⚠️SA Warning ⚠️
Sam
I was going to do it, I was, but as soon as I saw Ben in my dorm room, the thought of breaking up with him left me sick to my stomach with guilt.
"Hey baby," he greeted me when I opened the door. I gave him a smile, hoping he couldn't see my discomfort as he leaned in and kissed me. The kiss didn't feel the same as it usual did. Usually, kissing him made me feel at ease. Now I just felt... nothing.
We pulled back. "So, what did you want to talk to me about?" He asked me, walking into my dorm and sitting on my bed. I closed the door and walked over to sit next to him.
Okay, Sam, you can do this. Just tell him it's not working out. No, tell him you guys are moving too fast. Tell him 'it's not you, it's me'. "Um, well..." I took a deep breath and looked Ben in the eyes. His innocent eyes that I was about to make sad. "There's a party tonight that Kai and I are going to. I wanted you to come."
You stupid, dumb, idiotic frickhead.
"Eh, a party?" He questioned like going to parties was below him.
"Yes, please, you never go with me." Maybe I just needed to remind myself that Ben actually can be fun and remember the reason I started dating him in the first place. A night out could help.
At least, that's what I told myself.
"I really don't want to go, and you shouldn't either."
"Why? It's Saturday night. Plus, I already promised Kai I'd go with him, but it'd be much more fun with you there."
He looked like he'd rather do anything else, but he gave in, "Fine, I guess. But we're not staying late."
"We won't," I promised, leaning in to kiss him, but things took a turn for us at the party and I saw Ben as clear as day for the first time.
Ben and I drove to the party while Kai met us there since he was coming from his girlfriend's house. Kai got there first and was already taking photos of people partying. I smiled, he was really going to be the best photographer one day.
Then his camera turned on Ben and I before putting his camera down to hang around his neck, "You guys made it!"
"Didn't think we would?" I questioned lightheartedly.
Kai looked at Ben then back at me and shrugged, "Didn't know if you'd change your mind. But I'm glad you didn't," he had a broad smile, "I captured Dylan cheating on Quinn. I can't wait to show her."
I didn't know who those people were, but I couldn't help but laugh, "I think you find too much joy in catching people cheat."
"It's a full time job," Kai deadpanned.
"Pfft okay, well we're gonna go find something to drink," I said, grabbing Ben's hand and dragging us towards the kitchen. I grabbed a red solo cup and Ben took it from me, "Hey."
"You're not drinking tonight. Please, we're not gonna be here for long anyway."
"Ben," I tugged on his button up shirt, getting him to step closer to me, "Loosen up. We're at a party, I know you don't care for them, but try to have a good time, okay?" I asked.
"Fine, but no drinking."
I sighed, "Okay, I won't drink. Now can we go dance?" I asked desperate to have some fun. I was in need of some fun; to just relax and enjoy myself. No worries and definitely not thinking about Noah. "Maybe later we can sneak off to a bedroom and-"
Ben grimaced, "We're not having sex on some random bed."
Ugh. "Let's dance," I said and was going to step away, but Ben stopped me.
"I'm sorry, these thing just make me uncomfortable," he apologized with his hands on my waist.
"I know, it's okay. I'm just happy you came with me," I told him, but I wasn't too sure if that was an honest statement.
"But tonight when we go back to my dorm, we can do... whatever you want," he said suggestively. I grinned and pressed my lips to his.
The music wasn't the best to dance to, but at least Ben stayed with me and didn't complain anymore. And finally my body let go of the tension and I could actually have a good time. A thoughtless time where I didn't feel anxious over every little thing.
But then my fun got ruined. Ben and I were in the crowd of other people drinking and dancing when a bulky looking guy waltzed up to a girl, he was clearly making her uncomfortable with what looked like his flirting and then he slid his hand down and grabbed her ass before she pushed him away and stormed off.
I cringed and faced Ben again, I knew he saw the same thing I did. "Men can be so gross sometimes," I said in disgust.
Ben looked at me like he didn't understand what I said. "Maybe if she wasn't wearing clothes that made her look like a prostitute, guys wouldn't hit on her."
My jaw was to the floor, "you're joking." Except I knew he wasn't because Ben didn't know how to joke.
