(Derek's P.O.V)
"Why are you mad at me?"
I decided to take the direct approach.
Although Kitkat thanked me, it was simply customary. There was no warmth in her words. She was drawing a line between us subtly but problem was I knew her.
I knew Kitkat enough to pick up on her actions and mirco-expressions. Because she had me obsessing over her every word, every move, every touch without my knowledge.
And I knew what she was trying to do.
She would do it slowly enough that I might not realize until it was too late that she was shutting me out and pulling back her walls. Walls I'd put in conscious effort to break.
Lila stared at me and shrugged. "I can't remember. Must have been something trivial."
"Liar." I whispered against her ear and she shivered much to my delight. Then I straightened back up.
I eyed her critically, "Do you think I'm stupid?" Then quickly, "Actually, no, don't answer that." I sighed as I saw her close her mouth and snicker.
"Lila Adele Smith."
Kitkat gave me a dry look but I saw her grey eyes waver.
I softened my eyes, "Why are you shutting me out?"
Surprise flickered over her features for a nanosecond before she blanked her expression. "I'm not. You're thinking too much."
I wasn't but I decided to concede for the moment.
"Alright, let's believe that lie for a while." I pursed my lips and then nodded towards the porridge. "Eat."
Her already fair skin looked paler and I itched to touch her and nurse her back to health.
"How do you know all this?" Her expression was blank but her eyes were guarded and I sighed internally.
"I was the one who usually took care of my sister if she was sick and vice-versa. So I learnt a thing or two." I shrugged as if it wasn't a big deal.
She nodded, "That's useful."
Useful.
These are not the responses I'd expect from Kitkat. I'd expect her to tease and roast, not shut down every topic of conversation.
But then she added something as she ate the porridge and I was surprised. "Your future wife or ex girlfriends must've been lucky."
I tilted my head and a frown creased my forehead. That was random and weird.
Sure if someone else said the same thing, I wouldn't bat an eye. However, coming from Lila.....
Something about girlfriends and wives and complimenting me? Yeah, no. Something was definitely wrong.
"Well, I'm glad you realize my value. You should keep me hidden from others then."
She slowed her chewing at my remark and gave me a critical once over, her lip curling. "Wouldn't just killing you be a better alternative?"
She went back to earing but I stood still.
That wasn't a joke. It wasn't like the many times Kitkat threatened me in a playful manner.
The expressions might be the same but I could just feel it instinctively that Lila actually almost meant her words.
Worry twisted its lazy claws inside of me and my stomach sank.
Okay. Let's change the topic. Might have better luck there.
I tamped down the hurt and grinned. Fake as it was, it was still my signature facade.
"Same as ever, Kitkat."
She paused and I smirked victorious at the tightening of her features.
"Anyways." I breezing continued, watching her face attentively. "Do you know Mayor Welsh was arrested this morning?"
She glanced at me, "Oh?" She didn't seem surprised and I filed away the information.
So suspicious. My crush was so suspicious.
She looked around and I figured what she was looking for so I grabbed her phone from her table and gave it to her.
She took it wordlessly and I was suffocating at the tension, the awkwardness I could feel with her right now.
Kitkat was my distraction, my obsession, my mysterious crush. I never felt awkward with her.
Kitkat got busy with her phone and finished the porridge simultaneously.
She reached for the biscuits but I stopped her. "Don't eat too much or you might throw up." I reprimanded. "Take it slow and easy."
She rolled her eyes.
Awkward silence pulsed between us and I broke it. "How do you feel about it? I heard Veronica was in a bad state, throwing a tantrum and all that." I observed her, folding my arms over my chest well aware it would emphasize my muscles.
"I guess she had it coming."
That seems true but..."All their assets were frozen and some confiscated too." I looked outside where the sun was already setting. "She might be going from riches to rags."
A wry smile inched up Kitkat's face and then vanished just as quickly.
I felt more than a little frustrated.
