"Thirdy, would you remember me next year?"
"Of course, I would!"
"Would you remember me in the next five years?"
"Naman! How could I forget my long time crush?!"
"How 'bout in the next ten years?"
"Of course. We'll be married by then,"
"Knock knock?"
"Who's there?"
"Love naman!"
It kept on replaying inside her head. She wasn't bothered by it. She was visiting her psychiatrist, after all. Not until memories of them continued to haunt her even in her dreams. She would often wake up in the middle of the night catching her breath and will end up crying herself to sleep. It's been going on for years. Her psychiatrist couldn't do anything about it anymore. She almost emptied her bank account by traveling just to forget.
She couldn't forgive herself for what happened so she decided to lock herself inside the room. She blamed herself. She relived the pain day by day, minute by minute. She started pushing people away until she was only left alone in the dark. She would cry in the middle of her meals. She would breakdown in the middle of taking a shower. Everything reminded her of him. Even herself.
"Bei? Tita Det cooked your favorite ulam. We.. left it here outside. Kunin mo na lang pag nagutom ka na," every single day, she would hear her friends knocking, asking her to eat. For years, they never got tired. They make sure they would visit her in her home even if they had games.
Her friends never got tired of her. Maddie, Kat, Deanna, Dani and Alyssa would often knock. Sometimes, it would be SJ, Gian, Tyler or Kiefer. She rarely gets out of her room. She locked herself in and never talked to anybody.
"Bea?" She looked at the door when she heard a knock. "This is your papa.. I'm with your mama and manong," Her tears fell as she heard Bong's manly voice.
"We got you something, anak. It's here outside your door lang. You can get it if you want," It was Mozzy. She stared at the door, tears streaming down her face.
"We're leaving now, anak. We'll go to the hospital.." Bong said. "I love you, 'nak." She fell on the floor as Mozzy and Bong bid their goodbyes to Bea. She stopped when she heard Kiefer.
"Hey, Bei.." She went close to the door.
"It's been a long time. We miss you here. It hurts to see Ly and the others cry in front of your door," Kiefer paused. He wiped his tears with his palm. He sat down and leaned on Bea's door.
"Bei, if ever you're blaming yourself.. please, don't. It was an accident. No one's mad, Bei.." Kiefer swallowed hard, as if there was a lump in his throat.
"We're waiting for you, Bea.. please.." Kiefer couldn't continue what he was trying to say. Bea stared at the door, waiting for Kiefer to continue.
"Please, come back to us.." Kiefer couldn't help but to cry loud and hard. He didn't care if Bea was listening. All he wanted was to lessen the weight on his chest.
"Manong.." She called, in between her sobs.
"Bea.. Bea? Bea, what is it? Are you fine now? How are you doing?" Kiefer panicked. He couldn't believe that Bea was talking to him.
"Please, be patient with me.." Her words made Kiefer cry more.
"I will, Bea. I will wait. I promise," That was enough for Bea. From that day, she fixed her self. Little by little, she was getting better.
"Bea?" She heard a knock. She immediately went close to the door. It was 12 in the midnight.
"Happy birthday to you.." They started singing. She smiled but her smile didn't reach her eyes. She was holding her tears back. She held the doorknob for support. Her tears fell as she heard how her friends and family cried loud and hard because of her.
"Happy birthday, Bea. We miss you," it was Loel. After that, they fixed themselves to go down. They were preparing to talk to Bea's door again. They don't care if she's awake or sleeping.
"Blow the candle, Amara.." She stopped walking when she heard her daughter's name. She was about to go to bed but she turned back and held the doorknob.
"Yehey! Happy birthday to your mommy Bea!" She heard them cheering. "Happy birthday, Mommy." It was her daughter's voice.
She swallowed hard.
Kaya ko na ba? Handa na ba 'ko? She brushed her thoughts off. She wiped her tears and took a deep breath.
She opened her door.
Everyone was shocked. They turned their gazes on Bea with swollen eyes. They couldn't believe that Bea's standing right in front of them.
"Bea.. Oh my goodness, Bea.." Elmer was the first one to recover. He immediately enveloped Bea for a hug. Loel passed the cake to somebody before joining the hug.
"Bea, my daughter.." Elmer cried. He couldn't believe that Bea's now in front of them. He couldn't believe he was hugging her daughter. He cried that he forgot Bea's voice already.
Everyone was crying their hearts out. When Det recovered, Elmer and Loel gave her way to hug Bea. She looked at her the same way she did when she first saw Bea.
