"Michael, please talk to me," Holly pleaded.
"I am talking to you."
They were coming from a meeting where they'd discussed everything taking place at the ranch and he'd been all business about it. She figured he had been mad at her for too long and was desperate to put an end to it because she could not take it anymore.
"As my business associate? I want my brother back. I want the guy who gives me bear hugs when I'm sad or teases me about the music I listen to or bullies me when I do something stupid. I want that guy."
His expression softened. "It's always been about you, Holly. Everything, it has to revolve around you. It didn't start when we found out the truth about you, no. It started when you were born, only back then it was cute and we all loved doting on you."
Holly watched him as he spoke.
"It's not just about Nick or your marriage to him, it's about everything else in between. You left us after Cassie and I asked you not to. She lost Lana, her best friend, but because you were hurting, no one turned to comfort her, no."
The truth in his words tore her apart and made her feel completely selfish.
"Did you ever ask her how she was doing?" he asked. "Would you like to know what I went through?" He went and sat on the desk of the study and faced her. "My friends started talking smack about you and because I was your big brother, it was my responsibility to protect you. I was an adult and I was getting into fights and for what, so that you could run away? Neither Cassie nor I wanted you to leave. We may not have voiced our reasons back then, but you should have known."
He released a soft laugh as he gestured with his hands.
"You went to New York, you got married and never cared to tell any of us. You left us all here to deal with the mess you'd left behind and moved on as though we were no longer part of your life."
It pained her to hear him say those things.
"You came back and like the prodigal son, we all welcomed you with open arms. How long will you stay this time before you leave again? What will you do now to mess it all up again so that you can run away and leave us to fix it for you?"
He got up at that point, took his things and walked out.
Holly felt tears burning her eyelids and replayed everything he'd just said, word for word until it hurt too much to think about it. She'd known she'd hurt her family, but she'd never imagined they'd been so negatively affected by what had happened.
She wondered if Cassie was just as hurt and was waiting for the right moment to let it all out.
"Holly?"
At Nick's voice, she straightened up and pushed away the tears.
"I need to talk to you," he said.
"Not now, Nick." She didn't want to hear anymore about how much she'd hurt all those around her.
"Please, Holly."
She took a deep breath and motioned him to speak his piece.
"I've always loved you." He started and the tears she'd forced away started finding their way through her tear ducts.
"I came here with the intention of winning you back, but I realize now that won't happen. I've been thinking, and I realize now that I've never said that I'm sorry."
The tears had nothing stopping them now.
"I'm sorry we lost Ryan and I'm sorry for the pain his loss caused you."
She walked over to him and he took her in his arms, expressing the shared pain they were both in.
"I'm sorry too, and I've never blamed you, not once," she said.
"If you want a divorce, I'll sign the papers." He pulled away and abruptly walked out as though he could not bear being in the same room with her any longer.
She knew him well enough to know he did not want to break down in front of her so she understood why he immediately walked out the way he did. He had just lost his child and now, he was losing his wife.
She sympathized with him and even though her pain was still as pure, she felt like the burden was less after she'd shared it with Mermaid.
She stayed in the study until she regained her composure and then walked out and went straight to her cottage. She'd just gotten ready for bed when she heard a soft knock on the door. When she opened to find Mermaid, her heart filled with warmth and joy and she forgot everything that had happened that day.
"Come in," she said.
The moment Holly locked the door, Mermaid jumped into her arms and their lips captured in a kiss. She found peace and contentment in Mermaid's arms and wondered if God had sent her an angel just when she'd been in desperate need of one.
Her skin was soft, smooth, sweet and her kisses were so passionate and intense, they drove away all the bad things going on in her world. It was just amazing how easily Mermaid could make her feel better without even having to say a word.
"I want to sleep in your bed tonight," she said when she momentarily broke the kiss. "I want to lie in your arms and see you first thing in the morning when I open my eyes. I want to be yours in a manner that no one else has ever been." She spoke while unbuttoning Holly's pajamas as they headed to the bedroom.
Holly was terrified of having history repeat itself, but there was something about Mermaid, an innocence and sweetness to her that weakened Holly and she just couldn't bring herself to turn her away.
"I don't want you to keep me a secret like you did Lana or Nick."
Holly was about to pull away at the words when Mermaid kissed her, weakening her further. The words drove fear through her, but Mermaid barely gave her a chance to acknowledge it.
"I don't know who I was, Holly. But as Mermaid, I belong to no one else but you."
She finished unbuttoning the shirt and eased it down her shoulders.
"I know you've been through a lot. I know you still have a lot to overcome. If I am a hindrance to you in anyway, I want you to tell me and I promise I will back off."
Holly shut her up with a kiss as she ran her fingers through her long hair. "Do you have any idea what you do to me?" she asked. "You're the only thing in my life right now that makes sense. When everything is going wrong in my world, when I am down on my knees, worn out, tired, hopeless, your kisses makes it all better. Your kisses have the power to take every bad thing away."
When they fully undressed each other, they climbed into bed, a little more aware of their feelings for each other.
