Listen To: "You" by Louyah
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"Okay, thank you Dr. Kang. I've had Taek head to pick those up at the pharmacy right now. Thank you so much for calling," I hang up the phone and let myself fall onto the couch; my emotions hitting me head on. I pull my head up to look at the 7 faces that are looking down at me. The varying range of emotions is incredible.
Namjoon, Seokjin and Yoongi look calm but worried. Hoseok looks like he's seen a ghost, all the color having drained from his face. Taehyung frustrated and confused. Jimin's eyed are wide and glassy, obviously he's emotional and Jungkook... Jungkook is angry; his fists are balled at his sides and his jaw is tense.
"What did she say?" Seokjin says as he kneels in front of me, his hands holding mine.
"They found traces of ethylene glycol in my system. They aren't sure of the severity but because I'm only nauseas and don't have any other, more severe symptoms, she's not too concerned. She prescribed me a few medications that serve as an antidote to flush it out of my system that Taek is picking up and when I get back, I'll have tests done to make sure my renal system and stomach is okay," I tell them.
"What is ethylene glycol?" Taehyung asks.
"It is a common ingredient found in anti-freeze," Yoongi tells him.
"Someone has been giving you anti-freeze?!" Jimin yells.
"This is fucking insane," Namjoon says, not really to anyone specifically, just letting his thoughts leave his mind.
"Who could be doing this?" Jimin adds.
"I mean, at this rate, it could be anyone.I eat and drink from tons of places and Dr. Kang said it's something I've ingested. It could be someone at the coffee shop or cafe at the company," I say.
"Or..." I hear Yoongi start and they all turn and look at him.
"Or what?" I ask.
"Taek?" Yoongi finishes.
"Wait, what?" I say.
"Ae-Cha?" Taehyung adds. I can't believe what they're saying.
"You're kidding me right now," I respond.
"Maybe Kat is involved somehow," Hoseok says. I turn to look at him and I'm at a loss for words.
"Oh, come on..." I say.
"Bang Chan," Jungkook says, finally breaking his silence. Everyone turns to look at him and I feel like I've been slapped in the face. I turn my whole body to face him, in complete awe at what he just said. It's one thing to dislike someone for whatever reason but to accuse them of something like this is too much. His jealousy has gone too far this time.
"No. I can't do this. I can't have this conversation right now. I need a minute," I say as I get up off the couch and turn to walk away. I'm angry. I know that if I don't leave the room, I will lose my temper; I will say things I might not mean and I can't do it. I can't lose control. I can understand why Yoongi would suspect Taek after the events that happened yesterday and his newly discovered relationship with Nabi (although I'm not quite sure he'd go so far as to poison me), but Ae? Kat? Chan? How could they possibly think any of them could be capable of hurting me in that way? They're my friends. Chan is one of my closest friends.
"Eleanor," I hear Jungkook say to me, his voice carrying a warning, hard and demanding and I feel his hand close around my wrist.
"Don't," I shout at him as I rip my hand away and turn back to face him. "Not right now, Jungkook," I say to him. His eyes are narrowed as they burn into mine, the anger obvious.
"Why can't you just—" he starts; raising his voice at me, frustration riddling is face.
"I said not right now, Jungkook. Just— No. I just— I need a minute," I tell him again. I turn back and walk out of the room. I reach my room and close the door behind me. I take a deep breath and try to calm myself down. I go to the closet and start to change, Namjoon and I have to leave here in 30 minutes to go to the airport. I asked Dr. Kang if she thought I'd be okay to travel and she told me that I should be okay. She asked me to guard what I eat and drink very carefully and only take items that are sealed from anyone.
I start rummaging though my closet and get changed. I grab the last of my items and place them in my carry on bag, making sure that my tablet, laptop, headphones and all necessary cables are packed and I hear the doorbell ring, telling me Hyun-Jin and Daehyun must have arrived. We are all taking the same flight; Namjoon sitting next to Hyun-Jin and Taek while Daehyun and I sit across from them.
I hear a soft knock at my door and I stall. I don't even know if I'm ready to talk to anyone yet. I don't have much of a choice since we're leaving either way. I head to the door and open it to see Jimin; my heart softens just at the sight of him.
"Jimin-ah," I let out softly as I pull him into my room and close the door behind him. He looks at me and then reaches his arms out to me. I walk to him and embrace him, letting my chin rest on his shoulder.
"I need you to do something for me," he says. I pull away to look at him and he brings his hands to my face, cupping my jaw and locking his eyes on mine.
"I need you to please, please, be safe and come home to me as soon as possible," he tells me.
