i avoid robin for the rest of the school day until the lunch bell rings
or does he avoid me ??
i dont really know
i walk out of 3d period and start walking towards the lunch court
i'm half way down the hall when someone pushes me into an empty classroom which causes me to lose my balance and fall
i quickly look up
" what the fuck finney " i say getting up
" shh " he says looking outside of the classroom door window
" what is it ?? " i say standing behind him
" vance was walking out of a classroom and he was walking your way " he says
" oh my god then obviously he saw me you dumbass " i say sitting on the teachers desk
" he was looking down " obviously " " he says mocking me
" mm have you talked to robin " i say looking at finney who's still loooking outside the classroom door
" gosh your so paranoid " " if he was looking down then he didn't see us so theres no need to still be looking through that door " i say rolling my eyes
" maybe im hiding from someone too " he says walking away from the door
" who ? those three boys again finney because i'll kick their asses again " i say standing up
" no leah " he says laughing
" donna " " the girl i'm working with on the project in period 1 " he says shyly
" oh you mean donna your soon to be girlfriend " i say while making kissing noises and getting all into his face
" your so ' Pathetic ' leah get away from me " he says laughing
" have you talked to robin at all today ?? " " he didn't show up for 1st period " i say looking at him
" i haven't " " and i thought you didn't like him " he says
" what the hell i don't " i say
" so kicking vance's ass for him and running away while holding hands is supposed to mean nothing ? " finney says standing up
" i was just helping a friend " i say standing up too
" hm well lunch is gonna be over in 10 minutes so we better get going " he says opening the door and walking out
i walk out after him and we walk to the lunch court together
i see robin and i see vance sitting at their own tables
normally i would go sit with finney and robin
but i look at robin and walk over to sit next to vance
" hey vance " i say winking at him
' gosh i hate doing this but it's for the best i guess '
" talk to me again leah and i'm gonna beat your ass " he says looking at me
very clearly pissed off
" gladly " " i said hey vance " i say
" oh ? bold are we blake " he says
standing up
" well than let's go somewhere else " he says while pulling my arm and we start walking
i didn't mean for this to go this far
holy shit
i really don't like vance hopper and i definitely don't want to kiss or anything more than that
i must have had a worried expression on my face
because
i feel someone else's hand grab mine and it pulls me away from vance
" what the fuc- oh robin ? back for a round 2 already " vance says smirking
" leah obviously doesn't want to go with you di- " before he could finish his sentence i put my hand over his mouth and whisper
" i'm not gonna save your ass again " and then i pull away and look at vance
" after what leah said at the lunch tables i think she does want to come with me, both ways " vance says smirking and winking at me
i feel robins grip around my arm get tighter
" let's go babe " vance says
i turn to look at robin and you can just tell by looking at him that he's about to try AGAIN to kick vance's ass
" you piece of shit ! leah doesn't like you an- " i cut robin off by pressing are lips together
i pull away and look at robin then at vance
robin let's go of my arm and so does vance
i kinda expect robin to do something else but he scoffs and walks away from me
and so does vance
robin
i scoff and walk away from her
i sit back down with finney
" i thought she didn't like you " finney says
while drinking milk
" she's giving me fucking mixed signals "
" robin she just kissed you and you think that's mixed signals " " she was obviously just hanging out with vance to piss you off " he says
" yeah why then ? huh what did i do for her to go and do that ? "
" ask her about it " he says
" no if she wants to do that then i can do that too "
leah
the bell rings
i start to walk over to 4th period when i spot finney walking towards me
" listen if your here to lecture me about robin i dont want to hear it " i say while walking
" you kissed him leah ?? i thought you didn't like him " " what happened to liking vance hopper ? " he says
" if i tell you can you promise not to make a big deal out of it " i say while we both walk into fourth period
" promise " he says while sitting down next to me
" yesterday me and robin were walking to the store and he stopped me and told me- " i pause does finney know ??
