The Switch
Chapter 10
Kragan's family was of course so excited at the prospect of being invited to not only be Yekmenian's but be in nobility as the whole family was eager to move here. You watched on as Kragan's family eagerly signed the written offers from Audrey and Lukher. Thaddius and Astrin as well as Kragan and yourself and his siblings who were of marriagable age and ready to strike out on their own- looked for a good place to build your estates on among the lands.
You looked at what parcels of land had the best access to roads- so that it was easily accessible. Also that it always had a good fresh water supply for plumbing. Where it wouldn't be prone to any storms or damage from the elements but also where the land was fertile to plant gardens and even a vineyard and an orchard and grazing lands for any flocks so that the estate would have a good food supply along with electricity. But the thing was- every piece of land had those things and you were spoiled for choice before you chose based on what the views would be like.
The Yekmenian National Bank- which was the official title of the bank that Queen Audravienne had opened for her citizens. That had been a portion of the Yekmenian Royal Treasury- would give Kragan amazing rates of interest for any money he would deposit. You immediately deposited the rest of your funds that you had on hand. Audrey was more than happy to take actual gold bricks and bars- melt them down - add adani to them to make them adani gold drakars. And then deposited them into the accounts. Which each drakar was a third of the size of a gold bouillon brick from Solowards. So she- in one fell swoop immediately tripled your money for the price of a single gold bouillon in exchange for all the adani mineral to do it.
You talked with Audrey very extensively about your own ideas and visions for what The Contessina Ships, and their ports would all eventually look like and feel like when the guest was on board. And how you could make a universally pleasing layout where the details and the finishes could be customized to suit the buyer. Tests were run to see how thin the materials could be made so that things like marble tiles for floors and walls wouldn't necessarily be all that heavy. But be durable to withstand the forces that would be put onto them when in use. And wouldn't crack depending on how heavy the person walking on them would be. You and Audrey used Thobin as your test subject to make sure that especially ships made for Dorierra- orcs of his size could easily walk through the entire ship. And especially learn the layout quickly and for there to be a safe room to easily get a bride and her party into it, defend the vessel, safely manuver the vessel out of danger and then get back on course. Audrey insisted that they build a mock up of the basic inner layout of the ship in a courtyard to make sure everything would be at the right height and width- just for the Dorierran ships. While the other ships didn't necessarily have to be so accommodating of the larger builds of Dorierran orcs. Before you reached a decision of a set of parameters for each size of ship depending on how big and massive and sprawling the ship could be and how big the guests on board would be.
All of Yekmeni and the surrounding colonies were overjoyed to be working on not just Salgria Shipping Ships but especially The Contessina Ships since mouras naturally had a flare and love for the luxurious when possible and would be doing a fair bit of the finishing work. The rest of your personal wealth was poured into an account that would pay the laborers to build the ships, and would pay the artisans for their beautiful crafts and workmanship and craftmanship to finish the ship. Since the ships would be built in three stages. The first stage- building the "skeleton" of the ship. Then the "fleshing out" stage and finally "finishing" stage.
Audrey insisted that stone timber pines from the West Coast of Nuvaric from where Stormbreaker was- where her friend Benyana was the Clan Chieftess would be the best wood in all of the supersphere to use to flesh out the ships. Because while it took a bit to get used to working with it, it lasted usually at least ten times as long as any other wood. And surely between adani steel in the frame of The Contessina Ships themselves, and the stone timber pine in the hauls and inner frames and walls. The Contessina Ships could always get upgrades and face lifts in finishing materials while also lasting at least a few lifetimes or at least a few generations of owners. And then all the various colors of marble to finish out the interiors of the ships would appeal to a variety of tastes and beautiful and wonderfully intricate but durable carpets to go on the floors whether they be stone or wood- for easy cleaning would be ideal. So that each one both looked and felt like a proper palace when you were on board the ships themselves.