The echoes of their love making synchronized with the sound of night creatures as the heavenly bodies illuminated beams of thick rays into the room, watching the two young lovers.
The beautiful night of shared magic merged their hearts, as it did their souls and Holly knew that Mermaid was right. She could not keep her a secret from her family. Not when Mermaid made her so happy.
This time she was willing to sacrifice it all and stick around to watch everything unfold because this time, she was exactly where she needed to be.
*
Morning light found Mermaid entwined in Holly's arms. She woke up feeling so good, she never wanted to leave the haven Holly provided her.
"Good morning," Holly said lazily and kissed her, arousing her awake with the unexpected fire of her kiss.
"It is a beautiful morning, isn't it?" Mermaid said as she got on top of Holly, perfectly positioning herself.
Holly nodded.
The comfort drawn from the warmth of their adjoined bodies was quickly replaced by arousal when Holly sat up to kiss her and then slowly ran her hands over Mermaid's body. She lowered them further down and slowly started teasing her femininity.
Mermaid groaned at first contact as a rush of heat and arousal quickly traveled through her body. Holly continued to tease her and turned her over so that she had better access, which Mermaid gladly offered.
When she stopped, Mermaid opened her eyes and met Holly's playful gaze. She was ready to beg for more, but Holly didn't give her the chance as she withdrew her fingers and moved to her lower abdomen, planting a gentle kiss on her womanhood.
She moaned in pleasure as Holly resumed making love to her and when she couldn't take it anymore, she pulled back, and Holly raised her head in confusion.
Mermaid turned her around, placed a kiss on her lips and then quickly trailed a row of kisses down her body, stopping at the apex of Holly's pleasure. She smiled at Holly and planted a deep searing kiss on her, which made Holly tremble underneath her.
She softly ran her hands over Holly's body while she explored her with her mouth and tried hard to ignore what Holly's sighs and moans of pleasure were doing to her. It wasn't long before every strand of hair on her skin rose and her insides melted at the gushing pleasure of their mutual climax.
Giving pleasure, she'd come to learn, was just as powerful as receiving it. She collapsed beside Holly as her muscles continued to ride on the lingering waves of her orgasm.
"I could stay like this forever," she said when her muscles relaxed.
"I know, me too."
She turned to face Holly as she leaned on her elbow. "Last night, when I came over," she said, thinking about how sad Holly had appeared. "You looked distraught. Did something happen?"
"Sometimes I forget how clearly you can read me," Holly said. She sat up and leaned back against the bed. "I had a meeting with Michael, and afterwards when we were talking, he expressed the hurt I had caused him and Cassie when I left six years ago. It was tough but I got to know why he's so angry with me. After that, Nick came to see me and we managed to talk about Ryan. It was hard for both of us, but necessary because I think the healing process has now begun."
"Yes, it has. Things will only get better from this point forward."
"He said he'd grant me the divorce," Holly said.
Mermaid felt bad because she'd inwardly wished for that, but since it was what Holly wanted, she figured she didn't need to stress over it.
When they went to the Mackenzie manor for breakfast, they found Michael having breakfast by himself and joined him. He was still apprehensive towards Holly but less hostile.
Holly happened to mention Mermaid's incident two days earlier as a conversational piece and his reaction was as expected.
"You passed out?" he asked.
"Yes, but I'm fine," Mermaid said. She was pleased he treated her with the same love and warmth he did Holly.
"Did you get hurt? And how come nobody told me?"
Mermaid reached for his hand over the table in reassurance. "I didn't get hurt and no one told you because it wasn't worth mentioning."
He watched her for a moment. "Are you okay?"
She smiled and turned to Holly. "I'm great. Holly took wonderful care of me."
Holly met her with a smile because she noted the subtext in her statement.
"Okay, good. Well, I have to go to the office. You shouldn't be alone." He got up and absently pecked her forehead, then Holly's.
Feeling like she should do something about their situation, Mermaid got up and went after him. "Michael?"
He stopped and turned to face her.
"Can we talk for a sec?"
He nodded.
"Holly told me about what happened."
A look of embarrassment came over his face. "I'm ashamed of myself for what I said to her. I made her feel like she owed me for being her brother. I feel like an ass."
The fact that he acknowledged what he had said as unfair surprised Mermaid.
"She understands where you were coming from, so you were entitled to say what you felt. But she needs you, Michael. You're her best friend."
Michael, seeming at a loss for words, stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her. A second later, he let go and walked off, leaving Mermaid with questions rather than answers.
"Mermaid?"
She turned at Mark's voice. When she looked at him, an expression of guilt came over his face.
"I want to apologize for my behavior the other day."
Mermaid stopped him. "Mark, you don't have to apologize for anything. What happened was a mistake. Hopefully one you're unlikely to repeat."
He nodded in relief. "So we're still friends, you don't hate me?"
She laughed softly. "I could never hate you and yes, we're still friends."
She gave him a light hug and then went back to the house. She almost bumped into Nick again and quickly apologized.
"I'm sorry, are you okay?" he asked.
She noticed the strained look across his face and asked, "Is something wrong?"
