Chapter 13: The Confrontation
Victoria Abbel's Point of View
I looked at Trevor walking towards the two police officers. Hanggang ngayon ang lakas pa rin ng tibok ng puso ko dahil sa maaring mangyari sa kanya. Everything is just coming back at me. The moment when he asked me to accompany him to the hardware store, the things he bought there, his scratch papers, and about last night when I felt the something sticky on his shirt. And that is blood! It's so weird. And now, the news about Dean's death broke out and everything is just messed up. For God's sake, there are two police officers at our freaking door! At mas lalong hindi ako makapaniwala na parang wala lang na nakatayo ang mabutihin kong pinsan.
"No! Trevor is not here!" Bigla na lang lumabas ito sa aking bibig. Kaya naman napatingin si Trevor at Nikos sa akin. Nikos looked me as is he's asking what game I am playing at right as of this moment. But what could I do? Turn Trevor in? No way. I couldn't believe myself. Ilang beses ko bang sinabi na wala na akong pakialam kay Trevor? Hindi na mabilang sa kamay ko, but look at me now, I am running in circles.
Agad akong lumapit kung saan nakatayo sa Trevor at lakas loob na humawak sa kamay niya. My heart started to race when our skin touched but I didn't think twice and hold his hand tightly as if I am afraid to let him go.
"Let's go." Sabi ko sa kanya at akmang hihilahin na siya at tumakas. My blood almost went to my face when nothing happened. We're just there standing in front of the police officers. Buong akala ko ay kaya ko siyang hilahin kung higpitan ko ang hawak ko sa kanya. Buong akala ko ay makakaalis kaming dalawa sa pwesto na iyon. Pero lahat nang iyon ay akala lang pala. Instead, he didn't even budged in his place. Bigla akong naestatwa sa aming pwesto. I am trying to pull his right arm and he's looking at me as if I've become crazy.
"What are you doing?" Para akong pinaliguan ng yelo sa lamig ng boses niya.
"Are you nuts, witch? At talagang sa harapan pa ng mga police?" Nikos said while giving me a weird look. The police officer was just standing there, looking confused. The other one faked a cough and then finally speak.
"We finally found your wallet, Sir." My mouth hung open when I heard the police officer say that words. I saw how my cousin Nikos grinned. Trevor looked relieved. And I definitely look so stupid right now.
"Thank you so much, officer." He said and extended his hands to offer a handshake. Hindi ako makapaniwala sa sarili ko, kaya bigla na lang akong natawa at tinanggal ang pagkahawak sa kamay ni Trevor. What the fuck? I think I'm really going crazy. And that is because of Trevor Dmitri who always has a way to shake my world.
"What was that? Really, Tori? Trevor is not here, let's go." Remind me not to kill Nikos. He's enjoying my misery. Sinimangutan ko siya at sinamaan ng tingin. Gosh, I really hate Nikos most of the time. Pagka-alis ng dalawang pulis sa aming bahay ay bigla na lang tumawa nang malakas ang aking pinsan at ngayon ay ginagaya niya ang sinabi ko kanina.
"No. Oh Trevor my love so sweet is not here~" Nikos said in a sing-song voice.
"One more word coming from you Nikos, you are so dead," I warned him. He laughed and walked towards the stairs.
"You are really funny, Victoria Abbel. Trevor lost his wallet last night and so we reported it to the police. Wow! They are so competent. Akalain mo 'yon, bumalik ang wallet niya sa kanya. Going here is not a waste of time at all. May eempake na ako ng mga gamit." With a grin, he continues going upstairs. Kaya naman, kami na lang ni Trevor ang natira dito sa baba. The silence is killing me. I can even feel Trevor's gaze piercing my skin.
"Okay, fine. I admit I must be out of my mind earlier." Lakas loob kong sabi sa kanya. I can't even look at him right now, I am so pathetic. Napatingin ako sa aking kamay, remembering the fleeting warmth of his hands to mine. I heard him scoff.
"Do you think I killed that guy? What is his name once again? Dean, right?" He let out a chuckle while standing a meters away from me. Hindi ako agad nakapag salita dahil sa sinabi niya.
"I saw the blood last night, Trevor." Humakbang ako palayo nang makita ko siyang lumalakad palapit sa akin.
"And your scratch papers, and the missing string of your guitar. I am just putting every piece together." I said, confused. I didn't even know where to look.
"Do you think I will kill for you, Tori?" Bigla akong nanlamig sa kanyang sinabi. Especially, when he called my name.
