The drumming faint sound was all that filled Cheyenne's ears. It sounded like her heart waiting to leap out her chest but unfortunately for her, it was the embryo she will later call her baby.
The tears flowing out her eyes and onto her cheeks. She couldn't stop them as reality was becoming real by every minute.
"Well congratulations Ms Love, you have made it to your eighth week and as you can see". Dr Robyn gestured towards the screen, "--there is a heart beat which makes every seem real".
"The embryo is still relatively small, the size of a kidney bean. You are healthy and all your vitality signs seems to be in order". Robyn gently smiled at Cheyenne which caused the frown on her face to deepen.
How could she care for a child when she was a child herself and it didn't help she was alone with no family to help. She had no one call at all.
Yes, she had went out her way and slept with an unknown man but she didn't think or know that things would actually get this far. She honestly and truly thought she would be one to never get pregnant, well at least not with a stranger. It was the furthest thing in her mind.
"What are my options?". She softly asked, wiping the gel off the bottom of her stomach and positioning herself to sit up.
"Options? What options?". Dr Robyn's brows furrowed in confusion.
"I mean what options do I have with the baby?". Cheyenne questioned again. Dr Robyn caught on.
"Oh well you could carry the baby long term and give it up for adoption or have a legal termination but just before your twelve weeks are up ".
"What happens during the termination process?".
"Okay we have different types of termination procedures, the first one includes me giving you a pill either oral or vaginally and after a few hours, you start cramping and heavy bleeding-"
"Like you are having your period?". Cheyenne softly interjected.
"Yes, exactly like your period, but this time much more uncomfortable and painfully because remember you are carry a embryo in your uterus. We could also do a vacuum procedure where the embryo is taken out though suction. It's a little painful"
"What are the chances of these procedures working out.
"With the pill its a fifty-fifty chance that it might or might not work but with the vacuum it's 99% effective".
"Can I go home and think about?". She gently asked.
Dr Robyn nodded her head, "You can but you don't have much time left if you want the pill or a vacuum procedure. Let me know what you think but in the meantime, I can print out the sonogram for you, would you like that?".
Cheyenne carelessly shrugged. She had a lot to think about. She didn't want to make the wrong decision. She didn't want to kill off the baby only to find out that the father had intentions of wanting one and taking care of the baby but at the same time she didn't want to raise this baby alone no matter what.
She knew the pain of being alone all too well. She has been alone since the age of sixteen. Her mother committed suicide and she watched her take her last breath. Her father and younger sibling died in a horrible car crash claiming the their lives and six more passengers.
Every single thing she owned today was because of herself. She did all and everything on her own. She didn't need no man for anything but for this baby, she definitely would be.
She took herself to school, study harder so she could get scholarships for colleges which she did but the scholarships didn't cover everything so she had to work in order to always have necessities.
She knew the pain all too well and vowed to herself, that she will never in her life make herself or her children feel alone in this cruel world, even if it was the last thing she did.
"Here you are. I don't mean to put pressure on you but I need an answer by the next week, okay? So that I could set the procedure and get it done.". Dr Robyn said, handing over the sonogram and letting Cheyenne know.
"I got it". She softly smiled.
Hopping off the bed, Cheyenne pulled down the t-shirt and slipped on her pink velour jacket. She glanced down at the black and white scan she held in her hand.
She was really pregnant.
"Cheyenne?".
"Hmm?". She looked up.
"Everything will be okay". Dr Robyn said and in that moment she did think everything was going to be okay. She nodded her head and walked out.
She got in her car and turned the ignition on, waiting for the car to get heated up. She slipped her phone out her tote and dialed then number of one person she knew she could talk to.
"Cheyenne? Hi?".
"Hey, can we talk?". She nervously asked.
"Yeah we can. Is everything okay? ".
"Yes but can we not talk over the phone. Can I come see you?".
"Of cause, just buzz when you get to the gate".
