this was written in mid 2023 and i'm now deciding to post what i wrote back then, hopefully i can get back into writing to edit some of my current works. please enjoy, this is raw and unedited writing content that was supposed to be the first HALF of chapter 2
you can skip ahead if you would not like to read my little ramble btw!! 😅 (it's just a little overview of the writing for this fic along with some brief mentions of other fics that i've written)
so uhm something i wanted to mention about this story was that i'm going to try to attempt writing this more from rui's perspective instead of yn's/yours because i think that most of the story (or atleast from what i have planned out) will make more sense in his perspective
unlike the original version, i wanted to attempt to take this more in the "angst with a happy ending" route. and the "angsty" part of the story is coming MAINLY from rui's internal battle of his own feeling, things such as he's not good enough, he should try and move on, he needs to accept reality, etc.
i should probably also note that i'm not particularly good/experienced with writing angst so this might be...interesting 🤨
i will still be writing in 2nd pov, but it will be written from rui's perspective and OCCASIONALLY yn/your perspective
help i hope that makes sense, it makes sense in my brain but when i type it out it starts to get messy 😭
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫゜・。.
a few more things!! i'm so sorry for my slow updates. if i'm being honest, i've been sorta losing interest in pjsk (i haven't opened the game in a good 7 months) but i still love rui and i'm trying to make somewhat of a comeback before school starts up again. i haven't been on wattpad lately due to some personal issues and busy schedule and i try to give longer chapters (quality over quantity guys!!!)
if you didn't already know, me and my fav online friend Vailen5 have made a shared account (slaygayvai ) where we have a ruikasa x gn! reader fic along with a howls moving castle au! rui x gn! reader (although this one will be on hold for now) and i also have my requests open in my rui oneshots fic
i was considering making a tsukasa oneshots request fic as well, but truly i'm personally don't think i'm good at writing tsukasa's character very well and i'm trying to improve, so it's a future possibility!! but if that's something you would like to see in the future i'll definitely consider it
IM DONE RAMBLING IM SORRY YOU CAN SKIP THIS IF U DONT WANT TO READ IT 😭
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫゜・。.
i made a playlist for this fic :3
(the hyperlink is also in my conversations on my profile!!)
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6C5r4jS83dL6g01eWURAUU?si=d2vwlcAdQMS1oaLyyo5VhQ
"i'll quiet down if it's what you want, i understand i'm not the only one for you"
- i know you by faye webster
"the other woman, will always cry herself to sleep. the other woman, will never have his love to keep"
- the other woman by lana del rey
"and in a while i came in and got your plates,
and you guys moved on the rest of your date.
i scrubbed cheese and wished i was somebody else"
- puppy princess by hot freaks
"if you could see that i'm the one who understands you, been here all along,
so why can't you see? you belong with me"
- you belong with me (taylor's version)
by taylor swift
↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫゜・。.
You let out a small chuckle as he runs to catch up with you
"Don't think you're walking back to class without your boyfriend!" Tsukasa teases as his arm comes around your shoulder, swiftly sliding your school bag off
"Let me get that for you (young sir/milady)~" he hangs your school bag along with his own bag over his shoulder with a smile before wrapping his arm back around your shoulders
His naturally warm body temperature rubs off onto you as he brings you closer to him
"Oh, thank you" you smile as you relax more into his warm embrace as the two of you walk together through the crowded halls, catching a few glances from other students and classmates
"You're always so warm, Tsukasa" you smile as he gently moves his hand up and down on your arm, in a sense of reassurance
He chuckles at you wholeheartedly before sneaking his hand up to jaw, making your head turn towards him (rizzler 💀)
"You know, i'm so lucky to have you" he gently smiles before planting a small kiss on your lips
As he gently pulls away, you softly smile at him as you get closer to your classroom
In the distance, you could see the tall figure of Rui standing near the entrance of your homeroom, he was presumably waiting for something you thought
The memory of just a mere 10 minutes ago washed over your mind as you payed little attention to what Tsukasa was rambling on about into your ear for a moment
You began to remember the way he looked anxious and upset about something just moments before Tsukasa had hurriedly pulled you away from him
Out of the corner of his eye, he say a glimpse of you and smiled gently and immediately shifted his body towards you
As Rui turned, he parted his lips to say something but immediately faded his smile away the moment he realized you weren't alone
"Hey!" you warmly called out to Rui a few feet away down the hallway with a small wave
He awkwardly tried to force a smile and wave back as you and Tsukasa walked over to him
Rui couldn't even focus on what Tsukasa was saying or doing as he began talking to him for a hot minute
He could feel the tears trying to well up in his eyes as he watched the way Tsukasa's arm was wrapped tightly around your shoulders, bringing you in closer to him
His warm golden eyes shifted to your familiar looking school bag hanging off of his slightly broad shoulders, covered by the pale yellow cardigan he would always see worn by you during the winter season
The way you gently smiled at Tsukasa as you occasionally leaned into his touch ever so slightly. Shifting your soft gaze back onto him as he rambled on about how he was going to have a group meet up to discuss the newest play
Rui's internal thoughts battled each other as he struggled to maintain his calm manner. It felt almost as if he could've just shed a tear on the spot
Usually whenever he would see his best friend get all touchy with you it didn't really bother him all that much, it was just the fact that his emotions had slowly been building up inside, threatening to boil over and spew out like vomit
"-ui? Are you even listening to me??" the blonde's boisterous voice interrupted his thoughts, huffing in annoyance as he places his free hand, the side with your school bags, on his hip (NOT IN A MEAN WAY, JUST LIKE THE USUAL TSUKASA-RUI INTERACTION WAY)
"A-ah!" he's immediately brought back to reality the moment he realizes he's been staring too much at the two of you
