i wanted to thank u guies in advance for suffering through my horrible beginning to this chapter, but I promise, by the end, you'll understand why I'm excited for this chapter! please lemme know what u think! and thanks to all for reading! i love reading all ur comments :)
What? I loved him? No, no, no, no, no! I had a childish crush on the boy I had grown up with. It was nothing more than that, a simple, small, crush. But how come it doesn’t feel that way? My annoying heart asked and I sighed. It was right, but my brain told me I was with Niall, and I loved Niall, right? No, I loved him. That was it; end of story, the end, buh-bye, nothing else, period, exclamation point.
“Uh, Care-Bear?” Harry spoke out, breaking me from whatever trance I seemed to be going into a lot lately.
“Yeah, huh sorry.” I broke eye contact with Josh who was growing a fierce blush across his fair cheeks, and turned to face the crowd. “I just wanted say before I go off and discover thirty new ways to kill Josh for embarrassing me like that, that he was my first love as well.” The crowd gasped and I dared not to look at Niall. My boldness was getting the better of me and I didn’t show that side of myself very well. “And…” I added, waiting for them to quiet down. “That I still love him, but only as a brother-figure.” I turned and smiled curtly at him before turning on my heel, walking over to Niall, pecking him swiftly on the lips, and finally walking off stage.
“What. The. Hell. Was. That?” Angel bombarded me as soon as I was out of view of the audience.
“What?” I asked innocently, secretly afraid of what scolding I was about to get.
“That,” she pointed out towards the stage. “Was the ballsiest thing I have ever experienced. But you do realize you’re a dead girl walking, right?” she asked with a smile and I choked out a laugh of relief.
“Ballsiest isn’t a word Angel,” I pointed out, attempting to change the subject from angry fangirls chasing me down with pitchforks and stabbing me to death with “I Heart 1D” pins. The image itself gave me shivers.
“It’s my word, and stop trying to change the subject. You do realize you’ll probably need witness protection. A new identity, new hair and clothes, and you will never be able to sing again. Or see me, or Niall, or Josh for that matter! God! Think of the fan sites, I can practically feel them exploding with the “1D Love Triangle”! Who do you ship? Niara or Jara?” she rambled on and on until I finally slapped my hand over her mouth and she licked it lightly.
“OK, first of all, those are some seriously wrecked ship names; you need some help on that. Also, let them talk, I don’t care! Josh professed his love to me on stage! I feel like I'm in the fucking Hunger Games! Well, nobody’s thrown me bread in the pouring rain when my dad died but the concept is the same! I was stuck between two incredibly hot and very protective guys who only wanted the best for me.
“Reality check!” Angel squealed before slapping me straight across the face, I instantly felt the sting and grabbed my reddened cheek, glaring at Angel who had a hint of a smug little smile across her perfectly glossed lips.
“What the hell!” I yelled, getting shushed by one of the stage managers who pointed to his microphone that transmitted to the boy’s ear pieces.
“You needed a fucking reality check!” Angel spat back at me. “You were mumbling something about Peeta and Gale, then your dad dying. I don’t know what’s gotten into your head lately but it seems with all this fame from being around the boys has brought out your giant ego. Get over yourself. Yes, they are the most popular band in thirty-seven countries worldwide, but your just one girl, mmkay? ONE. FUCKING. GIRL! Cool your head off!” she yelled in a lower pitch so as not to be yelled at by the stage manager again.
“Uh,” was all I could respond with. She was right; I needed a serious reality check, and a break from the boys.
“Okay, I'm sorry, I overreacted,” she hung her head and I wrapped my arms around her chest in a tight hug.
“No, I’ve been acting like a royal bitch lately. I haven’t hung out with you much since I got here. I'm sorry… tomorrow we need a girl day, complete with crashing both our debits and credits, whaddya say?” I looked at her with concerned eyes and she nodded enthusiastically.
“Yes! I need some bonding time! I have so much to tell you!” she squealed and I totally forgot about my swelling cheek. “Let’s sneak out quickly for coffee, I am in desperate need of a caramel macchiato and that stage manager is about to burst a vein if we stay here.” She pointed out and I nodded in agreement.
“Wait,” I whispered, taking a peek onstage to see the guys. “I need to sneak into Josh’s dressing room quickly for some serious payback. Yeah, he thinks he can just embarrass me like that in front of the world and get away with it?” I scoffed and Angel laughed, linking our elbows and we skipped lightly down the stage hallway to his room. I creaked inside and shut the door quickly behind us. Looking around I noticed his regular hoodie, bag, and car keys in a pile by a rack of clothing. Perfect.
“Quick!” Angle yell-whispered and I dashed away from the door towards his property, leaving Angel to guard the door. I grabbed up every item of clothing that I saw, including some that didn’t even look like his, his keys, and phone. I shoved everything into the bag and made a break for the door. Angle flung it open and we raced down the halls towards the back entrance. I felt something drop from the bag and stopped to pick it up. It was the damn keys. They echoed around the empty hallway before settling to a stop and I bent down to pick them up. The first think I noticed was the little charm he had attached to the ring. It was the charm I had given him. I ran my fingers over the cool metal, forgetting about the rush we were in to sneak out, and let all the memories flash back into my mind for one final time.