"I'm leaving. I just came to say goodbye."
Mermaid touched his shoulder in form of comfort. She imagined he was suffering from a broken heart and felt sorry for him. He quickly leaned forward, pecked her cheek and walked away.
"Are you okay?" she asked Holly when she got back to the table, knowing Nick had talked to her before leaving.
"I keep hurting people."
"You don't do it intentionally."
"That doesn't make a difference."
"It does, Holly. If you were hurting them deliberately, then we would be having a very different conversation."
"I don't want to hurt you," she said.
Mermaid hesitated, knowing very well it was a possibility but she failed to rely on it because she could also end up hurting her considering there was no telling what was hidden in her memories and how it would come to affect their lives. "You won't hurt me and if it happens that you do, we'll find a way to work through it together."
She wrapped her arms around Holly then pulled back. "Now come on, turn that frown upside down."
Holly smiled and Mermaid rewarded her with a kiss. "I love how beautiful you are," she said.
Holly raised her eyebrow at the compliment.
"When I woke up that first day and saw you at my bedside at the hospital with no past recollections, I thought you were an angel."
Holly blushed and Mermaid did not want to embarrass her further but needed to say one last thing. "And last night and this morning, I want to spend everyday and every night like that with you."
Holly pulled her close and kissed her. Mermaid tilted her head and placed her hand over the nape of Holly's neck, opening her lips at Holly's request. Holly was so passionate, Mermaid was afraid her own desire would consume her.
"You're going to make me lose my mind," she said against Holly's lips, afraid her body would betray her right there in the dining room.
"You've already made me lose mine so I don't see any harm in equalizing the situation," Holly said as she placed feather light kisses along Mermaid's neck which was completely arousing.
"Okay, you have to stop," Mermaid said, almost pleadingly.
Holly ran the tip of her tongue over the outline of her ear and then closed her mouth over the earlobe as she fanned her with her warm breath.
The act drove such madness through Mermaid that if Holly did really mean to drive her insane, she was fully succeeding.
She was a bit relieved when Holly stopped, but was completely taken off guard when she got up and pulled her closer, pushing the breakfast aside as she lifted Mermaid off the floor and placed her over the table, capturing her lips in a kiss before she could protest.
Holly started running her hands over Mermaid's body and positioned herself between her parted legs. Mermaid's arms were clasped around her neck, holding her intimately close as she responded to the demanding kiss.
Holly went further and started unbuttoning her shirt and an alarm went off in her head. What if someone walked in on them? How would they explain themselves? There were countless rooms in that house, why the dining room table?
"Holly," she moaned, desperately engulfed by sensations of arousal.
"What?" Holly said, breaking the kiss as she went to place soft kisses over Mermaid's cleavage while her hands worked on the rest of the buttons.
"Anyone could walk in on us," she said, but it seemed like Holly was past caring.
"I thought you wanted everyone to find out."
Her mind wasn't working as it should have been because of what Holly was doing to her. "I did, I mean, I do." She moaned when Holly pushed her bra aside and covered an aroused nipple with her mouth.
"Then what's the matter?" Holly asked, pulling the shirt apart when she succeeded in undoing the buttons and then her hands went to the belt of her jeans.
"Not like this."
Holly kissed a trail down her flat stomach and momentarily rested on her navel, teasing it with the tip of her tongue.
"I don't want them to find out like this." She was unsure of how she managed to speak because all her senses were having great difficulty responding to anything else other than Holly and what she was doing.
"Stop me," Holly said and Mermaid thought she was kidding.
Her hands had already unbuckled her belt and were unzipping her pants now while her exquisite mouth left every part of her being with burning sensations of need.
"I can't," she whispered.
Holly met her aroused gaze and slowly trailed her hand underneath Mermaid's jeans. When she touched the moist spot, the electrifying sensations in Mermaid grew in intensity and traveled through her entire body in a mad frenzy.
She arched back her head and realized the only thing she could do now was enjoy the experience, come what may because it was too late to stop it now.
Holly ran her lips over her neck, trailing her tongue over the sensitive flesh as she applied slow gentle thrusts and Mermaid buried her face in Holly's shoulder, trying hard not to moan, but at some point, she couldn't help herself.
She didn't know how, but when she reached climax, tears fell from her eyes and Holly wrapped her arms around her to keep her still.
Her body trembled at the climaxing effect and she felt like her brain was temporarily out of service because it could not send the right signals to the rest of her being.
After a moment, Holly started zipping up her pants and shortly after, she buttoned up her shirt. She kissed the tears on Mermaid's face and ran her fingers through her hair in a combing motion.
When she was done helping Mermaid compose herself, she pulled up a chair and Mermaid's wobbly legs could barely hold her weight as she sat down.
"Are you okay?" Holly asked.
"No," Mermaid said, crossing her legs because she could still feel Holly inside her.
They sat silently for a while until the rhythm of her heart slowed back to normal. When Holly reached for her hand over the table, Mermaid laid a light kiss over it and leaned back on her seat, afraid that any more contact would lead them to another round of love making.