Trailer made by: @Graceisnothere
- Pandora -
Ashton was an idiot.
But he was my idiot.
And I couldn't help but love him.
Even as I sat in Math - pouring over the multiple quadratic equations in my textbook - I couldn't help but think of him. I knew he had music right now, and I could just imagine him beating on the schools cheap drum-kit, beads of sweat glistening on his forehead.
The mere thought nearly sent me flying over the edge.
"Pandora, can I be your partner?"
Snapping back into reality, my eyes met those familiar green irises, his lips tugged upwards into a sheepish grin. I took a quick glance down at my textbook before nodding, feeling extremely confused.
What the hell was going on?
Michael beamed before shifting into the empty chair beside me, his leg briefly brushing against mine. I was relieved to find that his touch no longer had any effect on me, meaning I could stop feeling ashamed of myself half of the time.
Ashton was now the only guy for me. (Unless Zac Efron decided to randomly hit me up, which was unlikely to happen)
"So, what are we doing?" I frowned, taking a curious glance around the noisy classroom.
Everyone was now in pairs with a whiteboard between them, their eyes locked eagerly upon the blackboard. Following their gaze, I found myself face to face with a large quadratic equation, causing my eyes to widen.
The fück was I meant to do with this?
"Are we meant to solve that?" I coughed, receiving a curt nod from Michael "How?"
"Were you not listening?" He chuckled, raising his eyebrows sceptically.
I felt my cheeks flush a gentle shade of pink before I sheepishly nodded, averting my gaze towards my lap. I wasn't used to feeling this confused in class, and it scared me. I was completely and hopelessly lost.
"Don't worry," he sighed, shooting me a soft smile "I'll just do it."
I let out a shaky sigh of relief before gentle leaning into Michael's shoulder, attempting to show my appreciation. He briefly rest his head upon mind before getting to work, his pen flying quickly across the whiteboard. I remained completely oblivious to it all as I studied the opposite wall, Ashton constantly running through my brain.
Did he miss me?
Did he like me?
Was he thinking about me too?
These were all questions I would probably never know the answer to, and it sucked... A lot.
"I'm done." Michael finally declared, running a hand through his pale blonde hair.
I briefly nodded, taking a curious glance towards the multiple scribbles scrawled across our whiteboard. None of it made any sense to me, but as long as it was right, I didn't really give a shít.
"Thank you Michael."
"You should really stop thinking about him."
I paused, my eyes nervously shifting upon Michael's. He was slightly smirking, as if he knew exactly what I was thinking, and I could help but feel slightly uncomfortable.
"What?"
"Stop thinking about him." He repeated, slightly louder than before "It will only upset you."
"How do you know?" I frowned, subconsciously playing with the ends of my long blonde hair.
He just shrugged, his lips parted into a humoured grin.
"I'm smart."
"Oh really?"
"Hell yes."
I let out a soft chuckle before glancing towards out whiteboard, studying Michael's messy writing curiously. It still looked foreign to me, but something about it gave off the whole 'I'm fücking complicated but I'm correct' vibe, and I had a lot of faith in Michael's mathematical abilities.
"Seriously though, what were you thinking?" Michael questioned, his elbow lightly digging into my ribs.
I shrugged, nervously chewing on the corner of my lip. Confessing my feelings to Michael could be extremely relieving, yet it could cause a lot of unnecessary tension, and I wasn't emotionally or physically prepared for that shít.
Better to just keep quiet.
"Pandora." He moaned, elbowing my ribs for the second time.
"Michael." I mimicked, causing his cocky smile to fade into a grumpy pout.
"That was cold."
"Sorry."
"I am severely hurt."
"Sorry."
"Stop saying sorry."
"Sorry- Shít sor- Shít!"
"Its fine," he chuckled, lightly shoving my shoulder "but seriously, are you okay? Has Ashton upset you again?"
"What? What do you mean again?" I laughed, raising my eyebrows questioningly.
Michael sighed, seeming slightly annoyed by my response.
"It's a recurring theme with you two. Ashton fücks up, you forgive him, you last a couple of days, Ashton fücks up again. It's a vicious cycle that neither of you seem to break."
"Well, he's not upset me." I assured, ignoring Michael's previous comment.
He was true, yet I didn't want to admit it. Ashton - although hot headed and dramatic - was an extremely sweet and caring guy, and if he could just show his friends that side of him, then maybe they could finally understand my affection toward him.
"So what has he done?" Michael frowned, his eyes narrowed sceptically.
I sighed, running a hand through my long blonde hair. Although a good friend, Michael couldn't keep a secret for shít, and once he knew how I felt, the whole group would. I didn't know if I was ready for that type of commitment.
"Come on Pandora," he cooed, his green eyes full of sympathy "what's he done?"
"Nothing." I growled, becoming increasingly agitated by Michael's questions.
Why did he have to be so nosy?
"I know it's not nothing," he continued, pressing the matter further "please just tell me."
"Michael-"
"Please?"
I let out an exasperated sigh before turning to face him, ignoring the large grin tugging at his lips. He seemed so pleased with himself, which - although slightly cute - really píssed me off.
"Promise not to say anything?"
"To who, Ashton?" Michael scoffed, rolling his bright green eyes "I'm not fücking stupid Pandora. Of course I won't."
