Ch.20
Rather than facing Florian and helping him out at the farm, you continued to avoid your problems by helping out at the castle. This time it wasn't with feeding a bunch of hungry men. On this lucky day, you were out of the kitchen and put to work on the garden outside. Jimin said there was a lot of work to be done that couldn't simply be fixed with his magic alone. Him and Taehyung were going to do it themselves until Hoseok volunteered. He was more than happy to help and wanted to be of service. That naturally got Seokjin to volunteer and you joined them on their little mission.
It was certainly nice feeling a part of a team. A nice distraction from the stuff bugging you outside of your life at the palace. None of the men had a clue, not even your raven who you knew you couldn't keep it secret from for long. You would try your best to do so. Still, there was no telling with that nosey little raven. He was bound to find out one way or another. In the meantime, you put yourself in the sun to pull out weeds with the others. It thankfully wasn't too hot today. You weren't sweating profusely and the other guys were just as thankful. It made this task a lot less painful.
Right now, the hardest worker felt like Hoseok. He somehow had the perfect tool to help with pulling out stubborn dead plants. It worked a lot better than a basic shovel. It left all of you in awe, though when you really thought about it, it was Hoseok. Of course he had a clever tool! One he made himself and he was more than thrilled to show it off. He ended up giving the tool to you since he didn't want you working too hard with a shovel. It was very sweet of him! All you had to do was place the staff right above a stubborn weed, shove it down and press a button. You were able to easily pluck it out just like that!
The rest of the guys weren't so lucky. Jimin could manipulate plants for the most part and Taehyung was able to kill any plants that were harmful. He joked saying it was the few times his powers were useful. Then there was Seokjin who was doing his best with a shovel. He was still pretty weak in the legs. Eventually, Hoseok had to give him a hand held shovel to work closely to the ground. There was less of a risk that way. So that's what all of you were doing on this nice day.
"A little sweat isn't too bad. I mean, I'm sure I look nice with a little glow." Jimin fanned his face. "I'm pretty dashing already and now with the sweat?" Jimin proceeded to whistle, earning confused looks from Seokjin and Hoseok. Meanwhile Taehyung just chuckled and nodded along to his friend's words. "And you know what, Taehyung? You too! We're a dangerous duo, you and I."
"You think so? You think I'm dangerous?" Taehyung blinked innocently.
"Oh, a hundred percent! Not in the way Jungkook thinks. I'm talking about your looks." Jimin wagged his finger to Taehyung. He was more than ready to hype up his friend who was blushing dark blue. "Don't act like you don't know! You're quite the looker! Right, (F/n)?"
"Yes, Taehyung is very beautiful." You nodded with a giggle. There was something about the pixie that made him look absolutely ethereal. His features that made him stand out from natural humans were his strength. He felt unreal at times when he stood in his taller height. You had no problem joining the Taehyung appreciation party, unaware of the way it affected the pixie. Taehyung felt like he couldn't breathe for a few seconds. He didn't know what to say while his friend continued to talk loudly.
"Exactly! (F/n) sees what I'm seeing!" Jimin smacked his hands together for emphasis.
"I'm beautiful too," Seokjin added.
"Yeah, we're more than aware." Jimin pouted. He crossed his arms as he looked the merman up and down. Seokjin had no business looking that pretty.
"What about me?" Hoseok smiled.
"I'm gonna pretend you didn't ask that." Jimin turned away as Hoseok's jaw dropped.
"That's mean!" Taehyung smacked his friend.
"You're handsome, Hoseok!!" You were quick to assure the elf. It looked like his soul had left his body.
The fairy had to have just been teasing, but you didn't find it funny one bit. Neither did Seokjin. Except his approach to the situation was much different from yours. He wasn't quick to focus on Hoseok and shower the elf with compliments like you. Instead, the merman got up from the ground to walk over to Jimin with his shovel in hand. Normally, the pink haired man wasn't so intimidating yet with the slight limp in his walk from his tired legs and weapon in hand...he looked a bit too suspicious approaching Jimin who had his back turned to him.
"W-What are you doing with that shovel, Seokjin?" Taehyung gulped. Seokjin was getting a little too close to the fairy.
