Things are a bit better these days. The stupid group project is over and our stary animals campaign is a huge success. We by now have given twenty-three dogs and we've fifteen dogs in our care near school parking lot. I just hope they lead a better life now.
I'd to meet our English teacher in interval, I'd some doubts. So Susan and Emily left for cafeteria and I went to the teacher.
It didn't take much time. So after being dismissed from there, I went to the cafeteria to join Susan and Emily.
I was entering the cafeteria with my lunch when I tripped. Everyone around me was laughing, obviously. It wasn't a big deal, I know, but the image of me lying on the ground crying as a child and Neil and his minions laughing flashed in my brain.
I immediately got up and left the cafeteria in hurry. I headed straight to the washroom. By the time I reached there, I started feeling breathless. I washed my face, I seriously wanted to run away, I felt sick.
I left the washroom and called my mom, to come and pick me up.
When she showed up, it wasn't such a big trouble to convince my mom that I was sick...my pale appearance was convincing enough.
***
It's been three days since the cafeteria fall but I still haven't gathered up the courage to go back. Things are difficult and scary out there, I'm still pretty well aware that I won't be able to fool my mom for long, I've to resume school someday.
"Haze, you sure you don't want me to call the doctor?" My mom asked, as she was leaving for work.
"I'm fine mom, maybe I'll go to school tomorrow, maybe."
"Ok then, take care and call me if you need anything."
"Ok mom, bye."
It was raining outside. I sat by the window and watched the water droplets slide down the glass.
When Amanda first time gave me the title 'the geeky weaky', I didn't even understood what it meant. I just understood that it hurts.
It's strange, no? How even tough years have passed and even though I haven't talked to any of them for a while now, they still have so much control over me. I don't even know if they remember all that bullying thing now.
I don't even know if any of them were there at the cafeteria that day but they're still what scares me the most.
We say that we can't hold time, that it never stops......and a lot of things like that.
From what I've experienced, I feel that seconds may have passed, clocks' hands may have travelled a lot, the calendars may have got changed but what has happened, whatever time has done....never passes. The wound may've became a scar but that doesn't mean it stopped hurting. This makes me wonder, is it even right to say that time has passed, when you find absolutely no difference about how you feel ?
I'll go school tomorrow, face them. I'll shiver, I'll panic but not going won't make a difference anyways. I don't have an alternate option, I can't avoid this my entire life.
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This was a small one, hope you guys enjoyed :-)