But after your initial healing from the stones- the more medicine that you took from Dr. Hayati- the worse you began to feel. The feeling of impending death slowly crept back into your heart and mind. And feeling that the number of your days start to tick down slowly became more poignant. You felt like you were cramming as much as possible into each and every single minute so that Audrey would have the same vision you did of the ships as both of you made dozens of finishing sets. With samples of marble, paints for the walls. Woods for the trim and finishes and sketches both vague yet detailed for every kind of ship as you both broke it down to a bare bones model that would be a base model and then built up from there before Lukher, Audrey, Kragan and yourself came up with the largest and most luxurious one as each variant had it's own added title. And the most grand designed Kragan named The Contessina Magnifica. And it would be very much- a floating palace. And while the smaller skyships would look like little toy boats in the clouds. The Contessina Magnifica would look large enough even from the ground that one would feel like they could reach up and pluck it from the sky with their hand and it would come with a crew of smaller defensive ships to fly around it in formation to protect it and the occupants from any would be attackers.
The plan was that once the ships had their adani steel frames, like a steel skeleton- and adani anti-gravity disks and adani propulsion engines and the beginning of the plumbing and electrical wiring installed- the ships would then be flown to Drauch to be "fleshed out" by the stone timber pines and then sailed back to Yekmeni to be finished.
Kragan poured most of his money into the sails for the Contessina Ships. They would be a brand new wonder of engineering. The sails themselves would not only harness the wind- but the sunshine too. And even moonlight - as an energy source. Skyships had something of windmills at the bottom that helped turn a turbine engine which in turn would help turn the paddles of the windmills like propellers of a seaship.
But because of the very advanced technology in Yekmeni and thanks to the ingenuity of not just the native Yekmenians but the mouras in the surrounding colonies- Kragan invented a new propulsion engine that was a turbine of but blades that would cut through the air faster than a propeller. And the engine turbines could be put on the bottom of the ship and with just a move of a lever and a joystick- could me moved and maneuvered in any direction so that the ship could move in any direction for ease of movement and quickness of movement so that you didn't have to go at whatever the wind speeds were.
And the engineers and artisans at Yekmeni made a special cloth that was both machine and cloth that had special cells that would capture sunlight and turn it into electrical energy to help power the ship, charge the batteries and the generator and engines and anti-gravity disks and the turbines. And where the SSCS woven into the sails themselves- that thread would actually glitter during the daylight and glow at night. Especially under moonlight since the sails were dyed in special dye that would make the sails glow as if under blacklight at night and if a light were shone on them- from a lighthouse or in a storm- the sails themselves would reflect back as if painted with light reflecting paint. The sails themselves were an utter marvel too and would soon be put to use in the regular Salgria Shipping boats. And with the different classes- the sails themselves could have their designation. So that the sails of The Contesssina Magnifica Ships would have SSCS-M on the ships so that even at a distance you could tell what class Contessina Ship it was.
All of it was so exciting yet it was a bitter sweet process for you. Because while Kragan and yourself threw yourselves into this project. You knew you would probably never see it completed. But what a wonder these ships would be when they were finished. And what fortunes they would make Kragan and his family- you could only fathom and fantasize about, as you would draw and paint picture after picture of possible looks based on Kragan's initial design which ended up being the middle of the road model- called Originale.
But as the feeling of impending doom grew stronger and things seemed to settle on specific plans and less about theory and more about making those theories into realities- you had been in Yekmeni a month. And while Audrey and Lukher always made Kragan and his family and yourself feel at ease and welcome here. This was not to place to reveal your truth. Because you knew the moment you did, especially if you did it here- it would kill all enthusiasm for the project and kill it in it's tracks. And as much as you loved and enjoyed seeing Kragan soar so high in mind, heart and spirit. You didn't have the heart to take the air from under his wings just as he finally achieved his new height. But you also didn't want Kragan to wake up next to a dead corpse either. So you finally suggested that his family at least go home, and start to pack up their home and say their goodbyes and meet with their other family and friends in Forestrong.
Kragan's older siblings basically told their mother to pack up their stuff and ship it here because they were excited to get their own building of their own houses and estates underway. Especially when so many of them already had a prospective mate already here in Yekmeni, or in Stormbreaker. Especially as Kragan's brother Thaire was excited to get to Stormbreaker and see Brock's younger sister Salri, as he volunteered to be in Drauch. And specifically Stormbreaker to oversee all the stone timber pine works.
