Heeseung has a predicament.
It’s undoubtedly something stupid for most people, but hear him out, condoms.
So, Sunghoon and him started dating some months ago and, he’s not saying they’ll use them right away, but it’s good to be prepared, right?
So the problem he’s facing is, where does he buy them? Can he just… go to a drug store and buy some? Will anyone question him? Can he be discreet enough? Would Sunghoon think he’s pressuring him if he sees the condoms? Because he’s not, he definitely wants to, but he’s a nice person, he can wait for as long as Sunghoon needs. He doesn’t need to have sex with him if Sunghoon doesn’t want to, he just wants to be prepared, in case it’s needed.
And he knows, he knows who he has to ask that will most certainly be able to help him. The thing is, he doesn’t know how to bring it up without bursting into flames from blushing. He also didn’t know how to ask without being awkward about it, how to naturally bring it up in conversation. There simply isn’t a way, and if he wants to ever get an answer, he simply has to ask.
As subtly as he can, he texts Yeonjun to please call him when he has time. Heeseung didn’t expect for his phone to start ringing right away and he almost drops it in his panic. He doesn’t, but he does hang up instead of answering. He groans in frustration and almost has a heart attack, again, when Yeonjun starts calling him again.
Heeseung manages to answer this time and he locks himself in the bathroom.
“Heeseung, why did you tell me to call you if you were going to hang up on me? Or are you busy now?” Yeonjun teased, but got a little serious when asking the second question.
“No, no, I… panicked…” Heeseung admitted, “I need… to ask you something?”
“Is… Are you okay?” Yeonjun asks, concerned.
“Yes! It’s not… it’s not serious?” He doesn’t know how to ask, it’s important, but not serious, “I… uh…”
“Hey, take your time, yeah? Whatever it is, I’m here for you,” Heeseung fidgets a little, he’s nervous, but he can talk to Yeonjun.
“I need to buy condoms.” And maybe, that wasn’t the best way to start, but what’s done is done. He can hear Yeonjun trying not to laugh. “Hyung, don’t laugh… I don’t know… where to buy them?”
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t expecting that,” he calms himself down, “I’d think you already know where, just maybe don’t go yourself? Have your partner buy them, unless they are also an idol, are they also an idol?”
“Well… yes… I’m… you and Soobin-hyung are dating, no?” There was silence on the other side, and Heeseung thinks he might have said something he shouldn’t have.
“Are we… are we that obvious?” Yeonjun didn’t sound afraid, but he still lowered his voice. Heeseung shakes his head even if he can’t see him.
“No, not really? You just gave me that impression,” because really, he isn’t sure what made him think that, he thinks it’s what seemed the most natural.
“Oh… I see, okay,” Heeseung believes he hears something akin to disappointment, maybe Yeonjun wanted to be obvious.
“So… how do you buy… them?” Heeseung insisted, he just knows Yeonjun buy them, or at the very least knows where and how Soobin buys them.
“Them?” it’s like Yeonjun forgot what they were talking about.
“…Condoms… and lube…” Heeseung hates how shy he gets, he shouldn’t, it shouldn’t matter, but he can’t help it.
“Are you… Heeseung, are you dating someone in your group?” Yeonjun asks, but really, he guesses that’s what all this is about.
Heeseung thinks it’s only fair, since he knows who Yeonjun is dating, to tell him as well, “I’m dating Sunghoon.”
“Sunghoon? Oh! We should go on a double date!” Heeseung stops for a second, he doesn’t think that’s a good idea even if it would be fun. But also, the four of them going somewhere would seem like just friends having fun together, Heeseung doubts anyone would see it as a date.
“Okay, I mean, I’ll ask Sunghoon,” he says and Yeonjun sounds happy. “But… about the condoms…?”
“Right, I’ll send you the link of the page we use,” Heeseung internally sighs and feels glad he doesn’t have to go asking anyone else. “They usually only take a few hours to deliver, so be sure to be in the dorm, unless you don’t care who sees.”
“Thank you,” Heeseung is blushing slightly, “I’ll tell you what Sunghoon says about that double date later.”
“Sure, no hurry,” suddenly, there’s loud nocking.
“Hyung, are you going to take much longer? I need to go,” Niki shouts though the door.
