I would never admit it to the others, but I felt like Jake abandoned me. Or he was at least avoiding me because of our last conversation. Meanwhile, thousands of people were viewing Lilly's video. They were texting me ignorant and cruel messages, and who knows what they were saying to Jake--if they could even get in touch with him. He probably had ways of blocking unknown numbers and was just happily hacking away somewhere.
But either way, he was gone, and I was starting to wonder if Dan was right. This was the second time that Jake had left me to deal with the consequences of his desire to keep the others in the dark about our investigation, and this time, it was putting my livelihood and maybe my safety in jeopardy.
Now, possibly because I had almost asked him if he had feelings for me, he had gone offline and wasn't paying attention to the fact that we were both in danger. This wasn't good behavior for someone that asked them to trust you blindly. I usually gave people the benefit of the doubt, but this was a lot.
Meanwhile, the others tried to find a way to help me, but we didn't come up with anything. I couldn't even be that mad at Lilly. She was just a misguided, scared little girl who thought she was doing what she needed to do to get her sister back. I didn't condone her actions in any way, but I could remember a time several years back when I might have behaved similarly before I decided that I needed to grow up and start adulting.
Richy came into the Legends chat to cheer me up, telling me about his visit with Alfie and Grey. It was really sweet. At least, we were able to get past our previous awkward stage and come to an understanding that we were going to try to be friends. Then Jessy cracked me up by outing him about how things really turned out with Alfie, which was a heartwarming example of how hard Richy tried to make an upset little boy feel better. This guy was just too good. I hoped things got better for him; I would have to see if I could help him somehow, but in a way that didn't make him feel like he was getting charity.
Finally, Jake came back. All he said was "Hello Li." I made a face at him.
"What happened?"
"Just take a look in the group chat," I said. I was not in the mood to give him a rundown; he knew how to read, didn't he? "That's not good," was his response when he came back. I said nothing. "I am going to take care of it," he told me.
"Please hurry. I am going to let the others know."
I told them, and a few moments later, Thomas said the video was taken down, and Dan immediately assumed that Jake threatened Lilly to get it done. I didn't know how he had "taken care of it," but I didn't believe it was by threatening her. I was already annoyed, and Dan seemed like a good target for my frustration. At the end of our argument, Dan said, "I really only have your best interests at heart, Li."
My anger deflated. "I know." I believed that about him. In his own way, Dan was showing that he cared.
But I didn't believe his assertion that Jake was behind Hannah's disappearance. Even if I was mad at him right now, I knew Jake wasn't accosting me in alleyways or dragging off Hannah and then pretending to witness her kidnapping. It just didn't fit with the rest of his behavior.
The only good thing resulting from Lilly releasing the video was that it caused Jake to have an honest conversation with me about things that he'd kept from me previously. He admitted to me that he was wanted by the government, but didn't tell me before because he was afraid I'd stop trusting him.
It frustrated me because it was such an illogical choice for him, and therefore out of character. But I was also starting to see a pattern here. He would make bad, possibly emotional choices revolving around pushing the boundaries of my trust. It made me sad for him, too, because he said that I gave him hope. Here I was, surrounded by a family that loved me, friends I could count on, and even fans, who were strangers, but they still uplifted me when they liked the music that I worked so hard to create. Meanwhile, he had only me to support him. At that thought, my anger faded away.
He said he would have to leave me to continue following leads alone, and I didn't want him to worry, so I said "You know I've got this." Even though I was a little worried myself.
Actually, I was a lot worried, about a lot of things. Even with the video down, I wasn't sure how it would affect my career, my family, and Jake. I was worried that I wouldn't do a good job without him, too. He was way smarter than me. I was a musician, not an investigator. He even had to remind me what our last clue was, I had gotten so far off-track with everything else going on.
But we ended our talk on amicable terms. I hoped he would be OK. I tried not to be confused about his departure and how I might miss him. That was information I kept to myself.
Next, I fulfilled my task of working on the "Jennifer" lead from the recording of Hannah and Dr. Barret. Jake said to pick someone I trust to ask if they knew anything about this mysterious Jennifer. I trusted several people in the group to tell me the truth, but I chose Richy. He told me about a girl who was found dead in the forest over ten years ago, and her killer was never found. At the end of our conversation, he wanted to know why I asked him, of all people. "I like you," I said simply. "But you already knew that, didn't you?"