I looked around her room again. Having cleaned it, I'd come across weird trinkets and books but nothing really truly out of the ordinary. The walls were bare, only painted a light lavender and white.
"How did you get your tattoos?" The sudden question from Lila made my eyes snap to hers.
I stared at her before answering. "At a tattoo shop."
She gave a deadpanned look and I felt my mouth twitch in a familiar sense of elation. But deciding not not push my luck too far today, I answered her sincerely.
"I liked how they looked." Simple, to the point and sadly true. I didn't have a story behind any of my tattoos. The snake one looked cool, just like the flames.
So I had them done.
Oh, it'd been very painful but....well the end result was satisfying and above all that....it made me fit into the group where not a single guy was without tattoos.
So yeah, that might have been the main motivation but to tell Lila that would be too much information.
Lila nodded, "So it wasn't to fit in?"
I startled, "What?"
She didn't repeat herself, looking out of the window but I was already aware of her implications.
Well, I guess considering how smart Kitkat was, it wasn't really a big surprise she figured it out.
The good thing was she wouldn't know where to fit in I took the step.
I felt my muscles tighten as I replied, "A little."
Her eyes had a glean in them, something wry but I couldn't concluded much from it. Deciding this was going nowhere, I though maybe I should leave Kitkat to her own antics.
Striding towards the door with sure steps, one hand in pocket, fiddling with with lighter and the other about to touch the door handle when Kitkat's voice stopped me in my tracks.
"Who gave you that lighter?"
I stilled and I could hear the pounding of my heart. Licking my lips, I slowly turned to face her.
She stared at me, eyes guarded, expression blank and now I was feeling more than just ambiguous. Yet, I decided to let her in.
"It was a gift." I leaned against the door, the distance between us like a string pulled taunt as Lila tilted her head.
Her messy loose hair slid along her shoulders, the duvet pulled up.
"From who?"
"My ex."
She gulped and I was starting to see a pattern here.
She was interrogating me.
But why?
"Did you love her?"
This was going into dangerous territory and I had the time to think what answer I wanted to give her.
I'd never lied to Kitkat, come to think of it. I just withheld the information but never lied.
And it felt like my answers right now were monumental to how our relationship would be going forward so I swallowed my suspicions and my questions, instead humming thoughtfully.
If someone had asked me this question before I met Kitkat...I'd probably have said yes.
But Ana and I had too much baggage. Sure, things had been great before I knew who she really was. However it didn't mean things had been the same afterwards.
I'd thought I was in love but then Ana had gone from only an understanding, mischievous girl to a jealous bitch who threatened and harmed.
When I stopped going to the fight club she'd introduced me to, that had been the first fissure in our tumultuous relationship.
And then came Roy.
"Well?" Lila's tight voice brought me back to the problem and hand and I rolled my shoulders thoughtfully, meeting her grey eyes.
"No. I liked her, I won't lie. A lot. She was.....important to me." I slid the lighter out and played with it, not breaking eye contact with Kitkat whose expression had darkened slightly.
"But love? I thought I had. Until..." My stare intensified and Lila and I remained locked in a battle of wills where I almost spilled my feelings to her. More than that, I was almost about to associate the word love with my feelings for Lila.
Tension strung us both tightly and felt palpable. She gulped, her expressions flickering so fast I couldn't keep track.
Anger. Hurt. Guilt. Pain. Uncertainty. Relief.
The last one had my Kitkat radar thinking she might be interested in me.
"Well, until I realized I didn't." I cleared my throat, finishing the sentence.
Kitkat looked away and we remained silent.
Then, "Was it a gift?"
"It was."
"Can I have it?"
I blinked as she raised her chin almost challengingly and perplexed, I tilted my head, clutching the lighter and running an uncertain hand through my dark blue hair.
"Have it?"