Audrey insisted that you spend your last night at Yekmeni under the stones "just in case the first time had missed anything". But you knew she was really just trying to buy you more time again as both of you did your best to act like nothing was wrong. Which got harder and harder for Audrey to do when she noticed you try so hard and struggle with keeping up the appearance that you were fine.
When really, every day you woke up and pulled yourself out of bed was a feat. And Audrey could tell you were growing tired and weary. And when you told her that you could feel the end coming near again, she made sure to shut down any reasons for keeping you and Kragan here. She took on more and more of the directive control of The Contessina Project for you. You trusted her judgment and her tastes implicitly because no greater friend or ally had you made than her. And she herself was angry and upset that Dorierra would dare charge you so much to heal you. But she didn't seek any other advice or council of anyone else, out of respect for keeping the matter of your personal health a private matter only for you to decide.
And while you got to go to the colonies, you were too scared to approach a healer and make any kind of inquiries because you were too afraid of the price they would ask. And too afraid of Kragan's reaction and what he would risk or spend or leverage to try and help. Astrin had already had to tell him that he needed to wait for a few months to get more funds to pour into The Contessina Project because every bit of profit and income that wasn't earmarked to care for the family and it's needs or the company, it's workers and it's needs- was being dumped into The Contessina Project already. And you could already sense that things were beginning to be strapped tight.
Even with Audrey's generosity with turning any gold money or even paper money- using Dorierra's exchange rates as her own- to gauge and calculate the wealth in your accounts - as even the interest accumulated was being spent as quickly as it could be accrued. And you just knew that if you said something now- everything would stop. People's jobs and livelihoods were now on the line and hanging in the balance and you could not in good conscience deprive countless people- their means of income- just to prolong your own life. The needs of many outweighed your single life.
But at the same time. You knew Kragan would be furious that you had kept this from him your whole marriage. He had given you countless opportunities to tell him and to come clean about it. And you were still too afraid to fully open up because you didn't want things- that were finally going right- as all your plans were finally being put into actions- to end. You didn't want to see how much he would be hurt and betrayed by this. And you loved him too much and cared for him too much to want him to suffer at all, or to be in any kind of pain or distress. And so- out of fear- you let him stay in blissful ignorance- trying to keep the blissful state intact for as long as possible. While also pushing off the inevitable for as long as possible. By Solowardian Law- a groom could sue his inlaws in the first two months of marriage for a "lame" bride. And you did everything in your power to make it to that second month. And you were only mere weeks away from it. But at the same time. You only hoped that you had that much time left at all.
While you had stayed in Yekmeni, between Audrey ordering more clothes for you in the Yekmenian style so that you could always be comfortable, and even "sold" you jewelry at a very reduced rate so that you looked and felt more Yekmenian by the day. It still didn't feel real to you. You still felt like a fish out of water and just a traveller- passing through, never staying for too long.
Audrey even happily let you hold Ahi as much as you wanted. Since she knew you probably would never get a chance to hold a baby of your own. That and Ahi was just the sweetest baby. And had fat rolls for days and always hot so he barely wore a diaper most of the time. And between looking at him, and Ashurah's son Harashu and Masairra's twins Jahoel and Jahaline. All of them were this big and this chunky which thier fathers claimed almost all orc babies- at least very well fed ones looked like that and were the epitome of health. He was more olive green than brown as his coloring was almost exactly like the forest floor, save for his bright yellow eyes. But Kragan only seemed to be more turned on every time you held either Ahi or any of the other babies because he was bound and determined to give you a baby of your own.
Once you finally left Yekmeni, you stopped off at Drauch and Stormbreaker and commissioned for not just stone timbers to be cut down, but for every one that was cut down- two more would be planted in its place on Stormbreaker lands since Stormbreaker had a magnificent stone timber pine forest in it's territory and since Stormbreaker, Drauch and Suchi had become allies with Yekmeni. And Brock and Yana being close friends with Lukher and Audrey- it seemed only natural that you would take Lukher and Audrey's advice and go to the best and most abundant source of stone timber pines- that would give you a very good price for such a precious material- if they got to work with it themselves and while they understood that sky ships and seaships were similar- they had key differences too but Stormbreaker seemed up to the task to learn and do all they could.