Richy responded, "I like you, too, Li. A lot." I smiled. I felt like a weight was lifted off of my chest; for all of these years, I thought that my feelings hadn't been reciprocated.
Then he and I, along with Jessy, had a little chat together. I confessed to them that I'd been receiving threatening phone calls--something I hadn't mentioned to Richy when I'd seen him. Jessy brought up an interesting but disheartening theory--that because the calls had started after I joined the group, she believed it was someone from the group who was calling me. I thought about that; when the kidnapper had sent the video of Cleo to me, how had he known that I didn't tell the others? Or was he always planning on sending it to everyone regardless of whether I told them or not? I was afraid that was an indication that there might be a mole in our group, if not the kidnapper himself.
Richy said that we should ask everyone if they'd given out my phone number to anyone. I hoped he was right; I couldn't bear the thought of any of my friends doing such a terrible thing.
My phone rang. Another blocked number. I declined the call; it started ringing again. I answered hesitantly, knowing for sure that Jake wouldn't know I was getting a call this time, so I had to keep a record of it. I hit record when I answered, but all I got was Trust Fall by Bebe Rexha for my troubles.
I hung up without saying a word. I needed to talk to someone, and Jake was not available. I bit my lip; Richy said that he was working when we finished our conversation; I didn't want to bother him or seem clingy after his confession, so I texted Jessy.
Li: I don't want to disturb you, but you said to let you know if anything else happened.
Jessy: You're not disturbing me! But why aren't you putting this in the Legends chat so Richy can see it, too?
Ugh. I didn't want to tell her about my conversation with Richy. Our admissions of feelings didn't change anything; he still had too much going on to even consider a relationship. Besides, I lived three hours away, and I had promised Dari that I would focus on my career.
Jessy: Li? Is there something you want to tell me about you and Richy?
Li: Why, did he say something?
Jessy: 🙄 It's pretty obvious that you like him. And I can tell that he likes you, too.
Li: 😳
Jessy: I know it must feel like bad timing with everything, but you both deserve to have happiness. You shouldn't feel guilty about that.
Li: Well, thank you, I appreciate it. However, nothing is going to happen between us.
Jessy: Why not? ☹️
Li: It's just too complicated right now. For both of us.
Jessy: Is it because of Jake? He likes you too, doesn't he?
Li: What?! No, he doesn't. We're just friends.
Jessy: Yeah, right. Either Jake has feelings for you or he's trying to frame you. Those are the only two reasons I can think of for him threatening the group to keep you with us.
Li: He didn't threaten anybody, and he's not trying to frame me! Anyway, let's move on from this. I texted you for a different reason.
Jessy: OK, hold on.
To my frustration, Jessy went into the Legends chat.
Jessy: Richy, come online, please. Li needs us, she has something important to say.
Richy: I'm here. What happened?
In our private chat, Jessy said to me, "Do you see how quickly he came running when I said you needed him? 😉" I rolled my eyes and didn't reply.
Richy: Li? Are you OK?
Li: Ugh, I'm fine. Besides the threatening phone calls and the thing that happened in the alley, I also get calls where somebody plays a song for me and doesn't say anything. I just got another one now, and I'm not sure what to do about it.
Jessy: What thing happened in the alley?? 😮
Oops. I was so frazzled that I'd forgotten that only Richy knew about the alley.
Richy sent me a private message this time. "You can trust Jessy, Li. She won't say anything to the others if you ask her not to."
I said to Richy, "OK...I guess it's time then." I switched back to our Legends chat and filled Jessy in on the details. She was upset, to say the least.
Jessy: Li, I have to ask...are you sure that this isn't Jake?
Li: No! He would never do that!
Richy: I have to agree with Li. I think that it's very unlikely that Jake is the kidnapper. He's a strange guy, but he seems to want to help.
Jessy: Of course, you two are agreeing again. 🙄
Richy: What is that supposed to mean? 😑
Jessy: Oh, will you just ask her out already?
Li: Jessy!! 😤
Richy: 😳
"Li, the video is down!" Dari exclaimed, barging into my room without knocking, as usual. For once, I was grateful.
Li: I've gotta go, guys, my sister's here.
Jessy: Bye! 🤭
"Yes, I know," I told Dari, setting down my phone. "How are the channels doing?"
"Well, it's good and bad. For one thing, viewership is way up. You have way more people commenting on your accounts and a lot more followers. Many people have sprung to your defense, while others are still accusing you and spreading around bad information. Either way, it's brought a lot of attention to your profiles, and that's generally considered a good thing."