Her hair grew longer. Her eyes became more chinky, maybe because of crying. She looked like she never aged.
"Isabel.. My Isabel.." Det cried harder when she hugged Bea. "Good lord.. My Isabel.." Bea looked around. Her teammates were hugging each other. Sj, Tyler, Gian and Kiefer were all hugging their girlfriends. Isaac and Anton were standing meters away from her, crying silently.
This was what she left. She left everybody. She realized how painful it was for them to lose her and Thirdy. Her eyes fell on her little girl who was being carried by Maddie.
"My little girl.." Det gave way for Bea. Maddie was crying while watching Bea reach for her daughter.
"That's mommy.. Your mommy Bea," Maddie cried harder as Bea carefully carried Amara. Zolo immediately hugged Maddie.
"Hey there," Bea greeted.
"Hello, mommy.. I've been waiting for you.." Ibinaba ni Bea ang anak sa lapag. She lowered a bit so that Amara and her could be the same height.
"I thought you locked yourself in because you didn't want me. I thought you left because you were mad at me," Amara started crying. Bea was confused. She looked at Maddie. She knew that Maddie has been taking care of Amara. Sakanya n'ya binilin si Amara bago magkulong.
"Hey, Amara.." Maddie calmed herself down before sitting beside Bea, facing Amara. "Mommy never hated you. Mommy loves you. It's just that.. everything was hurting mommy, 'di ba? And-"
"Mommy is in great pain that she needed to be alone.." Bea's tears fell again. Her kid understood her situation at a very young age which hurt her a lot. She was guilty that she left Amara alone.
"Yes, Amara. Mommy loves you. She doesn't hate you, okay?" Pagpapaliwanag pa ni Maddie kay Amara.
After that small talk, Amara faced Bea. She started crying harder which made Bea panic a little. She gently held Amara in both of her arms.
"I love you, mommy.. You're so pretty.." Amara hugged her. Everybody started crying loud again.
"Let's be together now, mommy.." Her daughter begged. She couldn't give her an assurance. Instead, she held Amara's hand and went downstairs. Everyone followed.
Amara was sitting next to her. Everyone was seated in the living room, waiting for her to talk. They were trying to contain their cries. They wanted to hug Bea so bad.
"Pa'no ko ba sisimulan 'to.." She scratched her head. Some chuckled with tears still streaming down their faces. "Hehe, uhm.."
She looked at them, one by one. Her eyes stopped at Dani for a while. The youngest Ravena's face reminds her of Thirdy. But she was confused. It didn't hurt her. She smiled.
"Hello," she greeted them. Some gave her a small wave, some smiled, some remained silent, waiting for her to continue.
"First, I'm sorry for disappearing.. Sorry for pushing everybody away," She looked down.
"I know that all of you guys.. understand my pain. But, I'm sorry for not being with you guys. I know the accident ruined us, but I chose to carry everything alone. I'm sorry for running away," they began crying again. Remembering what they've been through hurts them a lot. It was like the pain came back in a snap.
"Thank you to everyone who raised my little girl.." She glanced at Amara. "Thank you for making her understand things. Thank you for giving her the things I couldn't give when I was gone," she smiled.
"Thank you for loving her as her own," This time, was talking to Maddie and Zolo. They became Amara's parents when she ran away. They raised Amara as their own. They taught Amara how to understand things even if she was only four. They taught Amara the things she was supposed to learn from Bea.
"I'm sorry for what happened. Thank you for patiently waiting for me. Thank you for being there for me and Thirdy-" Her words were cut off when a man barged in to their house, panicking.
"Amara? Where's Amara?" All of them turned to the man who entered the De Leon's home. "Mama, where's Ama.. There you are,"
Bea froze on her seat. She watched how Amara ran in to the man's arms. She couldn't believe what was happening in front of her. She blinked multiple times. She even secretly pinched herself to know if it was real.
"I've been looking for you, baby.. Why didn't you tell daddy that you're leaving?" He asked the little girl. "Last year, hindi ka rin nagpaalam. Naabutan na kita ng umaga na kauuwi lang,"
"Sorry, daddy.." Ngumuso pa ang bata. He smiled and hugged her. But he froze as well when his eyes landed on Bea who was watching them silently with wide eyes. He gave her a small smile.
"He.. Hello.." Bea stuttered.
Everybody was holding on to each other like they were fighting for dear life, afraid of what the man would answer. Everybody was wishing that he would remember her. But it their hopes fell apart the moment the man answered.
"Hello there, miss. Do I know you? Ngayon lang kita nakita,"