"Your ex gave it to you, right? Shouldn't you have cut off every last connection you could possible have with her?" She rose a fierce brow, her eyes sparking with intent
"Are you jealous?" I asked, amused and leaning forward with embers of hope sparking to life in my chest.
"If I said yes, would you give it to me?"
She was hell-bent on having this lighter for reasons I couldn't fathom. Either she hated Ana which could be only if they knew each other and I highly doubted that. Or simply because she was interested in me and felt territorial.
The latter made me grin.
"I knew you were interested in me, Kitkat. I'd give you the world if you asked for it." I languidly grinned and her eyes shuttered.
"Well, I'm not interested in the world." Haughty and rolling her eyes, Kitkat extended a hand with expectation.
"Just me, then?"
I chuckled and slowly walked closer, my eyes never straying from hers.
In the meantime, I put my thoughts together.
The lighter held memories and it had been like a grounding object for me. I did cherish it. It wasn't like I didn't think of throwing it away at times but then the good outweighed the bad and I was very addicted to fiddling with it.
But I don't think I needed this object from Ana to keep myself sane and distracted anymore. To think of good times and feel relieved and happy.
Because Lila was already my distraction.
And I had new friends, a happy environment and a fresh life I was really liking.
Ladenhill was a town I was growing to like and I had Warren, Michael, Nora and even Rebecca to keep me company. Had a mahogany haired girl I called Kitkat and a badass fighter called the Wildcat. A few mysteries of solve.
What more could I want from life?
So yeah. I think it was okay to part with it.
"Here you go. Have at it."
I dropped the lighter in her hand, feeling a strange sense of guilt roll over me.
It was the last piece of Ana I had aside from the constant hounding on my phone from her and Roy and her lackeys.
It was a piece of my good parts during my worst times.
And it was time to bid it farewell because hanging on to things and memories would never allow me to discover a better future.
Smiling a bit ruefully, I eyed the object in Kitkat's hand before she closed her fist around it.
"Don't smoke again."
Her voice was low and it felt like she would curl into herself if left to her own devices.
I chuckled and looked outside her window.
"How'd you know?"
It was yesterday and I was pretty sure I didn't smell of cigarette smoke.
"I didn't. Now I do." She shrugged indifferently but I looked at her in amusement again.
"Smart girl."
She snuggled into the covers and slid down, her eyes drowsy looking. "I know I am."
I paused, "Feeling better?"
She waved the lighter in my face and then slid it under the covers.
Damn the lighter is closer to her than me–
Am I being jealous of an inanimate object right now?
I mean I'm jealous of the bed and the spoons too then—
"Very." She yawned and got ready to sleep. Her eyes fluttered open as she looked up at me and my heart thudded inside my chest.
"Thank you."
Did answering those questions and giving her the lighter do the magic for real? But how?
"Anytime, Kitkat."
She opened her mouth then closed it as if she had something she was debating whether to say or not. I hovered close, waiting for her to make a decision.
"You guys are over, right? You broke up with Tatiana, right?" Her question made my eyebrows hit my hairline.
I nodded, itching to placate her and detecting the tremor in her voice. The desperate eyes she turned to me.
"We're over. It's been a year now."
Feeling uncomfortable about the topic and noting something very suspicious, I was well aware of how I needed to organize my thoughts.
I got up again to leave despite not wanting to but then she caught me wrist and with eyes unsure, tugged my closer.
I went with it.
Again.
How many times had she stopped me from leaving?
Lila Smith wasn't an unsure girl but that's all I was seeing today.
And gods be damned if I'd let someone else got to see her like this.
"Someday.....will you tell me how you met her?"
I rose a questioning brow.
"Your ex girlfriend. Ana." She cleared her throat, eyes drifting away.
I stared down at her and bent to brush a hair behind her ear. Lila's breath hitched as her eyes opened and the vulnerability I saw there made my words stumble out without thinking.
"Yeah, Kitkat. Anytime you want."
A beat passed where the sound of horns and chatter, children's laughter all filtered in. The sun set lower and I exhaled.