"Huh?" Jimin looked over his shoulder. His eyes first noticed Seokjin's legs before he looked up to see the intense gaze of a man who wasn't afraid to hurt somebody. Jimin collapsed from his squat, crawling away only to have Seokjin take a step closer to him. "S-Seokjin, hold up."
"I don't condone whatever you're about to do!" You shouted in an attempt to shut down any violence. It seemed to fall on deaf ears though as you whined. Hoseok wasted no time rushing over to you to cover your eyes. What about stopping Seokjin!?
"Think about what you're doing, Seokjin!!" Jimin screamed, his voice getting high pitched. "You can't take it back!"
"Seokjin, thank you. I'm glad you love me this much." Hoseok sounded touched. That's not what he should sound like!
"Taehyung, do something!!" Jimin hissed.
"S-Seokjin, please." Taehyung trembled. He was scared and he knew he wouldn't be able to change anything.
"No violence!!" You pleaded.
"Who said anything about violence?" Seokjin looked over at you with confusion. That got all of you to pause and stare at him in shock. Hoseok stopped covering your eyes, speechless. Jimin began breathing a little faster and chuckled.
"O-Of course, he wouldn't hurt me!" Jimin coughed. Seokjin turned back to face Jimin, raising the shovel up in the air. It was not looking good once again! You shrieked while the others panicked. "SEOKJIN, NO!!"
"I just want to set some things straight with you." Seokjin narrowed his eyes on the fairy.
"Put the shovel down!!" Jimin panicked.
"What is all this noise for!?"
The potential murder came to halt at the sound of Namjoon's voice. It roared over the courtyard, causing everyone to be silent. None of you moved once more until Namjoon began walking down the stone steps. Heads slowly turned to face him to see Yoongi walking quietly by his side. The expression the vampire had was unreadable. As for the prince's face, everyone could tell he was agitated. Hearing all of you screaming and not working were the exact ingredients to piss him off. Namjoon looked at all of you as he released a frustrated sigh. A majority of the looks he received were scared while you gave him a smile and a small wave, but Hoseok put your hand down.
Maybe your optimism would just make him angrier. You could never tell with Namjoon. He kept his arms behind his back as he walked across the backyard to get closer to everyone. His strides were long and perfectly matched with Yoongi's. He didn't spare a glance at you and Hoseok when walking past the two of you. Namjoon's eyes were narrowed specifically on Jimin and Seokjin. They were the source of the ruckus. Jimin had stayed frozen on the ground and Seokjin was completely baffled despite still holding the shovel up in the air. That was not helping his case.
"Pray tell there is no execution occurring on my very own property." Namjoon glared at the merman. Seokjin furrowed his brows in confusion, looking at Yoongi for help.
"Can you really not–ugh. You better not be murdering someone in his backyard." Yoongi rolled his eyes. Something so simple yet Seokjin was going to take advantage of the man who was like a translator. It irked the prince even more.
"Shall I have you punished for attempting to harm a guest? Nay, attempting blatant murder?" Namjoon frowned.
"I don't know what any of that meant. I can tell you one thing though, I'm not trying to kill anyone." Seokjin stretched his arm out with the shovel. Immediately, Namjoon took a step back and Yoongi slapped Seokjin's hand to knock the shovel out of his hand.
"Have you gone mad!?" Yoongi huffed.
"It's a dull shovel!" Seokjin shouted in his defense.
"He almost killed me!" Jimin yelled.
"I bet within reason." Namjoon gave the fairy a look to become silent. Jimin scoffed before pouting and crawling over to Taehyung. The pixie was quick to hug and comfort his friend. Once more, Namjoon sighed heavily to face Seokjin. "Your conduct is most addling and a cause for concern in the eyes of many."
"Namjoon, can you stop speaking in tongues? Seokjin needs to understand you," Hoseok said. He was not helping! You lightly smacked his shoulder and he shrugged to you.
"No killing. That's bad...at least in this case, don't kill his Majesty's guest. He expects you all to behave." Yoongi crossed his arms.
