Chapter 1
Moving for the first time was a scary, but refreshing, change. It also meant a fuck-ton of driving. Specifically, 31 hours, but who's counting, right?
Sorry, I can't pretend. I was. I was counting. It was an exhausting three-day journey, guys. Especially with mom coming along. I appreciated her help and company, but listening to five hours of oldies and nearly dying from second-hand smoke weren't my ideal travel conditions. Did I mention it was my car and I was the one driving?
Despite the annoyances, my excitement never dimmed. Our surroundings changed with each day – and I could not get enough of it! From flat hills and highways to a rockier landscape foreign to my virgin eyes. On the final day, with only a few hours left, the scenery helped welcome me to a new reality. The roads turned hilly, the trees became massive, and the gaps between them displayed some gorgeous valleys. It was hard to believe this would be my new home. Who would have thought Oregon, a state you never fucking hear about, would be so beautiful?
We entered the small town of Bellport just after 6:30. It was located right on the coast, which I was super hyped about. I've always wanted to see the ocean. I've always dreamed of swimming in the ocean! I couldn't wait for both of those! If only my new roommate and guardian wasn't my busy-bee older sister. Pulling into her vacant driveway was a pretty good indication that I was basically on my own. Yeah, not exactly the 'welcome home' you would want, but it was the one I expected at least.
"Liz is probably still at work," mom said.
"She probably didn't want to help us unpack," I said, stepping out of my car.
"I'll go find the spare key. I think she told me where she hid it."
Having never seen Liz's house before, I was fairly impressed. It was wide, two-stories, and was a pretty gray blue color. It also had two symmetrical sides. There were two mirroring front doors and a bay window on each side. Why you may ask was there two of each? The house was a duplex and split into two units, with hers – now ours I guess – on the right. Man, that would be hard getting used to calling it my house too. I bet it would take a while for it to feel like it too.
Since she owned the whole house, she's been renting out the left half to a friend from her work. No doubt our neighbor was the one responsible for the yard work. That was the only explanation for the immaculate front yard. Liz wasn't the type to get her hands dirty (or anything dirty). Yet the grass was freshly cut, and flowers hugged the long wooden the porch.
Someone who pulls weeds and fluffs the mulch like this would probably burst with joy helping me haul my shit inside. Ugh, if only this ambitious neighbor was home. I would walk my merry ass up to the left door and offer them a deal of a lifetime: move my shit in for me for free so I didn't have to. I would at least shower the sucker with praise and gratitude.
After mom found the key, it was time to get to work. We opened the back door of my crammed black car. I caught a few loose nick-nacks before they tumbled out, but don't worry though. It was just some books and nothing that needed to be hidden. My embarrassing old stuffed animals and my vibrator were strategically packed at the bottom of a box nobody would open. Yes, I'm ashamed to say I put them in the same box, but what do you want from me? I didn't have the time to worry about guarding two boxes.
Since Liz was offering me the guest room, I didn't bring any furniture or need to. Thank god for that too. Because when mom and I headed inside and saw the stairs directly in front of us... talk about a fucking mountain, guys.
"Mom, why don't you just set everything at the bottom, and I'll haul it—"
"Josephine, stairs won't kill me. You should be more worried about me racing past you."
"I just figured you may want to rest after the long drive." Or how about those stairs will kill your weak-ass lungs?
"I'll be fine honey."
So, mom helped me carry all my things upstairs. No idea how because we both wanted to collapse by the time we were done. That's one thing I would not miss about my mom: her carelessness. That carelessness extended to her health too. She still smoked and drank like she was in her 20s and not coughing her way to 50. She had the same dark thick hair and thick brows as me, but her vices, stress, and age made the lines in her face more prominent.
Liz 'conveniently' came home just as we finished unloading my car. Despite being late though, we excitedly greeted each other. She annoyed me sometimes, but I really did miss her. Probably much more than she missed me. My sister and I didn't have a strong connection, but hopefully living together after all these years would help. However, I knew not to get my hopes too high. She was 29 with a demanding job and the rarity of a social life. If that didn't display how different we were, her straitened dyed blonde hair, and sleek manicure sure did.
