The flutter of wings and the quiet sound of the fountain filled the silence of the private greenhouse garden. A table for two was set out with a tea set and various desserts and finger foods set up on the table.
Sera sat across President Snow and stared at the lukewarm rose tea that she was served. A white rose petal floated on the surface of the tea.
"Regarding the recent happenings of District 5—you wouldn't happen to know anything, would you, Miss Reza?" President asked after a moment of silence.
She let out a sigh and shook her head. "I wasn't in 5 when it happened." Her answer was calm and straight to the point but inside her weak heart strained to hold itself together. She only prayed that the flow of the water from the water fountain was loud enough to mask her nervous heartbeat.
"I'm aware." He took a sip of his tea and coldly placed the cup down. "But surely, you would've heard something."
"All I know is what's known by everyone else."
President Snow stared at her, unmoving. He was slightly disappointed in her and believed she might know more or perhaps she did know more and was keeping things. He tried to probe her for more information but the girl kept repeating her answers.
Displeased, President Snow had no choice but to relent and let the matter go. "Well, I suppose there's no helping it." He picked up the fine hand painted white teacup and took another sip of his drink. "I do have to congratulate you...on your recent successes."
Sera placed her teacup down carefully. "My recent successes?" She echoed.
"Ah yes. Your work at the clinic was remarkable. You have been a great help."
"I have?"
She felt terrible. Her hands were clammy and her head felt heavy. The air around her felt hot and heavy, she found it harder to breath but she tried to keep her composure. She had to keep her composure.
"You have. You've made your way through the designated patients and families quite well. Thanks to you, Panem is safer."
Was Panem really safe because of her?
She didn't think so.
She broke up families, killed children and adults alike. She didn't think Panem was safe.
In the days since she had won her games and was assigned this task, she'd kept count of how many lives she had taken since. With each meeting with the President, the number only grew and now she had taken more lives or allowed more deaths than in her arena.
She forced herself to smile meekly and nod. She couldn't find any words to reply to him or talk to him in general.
"I do have a question." He finished his tea and looked at her. "I heard a little thing about you...I'm sure you're aware of the rumors that surround one Finnick Odair."
Her face scrunched up in confusion as she tilted her head to the side, discarding her half-drank tea on the table. "What does Finnick Odair have to do with me?" She questioned.
"That's what I would like to know—what does he have to do with you?"
"Nothing. I hardly know him."
"Do you? I've heard that the two of you were seen together at the Presidential Palace a few days before your return after your win—"
"It was the first time I met him and it was an accident."
"Accident?"
"Yes. An accident. I was waiting for my appointment and he and I bumped into each other."
"You were also seen with him in District 4."
"I was on tour and he was just one of the guides." It was hardly fair that he was picking that moment, she didn't ask to be in 4. "I spoke to other victors too like...um...Peridot Fowle from 1, Hermes from 8 and even Haymitch Abernathy from 12...to name a few examples. It really was a coincidence."
"And then you were seen with him at the celebration dinner at the Presidential Palace where the two of you disappeared alone."
The victory ball. She'd almost forgotten all about it. The Presidential Palace to her was a maze. At first she was lucky to have Emilia and Huxley by her side with Scarus keeping a watch from the shadows then as the night went on, she eventually lost them, even Scarus. Losing sight of Scarus was a relief to her but that relief turned to dread when she realized Huxley was gone as well.
Stumbling around blindly through the entire Palace, she unconsciously dodged the guards. It was easy for her, she was small and quick on her feet. Nevertheless, it was something foolish and instead of hiding and running she could've asked them for directions. Old habits. She wished now sitting in the President's rose garden that she did ask them, at least then she wouldn't have witnessed what she did.