"Okay". She softly responded then put on her seat belt driving to her destination
☘︎
The door was already opened when she stepped out the elevator. Her pink crocs gently glided across the carpeted floor as she made her way to room 506 on the fifth floor.
"Hey". She nervously smiled standing in front of her ex boyfriend, standing at just six feet. His brown skin glistening despite the cold weather. He wore a wife beater and grey sweatpants which looked good against his build.
"Wassup babygirl, are you okay?". He asked, engulfing her into a side hug.
"Yeah I'm fine, how are you?". She said, stepping inside and looking around the apartment. It looked way different from the last time she had been there which was two years ago when they had broken up.
"I'm living. You look good as always". He stated with a smirk playing on his lips and closing the door behind him.
"Khalil please ". She softly smiled, shaking her head.
"I'm being honest ". He shrugged, leading her to the couch.
"Wow....things have changed around here". Cheyenne spoke out loud looking around. Things they have purchased together were no longer displayed in the apartment of cause. He had changed every single thing from the painting on the walls to the couch and even the TV.
"I mean... I had to let go a lot of things. Our things". Khalil stated
"Hmm". Cheyenne nodded, folding her arms on her chest, "it looks good. New boyfriend?". She investigated, looking at him as he took a seat besides her.
"Maybe, not that's your business though. Why did you call me Chey?". Khalil dismissed her question, eyes fixated on her.
Embarrassment filled her body as she remembered the real reason why she came over. Her mouth gaped open but no words were let out.
"What is it Chey? Is everything alright?". Khalil bombarded, grabbing her hand so to calm down the shaky hands and bouncing leg.
"Khalil, I'm pregnant ". She mumbled, voice cracking at the news she had put out forth.
"What?". Khalil inquire, his brows furrowed in confusion.
"I'm pregnant"
"Who finally took you out the game?". He teased but Cheyenne did not find anything funny. The tears pooled in her eyes, glancing down at her hands as they lightly shook.
"I don't know. It's was a one night stand. A drunken one night stand. I don't even know this man. I'm so stupid". She expressed, finally letting the tears cascade down her cheeks and palming her forehead.
It seems as if she was crying a lot more these days. Her emotions were all over the place. She wasn't one to cry but the pregnancy really brought out her real feelings.
"Yeah that was stupid of you. I mean you are known to make better life decisions out of the two of us".
"How could I sleep with a man I didn't know? Now look at me, carrying his baby". She scoffed, standing up and pacing the floor.
"What am I going to do with this baby. Where do I even start looking for him? I don't remember his last or first name either". She rambled on, wiping her tears
"Chey, you can easily find this man. You in IT right?".
"Yeah...", She trailed off, " But not without a name or at least a single description about him".
She plopped back on the couch. Her face filled with solemn. She did want to have a decision before she proceeded to the next trimester which was close.
All she wanted was to let the father know of the baby and whatever his decision may be, she would decide upon it.
"Or just go back to where you met him and ask for the footage. I'm sure that will be easy ". Khalil suggested.
"You right. The club did have cameras". She stated, remembering the club had cameras and what not.
"But what about what you want to do? I mean with the baby?". He questioned
"I don't know yet, Khalil". She sighed, "I just want the best for everything who will be involved in this situation".
"Hmm".
"What?" She asked.
"Why did you come here? Why are you telling me this?".
"Because I know I can trust you and you are the only one I can talk to".
"We haven't talked in forever. How did you know I haven't changed my number" . He grilled.
"I took my chances". She shrugged.
"You need to do better Cheyenne. Start letting people in. You can't be dependent on me alone to always be there for you".
"I know that but I don't want to open up and end up getting hurt. You know how I am". She whined.
"I do know and what I do know is, it gets lonely sometimes and one day you are going to need somebody".
Cheyenne shook her head. She believed she needed no one. She could stand on her own and never have to depend on anyone. Everyone else seems to have disappointed her- Khalil included too.
"Just take my advice".
"Hmm"
꧁꧂
thoughts?