"Interesting hearing that from you." Another voice joined the party. This time it was Jungkook who showed up with a smile. He laughed at Yoongi's sour expression, waving at everyone else. "What did I miss?"
"Seokjin almost killed me," Jimin grumbled.
"I did not! Namjoon is talking funny!" Seokjin quickly pointed a finger at the prince.
"My way of speaking–in comparison to yours–is refined! Barbaric and nonsense leaves all of you!" Namjoon stomped his foot. He gritted his teeth now, about ready to start harming people himself. That's when Jungkook grabbed Namjoon's arm to calm him down while Yoongi took the other. The relaxing warmth from the angel slowly soothed the prince. That ability from the angel was often forgotten yet it came at such perfect timing. It was exactly what the redhead needed.
"Take deep breaths." Jungkook instructed. Once Namjoon looked like he wasn't going to strangle anyone, Jungkook patted the man's shoulder and reached out for Seokjin. "Buddy, you gotta cool it with the whole talking business. Namjoon's trying his best to adjust to the modern world. He's been through enough already."
"...yeah." Seokjin nodded weakly.
"And what's with this whole killing business? That's not you. That's not the Seokjin I know!" Jungkook laughed as Seokjin rubbed his arm.
"I wasn't going to kill anyone. I just wanted Jimin to say Hoseok is attractive." Seokjin shrugged, chuckling now that he said it outloud.
"And who needs Jimin's approval? Hoseok is a dashing man! Anyone can see that!" Jungkook assured the merman. That was all it took to have Seokjin beaming with a smile. Jimin whined in the background, but he wasn't spared much glances. Hoseok put a hand on his chest, touched the angel would say that about him without being forced. Things were turning around thanks to Jungkook's presence.
"I...I apologize for my strong temper." Namjoon coughed as Seokjin accepted it. He opened his arms wide to the prince who wanted no part of it. Namjoon was incredibly uncomfortable, but Seokjin embraced him anyway.
"How did you do that?" Yoongi cocked a brow up at Jungkook.
"Angel things." Jungkook smirked before looking over at Jimin. "Hey, Jimin. No more starting fights and saying rude things about our friends, okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, I learned my lesson." Jimin kept his pout. He wouldn't be letting that go for a while. He was holding on tightly to Taehyung for safety in case Seokjin suddenly turned.
"Alright guys, let's go back to fixing up the backyard!" Hoseok stood up from the ground, clapping his hands loudly. "You gonna help out, Yoongi? Jungkook?"
"Absolutely no–"
"I don't see why not? We'd love to!" Jungkook agreed, causing Yoongi's eye to twitch.
"I did not agree!" Yoongi growled.
"If you want to live here for free then you can't be a slacker," Jungkook spoke through gritted teeth. Despite his wide smile, Yoongi swore the angel hissed at him. He would fight the man if Namjoon weren't here. Jungkook returned Yoongi's glare with no hesitation. The vampire had no doubt the angel was holding back worse things to say.
"All of you can return to your work. The only thing I request is (F/n)'s presence by my side. We have other business to attend to." Namjoon beckoned you over. It surprised you to hear that from him. Since when? You looked around at the guys to see if it was okay to suddenly leave. None of them would protest against the prince though. "It's alright, (F/n). Come hither."
"Yes, Sir." You dropped your tool and rushed to his side. A part of you winced internally for calling him 'Sir' like that. Namjoon didn't mind it one bit.
"We'll be off."
Seeing you disappear with Namjoon left some of the men confused. They weren't sure what Namjoon wanted with you and you were thinking the same thing. He didn't appear to be angry with you. He was earlier, but at Seokjin. It only reminded you of the merman's words regarding Namjoon yesterday. Thinking about it made you want to laugh. As tempting as it was, you didn't dare risk angering Namjoon over something like this. You're bad at lying in front of the guys. You haven't known them for long too which made it more baffling. But you made sure not to stay too stuck in your thoughts about them. You needed to be present and keep up with Namjoon's pace!