"S-sorry i was zoned out, you were saying?" he spoke out so quickly and awkwardly that he stuttered over his words a little as he brought a hand up to the side of his face, feeling the soft skin of his cheeks heating up by the moment
You gently chuckled at his reaction before speaking up
"He was just talking about hosting a meeting soon for our new play" you smile as you shift your gaze to look at Rui's gentle and warm golden eyes
"Yeah! I've almost finished editing the script, so i'll see what you think!" Tsukasa took the hand off his hip and gave Rui a big thumbs up
"Ah, I see" Rui replies to the two of you in calm demeanor, softly smiling in agreement
The three of you make small talk within the last few minutes of passing period, discussing matters for the new play
In all honesty, Rui couldn't help but feel slightly...out of place the entire conversation
He stood awkwardly in front of you and Tsukasa, watching him keep an arm around you as he pulled you in closer to him ever so slightly
Tsukasa was the one who talked most of the time, you and Rui occasionally adding onto something he said or giving small reactions as you patiently listened to what he had to say
But it was hard for him to even focus on the words coming out of his mouth when his own internal thoughts were trying to take over
"We already decided that we were going to do "The Night Circus" right?" Tsukasa inquires to you and Rui, cutting Rui out of his own thoughts once again
(so im very aware the "the night circus" is already a novel title, but im uncreative and i thought it would be a fitting play title - the play in this fic that wxs preforms will not follow the plot line of the novel "the night circus" by any means. very good book though, 100% would recommend to anyone who's like 12-13+)
"Ah yes, I remember you talking about wanting to try a more...romantic play for us" Rui semi-awkwardly chuckled and brought a hand up behind his neck, gently rubbing against his nape
"Yes, I think in order for all of us to improve as actors and performers, we need to expand our horizon a little more and try something more out of our comfort zone!" Tsukasa confidently said with a determined expression across his face
You smiled at him and nodded in agreement
"I can see where you're getting at, I also think this could be a good opportunity for us to try something new" you spoke up, voice ringing through Rui's ears
"We should update Emu and Nene soon and let them know about our plans of an upcoming meeting" Rui suggests with a small smile
You return the gesture and nod in agreement
"We can tell Nene during our lunch break and I can text Emu right now" you give a small thumbs up before turning back to Tsukasa
You politely ask for your phone, since he was carrying both of your bags
"Of course, my little star!" he grins at you sweetly before opening your bag's front pouch and swiftly pulling out your phone
"Here you go, my love" Tsukasa gently plants a small kiss on your cheek as he handed you the phone
You gently chuckle at the slightly ticklish feeling (???? dude idk im lonely nobody wants me 🤨) of his soft yet a little chapped lips on your skin as you take your phone out of his hands
"Thank you, my star" you blush a bit before taping on your phone screen and unlocking it
This should've been something Rui was used to, but he couldn't help but feel hurt by the scene in front of him
He wasn't aware yet that you and Tsukasa had made things "official", but he couldn't sense that something felt...different than the usual Tsukasa - (y/n) daily flirting
It was almost too real now, not just some mutual crushing anymore
Today was just too much for him to handle and it almost felt as if they day was getting worse by the minute
His heart felt like it stopped for a moment as he observed the way Tsukasa moved to hold you from behind as he looked over your shoulder, adding on about what to send to your pink haired troupe mate
emu!! (＾▽＾)
heyyyy emu! tsukasa wanted us to plan on having a future troupe meeting to talk about our upcoming play soon. we'll talk in the group chat after school, see you then! 🩷
delivered 10:26 am
You and Tsukasa made small talk as you typed to the small, pink haired troupe member
"The Miyamasuzaka Girls schedule is a little different than ours, so she might not respond for a while, but i'll let both of you know when she does!" you smile and turn off your phone before handing back to Tsukasa to put back into your bag
You look back at Rui to see him nodding with a small smile, but something felt...off to you
You've known Rui for a while and it's not uncommon for him to suppress his feelings with a sad smile
A frown makes its way onto your face as you see the way Rui is dealing with something internally
You open your lips to say something to him in concern, but the loud sound of the ringing school bell fills the building, cutting you off completely
"Ah, there's the bell!" Tsukasa speaks up from next to you before gently sliding your bag off of his shoulders and holding it out politely in front of you
"Thank you.." you smile in gratitude as you take your bag back out of his hold
He gives you a grin in return before giving you a small kiss on your lips, causing you to blush a little at the sudden pda
"I'll see you at lunch, my little star!" is the last thing he says before speed walking off to the classroom next door
You give him a smile and a small wave before turning back to your childhood friend a bit embarrassed due to Tsukasa's pda coming out of nowhere
His expression was...disappointed to say the least, but he still made a weak attempt to cover it up
"..W-we should go inside, the bell has rung" he stammers a little before gesturing for you to walk inside the classroom before him
You really wanted to ask him if everything was okay, even though you knew it wasn't, maybe you still could've gotten him to possibly talk about it or something like that
You felt like a shitty friend for not being able to ask him what was bothering him, but nonetheless nodded and walked into the classroom
He trailed behind you as he walked into the classroom and sat down in the seat right in front of you with a noticeable frown
"Rui...is everything oka-" you call out to him softly
"Alright class! Please take out the notes from yesterday, that's were we will continue..." the teacher calls out as she walks into the classroom, shutting the door quietly before walking up to the board
You inaudibly huff as you missed your chance to comfort your childhood best friend
'Oh, I know! I'll pass him a note...' you think to yourself before ripping off a small piece of paper from your journal
'Rui, is everything okay? You seem down. If you need to talk about anything i'm here for you, okay?