“You OK?” Angle asked and I nodded shurly, picking up the keys and tucking them back into the bag.
“Yeah,” I said honestly. “Just remembered something.” I added with a secret smile to myself. I knew Josh and I would always have those memories, but that’s just what they were, memories; I was living in the present and it was about time my mind caught up to that.
“Well let’s go stupid, before they catch us!” She grabbed my hand and we ran out into the cool air with a giant sigh.
“So where to now?” I asked and she shrugged.
“I guess there,” she said pointing to a small Dunkin Donuts a few blocks over. I smiled, hauled the heavy bag over my shoulder and we walked hand-in-hand toward out caffeine refreshments.
Josh POV
I was a douche. Plain and simple. Not only had I revealed myself in front of thousands of screaming girls, let alone the world; I had revealed my true feeling to Cara, and her boyfriend. I shut my mouth the moment I realized what I was saying, but by then it was too late, the words had come out like vomit and there was no way of taking them back. The outside world faded out the girls screaming, and focused in on Cara’s face. She gave away nothing, but her song had given away enough. “I miss your soft lips,” I mean who else would she be talking about? True it was just a song, but I knew first-hand how the lyrics of a song could give away the innermost emotions that we didn’t want anyone to know.
“Josh,” the stage manager spoke into my ear through the tiny speaker. “After questions were going straight into “C’mon C’mon.” he instructed and I nodded. I blinked realizing my scenery had changed; Cara wasn’t on stage, and Niall was sending me icy-blue daggers with his eyes. I had rarely seen the happy Irishman upset, but his jealousy was something I experienced quite often recently, and the combination of the two looks made my Adam’s apple bob up and down in my throat. The rest of the concert went on uneventfully compared to my confession and sooner than I would’ve liked, it was over. We of course stayed on stage behind the curtain for a few minutes in uncomfortable silence as they cleared out backstage and made sure no crazy can had crept back and was planning on killing us with onions in our eyes or something.
“Let’s go!” One of the other stage managers announced in a Scottish accent and we filed offstage like school boys and went our separate ways. Luckily for me, the five lads had to go get de-microphoned and wired so I scuttled off to my dressing room with a sigh of relief. I was so stressed and over-tired from the events, I couldn’t believe that just this morning Cara and I had been making out on my couch and now she was beyond pissed at me because I told her how I felt. In retrospect I could’ve told her in a less public way, any less public way, but I was caught up in the moment. If was the bloodiest idiot I had ever known, and I had had the privilege of knowing Connor, the idiot from New Jersey in the drumming competition.
“GAH!” I groaned out and walked heavily towards the bathroom, removing my sweat drenched clothing and tossing it into the soiled bin on my way. I stood in the hot rays of waters and re-envisioned my day in a minute. By the end of my shower I had concluded that I knew nothing, nor wanted to know anything about girls. I wrapped a towel around my waist and walked out to the larger dressing room in search of some sweats but couldn’t find them. I dug around in the closet but nothing turned up. I sighed; this was exactly what I needed now, I looked around for my phone but again turned up empty handed. Well shit!
“Shit!” I yelled at the top of my lungs and punched the wall that happened to be the closest to me. The second it did it, I regretted it, the wall was undamaged, and I just wished I could say the same for my hand, which hurt like hell.
“What!?” Harry barged into my room only to burst out laughing. I guess I did look kinda funny standing there in just a towel holing my hand. Zayn, Louis and Zack, the guitarist, followed closely behind him and began laughing as well. “You got him,” Harry said to his phone which made me furrow my eyebrows in confusion. Girly laughter rang from his speakers and he turned the screen to face me, showing Cara and Angle sitting somewhere else, smiling devilishly at me.
“Hey Josh,” Angel giggled and did a girly five-finger wave. I mimicked her with my tongue sticking out.
“Looking for something?” Cara laughed making me pull my facial features back to normal. She held up my blue duffle bag in view of the camera and waved it around. I could see my clothes popping out everywhere and what looked like my phone and wallet on the side.
“Cara Peters,” I growled and she simply laughed again, making my knees weak as her giggles rang like bells.
“Yes love?” she mocked a British accent and a confused look that I knew all too well to not be as innocent as she portrayed.
“Wanna bring me back my duffle?” I asked in a syrupy sweet tone.
“Nope,” she smiled and popped the ‘p’ just to annoy me. She knew I hated when people popped random letters, especially g, but p was a close second.
“Pweease?” I baby talked her. She rolled her eyes and Angel made a monkey face in my direction. “Fine,” I sighed, coming up with a quick plan. “Next time I see you, I’ll take all your clothes.” I said, making it sound way more sexual than I implied.
“Brother please, incest!” she cried out and I noticed a woman sitting behind her look around strangely.
“Ouch,” I gripped my heart in mock pain. “Love, you wound me! Girl let me love you!” I sang out horribly making her burst into another fit of giggles.
“Next time, please don’t ‘love me’ in front of thousands of fans, kay?” she asked seriously and I nodded, handing my head in regret.