"Jimin," I whisper.
"Please, promise me" he says again softly. "I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you," he says.
"I promise," I say to him. He pulls my face into his and kisses me.
"I love you Eleanor. I love you so much," he says.
"I love you too Minnie," I tell him. I hear a knock on the door and Namjoon pokes his head in.
"Ready Sweet Thing?" He asks with a smile. I nod at him as I reach out to grab my backpack and Jimin grabs my suitcase. We walk out together to the living room. As I had predicted, Hyun-Jin and Daehyun are there. Taek will be meeting us at the airport since I tasked him with picking up my prescriptions. I smile at them and see everyone except for Jungkook in the living room.
"El-ssi," I hear Hyun-Jin speaking to me.
"Yes, Hyun-Jin-ssi" I respond.
"Yoongi-ssi has debriefed us on the situation that unraveled today. I'm so sorry that I failed to protect you," he tells me. I look at him and instantly feel so much guilt.
"No. Hyun-Jin," I start. "None of this is your fault. Please do not take the blame," I tell him.
"We will make sure we are more vigilant from now on," he says and I smile at him and bow slightly.
"I trust you, implicitly Hyun-Jin-ssi. Thank you for always taking such good care of me," I respond. He bows and then reaches out to grab my things.
"Eleanor-ssi, my name is Daehyun. It's nice to meet you. I look forward to working with you. Hyun-Jin has given me the details and formalities but please let me know if there is anything else you need from me," he says as he bows at me.
"Thank you Daehyun-ssi. Please, call me El," I say as I bow at him and shake his hand. He grabs my bags and starts to follow Hyun-Jin out with Namjoon's things. Once they've left, I turn around and look at the men standing in front of me.
"We can all talk about this when I get back. Let's just push it aside for now," I tell them.
Namjoon starts saying his goodbyes. He hugs his members and they all tell him to be careful and to take care of me. I start on the far left and hug Hoseok.
"Please be safe. Call me when you wake up and when you go to bed. Don't wander by yourself. Just— please," he says and I kiss him to reassure him that I'll be okay. My hands wrap around his shoulders and I press him tightly against me.
"My sunshine," I whisper into his ear. "I love you," I finish.
"I love you," I hear him respond. I separate from him and make my way down the line, I find myself instantly wrapped in Jimin's arms. I feel his nose burying into my neck and his fingers dig into my hips.
"I'm going to miss you," he says to me. I cup his face in my hands and press my forehead against his.
"I am going to miss you too baby. I will be back soon," I tell him. I kiss him and nudge his nose. He lets me go, reluctantly, and I meet Taehyung's eyes. He grabs my hand and places it on the back of his neck while he wraps the other around me and then he starts rocking us slowly back and forth.
"Come back quickly so you can dance with me," he says to me. I nod into his shoulder and kiss his cheek. He spins me and I land in front of Yoongi. I stand there to see what he's going to do.
"I don't care if you're mad at me. I love you and I'm not letting you leave here without telling me you love me too, " he says stubbornly and I can see the slight sadness in his eyes. He grabs my hand and pulls it up to his mouth, kissing my palm and laying his cheek in my hand.
"I'm not mad at you, I'm frustrated but no amount of frustration could keep me from loving you," I tell him. I lean in and kiss him gently, feeling him sigh against my touch. I step away from him and move on to Seokjin. It takes him no time at all to run his fingers through my hair, settling at the nape of my neck and pulling me forward to kiss me. My heart beats erratically and I try and catch the sigh that pushes through my lips.
"Never leave Daehyun's side. Stay close to Namjoon-ah. Don't eat anything that's not sealed. Stay safe but work hard and enjoy yourself. I'm so proud of you," he says to me, reminding me that this trip is a big deal for me. "I love you, baby girl," he finishes.
"I love you too," I say to him as I hug him and kiss him gently. I let go of him and turn to see Namjoon. He reaches his hand out for me and I grab it. I can't help but feel my heart completely breaking.
Leaving Jungkook this way is not what I wanted. Our personalities are so similar sometimes; we are both stubborn and strong willed. We need time to process; I love him and I know he loves me too but leaving him for 4 days without saying goodbye isn't the way I thought this was going to go.
Namjoon pulls at me slightly as we walk to the door. I turn around one last time and I send them flying kisses and tell them I love them. We walk out the door and I feel like I've been punches in the stomach.