Eager to visit, we sat down in the living room to the right of the stairs. The open area was cozy, with a lavender accent wall and gray hardwood floors. Other than that, the furniture, end tables, and large area rug was all white. Yup, white. I couldn't help but cringe when mom, with a glass of wine in her hand, sat down on the snowy sleek couch. I swear, she had a secret reserve of Merlot hidden somewhere on her at all times. She mysteriously pulls it out of every time she's about to relax. Her being as klutzy as me didn't help my nervousness.
"Jos, how does it feel to be graduated?" Liz asked from the comfy chair across from us.
"It's only been a week or so, but it doesn't feel different. Instead of being stressed about high-school exams, I'm now stressing about college exams."
"You need to start college first, sweetie," mom smiled.
"I could just not start college at all," I half joked.
"Are you sure? Don't you want to party it up?" Liz interjected teasingly.
Oh, did I ever. "You got me there. College parties I'm very excited for," I grinned.
"Just don't get pregnant like I did. That's you're one rule," mom added.
"That was always the one rule," Liz scoffed.
"Trust me, you guys don't have to worry about that with me."
Based on my all A's and academic awards in high school, you never would guess I was an outgoing trouble-maker. That's right, everyone. I was a wild animal in disguise. Well, more like a hamster that escaped it's cage.
I liked to have fun and party when I could afford to; I would occasionally skip school if nothing important was due, and have a blast with my friends. But I always made sure I made it home. Other things always came first before me. It had been just mom and I before, so there always needed to be at least one responsible adult. Now, she had to be that adult.
With leaving home, with college on the horizon, I was coming first for once. I just hoped she would be okay. She was probably talking out of her ass, but she insisted she would be okay. Anything to get me to college so I could 'have an easier life' than she did. If she hadn't pressured and pushed me to go, I would have stay anchored with her back in Illinois. It was the one time I was grateful that she was pushy. I'm not enthusiastic about college, but – and I say this with shame – it was my secret key to freedom and finally putting my happiness first.
"Liz, how's the real-estate life going?" Mom asked, taking a sip of her wine.
"Incredible. Like absolutely unbelievable. Today, I had a double closing, right?" Liz said, crossing one leg over the other as she relaxed into the white leather chair. "One was for a client that bought a house in a private gated-community along the coast. You guys should have seen this house. It was gorgeous. Having two in one day, and that expensive one, will be a very pretty penny."
"Raking in the big bucks now. That's exciting!" I smiled.
"It really is. It's just a lot of work. Oh, that reminds me. Jos, I know you just graduated last week, but I would get a job as soon as possible. I don't want you to pay rent or anything, but tuition out here compared to back home is no joke."
Pshh. As if I wasn't already shaking in my boots about money. "Believe it or not, I already got a job here. Applied online, did the interview online, and I told them when I would be moving here."
Not going to lie: I would prefer not working right out of high-school. The few scholarships I received would cover some of my expenses, but much had to come from loans. I wasn't as worried about it as they were, but then again, they cared more about me going to college than I did. Right now, I cared about having fun this summer and exploring my new home. However, I was responsible. I didn't exactly sweat, shit, or piss money, so my compromise was getting a part time position. It was enough to not go broke and just enough to help with college.
"Really? That's awesome. Where? Please for the love of god tell me you're not going to be a waitress again."
She could bite me. "I will at least know what I'm doing. It's some restaurant called Sullivan's I think? I start in a few days."
New state, new house, new job. Maybe I'll run down to the pet store and buy four lizards and a cat while I'm at it. All of this would be an adjustment, that was for sure. For how stagnant my life has been, it filled me with both anxiety and immense excitement. I was finally living the dream and being independent. And I planned on taking full advantage of that, of my new life here, by having a fun-filled summer! I never had time to focus on my wants and needs, and while it felt weird, I was already looking forward to it!
