[Petunia]: Your presence soothes me
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"Screw you," I punch him on the chest with the back of my hand before jumping to my feet and practically running to the door.
"Wouldn't you like that?" He calls out after me, and I don't even look back at him as I flip him the bird and fly out of the door.
This... this... jerk! I can't believe he keeps toying with me to prove some kind of twisted point when everything I feel for him is so pure.
Every time I think I'm getting closer to him, to the old Connor I think he deep down still is, he's proving to me how oh-so-wrong I am.
I don't even register how I climb down the stairs, run out of that god-forsaken house that seems to be my hell, cross the deserted and dark street, and finally get inside my car.
Why does he always make me run away from him?
Breathless, I lean my arms on the steering wheel and rest my head on them. I can still feel his ghostly touch on my skin, right above my collarbone, his teeth pulling at my lower lip slowly, making me lose my mind. In my head, his long fingers are still wrapped around my neck, and his hot breath is looming over my mouth. A shiver runs down my body as I imagine all the things he could do to me if I didn't stop him.
Would he kiss me, really kiss me then? Would he try to go further even when he was bleeding? Would he believe me if I told him I was still a virgin because... because I always wanted him? Only him. And would he use it against me?
I close my eyes, take a couple of deep breaths, and finally regulate my breathing after what feels like an eternity.
"Damn it," I suddenly remember the reason I'm in this kind of state.
Pushing back, I turn the light inside the car on and pull the vanity mirror down.
"Shoot," I mutter to myself as I stare at my reflection in the mirror. My lower lip is red and swollen, the lipstick completely gone, or should I say licked off in this case? And then there is the trace of his small bite on the side of my jaw - still red and fresh.
Automatically, my fingers land on it, tracing the spot. The shape of his teeth is barely even there and maybe he was holding back on it, opting for sucking instead. Honestly, my mind was so clouded with lust I can't even recall. It doesn't hurt either, but still, it's there, the reminder of how much he owns me and how much I didn't mind it at all.
My fingers land on my lower lip then, caressing it, making my breath hitch.
But then, they freeze and I go numb because I'm... smiling. The corner of my mouth is turned up and my eyes are... glowing.
I realize I liked it. No, I... I loved it! I loved his touch both gentle and rough. I loved the mixture of his haunted voice and his phantom touch and all the passionate ways he made me wince and sigh at the same time. And if it weren't for Jack, I'd not stop him. I'd give in to his wicked mouth without caring about what anyone would say.
Fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
I swear mentally, something I don't usually do, but oh my Gosh, I can't be possibly happy about this. Can I? Am I sick? Whoever in the world would be happy to sport a reminder of.. of this?! I never knew I was a masochist until I met him again.
"Crazy, totally crazy, that's what you are, Mia," I tell my reflection pushing my pointer finger against the mirror to get it inside my sick head.
I push the mirror close with a loud thud and am about to start the car when my eyes fall on the huge pack of tiny Tony's Chocolonely in the passenger's seat. I bought it on my way here, to calm my nerves down before meeting him, so I've had one or maybe ten.
Connor's lost a lot of blood, didn't he? He'll need some sugar to regain his strength. When we were kids, he hated having anything sweet but Tony's Chocolonely. He'd tried it when his mother took him to Germany, I think he was around eight then, and since then he'd only eat those. So he got me into it too.
I stare at the pack with narrowed eyes, as if it's an enemy to me, which I guess it is right now. Then, with a loud sigh, I grab it and push my door open.
Before I get out of the car, I push the vanity mirror down again and press my pointer finger on my reflection.
"Crazy, totally crazy, that's what you are," I tell it before getting out and throwing the door shut.
"It's a humanitarian act, so don't even dare to say..." I stop in the middle of Connor's room the bag of chocolates and a bottle of water I grabbed in their kitchen in both hands.
He's in bed, lying on his back, eyes closed, and his bare chest moving to the rhythm of his calm breathing. The lights in his room are off, that's probably why I didn't notice him there at first. The door to the bathroom is wide open, dim light pouring out of it and helping me see my surroundings as I move closer to him.
I stop next to the bed and place both the water and the pack of chocolates on the small nightstand as soundlessly as I can, but don't rush to leave. Instead, my eyes land on him again, and my heart squeezes inside my chest.
He has one arm lying over his waist, his palm pressed against the bandaged wound as if he's hurting even in his sleep, while the other is lying casually next to his head, the pendant of my bracelet peeking from between his fingers.
I've always found people staring at the person they have feelings for when they are asleep creepy because it's like invading their privacy. But now I get it. I know why we do it.
It's because we can't get enough. Because we can't believe we are so close to that person that we can hear them breathe, because they are beautiful, so beautiful it hurts, because we want to memorize every single detail, because they look so at peace when they're sleeping and it makes us insanely happy to see that person so calm.
It's the first time I've seen the older Connor so relaxed, his guard down and so open.
After taking him in for another couple of seconds, I bend down slightly, to pull my bracelet out of his fist as unnoticeably as possible. Well, at least I'll finally get what I came here for in the first place.
I grab onto the pendant and start pulling it slowly, to not damage it either when suddenly his hold on it tightens as he stirs.