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The flight is quick. I wish I would have been able to sit next to Namjoon but I'm glad I took the time to sit next to Daehyun to learn a little bit more about him. We talk about my job and my life in Seoul. He tells me about his life; he's single and this is his first professional job. His dad was a bodyguard his whole life and is an friend and associate of Hyun-Jin's so he decided to walk in his footsteps. He's a super nice guy and I feel comfortable around him.
Once we land, we are met by our drivers. Namjoon tells Hyun-Jin and Daehyun that he'd like to ride with me and they can ride with Taek. I'm not sure why he's willing to risk it but I trust him and follow his lead. I can't fully hear what he tells Hyun-Jin but he nods and they head to their car and we head to ours. We are pretty inconspicuous; hats, glasses and masks covering our faces and everyone is dressed in casual clothes as to not draw attention. Namjoon opens the car door for me and then walks to the other side and climbs in. Once the door closes, he raises the partition in the car and pulls off his face mask to look at me.
"I don't want you alone with Taek, just to be safe. I know you said you wanted to put this conversation on pause but I can't in good conscious let you be near him when we are questioning his loyalty. And then there is the whole thing with Nabi, there are just too many things happening to make me feel like we shouldn't let our guard down," he says to me. I understand what he means.
"Okay," I tell him. He reaches out to hold my hand. "I feel the same way; just the whole thing with Nabi is making me question everything. The other thing, I haven't quite wrapped my head around yet," I tell him honestly. He smiles at me and then wraps his fingers around my jaw and pulls me to him.
"We just love you. We want to protect you. Do you know how awful I would feel if I knew I willingly let you be in danger?" He asks.
"I know Joon-ah, I know," I say to him. I kiss him and push his long dark hair off of his eyes.
"Okay," he says with a smile. I know he's trying to lighten the mood and I want to as well. I don't want our special trip to be ruined. "So, what's the plan?" He asks.
"Once we get to the hotel, we can split off from the others. They each have rooms. Taek has his own and I was able to get Hyun-Jin a room with a double bed and he said he'd share with Daehyun. They already know they have tonight off and can do whatever they want," I tell him. I hadn't shared any plans with him yet because I wanted it to be a complete surprise.
"Okay," he says with a wink and a smile. I jokingly roll my eyes at him.
"Then you and I are having dinner together," I say to him. I had Sejin help me get a private reservation on the rooftop landing at a restaurant called Narnia. After the results of my bloodwork this morning, Sejin called me to reassure me that we would indeed be safe for us as it is owned by one of his family members. We have the whole rooftop to ourselves; I arranged the menu, the drinks, the music that will be playing, candles, the whole night is planned and I can't wait to have this time with him. Sejin made sure to verify that we would have the ultimate discretion. I packed us each a nice outfit and I'm excited to get dressed up and just be alone with him.
"Dinner huh?" He asks as he leans toward me and pushes my hair behind my shoulder, letting his mouth move against the groove of my neck. I feel him press against me and a shiver runs down my spine.
"Yes, I'm going to wine and dine you. I'm hoping I'll get lucky tonight," I say to him with a breathy laugh as my whole body starts to melt under his touch.
"Oh Sweet Thing, you don't need to wine and dine me to get lucky," he says between open mouthed kisses to my siring hot skin. "I was planning to fuck you all night either way," he whispers and I feel my whole body shake in anticipation. The car comes to a stop and he pulls away from me as the driver comes out and opens the door for us. Hyun-Jin and the others already arrived and checked us in so we are able to go straight upstairs to our room. We find Hyun-Jin, grab our key and head to our room.
We open the door and i'm in awe at the beauty of the suite. I wanted to go all out for this trip for us so I booked us an ocean view room at a resort right on the water. I wanted him to know that I value him, love him, and am so thankful that I get to spend time with him.
"Holy shit," he let's out. "El, this is— perfect," he wraps his arms around my waist and places his chin on the top of my head.
"I am so excited to spend time with you," I say to him as I turn around to face him and throw my arms around his neck.
"I can't wait to have you all to myself," he says as he kisses me; pushing his tongue between my lips and I let out a whine as I feel his hands move down to grab on to my ass as he pushes me to find the bed. As soon as I feel the back of my knees hit the mattress, I pull him down with me and we crash into each other; our heads knocking into each other. We laugh uncontrollably as we rub our heads and I look over at him and am hit with a wave of affection. His eyes sparkling, his hair laying softly on his forehead, his dimples adorning his beautiful face. His beauty takes me breath away.
"I am so in love with you, Namjoon-ah," I tell him as I turn to him. "Stupidly obsessed with every single thing about you," I finish as I let my thumb graze his cheek. I see a slight blush grow on his cheeks and I get butterflies in my stomach.