But I felt this was the right time so I brought up my little observation.
I cocked my head to the side, "I never told you her name was Tatiana though. How did you know?"
Lila blinked, "I said her name?"
I nodded slwoly, already able to predict where Kitkat planned on taking this conversation.
She shook her head, "You must've misheard."
"Is that so?" Narrowing my eyes momentarily, I met her metallic grey stare with my copper one.
She held it.
But we both knew I'd caught her slip of tongue.
It was on me now when I'd grill her about this and today I was giving her leeway because she was sick.
Lucky girl.
Switching the conversation to a lighter topic was my Forte and we needed it.
I grinned teasingly, "You're interrogating me so thoroughly. Isn't it because you've realized your feelings for me after I tended to you so nicely?"
"Yes, of course. I realized I hated you a lot." She narrowed her eyes and let go of my wrist.
I missed the touch but chuckled at her retort. "I think I like it when you get jealous."
"Then you haven't seen me getting actually jealous." She flashed me a smile that was sugary and there I saw a glimpse of my Kitkat.
I smiled triumphantly. Her words weren't my main focus. The fact that she was indulging me was.
"I look forward to see you being territorial, Kitkat. I bet you'd be cute."
"I have no reason to be jealous of anyone associated with you." She continued cooly, "Least of all someone you ended things with."
Her dig at Ana made somehow stroked my ego. I was making progress for sure. I'd made her do a 180 and I was awesome as hell.
Was that smugness I detected in her tone?
I rose a brow, "Why, it seems you've fully recovered."
She huffed and glared at me. "Get lost."
"Only if you ask nicely." I winked.
"Go die."
"Mmm, you can do better."
"I'll send an assassin for you tonight, sleep tight."
"Aw, but I want you to be my killer. At least we'd get some action in before my death." I fake pouted.
Lila stared at me as if I'd sprouted a second head.
"How are you always like this?"
"Like what?"
"Flirty. Playful. Teasing. Easy going." She stopped me before I could answer, "And I know better than anyone that you have your demons but..." She frowned.
I smirked and changed the topic, aware I'd said too much for one day, "It's talent, Kitkat. I could teach you if you want."
She grumbled, "What's the price?"
"Spend one night under me." I winked playfully but I truly wished nothing more than that.
Her eyes flared and she glared at me but the venom was almost gone now much to my delight.
"You've taken that price in your dreams where I'm under you."
"Fuck." I groaned dramatically. "That's true but dreams are different that reality, sweetheart."
"And reality says I'm off limits."
"Good thing, reality and I never got along."
I winked at her and she turned her face away.
But I felt lighter than I had since this morning. It'd felt like I'd gone through a year of grueling emotions.
"Are you even a bad boy?" Her words sounded muffled because she'd buried herself under the covers.
"Are you even an average girl?"
"You seem to think otherwise."
She retorted as if it was a foreign concept to not look at Lila Smith and think of all the mysteries hiding in her grey eyes and dark curls.
Because I was sure of that much, especially after today.
I only had more questions about her than answers and it felt like she'd be forever shrouded in mystery, wrapping me around her finger and sucking me right in.
I laughed satirically and answered her as best as I could.
"I'm as much a bad-boy as you're an average girl. So I suppose that answers both our questions."
•♤•
A/N
Guys, Guys, Guys, a LOT happened in this chapter I think. I'm afraid the emotional switches weren't smooth but rather rushed so please tell me if that is the case.
What do you think of Lila's interrogation and insecurity? Her slip about Tatiana? How Derek dealt with all of it?
What are your opinions on the Lighter being taken by Lila? About Derek's attitude throughout while deal with Lila?
About Lila's switch in temper? We'll get to know her pov soon so don't worry but yeah.
The banter like old days in the ending?
I'm rushing to finish if it's possible before August 19th so yeah.
Vote, comment and share! Thanks! Till next time then!
~Skyler