It's a very busy day at the lab. It’s moments like this I love about my job; when there’s noticeable progress. And as much as I love it, it was almost overwhelming and intimidating. Coming from small town in White Oak, I was the main character. I can say I’m the smartest person to ever come out of that city and I wouldn’t be wrong.
Even while I was at Princeton, I was easily top three most intelligent during my time but coming here to England, I’ve been humbled. I am not as intelligent as I thought I was. Everybody here is intelligent. Everyone knows what they are doing but there are others who are high up in the ladder and I am not part of that group.
Take Azizul from Singapore for instance. Azizul intimidates me more than anyone here. He graduated Harvard at 19 and went on to get other degrees at the top universities in his country. He is the type of person that’s friendly with everyone. He goes around making friends and all that kumbayah shit. It’s not a bad thing. He’s just trying to make friends, unlike me.
You’d think his ‘let us get along like one big happy family’ activity would affect his performance but false, he is the only person that has made any remarkable progress since we all arrived two weeks ago. And I would be lying if I said that didn’t piss me off.
B “Whatcha doing?” The voice and presence appears so suddenly next to me that I jump five feet in the air almost knocking off the microscope I had my face buried in off the table.
“Fuck”. I turn to face the person, ready to give them the piece of my mind until I see who it is.
“Spencer”
Spencer smiles at me. I smile back.
Who is Spencer? Spencer is my friend. Well, she is the first person I can proudly say is my friend here. She’s one of the two British scientists here. You’d think because England was hosting us, there would be more English scientists but no, I have to give that to the Chinese. Six of them came, about a quarter of us all.
Back to Spencer, Spencer is different. In a company full of nerds - I included- in every sense of the word, Spencer is the sore thumb. Not only does she not look like a nerd, she doesn’t dress like one either. Like Azizul, she can do whatever she wants and still come out on top which made her the team leader. I may also have a tiny crush on her but that’s beside the point.
“Did I startle you? Sorry” She winces.
“No, no it’s fine”
She’s also seven years older than me and treats me like a older sister would treat her younger brother but my mind has decided this is who I’m going to crush. She also happens to my first crush in ages.
“You’ve been on it for hours, haven’t you? And before you deny it, I know you have. Did you even have lunch?”
See, like she’s my older sister.
“I did, I ate”
“I said lunch.” She shakes her head at me. “You don’t have to work so hard, you know? I mean you should but not the way you are. You’re going to wear yourself out. And I know because you’re the youngest here, you feel like you need to prove yourself. You’re here and you’re the youngest, that’s proof enough”
Okay. I don’t think my working habits warranted that pep talk. Alright, maybe it did. I know I have to slow down. My body knows I have to slow down.
“Thank you”
She smiles at and rubs my hair fondly. Gosh, I’m going to commit mass murder.
“So, a group of us except Viv are going to hang out in an hour and you are coming with us”
Hang out? But we have work.
“We can’t just leave. We have work”
“It’s after work hours, Victor. That’s why I came to get you”
“Oh.” I didn’t know time had passed that fast.
“So, will you come with us? We’re going to that Korean restaurant down the street. We’ll grab a bite and some alcohol. What do you say?”
“Oh I would love to but I don’t drink. I’m not legal yet”
So I love to follow the law, sue me. I did say I’m a nerd.
“Yes, you can love. You’re in England now, remember”
“Oh, but-”
“If you don’t want to, it’s fine. Azizul won’t either. But I don’t want no for an answer. Last week, you didn’t attend that brunch either. You must this one”
I don’t know. I know I have to make efforts to be more sociable but I am not a social person and I am often misunderstood and come off as rude.
“I can see the wheels turning. Just come along. If you hate it, I’ll make up an excuse for you. Don’t worry”
How can I ever say no to her? It’s giving mommy issues.
We clink our beer glasses - except Azizul who opts for Pepsi- together saying cheers. It takes me a minute to realize Azizul doesn’t take alcohol because of his religion and I feel dumb. I pull back and take a sip. Ugh. I have tasted beer before obviously, but it is still as nasty as ever. Spencer was right. Everyone is here, except Viv from Canada. Twenty three people. We have two tables joined together to accommodate everyone.
