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Agnes couldn't believe they felt the need to have an Anniversary Party before their 5th anniversary. In her opinion, even five didn't seem like it necessarily justified it's own event. She brushed it off. Molly had made it seem extremely important and as always Agnes just wanted to come through and make it fun. Agnes really suspected though they were just itching for an excuse to gather with friends, drink, and send Juli off to a sitter. Getting married and having a baby that rapidly had likely left them a little disconnected, which was reasonable, to be fair. She didn't blame them for wanting to take some time for themselves, but she thought doing it under the guise of an Anniversary Party seemed unnecessary. Nevertheless, she played along like a good sister and helped organize.
She huffed quite a bit the day of... She was constantly wrapped up in some kind of tension with college less than 6 months away and her relationship with James on the rocks. She was getting restless and less tolerant as she went. Being around anyone felt like a chore and she had to consciously combat it. Today she was particularly twitchy with everyone and then there was the party tonight. She tried to keep it to herself. She helped herself to a beer long before the party to try to numb up that feeling. She rolled her eyes at herself while she tipped the beer back.
"Don't get obliterated tonight." Molly commented walking by the kitchen.
Agnes closed her eyes and repressed the bitchy response that immediately sprang to her mouth. "Isn't that the point of underage drinking?" She replied lightly and tried to laugh. That was a stupid response too. She rocked her head sided to side as she mulled it over Ehh could have been worse.
"Fair enough, but at least hold off for now." She asked. Agnes didn't respond, but tried her best to playfully eye her sister as she tipped the beer back for a long drink.
Molly reached for it and Agnes swung herself out of reach without pulling the drink from her lips.
"Please!" Molly begged. "Wait until everyone gets here. C'mon don't mess up tonight by getting too drunk!"
Agnes pulled down the drink and her face pinched up as she looked at her sister. She tried her hardest not to let the "fuck you" comment boil to the surface and fall out of her mouth. She pulled a breath through her teeth and tried to make her irritation less obvious. She followed it up with a smile. "No problem." She slid the beer onto the kitchen counter and went back to pulling chips and snacks out of the cupboard.
Molly picked up the beer and smiled as she took a swig. "Thank you. You'll have a lot more fun, if you don't over do it too early."
"Yeah, I got it. Thanks." Agnes took the chips into the table and started pouring them into bowls. She couldn't help but sound snarky. All the memories of taking care of Molly when she drank too much came flooding into her head. It was one fucking beer, what was her problem? She closed her eyes and tried to breathe. It's not your day, she reminded herself, just try to get through this party and then we can isolate ourselves. Her thoughts paused as she exhaled. But she is being SUCH a bitch. She argued with herself. We just have to get through this. It's one night. Just push it down. The other part of her head that wanted to fight tried its best to fall in line.
The rest of the evening leading up to the party wasn't much better. Molly insisted Agnes put on a nicer blouse and "Agnes, why don't you do your make up?" to which Agnes clearly resisted. She wasn't in the mood for any of this. "C'mon do yourself up for James. He'd love that."
"He's been trapped with me for years. A little make up won't dazzle him."
"Oh c'mon... just get into the spirit. Christ, you've been such a downer lately."
Agnes at that point just wanted to fucking destroy something like actually just break something. Molly could not have been more of a bitch, just throwing these things in her face all night. She wasn't letting up and all Agnes wanted was to be alone, but out of obligation she was surrounding herself with people. They were her friends too, but she wanted nothing to do with this. She was so tired and disconnected. This was all just so hard. She fought back the mental break down rather than let her unstable mood wander off into her own emotions. She went to get the make up out of her car and just did what Molly asked.
"Aww." Molly cooed when she saw Agnes in her make up and new outfit. "You look so good. We'll get a bunch of pictures tonight."
"The pictures will be of you and Chris. This whole thing is about you two."
"Well, yeah of course." She seemed caught off guard. "I'll want a few of all of us though like I always do."
Agnes raised her hands outwards slightly and then dropped them back to her side. "Okay, welp, you got what you wanted I'm all done up."