" uhm that he liked me but as he was saying it i saw the damn fucking black van i've been seeing all week come around the corner " " and something is seriously off about it " i say
" so i walked away from him and walked all the way home " i say
" but why walk away from him ?? " finney says clearly confused
" because i can't risk whoever is in that van seeing me with robin and kidnapping him " i say
" but if- " he's cut off by the teacher
" Robin Arellano and Lily Ryan is there something you would like to share with the class ? " she says while raising her eyebrows
i quickly turn to look at them and i can see from the angle i'm sitting at that their holding hands
" no no we're sorry " lily says trying not to laugh
" fine " she says sitting back down and writing on some paper
" what the fuck " i say pissed off
i look at finney then raise my hand
" miss austin " she says looking at me
" can i go to the restroom " i say with some attitude
i'm still pissed
" we have an attitude dont we ? no you cannot " " you should've went before class " she says smiling and looking back at her papers
i look at finney
" no leah stop " he says trying to get me to calm down
i get up
walk over to my teachers desk
grab the hall pass and start to walk out
i'm at the door way when she says
" excuse me young lady where do you think your going ? "
" to fucking smoke in the bathroom " i say while walking out and flipping her off
i see robin look at me while i walk out
" someone get me a referral from the back now !! " she says
( that's all ?? 😭😭 )
i walk into the girls bathroom and lock the door
i pull out my lighter and cigarette and light it
someone full on bangs on the bathroom door
" fuck off or i'm gonna kick your ass " i say yelling
" let me in leah " i hear someone say
but i can't quite make out who
kinda sounds like finney
i unlock the door and open it
i see robin
and i start to close the door in his face
but he pushes the door open and walks right in
i shut the door
and hop on the window ledge while still smoking
" what do you want " i say very very clearly pissed off
" you didn't tell me you smoked " he says avoiding my question
" yeah well we clearly didn't tell eachother a lot of thing right ? " i say rolling my eyes
" i guess not " he says walking over to me
" give me it " he says while holding his hand out
" no ? " i say laughing
" this is my last one and your not gonna burn it out " " or throw it away " i say
" yeah well i ran out so give me it " he says still holding his hand out
" wait you smoke " i say handing him it
" surprise " he says while smoking it
" you smoke but don't drink ? " " your weird " i say as he passes it back to me
" i do both but i just didn't want to get drunk on you and bruce's anniversary " " he would've killed me too " he says slightly laughing
" what do you mean he would've killed you ? " i say confused
does robin know bruce ??
" i knew bruce leah " " everyone did " he says
" but not like i did, no, i knew no sport bruce
bruce who hated baseball " he says
" bruce hated baseball once ? but that would mean you would to have known him when he was.. when he was 9 or 10 " i say
talking about bruce is somewhat sensitive for me
i miss him everyday
i wake up hoping bruce would be there to walk me to school like he always did
" yeah we were friends for more than 10 years " " bruce always talked about you " he says looking up at me
" he hated that you fucked up your life leah
he hated that you were sad, you smoked, you drank,. you snuck out " he says
" but bruce snuck out with me, he drank with me, he smoked with me.. he did all that shit WITH me ? " i say confused
" you really don't get it do you ? " he says scoffing
" he was fucking in love with you " he says
" no.. no your fucking lying ! your lying robin "
" he was in love with you and left him leah ! "
we're both yelling now
" i didn't have a fucking choice ! i had too ! my mom made me she made me like this ! i'm like this because of that crazy whore ! "
" your like this because of your self leah " he says lowering his voice
" i was once in love with him too, but he made it clear he didn't feel the same way " " but you can't be in.. in love with someone who's- " i cut my self off
" dead. "
i finally say the words i've been pushing to the back of my mind when i think of bruce
" you can't be in love with someone who wasn't in love with you when you were 10 and who's dead " i say sitting down on the bathroom wall
" but i'm alive leah and i like you now "
( he did not just diss my bae brucy like that
☠️☠️ < bruce btw ☹️☹️ )
"what happened to lily ? you sure can get over girls fast " i say scoffing
" what happened to vance ? you sure can get over boys fast " he says looking at me
" i never said i liked you so technically i'm not getting over boys fast " i say looking back at him
" so kissing me doesn't mean anything " he says sitting down next to me
" well then " he says while grabbing my face and kissing me
we pull away from eachother
" your so annoying robin " i say while rolling my eyes
" you know you like me back " " just say it already " he says laughing
we're holding hands
" fine robin arellano i lik- " im cut off by the door swinging wide open
and i see my dad walk in with the principal behind him
i quickly get up
" leah get your ass in the car " he says furious
i don't even look at robin as i'm walking out of the bathroom
but i do see finney pop his head of 4th period
i just look down
because i know and i think finney and robin know too
that when i go home
im gonna wanna never go there again
we get in the car
i like expect him to punch me or do something at least but he doesn't
he just drives home
we pull into the drive way and i get out and wait for my dad to unlock the door
he does and lets me go in first
we get inside and he shuts the door
and i feel two hands push me to the ground and turn me around and just start going at it
punching my stomach
punching my face
slapping my face
he's just beating me
after what feels like about 30 or 40 seconds he stops
and just leaves
to go back to work i guess
i can't even move
i dont feel like it
everything hurts
i just curl up in a ball
and cry
i lay there crying for about maybe 5 or 10 minutes
before i finally get up
and walk to the bathroom to clean my self up
i brush my hair
and clean up my bloody nose and lip
i walk over to gwen's room since she stayed home today but she's not there
where is she ??
i walk over to the kitchen to grab some ice for my face when i see a note on the counter saying
" im feeling better going to suseys because she stayed home too i'll be back around 8:30, gwen "
i sigh with relief
and walk over to my room
and lay down
i'm so tired and weak from getting my life beat out of me
so i fall asleep
———————————————————————————
god damn goodnight yall wtf
my hands actually hurt now
but bruce in love with leah ?? 😱😱
words : 2267
time : 3:42 am
thoughts ??