I nodded gratefully before diverting my attention towards my nails, studying the bitten ends. I really had to stop chewing them, but it was a difficult habit to break.
"It was at lunch," I began, my cheeks flushing a gentle shade of pink "when he told you 'we're not even dating'. I don't know why, but it just really hurt me, y'know? Like I just gave this guy my freaking virginity a couple of nights ago, and now he's acting as if nothing's happened! I'm just scared he's- Y'know. Regretting sleeping with me."
Michael paused to absorb my words before replying, his voice thick with knowledge and confidence.
"It's Ashton, Pandora. Y'know how he can be."
"No I don't, actually!" I frowned, slightly angered by his response. I was expecting some Doctor Phil type shít, not this "He's too complex to even begin to understand! One minute he's declaring his love for me, and the next we're arguing about fictional fücking characters. His moods change so fast they give me fücking whiplash Michael."
"Well, I can assure you, he likes you." He sighed, shooting me a reassuring smile "He just finds it hard to express himself sometimes."
"Sometimes?" I snorted, softly shaking my head "The only time he truly expresses himself is when he's playing his drums, and even then I'm not allowed to watch him."
"You're not allowed to watch him?" Michael chuckled, raising his eyebrow questioningly "Really? Why?"
"Some shít about being nervous," I shrugged, not bothering to elaborate "he just refuses to play them in front of me."
"I can never get him to stop."
I let out a soft laugh before quickly silencing myself, the teacher's voice echoing around the noisy classroom. She requested for all boards to be held up and Michael immediately grabbed our own, holding it high over his head as if he were proud to finally know the answer. She took one look at our whiteboard before frowning, shooting us a questioning glance.
Shít.
"Michael," I hissed, my voice lowered to a whisper "put the board down."
"Huh?"
"Put the fücking board down."
His face contorted into a mixture of hurt and confusion but he done as I asked, slowly placing our whiteboard back down onto the table. I let out a relieved sigh as the teacher's eyes shifted towards another pair of students, her heels clicking noisily against the laminate flooring.
"Why did I have to put the board down?" Michael finally questioned, attempting to hide his annoyance.
"Because," I sighed, wishing I didn't have to elaborate every single thing I said to this blonde haired kitten "I think we have it wrong."
"Impossible!" He exclaimed, adamantly shaking his head "I done it myself!"
"Michael-"
"Fine, I copied it off of Daniel."
I opened my mouth to reply but quickly shut it again, allowing myself to laugh instead. All this time I had thought Michael was some extremely smart äss kid, when in reality he was just copying off of Daniel.
"Why?"
"Because I didn't know the answer and wanted to impress you," he groaned, shooting a disgusted glance towards the blackboard "I mean, really? Who the fūck actually knows how to answer this shít?"
"Not Daniel, that's for sure."
A humoured laugh escaped Michael's lips as he wiped the answer from our whiteboard, wiping the remnants of the ink against my arm. I let out a small gasp before gently shoving him, causing his smile to grow.
I had to admit - although slightly awkward - hanging out with Michael was lot of fun. He was just so natural around me, and that was something I never felt around Ashton. His movements were always so hesitant, as if he were scared to hurt me. And I understood that he just wanted to protect me, but if he couldn't allow himself to relax around me, how could we ever have a relationship?
"Pandora, can I ask you something?" Michael softly questioning, his eyes focused intently on the vandalized desk.
My chest tightened nervously at his sudden change of mood, but I nodded anyway, going against my better judgement. I knew that this was bound to be some random âss awkward question that would ultimately ruin the whole 'relaxed friendship' we had going on - because it always was - but I couldn't bring myself to say no. I couldn't reject Michael - again.
"Yeah."
"Why do you like Ashton?"
I paused, my lips parting to answer before automatically shutting again. In all honesty, I didn't have a proper answer to his question. All I had were feelings and experiences, and they were not that easy to describe.
"I don't know," I sheepishly admitted, awkwardly scratching the back of my neck "he's just... I don't know. He's Ashton."
"Exactly," Michael frowned, his fingers slowly tracing over the graffiti littered across the wooden desk "he's Ashton, the guy who bullied you since Kindergarten."
"You bullied me too." I reminded, causing his frown to deepen.
"I know, and I regret it every day, but I was never as bad as Ash. I never- I never intended to hurt you."
"Look Michael, what are you trying to prove here?" I questioned, not bothering to hide my annoyance "He's changed, just like you have."
"But he hasn't, has he?" He frowned "He still hurts you."
"He's only upset me a couple of times Michael!" I scoffed, biting the inside of my cheek to refrain from yelling at him "He's not exactly jáckass of the year."
"Look, I'm just worried about you." He sighed, finally noticing my annoyance "You're in a toxic relationship, and I just want to save you from getting hurt."
"I'm not even in a relationship!" I exclaimed, only a second away from completely losing my chill "Now can we please just drop it?"
Michael's lips parted to respond, but he quickly stopped himself, averting his attention to his lap. I silently thanked him before returning my attention to the blackboard, studying the large quadratic equation with disgust.
It was still completely foreign to me, but anything was better than speaking to Michael right now.
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I Am sO UPSeT ABouT tHe nEW LogO YOu Dont unDerStaND
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- Esmerelda 💜