I sighed. You can never really delete anything from the internet. "Do I need to do anything?"
"I'm not sure yet. People are asking you to speak up, but I'd like to wait a bit longer to see how this plays out. Just in case, do you think these people from Duskwood would be willing to step up and say that you're innocent?"
"I don't know. Probably some of them would, but for sure others, like Lilly, still have their doubts."
"OK. Well, maybe talk to them about it, feel them out."
"Most of them don't know about me, Dari."
"What do you mean, what don't they know about you?" she asked.
"I haven't mentioned that I'm a musician. Only Richy knows, and now Jessy. Well, and Jake knows, but he can't exactly go on video supporting me."
Dari scrutinized me. "Tell me about Jake."
I threw my hands up. "There's nothing to tell. I don't know anything about him, other than his first name and that he wants to save Hannah."
"Right. OK, we'll circle back to this conversation at a later date, then."
"Fine. I'm gonna go over to the farm."
Dari smiled approvingly. "Good job. Oh, one more thing. I think we should stay here for a while. I know our building is secure, but people on the internet seem to know where you live in Colville, so it might be safer here."
I shrugged. "OK with me."
I drove over to the farm and walked into the house. "Lola? It's Li."
"Sweeties! How are you?" My Lola gave me her cheek for a kiss.
"I'm OK," I said with a small smile for her.
She gave me a look that said she knew it wasn't true. But unlike Dari, Lola didn't try to get into my business all the time. "Did you come to work in the barn?"
"Yes, but I thought I might go with Lolo Pops if he's out today."
"Really? You haven't gone in a long time. Well, he's definitely still down there, so maybe you can find him."
"Thanks, Lola. See you later."
The exercise did me good, and it cleared my head enough to get some work done. Then Jake came back, and I was happy to hear from him. He seemed OK. He gave me the phone log, and Richy's garage was the first number I called. Jessy answered the phone.
"Hey, Li! What's up?"
"Hi! So I'm working on Hannah's call log, and the first number to come up is the garage. Do you know why Hannah was called?"
"Hmm, her car was here for something, so Richy probably called her to pick it up when it was finished," Jessy replied.
"Oh, do you know what was wrong with her car?"
"That's Richy's department. Hold on. Richy!" she yelled, with the phone away from her ear. I heard him shout back to her, and I smiled, imagining them yelling at each other across the building. "Do you remember why Hannah's car was here last time? Your girlfriend is asking," she said, giggling. I facepalmed. Girlfriend?? She was killing me right now. "Richy says he'll call you back," Jessy said with a smile in her voice.
"Um, thanks?" I said sarcastically, completely flustered.
She giggled. "You're welcome. Talk to you later!"
I sighed and hung up, then went to take a quick shower in the bathroom in the barn. I changed into clean clothes and went across to the main house. I was just about to go inside when Richy called me back. I stopped and sat on the porch swing outside.
"Hi," I said, suddenly shy.
"Hey," he replied, sounding equally awkward. This was our first time talking on the phone. "Jessy said you had some questions?"
"Yeah, the garage's number was on Hannah's call log, and I was just wondering why she brought her car in?"
"Oh, sure. There was a crack in her oil pan."
"Did it look like somebody tampered with it?"
"Nah. She probably just hit a pothole too hard. I didn't ask her about it, though."
"I see. When did she pick the car up?"
"The day that she disappeared, actually."
I wasn't expecting that at all. "Oh, wow! So you may have been the last person to see her?"
"It's possible. We got the notification from the hacker, I mean Jake, shortly after that."
"How did she seem to you that day? Was anything strange about her behavior? Did she tell you where she was going after your shop?"
"No, she seemed normal to me. She didn't say what she was doing afterward, and I didn't think to ask. Now, I wish I had. I'm sorry."
"It wouldn't be a normal thing for you to ask anyway. You didn't do anything wrong. Alright then, I guess that was all the questions I had. Thanks for taking the time."
"No problem...hey, Li?"
I had lost my nervousness during the conversation, but now my heart rate picked up again.
"Yes, Richy?"
"Are you still staying with your parents in Alton?"
"Yes; actually, Dari wants to stay here for a while because she said people know the address of the loft, so she thinks it's safer here."
"That's great! I mean, not that people are lurking around your loft." We both laughed. "I meant, that you're closer to Duskwood for a while. So, does that mean you might have some time to talk? In person, I mean."