We spend the next few hours just lounging in bed, watching K-Dramas on tv and enjoying spending time alone. We have our reservation in 2 hours so I tell him I'm going to start getting ready. I head to the bathroom and jump in the shower, taking my time to shave, exfoliate and scrub every inch of my body. I get out and dry myself off, wrap a towel around my body and start blow drying my hair. Just as I'm finishing with my hair, I get a video call from Taehyung's phone. I slide my finger across the screen to answer it. I've only been gone from the house for 6 hours and I already miss them like crazy. The screen flashes and I see them, 5 pieces of my heart. I see that Jungkook is still gone and my heart aches at the loss of his big, beautiful eyes looking at me. They're all squished together on the couch and I can't help but bring my hands to my chest.
"I am the luckiest woman alive," I gush at them and they all smile. "What are you guys doing?" I say as I start working on my skincare and makeup.
"We miss you already," Jimin tells me.
"The house is so quiet without you and Namjoon-ah," Hoseok adds.
"Yeah, there isn't any noise from things being broken and you yelling at him to be careful," Seokjin teases.
"So mean," I respond to him with a smile.
"What are you getting ready for?" Yoongi asks.
"Namjoon and I are going out to dinner," I tell them.
"Will you send us pictures when you're ready?" Tae asks.
"Of course Baby Bear," I respond.
"I love you all so much. I miss you," I tell them.
"We miss you so much. We can't wait until you come home to us," Jimin says excitingly.
"We will let you finish getting dressed, we just wanted to check in to see how you landed," Seokjin tells me. I know they're worried and that's okay.
"Okay," I say softly. "Ummm..." I mumble out, looking down at my hands.
"Noona," Taehyung answers me. "He's okay. He's just— you know how he gets when he's angry," he finishes, knowing exactly what I was going to ask.
"Especially when it involves you. He loses all sense of sanity when it's anything remotely related you," Yoongi adds.
"Will you— will you just make sure that he's eating and resting," I tell them.
"Of course. Don't worry Princess," Hoseok responds.
"Thank you. I'll talk to you guys later. I love you, so much," I tell them. They all shout out their 'I love you's' and pet names and wave and then end the call. I focus on getting my makeup finished and curling my hair.
40 minutes later, my hair is done, my make up is perfected and I head into the bedroom to get changed. Namjoon showered and changed a while ago and is waiting for me in the living area. I let my fingers graze down the silk fabric of the dress I chose for tonight. It's a long, black, fitted dress that hugs every curve of my body. I am quite self-conscious about the way I look in it but decide to throw aside all shreds of self-loathing because I know Joon will lost his mind. I take off my robe and don't bother with undergarments as they'd be visible through the very thin and shiny fabric. The thin straps hug around my shoulders and the front drapes over my chest as the rest hugs the rest of my body; a slit up my right leg that hits right around mid thigh. The back is completely open, scooping right above the lowest part of the small of my back, showing off the tattoo that goes down my spine. I add my simple infinity necklace, a couple set of gold bands on my fingers and spray perfume all over my body. I grab my heels and step into them and give myself one last look in the mirror. I grab my phone, pose in front of the mirror, pushing aside any feelings of embarrassment or shyness as I expose my leg, pop my hip and give the camera a very specific look. I snap it, look at it and decide it's good enough. I turn around, adjust my legs again, and place the phone over as I look over my shoulder, showing off the back of the dress and snap another photo. I open our group chat (the one we are all in) and attach both photos with a simple black heart emoji and press send. Just as the message goes through I walk into the room and I see Namjoon looking down at his phone with his jaw slack.
"What you lookin' at baby?" I ask knowing damn well that he's looking at the photo I just send. I stand with my hand laced in front of me, waiting for a response. He brings his face up, his mouth still hanging open. His eyes rake my body from my toes all the way up until he meets mine. He licks his lips and let's himself fall back on the couch dramatically. He spreads his legs and the look he gives me makes goosebumps scatter all over my skin.
"Fuck," he moans out. "I— fuck," he says again. I can't help but laugh at his reaction.
"Do I look okay?" I ask him as I look down. I can feel my cheeks burning red at the way he's drinking me in. His eyes are black and he looks completely unhinged. He stands up and it gives me a chance to look at him, really look at him and Jesus Christ, he is fucking stunning.