Mom was flying home early tomorrow, so after we had a quick dinner, she went to bed early in the other guest room. With me and Liz alone now, the air felt... awkward. It's been nearly ten years since we've lived together. Since then, we only saw each other a few times a year thanks to the distance. Clearly, we would have to learn how to be more comfortable with each other again.
"When are we going to throw a massive party to celebrate my arrival?" I asked.
"This is it. Can't you tell?" she said, gesturing around the room.
"The decorations are on point. But where are the drugs?" I joked. There. That was a pretty good start I guess to break the ice.
"Already up my nose." She chuckled and stood up. "Come on. I'll show you where everything is."
The floor-plan was quite open. The living room led right into the kitchen towards the back of the house. She showed me what was in each cabinet, the pantry – bingo, she had pop-tarts – and every closet. The dining area took up the entire left side of the gray and white kitchen, with a small round table in front of the sliding door. I couldn't help but smile when we slid it open and stepped onto the deck.
The night sky overlooked the wide backyard that had a few scattered pines along the edges. Then beyond her spacious property was a grassy field and eventually woods. That was my favorite part about living here already, the wide-open forests that surrounded this town. Not even back home could you see such dark skies and such deep terrain.
"Are there any good trails around here?" I asked as we stepped back inside.
"Um, I think there are some in the woods across the street. There are trails all over. Some even lead out to the ocean from here."
I smiled in giddy excitement to myself. "I didn't realize we lived that close to the ocean."
"Well the coast isn't in sight obviously, but if you still hike and run as much as before, you should easily be able to reach it from here."
"I'll definitely have to check those out."
Leading me back through the living room towards the front door, she rounded the stairs and nodded up to the wall it hugged on the left. "This is the shared wall between us and David's unit. Obviously your room at the top is against the same wall, so just try not to be too loud."
"Don't worry, I won't be."
"Feel free to make the room your own. Paint it, do whatever. I want you to feel at home here and I want you to be comfortable. Try not to scuff up the furniture though. The dresser, headboard, and end tables are brand new."
Huh. I didn't realize I was a destructive six-year-old.
Directly across the top step was my bedroom. To the right was my bathroom, the other guest room, then finally her master bedroom towards the end of the hall. The four rooms faced the back of the house, so across the hall was nothing but the railing that overlooked the downstairs living-room. Honestly, I could dig this. Except for one thing I noticed earlier....
From where we stood in the hall, I glanced to the fifth door. It was adjacent to mine and connected to the shared wall. "Could you tell me why there is a door into the other unit?"
"I'm not sure. Some weird safety precaution I guess. I always make sure it's locked.
"I bet whoever installed this was a dirty fucking pervert. Peaking in on their neighbors whenever they wanted."
"You're probably right actually."
The remainder of the evening was spent unpacking. It was just me, my snack of pop-tarts, and all the clutter we hauled into my new room. There was nothing but the sound of crickets from the cracked window and the breeze. The silence was so strange. I could barely here any cars when they passed by either. It was peaceful and relaxing for a chance (even though a few gnats snuck through the screen to admire the lamp light).
I started with the dresser and attached mirror that was against the shared wall. After putting my clothes away, I set out my perfume and jewelry box. But don't worry guys. I was super careful not to scratch the surface since the dresser was so new. I just hope the deranged nut-case in me can handle such pristine new furniture.
Unfortunately, I kept catching my reflection in the mirror. Pausing, I studied my strained eyes and my resting smile. I don't know if I've ever just has an ongoing casual smile. I was so excited to be here, but around others, I did my best hiding just how much. Not only was it something new, it was something better. It allowed me to escape life at home. I just hope she'll be okay without me. That was all I kept thinking. Though he was sweet, not even the 'love of her life' Tony could be the same crutch that I was.
Choking down another bite of my pop-tart, I took a deep breath and got back to work. Across from the dresser was the queen-sized bed, positioned in the middle of the wall. After switching out the white comforter (yes, the dummy had more white) with my maroon one, I moved back to the wooden floor to unpack more boxes. Then more and more boxes until the exhaust forced me to call it a night. I planned on spending tomorrow unpacking and organizing anyway.