“It’s good to have you here, Victor”, Azizul - of course it’s Azizul- says looking in my direction. He is seated at the other side of the table, not directly in front of me but next to Yuan from China who sits in front of me. He puts me on edge as much as he intimidates me.
“I know, right? We all expected you at the brunch last week”, Ross from USA says. Ross wants to be friends with me at all cost. He’s the other person from the States and thinks because I’m also American, we’re supposed to be friends or brothers in Christ. I beg to differ.
I offer a smile to them in response then add a ‘thanks’ in case the smile wasn’t enough.
“We’ve had a successful two weeks, guys. We should be proud of ourselves”, Spencer says this time. I wouldn’t call it successful. Or maybe I am being delusional. For decades, centuries even, medical practitioners have striving to find a cure for cancer and their efforts have proved abortive. I don’t know why I think our team will suddenly be the super heroes that find a cure two weeks in. Everybody else agrees with Spencer and I’m just getting ahead of myself.
“So, Victor,” Azizul starts again and the attention is back on me. Does he do this on purpose?
“Last week, when you were not here, we all gave little introductions about ourselves and now it’s your turn.”
I am too stunned to speak for a few seconds. Everybody’s eyes are on me now and I can’t say ‘no thank you’ and confirm that the rumors are true; I’m a very rude person. But I know I have to say something.
“Um, uh, hi, I’m Victor”
“Hi Victor”, Azizul says before I can continue as if we are in a gathering where we share our trauma or something. Spencer, who is closer to him, hits his side playfully. He laughs quietly and directs a smile in my direction. I quickly look away because the fuck.
“Go on, Victor,” Josh from Germany says. At 33, he’s the oldest among us.
“I’m 21. I’m from white Oak, Texas. It’s a small city of about six thousand people. I graduated from Princeton five years ago and acquired my masters and PhD at MIT. I’m grateful for this opportunity. I’m a little bit awkward”
“Aren’t we all?” Spencer interrupts. That makes me feel better. I hope to God that I’m saying the right things.
“Uh” I raise my glass because I have nothing else to say, “Cheers”
Everyone raises their drink and I’m glad no one calls me out for the short and cryptic introduction. Even Azizul doesn’t say anything, thank God. I’m mostly glad that the attention is off me.
The gathering continues as normal as it could. To be honest, it would have been awfully boring if it weren’t for Azizul and Maria from Rwanda making jokes at random times. I’ve wanted to leave for some time now but I already have numerous strikes against me. I have to try and get along with everyone, even with the high king Azizul.
A few minutes later, Spencer saves my ordeal by saying,
“Guys I have to leave now. My ride is here,” she says proceeding to stand. I quickly jump at that attention.
“Can I catch a ride with you, please?” I’m up on feet before Spencer and I feel my face heat up in embarrassment. If I haven’t made it obvious that I didn’t want to be here, I do right now. Nobody calls me out for it which is a relief. They’re good people. I’m the problem.
Spencer finally stands.
“Okay, we’ll take our leave now. Bye guys. See you on Monday, bright and early”
“Bye, thanks for dinner,” I add. It’s the right to do.
Everyone says goodnight in return.
“Goodnight, Victor,” Azizul says. Of course he does. He has made it his life decision to torment me.
“Goodnight.” I turn away from him when I feel my face heat up because what the fuck?
Spencer arrives next to me and we both walk out of the restaurant.
“So, it wasn’t that bad, was it?” Spencer asks me as we stand outside waiting for her ride.
I rub my hand together. It’s cold tonight. I thought she said her ride is here. Not me complaining. It is really cold though. According to every London resident I’ve met, it’s not that cold but to me, it is. If there’s one thing I cannot stand coming to England, it’s the weather. So unpredictable. Maybe it is predictable but I have just lived in White Oak my whole life where it’s sunny as hell almost through out the whole year.
“It wasn’t,” I provide an answer to Spencer’s question.