“Just a minute!” Heeseung shouts back.
“Heeseungie… are you in the bathroom?” Yeonjun asks amused.
“… Yes… I’ll text you later,” maybe, he should have gone outside or somewhere else, but he couldn’t really think when he answered the call.
“Bye-bye, Heeseung,” he hears Yeonjun say as he laughs before he hangs up.
He walks out of the bathroom, Niki rushing to get in, and almost instantly receives a text from Yeonjun with a link. After it, he gets about ten winking face emojis. He places an order for condoms and lube while feeling a little paranoid that someone will see what he’s doing in his phone. And if he’s honest, he doesn’t know who he’s most afraid of, if Sunghoon seeing and knowing or the members.
Talking to Sunghoon does take him a little more time. First, he needs to be sure no one else can hear their conversation, and that’s hard on itself. Then he sees Sunghoon sitting on the couch and looking at him like he also wants to talk. Like he has something to say. He, as inconspicuously as he can, sits next to Sunghoon. They spend a few seconds saying absolutely nothing and being tense, they see the other members walk around, but none of them seem to notice the awkward silence between them.
Heeseung can’t take it anymore, he needs to say something even though both of them seem to be extremely nervous for no reason. Well, he doesn’t know what Sunghoon wants to talk about, so maybe he does have a reason, but Heeseung doesn’t. So he’s going to be brave and ask Sunghoon to go on a date with him and Yeonjun and Soobin. Easy.
“Do you want to go on a double date with Yeonjun-hyung and Soobin-hyung?” He asks, voice low so he’s sure no one else can hear him. They are alone in the living room, but one can never know.
“What?” Sunghoon is confused.
“I… I asked Yeonjun-hyung… I needed some help and he said we should go on a double date.” Heeseung explains, more or less, he’s not ready to talk about the condoms yet.
“Oh,” Sunghoon is taken aback, “I didn’t know they were together.” Heeseung nods, Sunghoon holds his hand and leans a little closer, “I would love to go on a double date with them.”
Heeseung smiles softly, “I’ll tell him later,” he says, “you seemed to have something on your mind.”
“It’s… not important, don’t worry,” Heeseung doubts this, but he doesn’t want to pressure him. Sunghoon will tell him when he’s ready.
Heeseung texts Yeonjun, who is fast to reply, and they set the day for the date. While Heeseung and Sunghoon are sitting extremely close on the couch, Heeseung thinks he sees Jake looking at them weirdly, but he just walks by, so he doesn’t think much of it. Hopefully, Jake didn’t notice they are holding hand still.
A couple of hours later, what he had ordered arrives and he almost has a heart attack. He doesn’t want to admit it, but he got distracted and forgot he had even ordered anything. He tries to act as naturally as he possibly can when he goes to get it. Thankfully, the bag everything came in is discreet, but he still hides it so no one asks him what he bought. He quickly hides it in between his stuff, where he knows no one will accidentally find it.
For the most part, he forgets he even bought anything, until they go on the double date with Yeonjun and Soobin.
The date is nice, they get together to eat out, chat and have fun. They have a really good time even if they have to mostly keep their relationships on the low. Afterwards, they go back to TXT’s dorm, just so they can be more comfortable and open without having to worry about anyone seeing something they shouldn’t. Soobin tries to steal Sunghoon a couple of time, and Sunghoon finally gives up, going with him to the kitchen to look for snacks.
And Heeseung should have known, in the comfort of their own dorm, Yeonjun would ask something that would embarrass him. Even if not intentionally.
“So, did you buy condoms?” Yeonjun casually asks as they were setting up to watch a movie. The only consolation Heeseung has is that Soobin looks as embarrassed as he does. Though, Soobin seems to also be chuckling.
“What?” Unfortunately, Sunghoon is the first one to react.
“Oh! Not for now, obviously,” Yeonjun explains, probably thinking Sunghoon was getting the wrong idea.
“I… haven’t talked with Sunghoon about it yet…” Heeseung admits avoiding Sunghoon’s eyes.
A few seconds of awkward silence pass, with Yeonjun looking between a flustered Heeseung and a confused Sunghoon, “Oops?” he says and quickly turns the movie on.