She still remembered what she almost saw. Leora's flushed face and hazy eyes as she dragged away like a ragdoll by strangers in heavily decorated satin masks with jewels and feathers. They were Capitolites no doubt, probably the ones from the so-called Capital Families. She'd only learn about them from Emilia who was drunkenly rambling on about them. The prestigious and wealthy families were part of the upper class in the Capitol which surprised Sera. She didn't think a place like Capitol would have a hierarchy. No, she didn't.
Still that wasn't what stayed on her mind. It was Leora who was on her mind. Away from the faux laughter, chatter and music, she swayed side to side as those colorful strangers handled her like a doll. She tried to free herself but they held on, whispering things Sera didn't hear. Leora wasn't the only there. Another woman was there. She looked familiar to Sera but she couldn't quite guess who it was. All she remembered of the other woman was her long golden blonde hair. The jeweled pins failed to hold them up and her curls cascaded down over her back.
Before Sera could witness more, her eyes were covered and she was gently dragged her. The fear she felt in that moment was akin to what she felt in the arena. When she got her vision back, she let out breath of relief as she met the familiar face of Finnick who looked anything but relieved. His eyes were wild and red. His face flushed like Leora's and his breathing was heavy. He looked anxiously around the hall that he had dragged Sera to while ducking down.
His strangeness only lasted for a moment. He was fine soon after, acting as if he did nothing out of the ordinary. He even flashed his signature smile but it didn't reach his eyes. Sera wanted to ask him questions but she didn't. A part of her was afraid of the answers she'd get and Huxley had drilled in her head that the less she knew, the better it would for her and that ignorance was truly bliss and that's why a lot Capitolites were so happy all the time.
Quickly she had changed the subject and tried to leave, only for him to stop her. The two actually managed to have normal conversation without her running away. He had caught on that she was avoiding him and she wasn't the only one, Huxley was as well. It was natural for the two. She and Huxley didn't want attention, Finnick was the walking and living definition of attention even if he didn't ask to be born with it, his appearance was too bright.
"I was lost and he helped me find my way." Sera finally answered after a moment of recall. "In the crowd, I let go Emilia's hands and lost track of Huxley, I ended up at some corridors I didn't recognize and he was walking there, walking back to the main hall. I asked him to help me. It was nothing more. I didn't see him after that." She lied. She did see him before she left, standing in a balcony, drinking in the cool air as he fanned himself.
He narrowed his gaze on her as he traced the rim of his pearl china teacup. "What about the clinic? I was informed that the two of you met at the clinic."
The clinic. She didn't expect him to ask about the clinic. It was no doubt something that Scarus brought up. "Another coincidence. I didn't know he was there and I just happened to run into him." It was easier to answer him when she wasn't trying to scramble her mind trying to find excuses or come out with lies that even she would be convinced by.
Ironically the one time she decided to be honest, President Snow didn't believe her at all. "How peculiar. These coincidences seem to be one too many." His eyes stayed on her, examining her carefully. She tried to stay calm and not shake under his gaze, not even relaxing when he looked away. "Make sure there isn't a next time, his association with you hurts your reputation and his—we can't have that."
"We hardly know each other." She lied.
"Keep it that way." He snipped off a rose, she watched as the discolored rose fell to the floor with a quiet thud. "Officer Redcliff will inform you of your new assignments."
She nodded, not taking her eyes off the fallen rose. She felt like that white and red rose, someone who didn't belong in the garden and could easily be discarded just like that.
"I'd also like to wish you well on your sister's recent wedding to a fellow victor, Huxley, wasn't." Her mouth went dry as she weakly nodded. "I hope Redcliff's presence at the wedding wasn't too much of a burden."
It was. Scarus' presence was not welcome and everyone at the wedding had to walk on eggshells with him around. Sera's childhood friends were especially anxious around him given what had recently happened in 5 at Nero. It didn't particularly help when one of her friends was actually involved in the incident.
By the end of the wedding, almost everyone scrambled to get home. The reception was almost canceled and her aunt now suspected that Sera was hiding something from the rest of the family. She was hiding something, just not from the rest of the family but from everyone.