He's wearing fitted black trousers, the fabric tight around his thighs and it makes me want to do obscene, messy things to him. Tucked into the pants is a black silk button up, one I chose purposely so that he matched me. He's buttoned it but stopped right at the base of his chest, so that I can see his beautiful, exposed collarbones and I can not even handle how incredibly sexy he looks. His black hair is slicked back and his lips are a super subtle pink. He stops right in front of me and I feel like my legs are going to give out. I'm overwhelmed by how inexplicably infatuated I am with him. He brings his hand up to my shoulder and lets his fingers graze down my down, my whole body fills with heat; fire engulfing every single neuron.
"It is taking every single ounce of self control not to take you right now," he tells me as his lips hover mine. He catches me off guard by spinning me around so that my back is to his chest. He leans down to place his mouth at the nape of my neck and then I feel him kissing down the entirety of my back, sending goosebumps all over my skin. He reaches the small of my back and then I feel his tongue run all the way back up my spine and my knees buckle and a moan leaves my lips.
"Fuck—" he whines into my ear. I turn back around to face him and ghost my mouth over his.
"Later," I tell him as I press my lips against his. "Wait a little bit longer and I promise, you can have me in whatever way you want," I tell him.
"Damn," he says. I grab his hand and lead us toward the door. We grab our face masks and make our way to the elevator. We have a driver meeting us downstairs at the private parking garage. As soon as the doors open we are greeted by the driver and he opens the car door for us and we climb in as he starts driving us to the restaurant.
Namjoon taps the leather seat next to him and I smile as I scoot over to sit next to him. I cross my leg over, letting the fabric fall off my skin and his hand instantly goes to my thigh. I pull my phone out and can't help but laugh as I look at the responses to my photo.
Hoseok
You're fucking crazy.
Jimin
I can't breathe.
Seokjin
I've never been jealous of Namjoon until right now, in this moment.
Namjoon
I'm definitley living out my wildest dream right now.
I read the message and then turn to look at him, a smirk spread across his face.
Taehyung
Angel, you're the most beautiful person I've ever seen.
Yoongi
I'm drinking in the living room if anyone wants to join me.
Eleanor
Yoongi, why are you drinking?
Yoongi
To numb the pain of having to see how hot you look and not being the one that gets to touch you.
I laugh out loud at his words. I know he's being funny; we always joke about situations like this. I feel Joon's fingers grip my leg and I turn to look at him. He captures my lips in a heated kiss, licking the seam of my lips, asking for permission to completely devour me. I open my mouth and allow his tongue to brush against mine and I feel the butterflies erupt in my stomach and a sigh leaves my mouth.
"God, you're so delicious," he mumbles, his mouth moving down to my neck, his tongue leaving traces of fire against my skin. "I want to devour every single inch of you," he confesses. The car comes to a stop and it's obvious that we've arrived. I feel my phone vibrate in my hand and look down to see a private message from the one person I miss more than anything in this world and I can't help the tears that well in the corners of my eyes.
Jungkook
I love you.
It's simple and easy but it's exactly what I needed and wanted to hear. The validation that no matter how angry we are at each other (and of course, I'm still mad at him, hurt by his actions and words), the love that we have will never go away. I love him; endlessly, genuinely, hopelessly, and unconditionally.
Eleanor
I love you. Forever.
A few moments later, the door is opened and Namjoon climbs out and extends his hand to help me out of the car. I step out and adjust my dress slightly and we are greeted by a girl who tells us she will be leading us to our space. We follow her and she leads us into a private entrance and up the stairs. Once she opens the door to the rooftop, we are flooded by the warm lights, candles, flowers scattered all over, the backdrop of the sunset beginning over the water. It's unbelievable. The table is set up in the center with two chairs, a floral arrangement in the center and an ice bucket with a bottle of champagne. She excuses her self and says our first course will be arriving in a few minutes.
Namjoon takes my hand and we walk to the railing on the edge of the terrace. I place my hands on it and look out at the beautiful scenery as Namjoon stands behind me, his hands caging my body against the railing, his chest pressed against my back and his mouth against my ear as he pushes my hair back. We let the sound of the music streaming though the speakers take us away; my heart flutters as I focus on the lyrics and realize how perfect they are for this very moment.
"Pullin' on my heart,
No, it's not your fault.
I've been searching for you,
I've been waiting for you.
I guess that I found
Another reason I've been holding my smile.
When you're not around,
I could never try to get through to you.
There's a rhythm in what we have,
Slowly dancing, wounds are mending
And I feel your body shaking.
You think my love's unsure?
I'll be the one to judge,
But I'll suffer the fall for love..."
"This is a dream. You're my dream; everything I've ever hoped and wanted," he whispers against my ear. I let out a breath, just taking in the words he's saying to me. After a few moments, just enjoying the view, I turn around to face him.