Meeting Brock and Yana was like meeting old friends too- as Kragan and Brock were just as good of friends as Kragan was with Lukher. And Yana- while different from Audrey, was very fun to be with and be around. And getting introduced to more of the mountain moura colony culture was a wonderful experience. And their little Brive was just too precious. He was six months younger than Ahi but his pastel mint green skin and bright golden blonde hair in beautiful little curls was darling. And he was just as happy and gregarious as Ahi was. And he was about as round as he was long with lots of fat rolls himself. His little limbs seeming nothing but little fat rolls which was a very good sign of infant health. And to see so many other mouras married into the Stormbreaker Clan and so many hybrid children was amazing. While heartwarming, affirming and reassuring for Kragan. It was bittersweet for you to see it because you knew in your heart that there was no way for you to give Kragan such a priceless gift.
The clan was all too happy to agree and happily took on the building contract. Part of Drauch was changed by the mouras in Stormbreaker to make adequate room for the ships and the lumber yards and the skyship yards. Work was immediately started- felling trees and preparing the wood for the curing process so that when Yekmeni would send out their "bare bones" ships. They would get "fleshed out" here- by adding the stone timber pine wood planks and fill out the haul and would be the beams for the walls and masts for the sails. As Kragan happily gave Brock and Thaire the construction plans for each and every single class of Contessina Ship that would be coming to be "fleshed out". And then once the boat was fully-"fleshed out" - it would be towed back to Yekmeni to get the finishing touches put into it and the rest of the plumbing and electrical wiring installed along with the sails.
Brock and Yana were especially happy for the opportunity because it meant that the forest wouldn't get depleted. Because it would be in a constant state of being replanted as areas where the trees had already been felled to build the ever growing town of Stormbreaker. It also meant work and even more income- independent from their seafood sales at Suchi. Drauch and even Vraum could be stopping points for the Contessina Ships. Since Drauch and Vraum were unique in the world and soon gaining interest in as a world wonder to have floating cities made out of clouds that could move on the wind, even to other colonies around the world.
Kragan and yourself were given a move in ready estate in Drauch to stay in while you would be there in the future. All you needed to move in were your clothing, food and other household supplies. But otherwise the estate itself was fully furnished and Yana used her own palatial home to use as the basis for it as she and the other mouras used the home as thanks for bringing Salgria Shipping and The Contessina Shipping Project to them and give them that much more independance from Suchi financially.
But after your dealings with Stormbreaker- the weariness of traveling was soon felt in your bones and you just wanted to rest. You still didn't want to tell Kragan in Stormbreaker either. Your fears intensified while the feeling of impending doom was getting too great to ignore. Even with the second healing from the stones, which you felt gave you about another month of life. Now you only had a week before the two month mark and you wanted Kragan to be at home by then. And with just a little bit of pleading- Kragan finally caved and brought you to his home so that you could fully rest and recover from moving from room to room, bed to bed and rest and recover from your efforts being poured into The Contessina Project ever since you got married.
And while Kragan was embarrassed by his home's simpleness and plainness. You assured him and reassured him that you didn't need anything that fancy. You just wanted to finally have a rest without having to work on the project or having to worry about when you would need to go somewhere else to take care of the next thing. You just wanted a break from all of that.
So Kragan and his parents and his younger siblings brought you to their surprisingly humble home and with Kragan's older siblings no longer with you- Mildred packed up their things into trunks for Thaddius to send them and took up the room right next to yours so that she was always as close as possible.
You were just grateful it was a home. You slept on the couch while Kragan and Captain Tilge moved your mattress and other things from the Violet Skye into Kragan's room. And while it wasn't that much of a room as far as size or opulance. You were just grateful to get a room where your bed wasn't moving with the winds and stayed still. Because while it had taken you a while to get "your sky legs" so to speak. You missed solid ground. And you missed laying still and laying in a bed that was yours through and through. Where it didn't feel like you were a guest but that was yours. Even as welcoming Audrey had made Yekmeni and Yana had made Drauch and Tilge had made the Violet Skye- it all still felt like Souja Tavern to you. None of it didn't quite feel like home to you. And your soul demanded that you needed to rest in your true- home. Not a house that you were calling home for the time being with Kragan on your travels.