The prince hadn't said a word to you. He kept walking through the palace without looking back to see if you were still following him. Almost as if he expected you to do so without question. Which you did! Sometimes you weren't sure if you were trying hard to make him like you or if you were just a pushover. It could be anything! Either way, you walked out the front doors with him and came down the stairs. Namjoon at least stuck his arm out for you to make sure you didn't trip when coming down. He did stuff like that for you without even thinking. It had you feeling like maybe things were getting better between the both of you. It automatically made you brave enough to speak up.
"Where are we going exactly?" You asked curiously. You stared up at him as the two of you walked past the palace gates.
"We're going to practice our fighting. What else?" Namjoon treated it like it was obvious.
"Ah...in the woods again so soon?" You took a nervous look around.
"I assure you that we will not see another creature on this outing." Namjoon nodded.
"How do you promise that?"
"I can't promise it, but it is something I demand of the universe." Namjoon chuckled. "I figure it's the least it can do for me after everything." He attempted to make a light-hearted joke.
You didn't say anything else, but you gave him a small smile. He had only joked to brighten the mood. That didn't change the fact that you knew how heavy that particular subject was for him. The two of you walked a little further into the forest and Namjoon must have noticed how quiet you had been. The last thing he said probably set off the mood for this outing. It was a bit tense, even he could admit that. He walked a little further with you before stopping in his tracks. Namjoon looked down at you with a soft sigh. You would never mention it to his face or say anything blunt. No, you were too kind for that. Namjoon was well aware of how gentle and sensitive you were, especially towards others. He may have tried to brush off his past, but you easily sensed his distress and it affected you.
Namjoon could joke all he wanted. That didn't change what you have witnessed in the past. He was quick to anger with those memories and hit with heavy depression. Namjoon would stare out at nothing and sigh heavily for hours if it were not for all his roommates who kept him busy. They got him out of his mind, forcing him to live in the present. But now that it was just the two of you, there was less of that. You didn't laugh along with him. Instead, you lowered your head and felt his pain with him. Living on while everyone he knew was long gone? If you thought about it in detail, it would honestly make you cry for him.
"Namjoon, I'm sorry." You faced him with a frown. It was almost turning into a pout. The prince sighed, bringing his hand up to your head.
"Your heart is too big, (F/n)," Namjoon said. "You look about ready to cry. Must I get pecked at once more?"
"No..." He managed to make you giggle this time. You brought down his hand from your head, but you didn't let go of Namjoon. "But are you okay? I know it must still hurt."
"It does, but what is the use of reminding myself of the pain? It won't change my reality. The past is set. I'm here now." Namjoon shrugged with a sad tone.
"If you could go back in time...would you?" You questioned. It brought out silence from the prince. He thought about it briefly yet you knew he must have thought deeply about this before.
"No. Only because I fear mistakes will repeat and living it once was more than enough." Namjoon shook his head.
The smile he gave you this time felt forced. He was trying to pass himself off as tough and brave. But someone can only handle so much grief. You continued to give Namjoon a sad look that seemed to make his facade crack. He didn't need to be tough all the time. You wanted him to know his feelings were more than okay. You held no resentment towards Namjoon from the times he's yelled at you and snapped at you. It hasn't been easy adjusting for him. He allowed his hand to hold yours, walking you over to a tree to sit down. Neither of you were up for training anymore. You stayed glued to Namjoon's side, waiting for him to say more. He felt embarrassed opening up, but at the same time, he was glad it was to someone as understanding as you.
"I can admit, I am no saint myself. I brought the curse upon myself and my people." Namjoon felt your hand squeeze his. "It's true. Back then, I listened to my father closely. He was a man with a hardened exterior and he raised me to be just the same. Of course, we're not exactly alike. I had my exceptions yet unfortunately being kind was not one of them. I could be harsh to my staff and cold to my subjects. They were all easily beneath me, so it didn't quite matter. I still had a duty to protect them and I failed miserably. Look at what I've allowed to happen. We have creatures on this island!"
"Yes, but that was the demon's fault. Not yours." You patted his hand.
"That's not certain. Had I accepted that woman's affection, maybe we wouldn't be sitting together like this." Namjoon pursed his lips. It was a conflicting idea for him. He would be in the past where he felt most comfortable. A time he desperately missed. But now he knows you and the others...he didn't want to let that go either.