Putting her unwanted guard at the wedding nearly ruined her family's day and it only made Sera feel horrible. Even though the wedding had long since passed, she still remembered how it went but she could hardly tell the President what was really on her mind.
Ah yes, Mr President, your addition of Scarus was most wonderfully horrible to me and my family and we had the worst day of our lives. Not to mention, he made a child cry.
Sera kept those thoughts to herself. She would never say those words out loud.
Numbly she forced herself to smile. "Not at all. I understand that it was for my safety and I'm very much thankful...for your generosity and kindness and for thinking about me."
The corners of his lips turned upwards and he nodded, pleased with her response. She felt sick to her stomach.
"Is that all?" She asked when the President said nothing for a while.
He ignored her and carried on tending to his roses. She stared at the lifeless white petal floating on top of her now-cold tea. She lied to the President, did he know she lied? She couldn't tell.
"Leora Shelley," President Snow stopped and turned to her. "She's ill, I need you to replace her as a mentor in the games."
She agreed silently. It wasn't like she had room to argue. She already lied to the President about Finnick.
The truth was somehow the two had decided on a comfortable acquaintanceship, not quite friends, not quite strangers, just two people who could talk to each other with no expectations.
She wasn't sure if she could give him her complete trust even if the two had a secret between them.
President Snow dismissed Sera and she was escorted out to the waiting area where Scarus waited for her. He wore his typical uniform with his long black leather coat. He stuck out like a sore thumb against the white marble columns and the colorful painted murals on the walls.
When he noticed her, he smiled and held out a hand for her.
Strangely, he had become softer as the days passed. She hated it.
She ignored his hand and stumbled past him. She felt as if she was going to faint and her chest ached badly.
"Woah. You almost fell face flat. I know you're not used to those shoes but can you please not embarrass yourself in front—are you okay?" Scarus asked, grabbing her by her arms and escorting out of the building.
"I'm fine." She focused on her steps and tried her best to keep her pain at bay.
He didn't say anything but kept his eyes on her. Suddenly, a pang of guilt attacked his consciousness but he quickly brushed it off. He wasn't in the wrong at all. Sera was clumsy and a nuisance to him.
A few Peacekeepers and Elite Guards alike greeted him. He half-heartedly greeted them, his attention on Sera. If she wasn't there, he would still be with the Elite Guards. He would be happier, no one would bother him much but he hesitated.
Sera stumbled on her dress, Scarus caught her with ease and helped her to stand straight. He didn't let go of her waist and helped her into the car.
He took a seat next to her and signaled to the driver to take them to the Victoria Building, the apartment building which housed most of the victors who had to stay in the Capitol. It was mostly empty except for a few tenants, Sera was one of them.
"You have a few appointments next week at the clinic." Scarus read out a list of dates and times as Sera nodded along, her head against the window. Her eyes were heavy. "Seraphine?"
She nodded. "I'm listening." She sat up straight but Scarus moved to stop her, she gently moved his hands away and shifted in her seat to move closer to the window and away from him.
Without a word, he pressed a button to put the partition up between the driver and the two of them. Sera's eyes shifted to him and back outside. "Doesn't look like it. You've been acting off since the meeting. Are you sick?"
She bit her lips and glanced at him. Her eyes were red and under the thick layer of makeup, he could make out the dark circles underneath her eyes like she hadn't slept in days. "I'm fine." She repeated. "And you might want to add a few more things to the schedule."
"Like what?"
"I'm replacing Leora Shelley soon as a mentor for the next games."
He took it in and wrote what she said down before looking at her for more but she said nothing. She glanced at the schedule in his hands and closed her eyes, throwing her head back.
"Leora Shelley?" She didn't respond. "It's rare for a mentor to be suddenly switched out."
"Is it?"
Throwing a glance at her, he nodded. "Yes. Though the tributes are fortunate this was done early on and not late into the games."
Fortunate.