I stop breathing and freeze at the same time, my eyes landing on his face.
His eyes are closed, and he huffs in his sleep but doesn't stir awake.
Oh, thank you, Jesus, Mother Mary, and everyone above!
Still, I'm scared to wake him up with the slightest move, so I try to pull at the chain as unnoticeably as possible.
I should have just left and taken my bracelet later. Why did I come back and dig myself into a deeper hole?
"Yes!" I beam silently, clutching my bracelet in my fist once I'm out of the water, turn around with a final glance at him, and am about to leave when out of nowhere his fingers are wrapped around my wrist, and I'm pulled back and down.
"Oh," I let out a surprised yelp as I land slightly over his side and chest, my face so close to his, that our noses touch.
I barely manage to plant myself on the mattress and hold myself slightly up, not to fall on his wound. My eyes travel up to Connor's face only to realize he still has his eyes closed.
Huh?
Before I can release a mental hooray though, he buries his face in the side of my neck and nuzzles his nose in the spot where my shoulder and neck meet.
Holy!
I start to panic, my heart practically starts to jump out of my chest as if it's on a trampoline and yet I manage to stay paralyzed just like in my dreams.
Seriously think I need an Oscar for imitating a piece of furniture so skillfully.
He lets out a content sigh and then inhales, making me realize he's breathing me in.
Is this real? Please tell me it is, because if it's true then... it means that he doesn't really hate me. At least not as much as he claims to.
But what if... what is he's dreaming about someone else?
"It's you. Of course, it's you. It's always fucking you." He mumbles slowly under his breath.
"Conno_" I start to say but he cuts me off with another loud exhale.
"You know, your scent... it's addicting. It's like this mix of lilies, mint and warmth. Makes me crave it all the time. Wanna be the only man to smell it on you? Want to be the only one, Sky."
If my brain and lungs were somewhat working a second ago, now they stop their functioning all at once because this is the first time my middle name has ever touched those lips. Even when we were kids he's never called me that, in fact, no one ever has. But right now, as he utters the word with his deep voice, half drunk and half asleep, it becomes music to my ears, a spell I want him to cast over and over again.
I don't know why he's suddenly called me that, have no clue, and yet I don't think I've ever loved a nickname so much. Not even the 'Little Monster' one he's given me when we were kids. Nothing has ever sounded like this, like it was our secret, only ours.
Before I can rise from the dead and ask him about it before I can even use his drunken state as an opportunity to find out what he means when he calls me a liar and faker all the time, he plants a soft kiss on the side of my neck as his body relaxes fully and his breath evens.
My hands on the mattress give in, but I manage to regain my strength and thinking ability before falling on his wound.
I count to ten, giving myself some time to recover from him and at the same time enjoy the warmth of his body, before carefully pulling away and making a run out of the house.
Will he remember this tomorrow?
I certainly will never forget.
***
Author's Note
Yup, your eyes are not lying lol :D It's almost 2 AM here as I upload this chapter, so I hope you guys will love it and boost my energy with your votes and comments, so I can function like a normal human being and not a zombie.
Did this chapter give you a slight insight into Trouble's mind? Soon you'll see him more and get to know him better!!!!
Also, the next chapter is coming tomorrow too, so please hype me up with love maybe? XD Why? Because I managed to write two chapters in one day even when I'm working on Saturdays?
PS One thing I wanna stress is that I know that this is already the third chapter in the same "setting" and it might trigger some of you, but the thing is unlike "Midnight Memories" I've decided to make the chapters shorter, that's why you have more, BUT shorter eps here.
Another thing I want to clear out is, I love detailed storytelling. I think they are a huge part of an actual printed book, and I aim to keep writing "Trouble" as if it's a published book, not another Wattpad story with too many dialogues and no descriptions (I'm not shading any particular story because I'm not reading on Wattpad now (don't have time), but we all know that many famous stories here are like that).
I mean, of course, I'm not going to write 10 lines about a dress or a room or smth else, but neither am I going to go with a "he said-I said" concept. This is my style, I want to give you a movie experience, you know what I mean? As a reader, I LOVE "watching" a book: it's when I read a story and I can see it so freaking clearly in my head. And I want to be that kind of author for you too. The reason I've decided to explain myself and talk about this is because recently someone told me Wattpad readers don't care about it and it might push the readers away. I refuse to believe it. Just like I did with "Midnight Memories", I'm gonna give you a book you can SEE!
Anyway, I was also busy with launching the "Midnight Memories" comics on WEBTOON on Friday and the prologue is already out. It's fucking perfect, I swear, because the artist is sooo talented. I'll also be giving you more romantic Kailena AND Dylan scenes, so you might want to keep an eye out for that (more details can be found in the last update I did for MM).
The webtoon story has weekly releases (EVERY MONDAY for now, we're trying to make it more soon), so please keep supporting it with votes, comments, and shares, because if it gets big, then we're planning to turn Trouble into a webcomics too. But no promises. Let's see how it goes first.
Ouph, that was a long AN, but that's it! Have a great day today and thank you for supporting Trouble and my writing. See you tomorrow!
Much love, Mel