(.﹒︣︿﹒︣.)'
You wrote unsuspiciously before folding it up, ready to pass to Rui sitting at the desk in front of you
You slowly reach your arm out, note in hand to his desk
Rui turns around at seeing movement in his peripheral vision, but before he could grab it, the teacher got to it before him
"(l/n), what is my rule about passing notes in class?" she firmly says before snatching the note out of your hands
"W-wait!" you accidentally stammer a little out of pure nervousness
"I'm sorry Ms. (teacher's last name), I...I was just-" you attempt to defend yourself
"(l/n), this is very disrespectful to your fellow classmates." she glares straight at you with a harsh expression drawn on her middle aged face
"I'll see you after class..." is all she spats out before continuing on with her lesson
You sigh and let out a small groan of pure frustration and slump on your desk, arms stretched out beside you, pointing straight forward
A few quiet giggles of some of your classmates could be heard from around the room
'damn it...' you mentally scold yourself before the soft touch of somebody's hand rested on top of yours, causing you to lift your head off of your desk and look up
You were greeted by the sight of Rui, looking over his shoulder ever so slightly with his arm outstretched backwards towards your desk
It reminded you of earlier this morning where you had held his hand on the way to school
The way his hands were a little calloused from working with machines all the time, yet still so naturally soft at the same time
Rui's body temperature tended to run a little colder in major contrast to the way Tsukasa always felt like a walking furnace
You couldn't help but smile a little at the kind and comforting gesture for a moment before he lifted his hand off of yours, retracting it back to himself as the teacher continued to explain the notes from the previous day
'Wait, what am i thinking?? He shouldn't be comforting me, I should be comforting him!' you give yourself a little wake up call
You brush it off and prepare yourself to make an effort to ask Rui about it after class and begin to actually pay attention to the class
About an hour passes by and the lunch bell rings throughout the school
Everybody begins to collect their supplies and bag before leaving the classroom or grouping up with friends
Rui briefly gives an anxious look before shooting out of his seat and speed walking out of the classroom, avoiding your gaze at all costs
You frown as you watch him scurry away from you thinking to yourself
'..what's going on?' you feel guilty, but you couldn't exactly put your finger on it yet
Maybe you had totally grossed him out with your pda?
Was he weirded out by Tsukasa suddenly giving you a peck on the lips?? If that was the case, you could talk to Tsukasa about not doing anything in front of Rui to make him more comfortable
You pondered for a few moments on how you could've possibly upset Rui
You really just felt like a shitty friend. Upsetting him in a way that you couldn't even understand
Nonetheless, you sigh and reluctantly pick your bag up and walk up to the teachers desk at the front of the classroom
"..Ahem." her stern voice breaks the awkward tension in the air
"..So, i'm sure you're very aware by now that i DO NOT tolerate note passing in my classroom" she gives you a harsh look along with her crisp, straightforward words
You nervously nod your head
"Yes...and i'm sorry ma'am. It won't happen again.." you nod your head in a sign of respect
"The thing is...uhm..my friend, Kamishiro Rui, who sits in front of me, seemed to be having a rough day and i just wanted to check up on him" you explain as calmly as you could manage
Her face softens a little as she gives you a slight look
"..I see" she says almost under her breath
"Very well then, you may go" she huffs in slight annoyance
You immediately perk up and bow in front of her desk while thanking her in gratitude
Afterwards, you almost bolt to the door to leave the awkward situation
On your way out of the classroom you hear her call out to you once more
"I better not see any more note passing in my class, (l/n)!" she yells from the room while you scurry out
You rush out of the classroom and let out a sigh of relief the moment you get out of her sight, but in that moment, a tall shadow looms over near you
"Hey (y/n).." Rui's familiar voice softly rings through your ears, causing you to look up
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫゜・
thanks for being patient with me, i just needed some time off of writing cause i was personally struggling with some situations at home. like i said at the beginning this was meant to be about 7-8k words but it's only ended up reaching 3.5k due to being only half written 😕