"Girls like that are just asking to be hit on," Ben said like it was a fact. "Looking like that and then getting mad when they get catcalled or a guy touching them. It's hypocritical."
I was aghast at Ben. My hands dropped from his sides, "No, it's that men sexualize women's bodies. They should be able to wear whatever they want and not have to deal with men ogling at them." I scoffed, "I can't believe you think this way."
"Whatever, I didn't even want to be here. Let's leave."
What the hell? "No, you can leave. I'm staying," I told him, crossing my arms over my chest. "I'll leave with Kai."
"You're just upset. Let's go back to my place, I don't want to argue at some obtuse party over something stupid."
I gapped, "You're being sexist, Ben. I'm not leaving," I stood my ground.
"And you're being immature." he claimed.
I shrugged, "then I'm immature."
"Fine, go home with Kai. We'll talk tomorrow about this."
I shook my head and scoffed as I watched him walk away. "Unbelievable," I muttered. I was furious, both at what Ben was saying about women and at myself for actually feeling guilty for wanting to break up with him. I should've done it there at the party. Gotten it over with.
I felt so stupid choosing Ben. Just being with him in general. How did I not realize how sexist he was until now? Kai even warned me. So, so stupid, Sam.
I was gonna go to the bathroom and splash water in my face to cool down, but of course the line was long, so I made my way upstairs and searched for a bathroom. The first door was locked and the second door I watched a very horny looking couple go into the room. And the third door I opened was an empty bedroom with a bathroom attached to it.
I stepped into the bedroom and was going to shut the door when a hand stopped it from shutting. I glared at him. "Hey Sammy," Jude greeted me, but it felt far from any greeting I've ever heard. "I thought that was you." He noted.
"Leave me alone," I told him in nonchalance to convey I didn't care what he had to say. As soon as I tried to side step around him and leave to room, he nudged me back. "I'll scream, don't think I won't," I warned him.
Jude laughed, "Chill, I'm not going to do anything. I just wanted to catch up."
"Well, I don't want to, so if you could move out of my way," I said bitterly.
He didn't seem to like that answer as he gripped my arm, "I don't understand what Noah saw in you. Or why you think you are so much better than me."
"Maybe because I'm not a psychopath. Let me go. You have three seconds before I scream."
"The great thing about parties, no one will hear you, they're all to drunk, the music's too loud."
"You're a sick person, you know that? Like mentally there's something screwed up in your head," I spoke matter-of-factly and I definitely should not have talked back to Jude. I should've just pleaded for me to leave because then I made him enraged and I was being shoved, pushed down onto the queen sized bed in the room.
I never felt fear take over me faster than that moment.
Jude's body kept me in place, one hand keeping both of my hands against my chest while his other hand had my jaw in a deadly grip. "I'm the fucked up one?"
"Get off me!" I tried shoving him, but he had all the advantage; taller, stronger, and faster than me.
"Scream, I don't care. In fact, it would turn me on," he said with a sadistic grin.
I felt like I was going to throw up and I wish I had. But I tried a new tactic, "Okay, I'm sorry. You're right. I don't know what Noah saw in me. Clearly nothing because he broke up with me-"
"It's too late because he humiliated me. And I don't like not getting what I want. And what I want right now is to say 'fuck you' to Noah in a way that'll absolutely destroy him." My heart was pounding in fear because I knew exactly what Jude was implying.
Tears welled in my eyes, "Noah hates me, you messing with me won't bother him," I tried.
Jude shook his head, "We both know that's a fucking lie," he said, "So stop fucking talking," and he leaned down.
"Stop" I cried, but his finger's grip on my jaw was too strong for me to turn my face when he leaned in to kiss me, "Stop," I sobbed, but my word morphed to a blur when his lips touched mine.
I tried squirming away, trashing my body out of his hold, but I was too weak.
I turned my face away from him when his fingers left my jaw but then they went to the zipper of my pants and I squeezed my eyes shut, praying I didn't have to see, hear, or feel what Jude was going to do to me. "Please stop!" I cried.
And my prayer must've been heard because I felt his weight lift. But it wasn't God's doing, when I opened my eyes, Noah was on top of Jude, throwing punch after punch to his face.
And he wasn't stopping.
**
Next chapter out soon. Thank you for reading <3
-Xoxo, Bert