"Are you that special?" With a laugh, he crossed the distance between the two of us. Kahit paano ay may naramdaman akong sakit dahil sa sinabi niya pero iwinaksi ko na lang ito sa aking isipan.
Halos hindi ako makahinga dahil sa lapit niya sa akin. He's in front of me, I can even smell his masculine scent from my place. My heart started to throb.
"I don't know why I am explaining this to you but the boys and I were partying hard last night, and your cousin Nikos accidentally spilled his wine on me."
"How about the scratch papers? And the missing string of your guitar?" He raked his fingers through his head.
"God! Why am I explaining this?" He said under his breath.
"I am making a new album while I'm stuck in here and it is entitled THE CODE. I used Caesar's cipher and palindrome for the title of my songs." Naitakip ko na lang sa aking bibig ang dalawang kamay ko.
"Oh my goodness!" I exclaimed when I remembered what he wrote on his scratch papers. 3-L means 3 to the left. You will move the letters by three to the left so if the letters are VDYHPSOHDVH you will have the word SAVE ME, PLEASE. And the palindrome of REDRUM is MURDER so these are the possible title of his new song. Bakit ang tanga ako? Ngayon lang nag si-sink in ang lahat sa akin. I forgot that Trevor is a famous artist. He's a superstar. I am not kidding when I said he's really famous, he already made a name for himself. Hindi ako makatingin sa kanya nang diretso dahil nahihiya ako. Ramdam ko rin ang pagka pula ko ng aking pisngi ngayon. This is so embarrassing. I tried opening my mouth to say a word but close it again.
"Hindi ko akalain na makikita mo ang mga scratch papers ko. The reason why I threw them away is that they are just quick notes. The fuck, I really hate explaining things. And lastly, walang string ang gitara ko dahil hindi ko pa itinatakid and binili nating dalawa sa hardware. Happy?" With a deep sigh, he steps backward, giving me enough space to breathe.
"I'm sorry... I thought you were the reason why Dean is..." Hindi ko na naituloy ang sinabi ko dahil lahat nang sinabi niya sa akin ay katotohan. Why am I expecting him to kill for me? He's not that kind of person. All he cares about is himself and his music. But then, I envy Trevor. At least he has something to care about. Bigla na lang din akong napaisip sa aking sarili. What life did I try to make during my existence? I am not sad at all but I felt like tearing up.
I envy everyone who can approach him easily. Dahil pagdating sa akin, ang hirap-hirap niyang lapitan. Trevor is so close to me yet so far away. I wonder what baggage he's carrying that made him shut the world around him and focus only on his goal which is making music. But, do I need to have a goal? Pwede naman siguro mabuhay kahit wala kang patutunguhan. I let out a heavy sigh.
It's impossible to forget him that easily, lalo na kung makikita ko siya araw-araw. Hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko pa rin alam kung ano ba ang dahilan niya kung bakit siya nandito.
"What do you mean you are stuck here?" Naitanong ko na lang bigla. Tinapunan niya muna ako ng isang malamig na tingin bago magsalita muli.
"Nandito ako dahil sa'yo, Tori. You really have your way to torment me. I hate you so much." He said and started to walk away from me. Mukhang pupunta na siya sa kanyang kwarto.
He is here not for me but because of me. Those words pierced through my vulnerable heart. What did I ever do to him? All I know is I adored him to the point I forgot how to adore myself.
Hindi dumadaan ang araw na hindi ipinapakita at ipinaparamdam sakin ni Trevor na hindi niya ako gusto.
I suddenly felt stupid. But then, lagi na lang akong nagmumukhang tanga sa harapan niya. I want to find out why he's here, but I bet I'm just wasting my time.
Umakyat na rin ako papunta sa kwarto ko at tinanggal lahat ng scratch paper na kinuha ko mula sa basurahan. I crumpled each paper and throw it inside the bin. I don't want anything to do with it.
Kung kanina ay tumitibok nang mabilis ang puso ko dahil malapit siya sakin, ngayon naman ay dahil sa galit. I don't know why I am mad. Naghahalo-halo ang nararamdaman ko ngayon. Sinabunutan ko ang sarili ko dahil sa frustration at nahiga na lang sa kama ko habang tinatabunan ng unan ang aking mukha. I really hate the feeling that Trevor is looking at me with hate in his eyes whenever he got a chance but he's fucking me in my dreams. Shit. Bigla akong napatayo.
"I must be sexually frustrated." With a heavy heart, I tried to sleep my burden hoping that I won't see Trevor in my dreams again.
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