I smiled, feeling my face get red. "Sure! What did you have in mind?"
"Well, I know it's short notice, but if you're free tonight, we could maybe go to dinner?"
"That sounds nice."
"That's--I'm really happy you said yes. I think I'm about three years overdue for asking you this."
"Haha. I guess so," I was blushing so hard right now.
"Can I come to pick you up? Is there a restaurant in Alton that you like?"
"Actually, I'm on my grandparents' farm right now, and it's only about 20 minutes from Duskwood. Do you want to go somewhere in town?"
"Um, well, we could go to the Rainbow Cafe. But I think you know by now how things are around here. People could recognize you and harass you. Also, it will get around to the rest of the group that we went out alone together. Are you ready for that?"
"Aw, Richy. I appreciate your concern. But I'll be OK. Are you OK if the others know we went out?"
He laughed. "Hell, yeah. I hope they all find out."
I giggled. "OK then. Let's do it."
We made plans to meet in 45 minutes. Luckily, I had extra clothes at the farm, so I changed out of the shorts and tank top I'd been wearing and wore a simple sundress instead. When I got to the cafe, Richy was standing out front. His hair looked like he'd styled it differently, and he was wearing dark-wash jeans and an Evanescence T-shirt. He still had some stubble on his face, which looked cute. "Hey there," he said with a big grin on his face. He gave me a quick hug and then offered me his arm.
"Well, thank you, kind sir," I placed my hand in the crook of his elbow and he led us to a table on the patio, where he even pulled out my chair for me. A server came out and handed us menus. I stared blankly at mine, not really reading it, and also kept glancing up at Richy. I noticed him rubbing the back of his neck; I hid my smile behind the menu. It seemed like a nervous habit and it was really cute.
"So, um..." Redness crept up Richy's neck and his ears. "How are you?"
"I'm doing fine," I smiled. "How are you?"
"I am...OK," he said, looking flustered.
"Hey, Richy? It's just me. You don't need to try to impress me, OK? We've talked lots of times before."
He took a deep breath and blew it out. "You're right. So, are you really doing OK? Have you gotten any more music grams?"
I laughed. "No, thank goodness."
"Well, that's good. But on the other hand, if you're not being threatened then I'm back to not having anybody to share the clubhouse with."
I snickered. "Jessy would be so mad at your jokes right now."
"That's why you and I get along. We have the same morbid sense of humor," Richy put in.
"True. But seriously, I actually wanted to talk to you about something. I hope you don't mind, but, I need your help."
"Of course, what do you need?"
"Well. I was thinking that I should record some duets, and I could really use a baritone voice to counter me..."
Richy's eyes widened. "Seriously? But, you've never even heard me sing before."
"Well, that's easy to fix. Maybe you can come to my studio this weekend? And if it works out, I'd split any profits from the songs and videos with you, of course."
Richy's eyes narrowed. "Wait," he said slowly. "Are you trying to help me with money?"
"You'd be helping me, too! Plus, you told me you always wanted to perform." When he didn't say anything, I worried I'd messed things up. But then he reached across the table and took my hand.
"Thank you, Li. I really appreciate this."
I was so excited that I jumped up from the table and went around to hug him. "Yay!"
After that, we relaxed and just had a good time. When we were finished with dinner, Richy walked me to my car. "I'll call you tomorrow to set up a time to come by, OK?" He gave me a kiss on the cheek and then a long hug.
When I got home, Jake texted me. He had disappeared for a while; I had been worried that he had to leave again. He said that one of his numbers on the call log was Thomas, and asked me to check in with him about what happened on the call. Then he said he had to go again, and apologized for leaving me to do all the work. I told him it would not be a problem for me.
I thought about how sad it would make me that he was gone again. We'd had our rough patches, but I genuinely liked him. I hadn't said anything last time, but maybe I should now. What the heck? You only live once, right? "I miss you," I told him.
"I miss you too, Li. More than I can explain." Jake logged off.
Well, crap. That was more than a friendly, "Hey, I miss you, bud," type of response. And I was happier about it than in just a friendly way. What was I doing? I liked Richy. He was sweet, funny, and always trying to help everyone. But something about Jake drew me in, too. He was serious, focused, and guarded. How could I be interested in two such different people at the same time?