"Possibly or possibly not. That demon was probably going to harm everybody in the end. It was using that woman's body as a vessel," you told him. Namjoon nodded along, staring down at the ground as he thought back to then.
Those memories would never disappear for the prince. When he looked back on them, a fond smile appeared on his lips. He lived up to be twenty-two back then before his life was put on pause and everything occurred. While not everything was splendid, he still had happy memories that he cherished of those days. You stayed seated next to Namjoon as he found himself talking about the days that were good. He wanted to remember his old life that held happy memories in it. His birthday ball was not the only moment in his life and he refused to let you only pity him. Namjoon wanted you to see that he did live a good life then, even if he wasn't the perfect person. This was his second chance, but his first chance still meant something to him and held a lot of value.
Namjoon was quick to tell you the story about his first horse riding lesson. He was only ten at the time and he had been persistent about learning to his father. It was the perfect excuse to escape the stuffy rooms and not listen to his tutor drone on about manners or customs. The moment his father allowed it, Namjoon went as fast as he could before his father could change his mind. He got on a horse and thought he would be an absolute natural. Thinking about it made Namjoon want to smack himself in the head. Younger him had quite the ego.
The dimples on Namjoon's cheeks were appearing. They were always a welcomed sight that you never wanted to take for granted. Namjoon couldn't remove his smile when he told you about the horse he chose that day. An old, cranky one that had no patience for Namjoon's attitude. It didn't want to move a single bit and when Namjoon kicked his leg into the horse, he was thrown off into a rose bush. It hurt at the time, but Namjoon had no problem laughing at himself. It wasn't the first time he's made a bad decision.
It made you curious to know what Namjoon was like back then. Was it really that different two hundred years ago? To a degree, Namjoon felt things were the same due to the isolation of the island. He also couldn't deny the changes to his castle and the way others spoke. The way you dressed was even a bit different from the women back then. He told you how stiff things were. The women wouldn't be caught dead showing collarbones or their ankles. Everything you were currently doing right now with your dress. It made you laugh and Namjoon watched you with his own content smile.
"Not that there's anything wrong with your dress. You look lovely." Namjoon gave it his stamp of approval. Even if he didn't like it, that would be tough for him. Miss Arla bought you this dress and you loved it anyway.
"Thank you. However, that does explain why you thought poorly of me at first," you mentioned.
"Oh that? Right, well...I have no excuse." Namjoon's face turned red. He thought you were begging him to do unspeakable things to you when you just wanted him to see a merman. The audacity! But you were able to laugh about it and so could Namjoon.
"I'm assuming you were quite the womanizer in your day."
"You make it sound like I've aged as poorly as milk." Namjoon teased. "I'll have you know, I don't look a day over twenty-two and women were dropping at my feet. Not just because I was the prince! I'm handsome, clearly an intellectual, and effortlessly charming."
"Oooh, how exciting." You watched him nod with pride.
"Yes, yes, my life was full of thrills. To this day as well I suppose," Namjoon added. He stared up at the clouds in the sky past the trees. Everything felt so peaceful right now. Sitting next to you, the breeze was cool and it felt surprisingly comfortable. "What about you?"
"What about me?" Your brows rose at this question.
"What about your life? I imagine it has had its own thrills with you being a sorceress and all." Namjoon gently nudged your shoulder. It made you think back on your life with a hum.
"Thrilling? That's one way to put it." You found yourself squeezing Namjoon's hand unintentionally.
In comparison to Namjoon's lavish lifestyle back then, you weren't raised in a castle with multiple staff members waiting on your hand and foot. You were raised in a nursery for a majority of your youth. Rather than going to your current home that belonged to your parents, you were kept at the nursery since there was no proper orphanage. Everyone had at least one parent still alive to take care of them. What happened to your parents was unfortunate, but you didn't really think twice about it when you were young. The adults around you liked to tiptoe around the subject and gave you toys to play with by yourself.
A lot of memories were by yourself when you were small. The adults didn't feel comfortable watching you. Either because they saw you as some bad luck charm or because they claimed it was such a sad sight. That was always a strange excuse to you. They worried more about protecting themselves just like the other excuse veiled by pity. Due to the lack of interactions, you were practically mute when you were young. All you did was nod and shake your head until you were seven. That's when you were getting braver to speak even with such a soft voice.