"When I was a little girl, I dreamed of being saved. I begged for my Prince Charming to come and sweep me away; take me from the pain and the hurt I was experiencing," I tell him as my hands go to his face. "I would pray every single night," I continue. "I didn't realize it would take as long as it did but I'm so thankful that you saved me," I finish.
I get on my tip toes and press my lips against his. He brings his hands up to cup my face as he kisses me.
"I love you so fucking much," he mumbles. Before he can say anything else, we hear the door open and a few men stand near our table with trays with our food. We make our way back to our table and sit down, the servers setting the food in front of us. Namjoon reaches over to the bottle of champagne and pops it open. He serves each glass and as soon as the servers have left, he brings his glass up between us and smiles that beautiful, dimpled smile.
"To us," he says. "The future, family, us, our love. The best moments are yet to come," he says as he clinks his glass against mine.
The dinner was absolutely delicious and we watched the sunset together while we drank our weight in champagne and he tells me stories about their training days and the early years of their careers.
"So you're telling me, that you almost wrote on the chalkboard with a permanent marker?!" I say with a laugh. I can feel my whole body; floating, light and fuzzy, the alcohol filling me with the most incredible feeling of loopiness.
"In my defense, they looked similar!" He replies in a jokingly defensive way. His hand creeps further up my leg, his fingers grazing softly over my skin. I'm too buzzed for this... and turned on.
"Namjoon-ah," I say as I lean forward and kiss him softly.
"예?" He responds.
"You ready for dessert?" I ask him.
"I don't think I could eat anymore if I tried," he tells me as his hands go to my hair, gently tugging on it to pull me closer to him.
"Are you sure?" I ask him.
"What's for dessert?" He asks when he notices my slight pout. I hover my mouth over his, teasing him purposely.
"Me," I respond. I hear him let out a gravely whine as he presses his mouth on mine.
"I'm suddenly starved," he responds with a smirk and pulls me up off the chair and leads me to the door to leave the restaurant.
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We stumble into the hotel room, not breaking our kiss even for a moment, hitting against walls and the table at the entrance of the room; the vase on top rocking and threatening to fall. As soon as the door closes, I hop up and wrap my legs around his waist; feeling insatiable.
"I'll never have enough of you," he mumbles against my mouth as he leads us to the bed. I let out a soft moan when I feel his fingers grasp into my ass, my senses on overdrive. Everything feels better, tastes better, looks better. "Fuck" he whispers as he lays me on the bed and holds himself above me. "For as long as I live, you'll be the only thing I will ever need," he tells me and I feel my heart beating rapidly, his works making me feel like I'm on top of the world. My hands move to the buttons of his shirt as i undo them and pull it out of his pants.
"Joon-ah," I whine, pulling his shirt off his shoulders. He lifts himself off and lets me pull his shirt off completely and throw it aside.
"What does my Sweet Thing want?" He asks me. My hands move to his pants; I loosen his belt, unbuckle them and start pulling them down his hips. He stands up, facing me so that he can pull them all the way down and he's left in his underwear. My eyes devour the sight before me; he's absolutely gorgeous. His chest is firm and toned, his skin golden and beautiful; every single thing about him perfect in every way.
"Wanna make you feel good," I tell him, my hand running down his chest, his stomach and stops as soon as I reach the bulge that's prominent in his boxer briefs. His head rolls back as my fingers grasp around him and I start to stoke him languidly, keeping a firm grasp on him. I let my thumb slide over his tip and I hear him let out a low, raspy moan.
"Good, Joonie?" I ask him as I push against his body, my hand continuing it's work on his length. The silk of my dress slides against his skin; a reminder that I'm still fully dressed.
"So good baby," he let's out and I let my mouth kiss down his neck, his chest, leaving bright red lipstick marks all over his immaculate skin. "Making me feel so fucking good, Sweet Thing," he continues and I let myself shift off the bed, standing in front of him and I push him back on the bed. He falls back and I let my hands run up his thighs. My mouth follows as I kiss up his legs, taking my time to let my tongue linger against him. By the time I've reached my destination, he's writhing beneath me; his hips bucking up to meet my mouth, begging for my touch. Seeing him like this makes me feel so powerful, like I've bent him to my will and he will do anything I say. It's not often I'm allowed the absolute privilege that is submissive Namjoon. I place my hands on his hips, pushing him against the bed to hold him down and let my tongue lick his tip before I take him fully in my mouth.