“We are talking about that later.” Sunghoon whispers to Heeseung, who just nods and lets Sunghoon get comfortable cuddling against him.
For the rest of the night, everything feels comfortable. It takes a few minutes for Heeseung to fully relax. Partially because of the conversation to come, and partially because he just wasn’t used to being able to be openly affectionate with Sunghoon. Not without fearing someone walking in on them. Watching Soobin and Yeonjun be just as grossly in love as they are… it’s nice. It feels weird, but nice.
Heeseung wants to have this freedom with his members as well.
But, the date has to end, and after the movie finishes, they leave TXT’s dorm to go back to their own. On the way back, and being as quiet as they can be so the drive won’t hear them, Sunghoon brings up the conversation they had. He’s mostly certain the driver doesn’t care about what they are talking about, and he even turns up the volume of the radio, so it almost seems like he’s giving them privacy to talk.
“Hyung… what was that about buying condoms?” Sunghoon asks faintly, Heeseung can barely hear him over the music.
“I… I asked Yeonjun-hyung where to buy… condoms and lube…” He says, blushing just a little bit.
“And did you?” Heeseung looks confused, “buy them.” And he guesses that should have been obvious.
“Y-yeah… I don’t-” he chokes on his own words trying to speak too fast.
“You don’t?” Sunghoon prompts.
“It’s not- I didn’t buy them to use them,” Heeseung wants to hit himself. Sunghoon looks at him like he’s gone crazy, “I mean… not unless you want to.”
“Hyung, what are you trying to say?” Sunghoon makes a small pause, “because it sounds like… like maybe you want to… have sex? With me?”
“I’m not pressuring you,” Heeseung says first, “it doesn’t matter if I want to, it was… to be prepared… just in case.”
“But you do want to, right?” Heeseung thinks it’s quite obvious, that he is obvious, but he still nods. “Good.”
“Good?” Sunghoon nods this time.
“Uh… I’ve been thinking about… how to ask you to…” Both get flustered at the same time, Heeseung wonders how they’ll ever get to it if they are like this, but he guesses they’ll figure it out when the time comes. “So… tonight?”
“Tonight?” Heeseung takes a second to understand, “wait, you mean, you want to… tonight?”
“Yes? Is it too soon? I talked to Soobin hyung about this and-” Sunghoon stops, embarrassed he tries to hide while staying close to Heeseung. “I’ve been thinking about it… a lot.”
“A-a Lot?” Heeseung is surprised, had he known this before he would have been less secretive about buying condoms. “But the other members…”
“I’m sure we can… be quiet? I don’t want to wait until a time where we are alone at the dorms, I don’t know when that will be.” Sunghoon is as red as he can possibly get, but he seems determined. Heeseung realises Sunghoon really, really, wants to.
If Heeseung is honest, knowing Sunghoon wants him as much as he wants him, he doesn’t think he can wait until that happens either. He was okay with waiting when he didn’t know how Sunghoon felt about it, but now that he knows, how can he possibly resist? He knows it’ll be awkward and probably hard making sure no one hears anything. He knows they should talk more about it, but the desire between them is a little too tangible between them now. He swallows, nervous and excited.
“Okay,” he mutters.
Even if the driver heard anything, he doesn’t mention it. He doesn’t even comment on how red they both are. When they get back to the dorm, they quickly check everyone else is asleep. Unfortunately for them, Niki is not, so they hold back until he does eventually fall asleep as well. Heeseung takes that time to get the condom and lube, and attempts to have a conversation with Sunghoon about how things will go. A very red Sunghoon admits to his fantasy of having sex against the front door. Heeseung thinks that’s not the most romantic first time, but if that’s what Sunghoon wants he’s not going to deny him.
After the first time, they figure out a better way to decide when they are going to do it. They also decide it’s better if both wear a condom just because it creates less of a mess. It saves them the trouble and embarrassment of having to clean certain things from wherever they are doing it, like the door.
At first they are shy and afraid of being caught, so they don’t do it often. They become bolder and louder with time, they lose the fear as no one seems to notice anything. Or so they think, Heeseung is honestly surprised because they could be pretty loud sometimes. They start discussing telling the group about their relationship, they think it’d be nice not having to hide that part of themselves to the others.
And then, one morning, Jay brings up the loud moans they keep hearing at night.