nods with a wide smile. "Thank you, I won't let you down."
"I know you won't."
Noah walks out of the classroom and into the hallway, reading the paper one more time. She peers up and sees a head of blonde hair turning the corner. She picks up her footsteps as she tries to catch the first person she wants to show the news to.
"Noah—" Someone says, but Noah rushes past them.
"Can't talk!" She exclaims as she dodges people left and right, trying to get through the crowd.
"Slow down, Ms. Prentiss!" A teacher calls out.
"Sorry!" Noah exclaims as she slows down. Once she turns the corner, she starts running again.
She sees Jess a few steps in front of her and goes around one last person to get close enough. Noah grabs Jess' arm and pulls her towards her, making the blonde whip around in shock.
"Oh my God, you scared the hell outta me," Jess sighs as she releases the breath she suddenly held in.
"C'mere," Noah says as she pulls the blonde through the crowd to an emptier hallway.
"Where're we going?" Jess asks. "I just saw you a couple minutes ago."
"It's a surprise," Noah chimes.
"I have class—"
"Slow down," Noah mutters as they walk past a teacher. As they round the corner, Noah drags Jess by the hand and pulls her outside through a pair of double doors.
"What's happening?" Jess asks as they stand outside.
"I got it," Noah blurts out with a wide smile.
"What?" The blonde questions.
"I got it," Noah repeats.
Jess pauses for a moment before the realization hits her. "It?"
"It," Noah nods.
"Oh my God!" Jess exclaims as she grasps Noah's hands, "You got it?!"
"I got it!"
Jess screams in excitement and jumps up and down, falling into Noah, and snaking her arms around her waist. Noah hooks her arms around the blonde's neck and jumps with her. They pull apart to look at each other and Jess cannot help but kiss Noah's lips sweet, but firmly, emitting her everlasting pride.
Their lips separate, but Noah keeps her arms around Jess' neck. "You're looking at the Science National Honor Society guest speaker," Noah announces.
"I'm so proud of you!" Jess happily sighs as she pulls Noah's face in and kisses her again. "You're gonna be amazing. And we can practice your speech and maybe I can sneak into the meeting when you present it!"
"I'm sure Mr. Holden wouldn't mind," Noah says. "I'll need you anyways."
Jess smiles and squeezes Noah's waist. "Oh my God, Emily's gonna be so excited! You have to tell her right away!"
"We still have class," Noah replies with a frown.
"Oh yeah," Jess pouts as the bell rings again, signaling they have one minute to get to class. "We gotta run!"
"Wait," Noah says, pulling the blonde back into her embrace before she can run off to class. Jess goes to groan about being late but is shut up by Noah's lips meeting hers. As they pull apart, Jess simply smiles and happily pecks Noah's lips once more.
—
Noah darts towards the street, walking out and sprinting the last few steps to avoid the car coming straight for her. She makes her strides longer as she goes up the stairs to the FBI building, skipping a step at a time. Once she gets to the door, she swings it open and continues her rush through the lobby.
"Hi, can't talk today, but thank you!" Noah exclaims as she walks past June at the front desk, who opens the gate for her to walk through.
Noah presses the elevator button a thousand times before it opens and she squeezes through, quickly pressing the sixth floor and repeatedly pressing the button to close the doors. She taps her foot as the elevator rises. She dashes out once the doors leave enough room for her to get through, running to the glass door of the BAU and grabbing the handle.
Emily does a double-take as she realizes the person running through the busy bullpen is her daughter. "Woah, honey, slow down—" She chuckles, but Noah cuts her off.
"I got it!" The teen beams. "Look!" She adds as she holds the paper out to Emily.
The mother reads the piece of paper, her eyes widening the further she gets.
"You did it!" Emily exclaims as she stands. "I'm so proud of you!" She adds before pulling Noah into a tight embrace.
"Mr. Holden told me today," Noah replies. "I didn't think he'd pick me."
"Why wouldn't he?" Emily asks as she reads the paper again. "I told you he would! I'm so proud of you, baby. This is amazing."
"Thanks, Em," Noah chimes and hugs her mother again.
Emily pulls away from the hug and cups her daughter's cheeks. "I love you so much. I'm so proud of you, Noah."
"I love you too, Em," The teen replies, feeling her mother's kisses all over her face.
"We have to get your favorite dinner to celebrate!" Emily exclaims and turns to look at the team in the bullpen. "We're going to the Italian place to celebrate!"
"What are we celebrating?" Morgan asks.
"Noah got the guest speaker spot for her Honor Society," Emily announces.
"Cool!" Spencer exclaims. "What's the topic for?"
As Noah goes to speak, Emily stops her. "Why don't we save it for dinner?"
"I'll tell you all about it at dinner, Doc," Noah says. "Emily?" She asks as she pulls the woman's sleeve, making the mother lean down. "Are you sure we should go to dinner? I don't want everyone to have to change their plans."
"It's okay, honey, everyone is happy to celebrate you," Emily reassures her.
"Can we have ice cream after with just the two of us?" Noah requests.
"Of course, bub, whatever you want," The mother says and kisses Noah's head.
—
"Congratulations, munchkin," Penelope coos as she hugs the teen and kisses her forehead. "I'm so proud of you and I love you."