"Fuck," he whines out. I continue to work my hand at his base and my mouth on the rest of his length. I look up to see his hands balled into fits on either side of his legs and I reach up to grab one and place it on the back of my head, letting him know what I want him to do. He looks down at me with wide eyes, unsure if he's understanding. I pull my mouth off of him slowly until I pop off, my tongue licking his tip as he hisses with pleasure.
"Do it," I tell him.
"Are you sure?" He asks, his thumb coming to stoke my cheek.
"Use me," I say and I hear him let out a low moan.
"Pinch me if you want me to stop," he tells me. I smile at him and nod. He laces his fingers in my hair with one hand, grabs himself with the other, and pulls me to brush himself against my lips. I open my mouth and allow him to push himself into me. I relax my jaw and mentally prepare myself.
He starts off slow, softly thrusting into me, his eyes screwed shut as he gets lost in his arousal. It doesn't take long for him to start moving faster, chasing his pleasure. He thrusts harder until I feel him hit the back of my throat, a deep whine from me vibrates against his length and I hear him let out a strangled curse.
"God damn," I hear him shout. I feel tears start to fall from my eyes as he starts moving faster, chasing his climax, thrusting deeper and deeper into my mouth, his movements becoming erratic and sloppy.
My jaw is sore and my throat burns but watching him drowning in pleasure is so infinitely satisfying that I don't care what I feel like. I get off on watching him, pushing my thighs together to try and dull the throbbing arousal in between my own legs; refusing to let myself finish until I have him inside of me. He pushes into me and then pushes my head down and holds it there for a few moments, his eyes rolling to the back of his head.
"Shit," he moans as he lets go of my head and pulls my hair back, his fingers still tangled in the strands. "I'm going to come," he tells me as he sits himself up. I look up at him through my lashes and open my mouth and stick my tongue out at him, letting him know exactly what I want from him.
"Fuck," he says as looks down at me, stroking himself impossibly fast. He moves himself forward so that he's jerking himself right above my lips and I can tell he's sitting right at the brink of his climax. I bring my eyes back up to him.
"Please Daddy," I say sweetly and the moment the words leave my mouth, he brings his other hand up to my jaw and holds it steady as he comes onto my tongue and lips. It takes every single ounce of self control to not let myself reach my own peak as I watch him bite down on his lip, completely lost in pleasure. It's single handedly the most erotic and beautiful sight I've ever seen in my life. Once he's worked his way down from his climax, he let's go of me and watches as I lick my lips, cleaning him off of me and then throws himself back on the bed. I climb up his body, pulling my dress, up over my thighs so that I can straddle him.
"That mouth of yours," he lets out. "You're my fucking weakness," he continues and I laugh. "Seriously, I've never experienced anything this good before you," he continues.
"And you won't ever again because I'm never letting you even think about touching someone else for the rest of your life," I tell him. "You're mine," I warn him. His hands come up to the fabric bunched on my hips.
"You look so beautiful tonight Sweet Thing," he tells me as he sits up and adjusts me on his lap. "You ARE so beautiful always," he mumbles against my ear as he pushes hair back and his lips land on the sensitive skin of my neck.
"Thank you baby," I exhale as I lose myself in the feeling of his mouth leaving trails of fire on my skin. I feel his hands move to the thin straps of my dress as he pulls them down, his mouth following his fingers down my arm. As soon as he pulls the straps down my arms, his mouth is on my chest, his tongue laps at my nipples, biting down gently, his hands kneading my skin. I feel my whole body tremble as he continues his work on my body. He wraps his arm around my waist and turns us so that I'm laying on the bed and he's hovering over me.
"Ella," he whispers against my lips.
"Mmmm," I let out as my hands pull on his hair, bringing him close to me.
"I love you so much baby," he tells me and my heart skips a beat. If only I had words big enough; if only I was eloquent with my words, but I'm not. His hands grab the fabric of my dress and he pulls it off the rest of my body, throwing it aside and leaving me completely bare in front of him.
"I can't—" I stammer out as his mouth moves up my legs, leaving marks along the way. "I don't—" I try again. He reaches the inside of my thigh and sucks on my skin, marking me one final time.
"I don't have words Joon," I finish as he brings his face up to mine. "I love you more than love," I tell him. He kisses me deeply, his tongue pushing against mine. He feels like water and I've been in the desert for too long. My whole body longs for him; I want him so badly that it's embarrassing.
I feel his hips push against me and before I can even revel in how much I need him inside me, I feel him push in, pressing against my walls and stretching me in a way that's so deliriously mindblowing that the only thing I can do is moan out in pleasure. My finger nails rake down his back, a hiss leaving his mouth as my whole body tries to comprehend how to react to the immense bliss I'm feeling.