Teachers would tell you to speak up more than you could count. It was something you were gradually improving on. It wasn't until you were thirteen that the nursery packed up your things and told you that you could take care of yourself where your parent's used to live. It wasn't that shocking to you. They had been waiting to get rid of you and you were used to looking out for yourself. You were actually kind of excited to live on your own. They handed you a pouch of shillings that honestly would only feed you for three days. You made it work though by buying seeds and a cookbook. Then with the remaining money you had, you purchased other necessities. It was a good thing your home came furnished and filled with things that belonged to your parents.
It wasn't much. A few personal belongings like pieces of jewelry, a couple of letters, and things of that sort. Nothing to really remember them by. You placed it all in a box and put it away. Throwing them out felt wrong, but you couldn't force yourself to feel a connection. You've been alone all your life and that was it. You told yourself that this would be fine. That's how you took care of yourself. It was easy when you were alone. It was when you were at school with others that you hated it. Peers mocking you and treating you like some curse. Life wasn't great until Miss Arla came into the picture. She truly changed your life.
"Miss Arla's really sweet. She made me feel like good luck and I'm so grateful to her." You moved your feet happily. The smile on your face was wide until you took notice of Namjoon's expression. He stared at you like there was a creature behind you. "Is everything alright?"
"I cannot possibly fathom how you smile so brightly." Namjoon scoffed as you blinked innocently at him. "That! Right there! Those big innocent eyes despite everything you have gone through. I struggle to understand why you are not furious and hateful."
"...I wonder too sometimes. But I know it takes too much energy to hold onto hate. Life hasn't been fair to everyone else here on Concordia either. They're victims too," you answered honestly. It only shocked the prince more.
"You think of their pain even though they are the source of yours?" Namjoon furrowed his brows. "Absolutely not! When I was fifteen and a boy from the village hit my head with a pinecone, I swung my fists at him!"
"Oh...was he okay?" You asked.
"What about me!? Do you have any clue as to why he threw an object at me?" Namjoon brought a hand to his chest.
"You told me you weren't kind." You shrugged as Namjoon shut his eyes tightly.
"Yes, but...I kissed his girlfriend. However, she was the one who wouldn't look away from me during my father's celebration." Namjoon huffed. You tilted your head at him, unsure what you were supposed to learn from this story.
"Namjoon...I think you were the one in the wrong."
"Don't tell me! I know now..." Namjoon pulled his hand away from you to cross his arms. He turned away from you to pout like a child. It was something you actually found quite humorous. You laughed against your wishes. You had tried to keep it in, but it slipped and it started out small only to come out bursting. Namjoon rolled his eyes until he felt your arms wrap around him. He never expected you to hug him after saying something like that. The prince turned his head to look at you, completely bewildered at your reason for doing so.
"Seeing you were wrong is an improvement. You can definitely be better now with your second chance. I believe you can, Namjoon!" Your words made the prince's chest tighten. It was an odd feeling he's never felt before. "I know for certain that you're a good person deep down. You deserve to have a happy life."
"...goodness. Are you sure you're not an angel yourself?" Namjoon didn't quite know what to say. If this was back then, he knew nobody would have ever said something like that about him. His heart shook as he hugged you back and took a deep breath. Maybe his happiness was starting now.
Life felt like it slowed down in the forest for the two of you. It was nice taking a rest together instead of practicing. The practice could be rescheduled for another day. Catching your breath in this moment was exactly what you needed. It allowed you to reevaluate your life and Namjoon felt the same. There was a large gap for him and life passed with the blink of an eye. It was painful thinking about it, but he felt one step closer to accepting his situation. Meanwhile you found yourself finally deciding on your issue with Florian.
*~*
Another long day had passed that you spent at the castle and in the woods. There was no slowing down in your life. Everything felt like it was going quick and you were doing your best to keep up with the pace. Although learning the magic skills from the creatures had no exact due date, you were acquiring them quicker than you thought. The only problem so far is that you have no real control over them. That was just something you'd have to work and practice on. Either with the creatures or with Namjoon again. At the same time, you don't really want to put yourself in danger on purpose. You're sure the boys all knew that.