Mildred regretfully woke you up when the room was ready and dinner was ready as you sleepily went to the dining room and tiredly ate. Barely able to keep your eyes open as you tried to eat. Kragan noticed your extreme fatigue and insisted that he help you to bed because you still looked so tired you were about to fall over and fall face first into your soup as Astrin seemed a little giddy at the development of you becoming increasingly tired ever since Yekmeni.
Kragan helped you into bed and you didn't even get a chance to take your nightly medicine before you were fast asleep as soon as your body all but collapsed into bed.
"I'm really worried about Tessa." Kragan admitted when he rejoined his remaining family around their dining room table.
"I'm not." Astrin grinned wider as she continued to eat what was at the table and keeping a watchful eye on her kids to make sure they were eating off of their own plates and not taking food from their sibling's plates.
"Why?" Kragan asked his mom.
"Kragan, it's been a month and a half since she got off that gods awful medicine from Solowards in Yekmeni. And she hasn't had her menstruation since the wedding. Some women, when they're really early in the pregnancy- just tend to sleep a lot because their bodies are too busy making another person." Astrin hinted as Kragan gasped softly.
"Really?" Kragan asked excitedly.
"Yes really. But it's still too early for the pregnancy to show up on the traditional tests. It'll be another two months at least. But I'll bet you- your britches that she's already with child. The two of you have done nothing else nearly day and night for the last two months but try. Some women just get super tired in the beginning of their pregnancies and I think she's one of them." Astrin ventured.
Mildred hung back from re-entering the dining room as tears flooded her eyes. If only they knew. She didn't even re-enter the dining room. And instead retired to her own room for the night. Much to Tilge's disappointment because he was hoping to finally get invited to stay in Mildred's room with her. Because the two had grown their own relationship and had become quite close. Tilge always practically bending over backwards to help and support and befriend and charm Mildred and try to sweep her off her feet.
But Mildred still refused physical closeness or intimacy. And still kept him at arm's reach emotionally and mentally. Which Tilge had thought she was just playing hard to get. But really it was Mildred knowing that soon, you would pass. And that soon, she'd be going back to Solowards to live and serve out the rest of her life at your family's estate. Despite you saying that once you passed, she was free to do with her life as she pleased. And that if she didn't want to go back to Solowards, she didn't have to or was obligated to. And while she had always served with distinction, she was not a slave. And didn't belong or was owned by you or anyone else in your family. You had paid her double for following you and helping you with the last moments of your life. And you just wanted her to be happy.
Mildred came back into your room and simply sat on the bed and lovingly pet your head and running her fingertips through your hair. Remembering with bittersweetness- all the memories of watching you grow up. And now to be so young but already at the end of your life- Mildred felt it wasn't fair at all. That the world's sweetest and brightest shining star would only shine so bright for such a short time. It would just be another few days before it would be past the marriageable probationary time period. You were almost there. And she would personally see to it that if you made it there and a day longer- she would consider it a job well done.
Mildred wiped the tears streaming down her cheeks and used her handkerchief to sniffle into because carrying this weight with you had been just as equally heavy for her to carry too. She felt like a coward for hiding behind the 'It's not my place' rule of serving a master. She could now only hope and pray you could live out for the rest of the week. She had mentally dug her heels in and would be seeing to you as if you were an invalid if she needed to. And had actually had a vial of actual poison that she had hidden inside a small board game that the doctors had given her that if and when your suffering was stretching on and you were suffering senselessly. She could end it for you. Mildred did her best to regain her composure before she checked to make sure you were still breathing before she left the room when she heard someone climb the stairs and the stairs creek and groan with the movement.
"She's still sleeping Sir. Good night Sir." Mildred offered when she saw it was Kragan before she slipped into her room when all Kragan did was nod in understanding.
"Goodnight Mama Mildred." He offered her retreating form as she did her little waive as she shut the door and no sooner had she hid herself in her room before she did her best to weep as silently as she could as she got the poison out and made sure it was now at the ready for when you would need it before she slid into bed and silently cried herself to sleep.
You barely registered Kragan coming to bed, as the mattress shifted with his weight before he gathered you into his arms and his warmth seep into you as Kragan noticed that the heat pattern of your body had changed now that he took a moment to really become attuned to you.