Sera felt bitter hearing that word. Fortunate. There was nothing fortunate about this. Leora might've been a wreck but at least she had experience with mentoring, on the other hand, Sera knew nothing and she didn't know what to expect.
"Seraphine?"
"Julian Wells is still the other mentor, right?"
"Yes."
She'd have to rely on Wells to show her the ropes. Wells was more decent of a mentor than Leora, when he wasn't off his mind drunk.
"A mentor." A raspy voice said.
Her vision fogged up and darkened as her head spun around. She blinked a few times to clear her vision and when she opened her eyes, she saw him.
He was sitting next to Scarus. Gen—Eugene. His head was bent at an odd angle with bones sticking out. Eyes hollow and bleeding from his mouth.
"A mentor." He croaked. "How nice. Another one dead...by your hands."
She balled up her fists and looked away, staring out the window.
"Look away..." Eugene laughed weakly. His image appeared on the window and she jumped back.
"Look away...ignore us." His voice distorted to a girlish voice then to a deeper voice as his image flickered from a sickly girl with wispy rose-gold hair and a boy with golden eyes. "Ignore them...be a good mentor."
Taking a deep pained breath, she shut her eyes and counted backwards. When she opened them, the sun had set and they were at the apartment building.
"Seraphine," Scarus stopped her outside of her apartment. The halls were quiet and no one but the two were there. "Is everything okay?" Those words felt foreign coming from him and she knew he didn't mean them but he did.
She looked up at him with a tired smile. Funny how he didn't care about her when they first met but within months he couldn't let her go out of his sight. She didn't like it. Her moves and words were all being recorded by him and parroted back to President Snow.
"Like I said, I'm fine." She repeated her answer and started to put her passcode in, covering it with her hands to stop him from knowing it. He'd find out anyway and everytime he did, she changed it.
"You don't look fine. Did you take all your medications?" She nodded and carried on her task. "Then why—"
"I'm just a little...tired." The door unlocked with a quiet click.
"Are you upset that I was at your sister and Huxley Foret's wedding? Did my presence ruin everything for you?"
Like I ruined everything for everyone.
He didn't say that, he couldn't, not to Sera.
She let out a weak laugh and shook her head. She wasn't in the place to be upset. "No. The President was generous enough to send you there on my behalf and safety. If anything I should be the one asking you, if you were okay attending the wedding."
Taken aback by her words, he tried to think of something to say.
She was erratic at times.
Sometimes, she acted like she wasn't there.
Sometimes, it was like she hated everything and everyone.
Sometimes, she looked like she was going to cry.
And sometimes, she looked like she was going to drop dead any moment.
He stared at her. Her face was pale, her eyes were glazed over and her hands trembled. She didn't look a little tired, she looked like she was going to die. He tried to reach out for her but she slipped through his fingertips.
Not caring for his answer, she started to distance herself and close the door. "Thank you for today, I'll see you again for my next schedule." She stood on the other side of the threshold, leaning her head on the door.
He let out a sigh and nodded. She was drawing lines between the two. Suddenly he looked regretful and she felt like laughing. He probably regretted treating her terribly on their first meetings. "Just lock the door after I'm gone, don't open it for anyone. The security cameras are down so stay inside. If anything happens—"
"You'll be the first person to know." She finished for him with a soft smile on her face. She was never going to give him a call, she'd rather die. "Thank you and goodnight."
Reluctantly, he nodded and let go of the door and watched as it closed on his face. He heard the quiet click of the door as he stood outside.
Sera put her back to the door after she locked it and slid down to the floor. Her head on her knees as she sat in the darkened entrance so tired of it all. She was upset and angry. Slowly everything was slipping out of her control and she didn't know what to do. Usually she had a plan but now she didn't know what to do.
The wedding of her sister that she had been looking forward to was half-ruined and she couldn't even talk to anyone without being followed by Snow's dog. She almost wished it was herself that she poisoned not her allies.