"I love you, P," Noah giggles and hugs her once more.
"Congrats," JJ says as she takes her turn to hug the teen. "You're gonna be amazing, I just wish I could be there to see it."
Noah smiles as she chokes on the words in her throat. She is not used to all the attention, and there is no one else she would rather celebrate with than the team. Everyone that changed her life was sitting at that dinner table beside Jess and her friends.
Everyone says their congratulations and gives Noah their last hugs of the night, even Hotch.
"C'mon, baby," Emily says with a wide smile. "Let's go get that ice cream."
"Bye!" Noah waves the team off and she hooks her arm with Emily's. The two walk to the car and make their way to their favorite ice cream place a few blocks away. Emily parallel parks on the street and they rush inside to make it in before they close for the night.
"What do you think you're gonna get today?" Emily asks as she holds the door open for her daughter.
"Maybe double chocolate or I haven't had their rocky road in a while," Noah replies. "Or the s'mores. Jess told me that one was good."
"That does sound good," Emily notes.
"Maybe you can get s'mores and I'll get the rocky road and we can share," Noah makes a compromise.
"Sounds like a plan."
The two order their ice creams and take their cups to the car, where they turn on the radio and enjoy their treat. They talk about Noah's speech, Emily's work, and funny stories of each other's friends. As Noah laughs, she looks down at her ice cream and swirls the remainder of it around in the bottom of the cup. Emily peers over at her daughter and smiles widely at the grin that will not leave Noah's mouth.
"Can you believe that it hasn't even been a year of knowing each other?" Emily asks.
"We're almost there, though," Noah says. "We should do something to celebrate our one year."
"We can go to a nice dinner," Emily suggests. "Cheers to one year of being mother and daughter."
"That sounds so weird," Noah says with a giggle.
"But it's our normal."
"I wish it was longer than a year."
"Me too," Emily replies as her smile fades. "But, now we have forever, right?" She adds as she puts her ice cream cup down on the middle console.
"Yeah," Noah softly sighs.
"The past can be the past. We have right now."
"Yeah," Noah repeats. "The past can be the past."
Noah takes her empty cup and her mother's as well. She jumps out of the car and throws them away in the trash can outside the shop. Emily watches her closely, making sure nothing happens, even though she is only a few feet away from the car. Noah gets back in and buckles her seatbelt.
On their drive home, the teen looks over at Emily, taking in her mother's side profile every now and then. She wishes she had more time with her, but she cannot focus on that. All she has is right now. And she cannot waste another minute.
—
𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕪 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕟𝕖𝕩𝕥 𝕞𝕠𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘
Noah slides open her window and peers into the dark morning. She glances back at her bedroom door to make sure it is locked and jumps down, landing on the AC unit on the ground. She walks towards the front of the townhouse and grabs her bike. She pedals her way down the street and toward the lake.
Noah tosses her bike to the ground and heads towards the trail. She makes her way along the path and comes across the beaten-up dock. She walks down the wood panels, eyeing all the plants that have grown their way through the cracks. The dock rocks back and forth, making Noah hold her arms out to steady her steps. As she gets towards the end, one of the last panels snaps under her foot and forces her to fall.
Noah's breath hitches as she feels the water surround her. She feels herself sinking further and further, but she peers up at the surface. She sees Emily's face peeking through the small ripples above her. Noah moves her arms and pulls herself up, but feels a force pulling her down. She looks down at her foot and sees a sunken branch holding her down.
She panics for a moment until she realizes that she can pull her foot out. Once she frees herself, she quickly swims to the top and comes up with a tremendous gasp for air. She swims towards the dock and pulls herself up, hoping the rickety panels will not fail her again. Her coughs echo through the woods that surround the water, disappearing into the early morning.
Noah lies on the wood and takes deep breaths. She turns to her side and looks at the makings of the dock. The wood is damaged and broken—exactly how she feels on the inside. And the beautiful greenery that grows up the pilings under the water seeps through the cracks, just like how Emily found her way around Noah's heart and soul. What comes across as a problem is actually what is reviving the dock, keeping it in place.
Noah sobs as she feels the water droplets from her fall being replaced by tears. She slowly lifts herself up and looks at the panels again. Her despair quickly turns into anger as she pulls her hand back and throws her fist to one of the panels.
The teen stands to her feet and looks out at the water. She peers down and shakes her head, muttering to herself. "I'm not responsible for you."
Noah realizes that the decaying wood would not be deteriorating if there was nothing to wear it out. She realizes that Gia wore her out. She stripped her until she was nothing but the shell of a person. She hurt her until she had no emotions left, even in the afterlife. But Noah could not let that happen anymore.
"It's not my responsibility to make you feel better for hurting me," Noah says aloud. "It's not my responsibility to try to forgive you. It's not my responsibility to miss out on my life for you anymore. It's not my responsibility to live in the box you trapped me in. It's not my responsibility to reverse the situation you put yourself in. It's not my responsibility to fix you."
Noah sighs as she reaches into her pocket and pulls out the necklace she took from Gia's drawer. She rubs her finger over the engraving of the tulip. It was the last time she would seek comfort in its shape. Noah balls the chain up in her fist and throws it as far as she can, watching it disappear under the water, never to be seen again.
"You're not my responsibility anymore—and you never were."