There was heat pooling in your abdomen. Usually you were always just a touch colder than him. But now, he could distinctly feel the warmth all collect and pool in your abdomen. Even to his well trained and sensitive touch- your abdomen, that now no longer had so much pain. He could feel that your lower belly was in fact just barely larger than normal. He couldn't help but tear up and smile at the thought that you were pregnant. Then he shimmied down in the bed and noticed that your womanhood even smelled slightly different. A little stronger and more potent but while his mouth watered, he wouldn't give into his craving for it and risk waking you up.
"If you're in there. I'm here. And it doesn't matter if you're a son or a daughter, I will love you with my whole heart and soul regardless." Kragan whispered before he pressed a soft kiss into your belly. Before wriggling back up and gathering you in his arms. He didn't know how else to sleep now. He didn't care what bed he had to sleep on or how rich the room was furnished. If you were comfortable, that's all that he cared about. And the last two months had been the best and most exciting months of his life. And he felt like you were the catalyst that would give him all the motivation he needed to build you an empire- worthy of your name. And give you something worthy for you to rule over, besides his heart, mind and soul. You could sleep for the next nine months straight if it meant that you would be ok and that if you were carrying a child, that that child would be happy and healthy.
But Kragan woke up alone in the bed in the morning and only the sound of you vomiting in the grass outside of his bedroom as Mildred was already up and dressed and helping you as you laid in the yard since his house didn't have indoor plumbing.
"Tessa! Are you ok?" Kragan asked as he came downstairs and out of the house in a robe.
"Yeah, I tried taking my morning medicine. I threw it right back up and even the smell of it is making me sick and I didn't want to wake you or anyone else up." You croaked as you looked miserable as Mildred was nearby with a bucket of water and a steaming teapot as she poured you a cup from her pocket and poured you a cup of peppermint tea for nausea.
"Well if it's making you sick, stop taking it altogether." Kragan urged you.
"You have felt worse the more you've taken Dr. Hayati's medicine. It isn't the same as your old medicine. Your old medicine never made you this sick." Mildred commented.
"But the old medicine was still harming me internally, period. And even by now, I would be weaning off the old altogether. Maybe the doctors didn't put enough Green Tansey with the Violet Eye or something. I've just felt awful since I started taking the new medicine. Like I feel like I never should have taken anything after those stones did what they could. And Hayati didn't say that I would feel worse before I would feel better or anything like that. Maybe I should just stop taking it all together and see how I fare for a few days." You ventured.
"Yeah, I think that's wise Tessa." Kragan readily agreed.
"Tessa? Are you ok Hun?" Astrin asked as she came out of the house in her robe and came over.
"Yeah, just feeling really nauseous this morning. Just the smell of Dr. Hayati's medicine made me hurl." You admitted as Astrin smiled brightly.
"Well that's normal. I would think it's morning sickness. Besides, when a woman comes to be with child, her tastes change and her sense of smell becomes much more acute." Astrin hinted as Mildred turned to look at to see how you would react.
"It's a possibility." You tried to smile politely before another wave hit you and you hugged your other bucket and hurled into it. That little bit of peppermint tea coming back up and out in a hurry.
"I know just the thing for you hun. Let me get it prepared for you." Astrin urged as she went back into the house.
"Do you think you might be with child?" Kragan asked as he sat down in the grass with you.
"If the blood in my underwear this morning is an indication- no." You muttered as you spit out the vomit tainted saliva in your mouth into the bucket.
"Oh, so your moon blood did come, it just came late." Kragan noted as his shoulders dropped a little in disappointment.
"Well either way, we should stop the medicine regardless." You insisted to Mildred.
"Yes. I can have it disposed of by this afternoon." Mildred offered.
"No, just..hang onto it for a while. And we'll see if this resolves with me no longer taking it." You urged her.
"Ok." Mildred agreed before a messenger came to the house as Kragan stood and saw who it was.
"Is everything ok?" Kragan asked as he came up to them and greeted them.
"Yes, the first three Contessina Ship steel frames were finished yesterday. They are being towed to Drauch in Stormbreaker as we speak. But Stormbreaker didn't think they would be done that fast and doesn't have the plank steamers ready and the trees haven't even been cut down into planks yet, let alone dried out or aged or anything." He answered.
