Shashini woke up holding her forehead because of a hangover.
"Shit.." she cursed and turned to her right side.
Tablet and water were already placed on the table.
After sometime she came to the dining room and saw Jayesh and Alexander waiting for her.
"Good morning Sweety." Alexander said.
"Good morning." Jayesh said.
"Good morning." She replied and sat opposite Jayesh.
She noticed his face which was dull and his eyes were red in colour with dark circles.
"Jayesh is also coming with us to the office sweety." Alexander said.
She just nodded her head in reply.
Time skips
Office
Shashi didn't mind Jayesh's presence as she was fully concentrated on her work.
After the lunch as usual Shashi went for a walk in the estate because people wouldn't work after 2.00pm.
Even though Shashi knows that Jayesh is following her, she doesn't mind him.
After sometime she sat on the bench which was near a tree.
"Can I sit here?" Jayesh asked.
Shashi nodded her head while looking at the field.
"It's been 2days Shashi. Whenever I try to come near you, you're moving away. I need to talk with you." Jayesh said casually.
"There is nothing to talk about with you." Shashi replied casually without turning her head towards him.
"Do you know why I'm here?" He asked.
"I know and it's not going to happen." Shashi said.
"Why didn't you tell me that you're not Hasini?" Jayesh asked.
"Before I could confess the truth you throwed me out of your life." Shashi said with a bitter smile.
"So tell me, are you here because you felt guilty or you fell in love with me?" Shashi asked in a sarcastic tone.
"Shashi...."Jayesh tried to speak but he was interrupted by her.
"It's Deva Hasini for you." She said.
Jayesh nodded his head.
"I misjudged everything. I was angry because Krish suffered so much and at the end he lost his life. So I thought..." before he could finish Shashini spoke, " So you thought Hasini should suffer the same pain."
Jayesh nodded his head and said "I know it's wrong but I did everything because I Love my brother so much."
"But after knowing the truth I feel ashamed of myself." He said sincerely.
"I know just a sorry can't fix anything but I don't know what to do to fix everything correctly." He said.
"I have made a huge blunder. I shouldn't have spoken with you like that. I swear , I had no idea I would fuck up my beautiful life with my own plan. I know you're angry with me. I'm not saying I'm right and my acts were right. But I'm sorry. I will do anything...." once again she interrupted and asked " So you will do anything to solve all our problems? Will it make everything the same as before?"
"I don't know but I will try my level best to make everything right." He said.
"I'm not angry with you. Not even a bit. I just left that place because I don't want to hurt you with my words because you already lost your brother and some or the other way I was related to that. " she said.
"Tell me Shashi, what do you think? Why are you not angry with me?" Jayesh asked, holding her hand.
"I don't have to explain anything to you." Shashi said and tried to remove her hand from his hold.
"No.. you should tell me." He said without leaving her hands.
"Last night you heard everything right, then what?" She asked and Jayesh left her hand in shock.
"I checked the CCTV footage of the lawn and I saw you and Alex pa were talking about something then you hid behind the tree. Then I said something. At last I cried then you took me to my room." She said in anger.
"Shashi we just did that to know what you're thinking and wanted you to speak your heart out." Jayesh explained.
"He's an old man who wished to see his daughter living her life happily so he did that but what rights do you have ?Who are you?" She asked.
"I want to fix everything Shashi... " he said.
"Nothing can be fixed. You wanted to know about my pain right. You wanted to know my reason right. I will say." She said.
"I'm angry with myself. Everything was going smoothly until you entered into my life. Everything has changed suddenly. You have changed everything and I'm a stupid women who let you to change everything. I have never felt this way before like I do now. I have never trusted someone blindly but once I did and ended up in pain which is going to stay with me for the life time. I believed you like a fool and that makes me upset. I'm not angry with you because you divorced me. I'm angry with myself for trusting you , believing you and loving you unconditionally. You fooled me and I don't know what to do, and this is driving me mad. My life is so messed up." She shouted while her eyes filled with tears. His eyes too.
"I Love you." He said and hugged her suddenly.
She was startled and stood there without moving for a minute. Then she harshly removed herself from his hold and slapped him without thinking for a second. "What kind of sick drama are you trying to do this time?" She asked in anger.