The bed was so comfortable. Days of driving, especially driving through new terrain that put me on edge, exhausted the shit out of me. I don't think I ever fell asleep so fast. But I didn't just fall asleep. I fell into an incredibly vivid dream. And I mean vivid.
I was in my new home. In this very room. In the bed I was currently sleeping in. Everything was the same, every detail matched. From what I was able to see anyway.
No idea why... but I was sitting up from under the covers, hands propped behind me. My new room was dark, but the window to the right of me was open. It allowed a sliver of light into the room, illuminating the tan curtains that danced in the breeze. It illuminated nothing else, leaving everything in the shadows – except for something even darker than the dim room. A dark shape in the corner.
What was that? I stared across the room at the still shape. Last I checked, I didn't have any furniture in the right corner between my dresser and window. But there was something in that corner. I squinted past the fluttering curtains... until my eyes grew wide.
It was a silhouette of a man. Someone was standing in the corner.
He must have realized I saw him. He gently stepped forward, allowing me to see more definition to his shoulders. The sliver of light allowed me to see his dark eyes and enticed smile when he took another step towards the end of my bed. Those dark eyes now classified this as a nightmare. They were playful, cunning... predatory.
"You're an interesting turn of events to my day. What's your name?" he asked.
I don't believe I answered. The air was so heavy, his voice was heavy, and I don't think I could. There was just a swirl of fear and an air of seduction emanating from his obscure shadow. He took another relaxed step towards the bed, making him more visible. I couldn't help but notice he glanced out the open window as if curious. Then those eyes that stood out took in some of the boxes on my floor.
"Alright doll... speak up. Where did you come from? I take it you just moved here."
I was frozen in fear. Strangely, it started to get more hazy – until he reached the side of my bed. He was standing there, next to where I was sitting up. Despite how vivid, how real this was, I still could not see him well. He was shrouded in shadows. Except for those eyes that were pinned down on me. Then, he delicately unfolded his fingers and offered his palm.
His voice was silk, but in a deadly manner. "Take my hand, miss."
"What if I don't?" I finally belted out.
"Then you don't," he said, lowering his hand. "I won't be as gracious if you don't at least tell me your name though."
The tension, the sense of danger... was building and becoming overwhelming. My labored breathing was the only sound between us. Frozen, I was engulfed in fear. It was too much. Too much! Bolting up from the bed, I tried running, fleeing from my room.
Then, it was over.
My eyes opened and my heart was pounding. I shot up in bed, realizing it was just a dream. It was just a dream, but damn, the detail – and the fact that it was took place in this room, in this spot – was creepy. Jesus, it's been a while since I've had such a realistic dream. Actually, this one seemed more than realistic. I don't think I've ever had a dream like that. Must been just how stressed and tired I've been or something. I didn't let it bother me though. Many of my dreams were vivid and random like that.
Also like many of my other dreams, the details faded as soon as I went back to sleep. It was a meaninglessly dream. I just wish it had stayed that way.
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Here we go, guys!
I'm sorry it took so long to start this story. It's been almost a year exactly since I finished my last book, and I did not expect it would take this long to officially start posting this one. But I really wanted to prepare and be ready for this story and sort everything out, which is what I've been doing this whole time. I've never prepared as much as I have for this book. I'm really into it - and I really hope you guys will be too!
This will be unlike any story I've done before. I have certain themes and patterns in all my books, but this is definitely different territory. I am also continuing to work on my flaws. Like overdoing it with detail. I think there is a big change, but I want a good balance and to not strip it down too much. Let me know what you think of how I'm doing!
Anyway, I am open to any input, anything you've noticed, liked or didn't like. So please leave your thoughts, ideas, guesses as to what may happen! Or any theories too!
I am very excited and enthusiastic about Josephine's story and I truly hope you enjoy it! Thank you guys for reading and it should be an exciting ride!