"Kragan." You called out as Mildred helped you hobble over as you had overheard what the messenger had to say.
"Hmm?" Kragan asked.
"If they don't have the plank steamers, are there extra steamers that can be pulled from your other shipyards that can be brought to Drauch? And you can build new ones in Drauch while the others are still working in Drauch? Don't hold up production just because Yekmeni worked faster than Drauch did. Even if you have to pull whole crews from here in Forestrong or Fitsdale or wherever just to train the new builders in Drauch? They know how to build fishing boats in Drauch but this is a new venture for everyone. They'll need all the help they can get." You put to him.
"It's either that or have the ships brought to the other shipyards but if I do that. Stormbreaker won't be pleased because I gave the contract to them for their cheaper but better lumber." Kragan answered.
"Do you have workers that can go and stay anywhere? Drauch is still plenty big enough and has plenty of empty houses to host all kinds of families if they need to. You can either rent out the spaces for the workers to stay or you can outright buy the whole neighborhood in Drauch from Brock and Yana just for the shipbuilders to stay and give them a raise for moving just to accommodate the move. And Drauch has all kinds of amenities that make moving to it wonderful. Audrey literally tripled our money in Yekmeni. Take a third of it to buy the section in Drauch if you have to. And the food is awesome in both Stormbreaker and Drauch. Just go to Brock- get the ok. And then go to your shipyards and ask for volunteers. And the bonus of your workers moving to where you need them should be enough of an incentive." You urged him.
"But we just got home yesterday. You need me here to.." Kragan began to argue.
"I'll be fine. Just let me stay here and rest and recuperate. I'll join up with you later or you can come back and get me once you get this sorted out. Duty and business calls, you need to answer it. Don't let me hold you back. This needs immediate attention and immediate action. Give it the attention it needs and take the action it requires." You urged him.
"But I don't want to leave you. What if you need me for...something?" Kragan frowned.
"I have Mama Mildred. She'll take care of me the same way she always has. I'm in good hands. And between her and whoever else wants to stay behind. I'll be fine." You reassured him even though right now, you could barely keep standing because of your depleting strength.
"You sure?" Kragan put to you.
"I'm positive." You nodded.
"Go, get your father, discuss what you can do and how you can make this work and what you need to do next. It'll be fine. You're a very intelligent man, you'll figure it out." You reassured him before Kragan caved and brought the messenger inside. Just as Astrin was in the middle of making breakfast for the family herself as Mildred immediately tried to pitch in and at least help and over breakfast.
Thaddius and Kragan agreed that your solution was best and would have to leave when they hadn't even unpacked. Kragan laid with you one more time but he found that there seemed to be a wall to keep himself from seating fully into you this time but he was just happy he could give you your pleasure twice before getting his own before finally pulling himself from you and hoping that that seed would have a chance to take root if the others hadn't.
"The moment you need me or want me or get hungry for me, you call me ok?" He urged you.
"Ok." You agreed before you kissed him sweetly and saw him off. Wishing you had more time and wishing you could have had a chance to tell him the truth but you didn't want the truth of the matter to derail him. Not when The Contessina Project was getting underway much faster than you had anticipated.
By nightfall it was just Astrin, and her younger children, Mildred and yourself left in the house. You stayed out and watched Kragan and Thaddius and Tilge board the Violet Skye and shrink to barely a speck in the dusk as the sun set and the glorious colors of the sunset stretched out over the sky. And even as beautiful as it was, it felt like Kragan had taken your heart from your chest when he left.
You just sat in the grass and cried. Because in the end- all those chances to tell Kragan the truth, had officially slipped through your fingers like sand or water. And you felt so unworthy of Kragan's love and trust. Because you knew he kept no secrets from you. And you hated yourself for keeping this from him. You hated being a coward, and you hated the fact that you didn't have the strength to go with him. And you hated the fact that even at his childhood home- you still didn't feel at home. But you couldn't go home to Solowards and your family's estate now. This is where you asked Kragan to take you and to leave you. And this would be where you would die. Alone- except for Mildred.
So here you sat, sobbing in the soft grass- knowing you were never going to see your husband face to face again.