“Azizul is very talkative.” It’s out of the mouth before I can stop myself. Fuck. I’ve messed up big time.
Instead of a expected frown from Spencer, I get laughter instead.
“Oh, man, Azi is going to have a field day when he hears that”
Please don’t tell him, I want to say to her but I don’t understand her statement. What is that supposed to mean?
“What does that mean?” I knew Spencer and Azizul were close but they might be closer than I think. Perhaps they are dating. Wait that makes sense. That is why he won’t stop talking to me. He wants me to watch my back. He wants me to know that Spencer is his. They are closer in age too so it makes sense.
“He’s been so curious about what you think of him. Talkative it is.” She laughs again as if it’s funny and I’m confused further.
“What?”
Spencer turns to face me now.
“Azizul likes you”
I freeze up. I do.
“What?” I think I say out loud.
“What? Ooh, our ride is here.” Spencer is walking and I’m still standing frozen up. What?
“Victor, come on”
I have no choice but to walk after her. I’m having an outer body reaction. We arrive by a car, an SUV. Spencer opens the door for me. I think I say thank you. I take my seat and I’m still having an outer body reaction.
Azizul likes you.
“Hi, baby,” Spencer is seated at the passenger seat at the front. Wait, baby? I’m suddenly aware that I’m in a car and Spencer is kissing some guy who sat in the driver’s seat. That’s not Azizul.
“Baby? I thought you said I’m your only baby.” I flinch at the tiny voice that sounds next to me.
I turn and alas, this is a child, no, there are children seated next to me seated in the special car seat things cars have for children.
Whose nightmare did I wake up in?
Spencer is married with children and “Azizul likes you”
“You’ll always be my number one baby, angel,” Spencer says to one of the kids who have their attention on me. Children and the way they stare at you as if you’re from another planet.
“Victor.” Spencer saves the day again. “This is my fiancé Mark. Mark, this is my co worker, Victor”
The guy, Mark, turns to face me. He gives me a small smile,
“Nice to meet you, Victor”
“Same here”
“Those two back there are Mark’s niece and Nephew, Chiharu and Hiroki”
So, not their kids. They can still break up. I must look like a fool looking between Mark, the black guy and the kids who are Asian.
“I’m adopted,” Mark says to me and I’m embarrassed again.
I knew that but it takes a second for my brain to catch up.
Azizul likes you.
“Cool,” I say lamely and realize I should have gone with silence.
“It’s more than cool.” Trust Spencer to make me feel better and worse.
“He has seven siblings. Five of them are adopted. His mother only gave birth to the kids’ father and his twin sister. Those two bundles of joy are also twins”
I turn to them. It is kind of obvious. The bundles of joy in question have their attention on the tab in their hands. They look like three, four at most. I didn’t know children at this age can handle electronic appliances but the more you know. Kids these days.
The car drive goes well. And I say well because Spencer and Mark talk and exclude me from their conversation which I’m thankful for.
Azizul likes you.
As Spencer and Mark drops me at the junction that leads to Daisy’s, Azizul likes you is all I can think about. I say thanks to the couple and it’s the first sentence I’ve meant wholeheartedly all day. Spencer is a nice person and Mark looks smitten by her so I’m not heartbroken.
Azizul likes you can mean a lot of things. The conclusion I’ve come up with that Azizul wants to be best friends and nothing else. I don’t want to be best friends though. I don’t even want anything to do with him.
As I near the door to Daisy’s door, I realize I also have home issues to deal with. The issues are Daisy’s friends, well except Cam. Cam is cool. She minds her business and is nice to me. I don’t mind her staying at Daisy’s all the time but the other two, especially Lucas. I wish and hope he would disappear forever.
I understand Jeremy. Jeremy hates me. Jeremy is disgusting. Jeremy is like the guys I have been surrounded by my whole life, only that he’s English. Lucas on the other hand, is a menace. He thinks he’s the shit. His friends treat him he’s the shit and I’m done with it.
For my sanity’s sake, I hope he’s not here today. As I open the front door, I realize God must hate me because he’s the only person in the living room.
Well shit.