Teegan
I know my mom isn't exactly comfortable with the idea, but she sits beside me as I make the call to the airport and confirm there's a flight on Wednesday morning, back to Seattle. Thankfully, they let me transfer my flight with only a bit of a fee. My mom agrees to pay it, even.
When I end the call, somehow she's smiling at me.
"The day you got here? When I was having that barbeque with all the neighbors and stuff?" she says, waiting for me to nod. "I was so afraid you'd decide you didn't want to stay more than a week."
"It was iffy there for a few days," I say, but then force a laugh. "But honestly... this summer has changed my life. My perspective. I didn't know you wanted me to live here, all those years ago, Mom."
"I figured your dad never told you. That doesn't matter, though. I know you were raised well and taken good care of." She pauses and cracks her knuckles, something she does when she's nervous.
"Yeah. I was. And now I have the chance to really have you guys in my life," I tell her. Tears are forming and it won't take long until they are here.
"From New York, right? Teeg, you're still going to New York." She looks worried as she says this.
I swallow hard and nod. "I am. Of course. But things feel to up in the air with Cohen, and Rex..."
"I'm not mad you're staying an extra few days," she admits. "I just really hope Rex is okay."
"Me, too."
It's Sunday evening when I text Cohen again.
Hey. I need to talk to you. Can you call me?
I see it's read about half an hour later but he doesn't reply and he doesn't call me. I read some books to Oscar and Josie. I help with their baths and put them to bed, after I told them I'm staying a few extra days.
I lay awake until 3A.M. wondering if I made a mistake. If Cohen can just ignore me this much now, why am I changing my life around for him? He's going through something hard, I know that. If it were my best friend, I'd probably act the same.
At 7A.M. Monday morning, I try again.
Cohen, I'm not leaving today. I changed my flight to Wednesday. I'm here if you need me.
I don't know what else I can do. He's seeing my texts and ignoring me.
I work at the Hut that day, because it's supposed to be Cohen's shift and I'm here anyway. After I am done the shift, I walk down to his house. I knock on the door and wait. No one answers. I go around to the back and look in the window, where I can see the kitchen. It's empty. There's no one there. It doesn't seem like he's been here at all since Friday night when we left to drive to Santa Maria. As I walk home, my heart beating too fast, I hear a car coming up behind me. Glancing over, I notice that it's slowing down.
It's a white truck that I sort of recognize, actually, and the window is down.
"Teegan," Luke says, his face as serious as ever. "Hey."
"Oh, hi." I don't look him in the eye because I'm too afraid. What if he knows more than I do?
"Have you been to see Rex? Shit, I think I'm still in shock about it," he goes on, and then runs a hand through his hair. "Cohen hasn't left the hospital."
I nod, because I assumed that was true. "I took him there, on Friday night."
"God, he's a mess. I was there yesterday, after I talked to Mrs. Rexton-" Luke stops suddenly and his fingers are drumming the steering wheel. "Fuck, Teegan. Rex was not drinking and the party was getting pretty wild and he decided he wanted to leave. Some Avila kids said they'd take him, and Isaac was in the car, so I thought Rex would be fine."
"How was... was everyone else okay?" I ask, because I haven't been able to ask any questions about the accident yet.
Luke breathes out heavily. "Isaac just had some cuts, one of the girls too. The girl, Riss, that was driving was fine. Rex was in the back seat and on the side the car was hit-"
I shut my eyes and try to force myself to breathe. "Oh my god."
"He's going to be okay. He has to be. Wait, haven't you talked to Cohen?" Luke looks confused, suddenly.
I'm embarrassed and mad and I don't know what to say. "He texted me a few times. Said Rex is in a coma."
Luke just nods. "Cohen is... a wreck. I'm just heading home and working tomorrow. Let me know if you need anything?"
I nod and force a smile. "Thanks. I'm actually leaving on Wednesday."
"Leaving?" Luke looks confused, as if he forgot I don't live here all the time.