"No Shashi.. this is not a drama." He said while holding her hands.
"When this love came? Ohh you love me because you feel guilty?" She asked sarcastically.
"No Shashi... I started to love you before our wedding but I was a dumbhead and it took me so much time to understand that. Yes, I feel guilty for hurting a good soul and I should have thought before taking the decision. I'm sorry for what I did. Whether it is Hasini or Shashini I don't care. I love you. But this love is not out of guilt Shashi." He said while tears streaming down his cheeks.
"No I won't believe all this bull shit and I will never fall in your trap once again." She said.
"Believe me Shashi... you don't know how hard it was for me to give those divorce papers to you. Sometimes I thought to forget all the past and lead a happy life with you but I couldn't do that and spoke those mean words and sent you out of my life." He said.
"Jayesh please leave.. I'm not in a mood for all this drama because I had enough of your lies." Shashi said while controlling her anger.
"Give me any kind of punishment Shashi but please don't leave me because I can't live without you. I'm keeping all my guilty feelings aside and asking this for the sake of our love." He begged.
"There is no ours. I loved you but you faked it. Coming to the punishment I don't want to see your face so please leave." She said and started to walk towards the car.
"Shashi..." he shouted but she didn't stop.
Jayesh closed his face with his palm and cried loudly.
Time skips
Jayesh came to Shashi's room
"Shashi.. please I want to talk with you." He said.
"Everything is over. What is left to discuss?" She asked while turning her head aside.
"I know I made a mistake. I should've told you before itself about my brother and about my love. I'm really sorry for that. I tried hard to tell the truth to you but I couldn't. I thought you would leave me after knowing the truth." He said.
"So you're afraid that I will leave by myself before you could throw me out of your life." She asked in anger.
"No.. Shashi.. it's.. it's not like that." He tried to explain while holding her hands.
"I left without a word on that day because you don't deserve to know the truth. I don't want to hurt a person unnecessarily because I'm not like you." Shashi said in anger.
"I'm sorry Shashi. I really love you. I just lied that I don't love you." He said and held her hands.
Shashi remembered that day and her blood started to boil in anger.
"Let me go!" She tried to get out of his hold.
"No... I won't leave you." He said.
"How dare you come into my life after what you've done to me? I didn't say anything when you came here because I don't want to create a drama in front of Alex pa. But now get out of my house. I came here to have some peace so please don't try to ruin it." She shouted in anger and pain.
Jayesh left her hand and moved back.
"I will wait Shashi.. I will wait until you forgive me. You have all the reasons to push me out of your life but I just have only one reason to want you back in my life and that is love. I'm sorry for hurting you with those mean words and giving divorce papers. I promised not to leave you and I will always keep my promise. " he said and left her room.
'You're promises are fake.'Shashi thought.
After sometime Alexander came to her room and sat beside her.
"You won't forgive him at all?" Alexander asked.
"How could you expect me to forgive him pa? He broke my heart and all the promises he gave me. He doesn't know what I experienced in these 3months. His sorry can't fix anything. Once broken is broken. I love him, but that doesn't mean I should accept him if he feels sorry for his mistakes." Shashi said determinedly.
Alex sighed and left the room.
Next day early morning Jayesh left after informing Alexander.
When Alexander asked him to stay for a few more days, Jayesh said, "She needs time, sir. I can't expect magic to happen easily. I hurt her a lot and I have to heal her slowly. I will come next week."
Then Jayesh went to Shashi's room and sat beside her. He caressed her hair and kissed her forehead.
"I'm sorry Shashi and remember I will always love you." He said and left the place.
Jayesh remembered how Shashi would smile whenever he kissed her forehead while she was in the deep sleep and her worry lines would disappear after his kiss.
Shashi came to the dinning table around 9.00am
Alexander was reading the newspaper.
The maid started to serve breakfast.
Shashi noticed that Jayesh was not there but she didn't ask Alexander anything.
Now and then her eyes moved towards the entrance of his room and Alexander noticed that.
He said "Jayesh left as per your wish."
Shashi nodded her head and thought 'he just tried for once and left. I know he just came here because he felt guilty.'