"Perfect timing too. James, Collin, and Collin's girlfriend are here."
"Why is Collin here? Isn't he really just James's friend?"
"Well yeah." Molly answered. "but this wasn't like an exclusive thing we invited a lot of your friends to be here too. We just wanted to have a big get together."
She forced herself not to roll her eyes. Agnes couldn't for the life of her imagine whom Molly had considered Agnes's friends. And on top of that, the idea of her friends trying to be too much in her space tonight almost set her off. She just wanted to fucking go home.
Before Agnes had to pretend that was a great idea, James popped around the corner of the bathroom.
"Hey, hey good looking." He said and immediately wrapped himself up in Agnes.
Molly took her cue to leave and made for the stairs to greet people as they arrived.
Agnes wrapped her arms around James. She didn't want to be around anyone. She was so easy to set off right now, but she liked feeling James against her. She hugged him tightly and it didn't end.
"Hey." He pulled her back. "Are you doing alright?"
She shook her head and frowned. "I wanna go home."
"Tonight will be fun. I know you've been having a rough time, but a party might help get you out of this funk."
"I don't wanna be here. I want to go home. Can we just leave early and say I'm sick?"
"Baby, c'mon. Let's just try to have fun tonight."
And there it was. It was like he just cut the single thread that was connecting her to him tonight. She was finding comfort in his presence, right up until this moment. Now, she felt towards him much like she felt toward Molly tonight.
"Yeah, whatever. You're right." She spun up her same agreeable responses she used on Molly. Let everyone get to drinking and then cut out, the little voice whispered. There is a fairly good chance that if James and Chris got into their buddy-buddy drinking that night that not even James would really notice she left. Just play along for now. Don't make this about you. Don't be selfish. They're making you mad, but just hang tight for now. She kept trying to pep talk herself. She kept going back and forth trying to decide if the anger she had rolling in her body was justified or not. She was so irritable that she thought maybe it was in her head, but it didn't make it anymore controllable.
Agnes and James joined the party, but Agnes mostly followed his lead. She felt incapable tonight. Her usual charm of keeping a conversation flowing was no where to be found so she added comments here and there to play along. She eventually broke off from James and found herself in the kitchen nursing the same beer from the beginning of the night. The comment from Molly had made her feel some type of weird shame towards having a drink at all that night. She stared out the window finally getting a break when Molly pulled her aside.
Can I not just get a fucking moment over here?
"Hey you, I've got a surprise announcement. Come here."
She's fucking pregnant again. Great, now she can lay on twice the guilt about babysitting. Her mind did that jarring mindset jump. Stop that. You love Julianna.
They went and stood in the archway between the kitchen and the living room (really the hallway, but that's neither here nor there).
"Everyone!" Molly shouted. "I wanted to thank you all for coming tonight! This is definitely a great way to celebrate our Anniversary, but we've got something else on top of that to share with everyone."
Here we fucking go. I knew it. Agnes couldn't help, but take a large swig of her beer.
"Our family is growing and changing again already. Or I should say has the potential to grow and change a lot."
Is she announcing her pregnancy prematurely? You're never supposed to do that in case something happens. Just get me out of here... holy shit.
"Well I might be speaking out of turn. I guess this is really something that Agnes should speak to."
Agnes scrunched her brow at Molly and realized everyone was staring at her. A few people were even holding up their phones taking pictures. Molly didn't continue so Agnes shook her head doubtfully and suspiciously at her before turning to look at everyone still in the living room.
"Well, don't look at me. I'm not pregnant." She said bluntly, but their eyes remained hopeful. Agnes was at a loss for words. She didn't know what was going on so she opened her mouth to speak and then just tried to close it again, but it remained slightly ajar with her confusion. After a few seconds of just staring at the people in front of her, Collin stuck his hand in the air and did a twirling motion with his index finger. She was taken aback for a moment, but took his hint and started to turn.
Behind her James was on one knee with a ring in his hand and a crooked smile on his face.
"Agnes, I have a question."