"I am going home, to Seattle," I tell him.
"Oh, shit. Right. Man, Teegan, you've become a beach kid this summer. Will you keep in touch?" he asks, and I nod right away.
"I'll be back to visit."
"Alright. Have a safe trip home, yeah?"
I nod again and watch as his truck rumbles away.
I text my dad and Kiara that my flight will be landing Seattle on Wednesday morning at 11A.M. My dad read its and doesn't reply and Kiara replies that she can't wait to see me. I haven't told her everything, but I will. I want to do it in person. I want to wait until I know what's going on with Cohen, too. It seems unreal that I'll see her in under forty eight hours.
After dinner, I decide I need to drive to Santa Maria again, and try to see Cohen. He hasn't answered my text from that morning so I have to do this, and if it doesn't work, then that will be that. I know he's in distress right now. He's not handling this well. Maybe seeing me with help.
I pull my mom's van into the parking lot at 7P.M. Instead of texting Cohen again, I just get out and go right into the hospital. It takes me a while to figure out where to go, but once I find a desk and the woman behind it greets me, I feel a bit better.
"How can I help you?" she asks. She's short and thick with wild dark hair.
"Hi, um, I'm actually trying to see if I can visit someone? I didn't really know where to go? Peter Rexton. He's in the ICU," I answer. Hopefully.
The woman looks at me and then shakes her head. "Immediate family only for the ICU. And I assume his immediate family are already here."
"Well, yes, but can you at least send me up to the waiting room? Please?"
"Of course. Third floor, ask the desk up there," she finishes.
"Thanks."
The ICU smells sterile and it's way too quiet as I push through the door into the waiting room. There's only two people sitting across the room, the rest of the chairs are empty. I take in a deep breath as I walk up to the desk.
This woman is small and thin with blond hair and glasses. She looks tired. Her name is Kerry and she forces a smile at me.
"Yes?"
"Hi. I was hoping you could give a message to someone? Um, I don't know if he's been allowed to visit, but um, Cohen Ryder... he's been here-"
"You want to leave a message for Cohen?" Kerry asks me, curious.
"Um, yeah. Well, I need to talk to him."
"Cohen's been here since Friday night. I'm surprised he's not out here right now, actually. He must have gone to get food, or something. Who are you?" Kerry is acting like her and Cohen are buddies, and I'm confused.
"Um, I'm Teegan. I guess I'll just wait... here." I turn and look at the empty chairs. "I'll be right here."
Kerry nods and leaves me alone as I cross the room and sit in a chair near the door. Half an hour passes and I mostly just sit there, praying he'll appear. I check my phone but I don't have any new messages.
When the doors finally push open, I look up right away. It's Cohen, and he's walking across the room with intent. He's holding something and his head is down and he doesn't stop until he's near the desk. Kerry looks at him and then looks at me.
I stand. "Cohen?"
He freezes and doesn't turn around right away. I wish I knew what he was thinking. When he finally looks up and over in my direction, I'm not sure it's even really him. There's dark circles under his eyes and his hair is mop of messy curls.
"Wha... you're here?" His words are choppy and he's confused.
"You haven't really answered me in two days," I say and it sounds like I'm accusing him.
"You're supposed to be in Seattle," he tells me.
"I told you, I changed my flight."
He doesn't say anything and I can tell that this isn't going to be a changing point for us. He's not going to fall into my arms and break down and let me be there for him, even for a day. He's got his guard up and he's ready to walk away.
I told him that I love him three days ago.
I still do.
"You should go, Teegan," he finally says, and for whatever reason it's exactly what I'm expecting him to say.
"You want me to go?" I ask anyway. I really need him to mean it before I walk away.
He doesn't agree, but he doesn't disagree. The look on his face is trying to tell me something but because he can't figure out how to speak like a civilized human being, I nod. I want him to cross the room so I can pull him into my arms. I want to tell him that I'm here and that he can fall apart if he needs to. But I don't, because he is already gone.