I shook my head to push those thoughts away. Time to talk to Thomas. It went surprisingly well; he even sent me a picture of the bracelet he'd found at Hannah's place. I still felt he was hiding something from me, but didn't think it would do any good to try to force it out of him. That guy could clam up and act suspicious with the best of them, despite me thinking he was probably completely innocent. He told me he suspected Jake's initials were J.H. as they were on the bracelet and wanted me to see if I could find out his last name. "I don't think he'll tell me," I replied.
Not only did I doubt Jake would tell me his last name, but I also immediately rejected the idea of the bracelet being a gift from Jake. He wouldn't have me pursue it as a lead if it pointed at him. That was just a waste of precious time and too big a risk if he was actually the kidnapper.
In the morning, I sent Jake a string of texts summarizing my conversation with Thomas the previous evening, keeping out Thomas' accusation that Jake was Hannah's lover. There was no need to include baseless accusations in our conversation.
Then Jessy called me. She didn't waste any time with pleasantries. "So, I heard that a certain boss of mine had a date last night with a girl with long black hair. Could it be anyone I know?"
"Well, Richy was right. The Duskwood rumor mill wasted no time whatsoever," I commented.
"That's what you get for having your first date in Duskwood, silly! If you wanted to keep it a secret, you should have picked anywhere else."
"I don't even know that I would call it a date, Jessy. He just asked me if we could meet and talk, that's all."
"Uh-huh. Did he walk you to your car?"
"Yes, but that's just the gentlemanly thing to do," I replied.
"Did he give you a kiss?"
"Only on the cheek!" I defended.
Jessy huffed in frustration. "Li, why are you fighting this so hard? Richy is a wonderful person. Don't you want to be with him?"
I was silent. How did I answer that question?
"Is this about Jake?" I didn't say anything again. "Look, I know I've said I don't trust him, but I trust you. And if you say that Jake doesn't mean any harm, then I'm going to try to believe that. Now, will you please tell me what's happening?"
"What's happening is that I'm confused!" I blurted. "Richy is great. He was all I thought about for three years, but then he ghosted me. And it was more than once."
"Wait, what? How did I not know this?" I told Jessy the whole story--or, as much of it as I remembered, anyway.
"What a jerk!" she cried. "No wonder you're hesitant to give him a chance."
"No, Jessy, please don't be mad at him for my sake. You know how much he has going on. I don't blame him."
"But that's no excuse for being so rude! How can you trust him to not do something like that again?"
"I don't know," I said, pondering. "I guess I didn't realize until now that it was still a problem for me. I thought I had gotten over it, but maybe I haven't."
"Nobody could blame you if you didn't. Look, I love Richy like a brother, and he's one of my closest friends. But that kind of erratic behavior doesn't make for good boyfriend material. If I had known about this, I never would have tried to push you two together." She paused. "Now, do you want to talk about Jake?"
"I'm just as confused about him," I confessed with a cringe. "He has never led me on in any way. But at the same time, he seems like maybe he's just a tiny bit into me, and it peeks through his armor every once in a while."
"What has he said?"
"Well, for one thing, he implied he felt an instant connection to me. He also acted weird about that creepy guy kissing me in the alley, like maybe it made him jealous. He said that I gave him hope, and just last night he told me that he missed me more than he can explain."
"Wow. Well, that gives me an entirely different perspective on why he disrupted the vote against you and got the video taken down. He was doing those things to protect you, wasn't he?"
"Maybe," I responded contemplatively. "I hadn't really thought of it that way before. I thought he was just doing it because he feels like he needs my help to find Hannah."
"But, Li...don't take this the wrong way, OK? He's this computer genius and you're a musician. I'm pretty sure he could manage without you. Isn't it more likely that just he wants you around because he's gotten attached to you?"
I had a similar thought previously, that Jake didn't really need the help of someone with my skill set, or lack thereof. "Jessy, you sure are giving me a lot of insight this morning. I really have to thank you."
"I'm glad to help. But the question is, what are you going to do? Who will you choose?"
"It's a good thing that nobody is asking me to choose right now because I don't know the answer to that question."
She giggled. "Poor you, having two guys interested in you at the same time."
"It's all because the dairy cows are trying to take over the world," I told her as seriously as I could.
"Moo!" she responded, and we both burst out laughing.
"Thanks for calling, girl," I said.
"No problem. You know you can talk to me anytime. Ooh, here comes the boss, gotta go!"
I laughed and said goodbye. The mirth faded a bit after we hung up, though. I was still quite confused. And even though neither of them had tried to push forward a relationship, it still felt like I was being torn in two directions. I would have to get this figured out, and soon.