"Fuck. Always so tight for me Sweet Thing," he moans against my ear as he rocks his hips forward, filling me so deeply.
"Mmm," I moan out between breathless pants, incapable of forming any semblance of a coherent sentence or thought beyond the realm of pleasure that I'm engrossed in. His hand moves it's way down my body until he reaches my knee. He grabs it, pulls it toward me and lets my leg lay over his shoulder as he starts thrusting into me erratically; groans of gratification falling from his mouth into the air.
We go on like this for a while, lost in each other; making each other feel as good as we can. Indulging in our time alone, not having to worry about work or other obligations. Being free in time and space and in one another, for the first time ever. He whispers declarations of love while he pleasures me in ways that I can only delineate as heavenly, seraphic and divine. The juxtaposition of his movement is enigmatic; The softness of his fingers tangling in my hair is a direct contradiction to his hips slamming rhythmically against mine, creating a tempo between our bodies thats so indescribably seductive, so frenzied and wild that I feel my whole body tense in the suspense of my oncoming release.
"Oh my god," I say as he grunts in my ear in desperation. I feel like I'm about to combust, completely catch on fire.
"That's it baby," he praises me. He knows exactly what he's doing; knows just what to say to make sure I succumb to him. I feel myself clench around him, arousal that's pooled in my belly too intense to hold back any longer.
"Eleanor?" He says sweetly as he starts to lose his rhythm, his own arousal too much for him to deny. I nod into his neck, letting my lips catch the beads of sweat that are rolling down his skin. "Be a good girl and come for me baby," and as if on command, the tension I've been hold on to, completely dissipates and all that's left is a high that's so intense that I feel the world around me disappear.
"So beautiful," I hear him say as he lets go and releases inside of me. In that moment, there is no one else but him. Kim Namjoon, the strong, beautiful, warmhearted, man that has completely taken over my heart. I feel my chest tighten, a sense of fear and anxiety, at the mere thought of my life without him; I can't and won't be with out him. He pulls himself out of me and lays down next to me, pulling me into his body, the warmth he's exuding lulling me into the safety of his touch.
"Ella," I hear him whisper. He reaches his hand out for mine, raising it above us and tangling our fingers together as he watches the way our hands seemingly fit together perfectly; his larger one, encompassing my smaller one.
"Hmm?" I respond, still coming down from my high.
"Do you really want to go to Kat's wedding?" He asks. I turn my head to look at him.
"Honestly?" I ask him. I see him nod.
"I did. I did want to go. But I think my reasoning for going had nothing to do with Kat and her getting married and everything to do with the fact that I was looking forward to introducing one of you as my boyfriend," I tell him honestly.
"It's hard because I know that our situation is difficult. The majority of people won't accept us and I've come to terms with that. But you guys have your families, your friends and you've all started to introduce me to those that you each care about the most and I..." I tell him as he rolls over and holds himself up on his elbow, looking at me in a way that feels so warm and so comforting. His other hand goes to my hair, where he's gently twirling the strands between his fingers.
"I don't have anyone. I don't have a mother or father to talk to you all about. I don't have any siblings or cousins, and the only real person that I have is Kat. She's it for me; the closest to a sister that I will ever have. So, telling her and introducing her, being able to say the words out loud, it was something I was really wanting to do," I tell him. His eyes are soft and I can see the sadness brimming in them.
"I am not telling you this to make you feel bad. I love my relationships and I would do this all a million times over if I had to. I just wish I could shout it from the rooftops how much I love you, that's all," I finish.
"I wish we could too. I would tell everyone, you know that, right?" He tells me as his thumb strokes my cheek. "I want everyone to know that you are the love of my life. That I've never been as happy as I am now and that even though I've found you and loved you in this lifetime, I will find you and choose you in any and all lifetimes to come because you're my soul mate," he tells me. I feel my eyes start to well and I scold myself at my inability to keep my emotions at bay.
"You're going to make me cry," I say as his thumb pats the corner of my eye to collect the tears that start to roll down my cheek. "I don't know why I'm so damn emotional recently," I tell him.
"You've been through a lot recently, it's okay to be emotional," he reassures me. I scoot closer to him and let my arm drape over his neck.
"I love you Namjoon-ah" I whisper to him as I let my lips find his in a soft and chaste kiss. I let my fingers comb through his hair gently and after several minutes, I notice his eyes start to flutter shut, his exhaustion winning the battle. I follow suite and let my eyes close, feeling the most confusion mixture of sadness and happiness all at the same time; these damn emotions getting the best of me yet again.