That's what made your life feel more ridiculous. Death is literally on the line for you and you've almost lost it a couple times now. Despite all that, the thing worrying you most was what you were going to say to Florian. You've been dwelling on it since you ran away from him in panic. Thinking back on it made you want to hit yourself. Florian deserved a response and one to his face. You're not going to get out of this by leaving him a letter. If you can fight goblins and other creatures then you can talk to a boy straight to his face. Namjoon and the rest are all men to begin with. You've had practice for a while now. You can do it!
"What is that you can do?" Youngjo asked, reminding you that you weren't alone in your bedroom. You were already in your nightgown with your hair let down. In order to encourage yourself, you were standing in front of your mirror with two determined fists. "Enlighten me."
"Haha, very funny." You sent him a quick glare. He had a lot of nerve.
"It's a genuine question."
"You always tease me. I know better now," you claimed only to get Youngjo mimicking human laughter. Did he really have to pull that on you? You frowned as you dropped your fists. "Youngjo, please. I'm trying to make myself not worry so much and you aren't helping." Your hurt expression and tone affected the bird. He knew not to push it when your emotions were low. The raven blinked at you as you walked over to your bed. Dropping yourself down onto it, you sighed heavily and watched Youngjo fly over to cuddle by your side for comfort. "You're being sweet now?"
"I'm always sweet to you, my love."
"Sure, sure." You pet him. Youngjo enjoyed your touch as he leaned into your open palm.
"What is it that troubles you?" Youngjo relaxed. He wouldn't be in this gentle mood of his forever. The second he finds out that you have feelings for a human, he'll lose it. It might be tough on your precious raven, but he'll have to get used to it. You were bound to fall for someone who wasn't an animal. Youngjo waited patiently as you took in a breath.
"Florian confessed to me and I've been wondering what to answer him," you admitted, feeling Youngjo flap his wings immediately. He removed himself from your side to stare at you in disbelief. Youngjo held his wings out already in his territorial stance. Pursing your lips, you watched him open his mouth and caw loudly. "Shush. It's nighttime."
"That human! I told you he was trying to flirt with you to make you his mate!" Youngjo bounced on your bed. "Tell him he's too late!"
"I won't..." You shook your head as you brought your legs up to your chest. Leaning against the wall, you felt that heavy weight on your chest again. Everything felt so difficult and Youngjo wasn't making it easy. You took in a deep breath as you wrapped your arms around your legs. The raven stared at you silently until you were ready to speak again. You just needed time to let the cool air from the open window enter the room. "Youngjo, I really like him...I can't imagine saying no."
"..." Youngjo's wings were tucked back to his body. He didn't attempt to get near you or display any signs of aggression. He simply listened, unable to say anything when there was a waver to your voice.
"But I keep thinking about everyone at the castle and how hard it will be to keep that all a secret from him. I like Florian, but what if by letting him in...he betrays me..." You scrunched up the fabric of your night gown. "I try not to think about it too much and I know I've gotten close to getting killed before. Still...I don't think I'm ready to die, Youngjo..."
"I won't allow him to hurt you," Youngjo said. There wasn't much he could express when he was only a raven. However, he hoped remaining by your side told you more than body language or facial expressions ever could. "You truly deserve the greatest amount of happiness, (F/n). If the human boy is what you want, then...go after him."
"...really?" You glanced up at Youngjo. His dark eyes were staring back at yours and for a moment, you felt tempted to turn him into a human again so he could hold you. Though telling him you had feelings for another was already too much for the raven. You didn't want to confuse him.
"I recommend telling the others at the castle if you do. For safety reasons, if they must find a way to stop the villagers from killing you as a witch," Youngjo stated. He was right. Although you wanted to keep your personal life at the village private, this was a risk they needed to know about. And you were positive they would have their own strong opinions about it. Another sigh left you as you shut your eyes, resting your head against the wall. At least your skin was getting thicker these days. "You're growing up, (F/n). It's okay. You're doing well."