Keeping her thoughts aside she started her work.
"Excuse mam.. there's a parcel for you." One of the estate workers gave the parcel to her.
Shashi opened that parcel and found a small plastic flower bouquet with a letter.
"I'm sorry Shashi. I know you asked me not to come in front of you so I sent this bouquet. I know you're not interested to hear whatever explanation I'm going to give but I'm determined to prove that my love is not from guilt.
I don't know whether you remember or not but I still remember the first time when you smiled on our first date. That moment my heart skipped the beat. You may ask how it is possible because I came with a marriage proposal to take revenge but after all I'm a human Shashi and that moment I didn't remember about those revenge.
When I held your hand for the first time on the beach I felt a jolt of electric current passing in me. That evening when I carried you in my arms you just snuggled into me and I felt something warm with your gesture.
- Love you Shashi. "
Shashini read this and a small smile crept on her face unknowingly but the next second she kept the letter and the plastic flower bouquet in her table drawer and continued with her work.
After that, every day a letter will come with a bouquet or with chocolates. The letter starts with an apology and the moments they spend with each other then ends with love you Shashi.
Shashi will just read the letter and place it in her drawer.
One week later....
It was Friday evening
Shashi heard a dog barking in the lawn. She came to the lawn and saw Shishimaru running around a tree.
"Shishimaru." She said in shock.
As if knowing her presence, Shishimaru stopped playing and ran towards her.
Shashi scooped him in her arms.
He started to lick her cheeks and nose.
"I missed you so much." She said and hugged him.
"You became a big boy Shishimaru." She said in amusement.
She remembered something and turned her head as expected. Jayesh was standing in one corner of the lawn.
He came towards her.
"Shishimaru missed his mumma, so I brought him here." Jayesh said.
Shashi didn't say anything and went to the living room.
Next day...
Shashi was sitting on the lawn after dinner and Shishimaru was sleeping in her lap.
Suddenly some covered her with the blanket.
She thought it was Alexander and said thank you without turning her head.
"It's ok." She heard Jayesh's voice.
Jayesh sat beside her.
"Sorry Shashi." He said.
"Stop sending those letters Jayesh. I'm not interested in anything." Shashini said calmly.
"I know I shouldn't have played love games. I shouldn't have treated you that way. I shouldn't have used love for my revenge but the promises I made were true Shashi." He said.
"Trust is the base for any relationship. You broke that. Our relationship started with a lie. Everything was a lie." Shashi said and her tone was coated with sadness.
"Yes, I was acting initially but slowly I started to live with you forgetting all my acting. Like how Hasini's characters started to fade and the original Shashini started to live with me." He said determinedly.
She looked at him with shock.
"I did everything because I don't have a choice. I wished not to give divorce you but I gave in because I don't have a choice." Jayesh said while tears filled his eyes.
Shashini was just looking at him.
Jayesh moved towards Shashini and kissed her forehead.
"Love you Shashi." He muttered and moved to his room leaving dumbstruck Shashini with Shishimaru.
After that Jayesh didn't approach Shashi and Sunday night he returned back to Chennai
From Monday once again the letter started to come.
Monday - " You always look gorgeous in sarees."
Shashini rolled her eyes in annoyance after reading this.
Tuesday - "I always admire when ever you sit in that small swing which is in our balcony while reading a magazine."
'What? Seriously?' she thought.
Wednesday- "I thought you're a soft spoken person when I saw you being silent when those aunties asked you unnecessary questions regarding your marriage but when I saw you slapping that student and professor I was stunned. I was stupefied after hearing your warning. You just killed it."
'He saw me.' Shashi was shocked.
Thursday - "I always liked to carry you to the room whenever you doze off in the car."
Friday - "Mostly I used to forget that Hasini is my brother's ex. I will forget all the revenge and live in the moment."
Friday evening Shashi saw Jayesh entering the living room.
Shishimaru ran towards him. Jayesh took him in his hands.
"I missed you so much, " Jayesh said while looking at Shashi.
Shashi frowned.
"I.. missed Shishimaru and that's why I came here to meet him." Jayesh said.
Shashi ignored him and went to her room.