GRETA
At first, I thought it innocent.
When it comes time for my prayers, Brommy has started to come into my temporary home here.
This day is no different.
He never prays with me. There is little else to do in here but stare at plants or Rog. I quite like my new simple life. I did not think Brommy would be coming in here daily though.
I unfold my tunic, using it as my bedding. I try to ignore his presence but it is hard to now that he brings our child in here too.
"You should not look at me when I am without my tunic-"
"Why is that? You are a man in my eyes."
But he does not watch me like a man watches another man. I leave my lower half covered watching him as he sits down beside me with our child in arm.
"It does not matter what I am. You did not seem so enticed by my body before," I say in a waver.
"That's because I wasn't."
My heart trembles in a painful way as his response is curt as though I've annoyed him.
"I don't think Adler likes my body either," my ears burn as I say it, "I wonder often...I wonder what true pleasure feels like. I'm not, well, I suppose I wasn't very good at it, with him, I mean, I just think I wasn't good enough, or perhaps, there is something very wrong with my body. It won't let me be so happy during sex."
"What about with me? Wasn't that true pleasure?"
"You tricked me too, Brommy. How could it be pleasure when Adler forced you to do that with me-"
"Adler does not make me do anything," he says with a sly smile. The smile disappears and my heart goes cold as he watches me with the same cold gaze as his brother. "He does what I tell him. Adler does not plan very well. That is why I am needed. Enoch is a planner, but he is too fragile to apply force."
"Force?"
"Yes," Brommy answers. "Adler is very much a child as I'm sure you have gathered at this point. I am the one who looks out for him."
"Why would you do that for someone so evil to you?"
"Why would you make love to someone so evil? Someone who has beaten me several times without any remorse?"
I tremble as a fire of withheld emotion grows in his dark gaze.
"You have beaten others too with no remorse!"
"Don't be afraid of me," Brommy's tone softens, "I would never drop you."
His words cut deep. I drift backward, laying down at a loss of words, as I fall into memory. Adler is the true evil. He did drop me. He laughed at my pain. He hurt me.
He hurt me so badly.
"He doesn't love me-"
"It doesn't matter."
I go still as he settles behind me.
"He doesn't deserve to be loved by you. He didn't bother to save you. He let you suffer. He let you die."
***
ADLER
Golden hair lays spilled over my clout. The body of a woman is warm and keeps me safe.
What healthy, perfect skin. What a glimmer in her gaze. Longing for every second of my attention.
Peace, finally, I can have peace after a long night of lovemaking.
"Adler, you are wonderful."
"You are most beautiful, Ren. I love you."
I watch her body slink away from my bed. She slowly puts on her robes in a seductive manner.
"I love you most, Adler. You are the most beautiful man I have seen. I'm so sorry about your daughter. Hopefully, you have a happy day. We shall meet at dinner?"
"Yes."
My cloud darkens as the whore leaves my home and returns to the street.
In search of wine, I stride across the marble and find my seat on a fallen statue of Zard. Damn that whore for bringing up my pearl.
The next moment comes a crash. The glass bottle lays smashed on the ground. The wine staining the floor as I rise back up to my feet.
"Fuck you!" I shout thinking of my selfish pearl. How dare she leave me! How dare she! Leave me here alone with these useless bodies. "Did you enjoy watching us? You...you selfish whore. Fuck you!"
Another bottle leaves my grip. Wine, no, the liquid dripping from the column must be blood.
Smash!
Shattered glass spreads fractured light in all directions.
My heart continues to pound as it did all night. All night against that whore. The release. I craved it. Nothing like the best bodies, the all consuming passion.
"And I'll crave it again, I damn well want to! You hear me? I'm doing it...I'm doing it just to make you watch. She's so good, so much better than you could ever imagine! I'll do her again tonight just you watch! I love it! And she loves me!"
Smash, smash, smash!
A chuckle escapes me as I remember every moment of bubbling passion between me and Ren. What a delight to hold over my pearl.
"I hope you're happy! I hope you're happy you ugly little bald whore! Fuck you!"
Smash!
Ren is so much better. So much more beautiful and young. Happy.
I could never make her this happy.
"She loves me! And it's enough...you heard her scream that last night. She loved me so much...did you hear all of it? Did you hear her pleasure?" I ask, my voice growing quieter, "...I hope you did. You could never come close to comparing to Ren! Never."
Glass and other smashed objects, weapons, armor, and destroyed jewels lay in disarray around me.
My heart settles. The frantic feeling that just consumed me here and gone.
Like a lonesome incubator, my lip trembles as I fold my arms. An image sending the last of my sanity to leak down the columns.
A terrible image.
Why must it come now?
The body of a little baby staring up at me helpless on the ground. A small bleeding knee. Limbs reaching up at me frantically.
My heart feels frozen as it did then.
The crying, oh, how terrible it was to hear. I didn't want to hear it then. I wanted to be admired and loved. Not needed by a disturbed little girl. I had to ignore her.
I had a bunch of women waiting just for me.
I told myself my sweet could wait. She was very much alive there on the ground. I only wanted a couple minutes with my whores...but those minutes turned into drunken minutes.
Minutes to hours.
Hours to days.
All the rigor within me has vanished leaving me feeling cold and alone. What could make a soul wish to leave here?
Maybe I...maybe I should have told her.
"I loved you."
Tears, cursed tears, dampen my anger as I stare blankly ahead. My surroundings gone.
Scars...so many scars on her skin. How could I truly enjoy my time with her while seeing all that ugly skin? All her pain I ignored. Couldn't get much aroused if I hadn't.
And beneath that skin, the embodiment of something untouchable. Something I had no part in creating.
Her mind was lost.
"Are you happy now?" I wonder while staring into the streets below.
The mongrels, so useless. So ignorant and ungrateful for the light I've bestowed upon this hell hole out of the pure goodness of my heart.
"Are you happy now?" I ask again, my voice lowering as a guard approaches.
"Empirical advisor, Adler. Brometheous asked me to request your presence at Enoch's war advisoral meeting."
"Why has he not come to me himself? I was told my sons would address me with their own concerns."
"W-well-"
"'Well' what? What is it?"
"Brometheous has asked me not to disclose his whereabouts."
"Fine by me, be off. I will arrive when I wish."
When I am finally left alone, I return to my clout. None of the whores are going to come here with this new mess.
Spent, I fall back into the abyss where I can finally be free to be alone. The mess around me is no more. The people, the things. They become no more. Finally, I can have peace, but only after all turn away from me and leave me here.
"Leave me alone!"
How in the cosmos can I be controlled, tormented, by her?
I'm back again, in her private chamber, watching her sleep in noyk with dried tears staining her little face. The little black and blue marks and scars covering her front.
Her mouth twisted in pain even in sleep.
Why won't this damn wine make me forget? All it does is make me remember.
☁️