“I know, I'm sorry, you know about my word vomit problems. For instance, if you asked me what was on my mind right now I would be wondering how monkeys have sex cauz of her face,” I pointed to Angle who blushed. “Do they do it in a tree, hanging upside down?”
“No honey, that’s sloths, and they take their precious time, and then rest for the rest of their life time.” Angle pointed out and I busted out a laugh, and then felt a cool breeze run along my midriff. I grabbed wildly for my falling towel but couldn’t grab it in time. Luckily Harry turned his phone towards him to spare the girls the image of my junk appearing in HD. I bent over quickly and retrieved the towel, wrapping it securely around my waist and ignoring the snickers of the other lads.
“Oh shut it, just tell Caraboo to return my clothes,” I growled before shutting my door violently in their faces. I marveled in the fact that in the single day Cara and I had gone from getting over an argument, to making out, to ignoring each other, to me pissing her off, to getting into another argument, to discussing monkey sex like nothing had ever happened. That girl made my head spin, and I didn’t want it any other way.
Cara’s POV
“You got a screen shot of that, right?” I asked as Harry turned the phone camera back to himself when Josh’s towel dropped, but not before we got a sneak peek at his little man package.
“Oh defiantly,” She laughed and I gave her a tiny high-five.
“Hey, so Josh locked us out of his room but he really wants you to bring back his clothes. But I think it’s fine if you hold onto them for a little while longer, just for amusement.” Harry responded with a little wink into the phone.
“I'm gunna go buy us some more dinks,” I said slowly and slid out of the chair, leaving Harry and Angle to talk in private. I still hadn’t been able to grill him or her about their little “kissing adventure” but I was determined to get to the bottom of it! Oh, I was totally shipping Hangilina! Yup! I reached my phone to tweet about it, like a normal American girl would, and found it wasn’t there. I checked everywhere, basically giving myself a pat down before concluding I was phoneless. Shit, I must have left it back at the stage.
“Hey Ang, I'm gunna go run back and grab my phone.” I yelled at her, grabbing Josh’s bag before walking out the door to her waving me off, obviously more interested in whatever Harry had to say. It had begun to rain so ran towards the back alleys that connected the block to the stage. The darkness creped me out and I ran as quickly as I could towards the small light at the end of the damp tunnel. The large bag caught on a piece of old pipe handing off of one of the brick buildings causing it to pull me down to the ground forcefully.
“Great,” I muttered, observing my newly torn pants and bleeding knee.
“Hey sweetheart, need some help,” a large man who reeked of booze and smoke tumbled out of the side door, blocking my exit.
“No thank you…” I stuttered out, standing up quickly and slipping again on the slick pavement.
“Come on love,” he reached down a meaty hand and pressed it against my shoulder, keeping me pinned to the ground on my now ferociously bleeding knee cap. “What’s the rush?”
“My friends are waiting for me.” I said indicating towards the entrance I had come from. He was breathing heavily next my face, and it took great restraint not to gag at his foul odor.
“No they’re not.” He laughed a drunken-man’s hearty chuckle before placing his other clammy hand on my chest and shoving me backwards against the brick wall. The rain was pouring heavily now and I couldn’t tell the difference between it, and the salty tears that ran streaming down my cheeks.
“Please,” I choked out. “Please no!” I cried but he couldn’t hear me. In one final attempt I lunged for the bag and dragged my hand around inside, looking for Josh’s phone. The giant grabbed my legs and pulled me away from the bag and slid me across the ally to hit the other brick wall. I hit wildly at the phone in front of me, praying I would call someone who could come and save me.
“Hello?” the heavy British accent I recognized picked up the other end.
“Help!” I cried out, losing my voice in the heavy sound of the rain slapping against the pavement.
“Don’t worry love, I’ll take good care of you,” the drunkard slurred and leaned over me. I closed my eyes and waited for my nightmare to be over, and to finally wake up. But no such treasures eluded me, I was helpless. “Don’t you worry,” the giant whispered leaning in closer and placing yet another large hand across my stomach. Where was my British savior?
so yeah, another long update for a long wait... sorry! Cauz of Nemo, who isnt in Australia anymore, i didnt have school friday and i spent most of the day working on plot lines since i was so stuck on this one! @ReadingHorses and I went, well tried to go snowshoing, and ended up just being penguins and sliding downhill on our bellies :) what can i say, we got 3 fricken feet of snow!
if anyone wants to make me blue jello i am seriously craving that right now!
shoutouts to @ReadingHorses and @BooBearBabe99 who have the wierdest discussions in a group chat, somehow got to the nationality of goats...? I...
SEMI IS COMING UP! AND ITS GIRLS-ASK! my friend @AmyJohanson asked her kinda BF AJ to the dance and he said yes in the cutest way! gah! love ya! hahaha anyways
yes swim team has ended, saddly we didnt win our league, but we got second! and for a team thats only really existed on its own for 2 years that really impressive!
I enjoy creating bears at buildabear... its a fun time, even if your 15 :P
i was gunna say something else but its late, and this is a lot of words and im tired....
HOPE U ENJOYED THE UPDATE! :)
Hangilina anyone? :)))