Skylar and Kaden were so used to sitting on the outdoor table that the other students would physically get up and move when they saw them approaching. Oddly enough, it felt like she was some celebrity with a fan cult. Before she was associated with Kaden, when she had long ago claimed that table, nobody blinked an eye if they took her spot. And she never had the guts to kick them out, so she let them have her spot before sitting alone on the grass. But things were different now. And she was dreading the day that everything would go back to normal.
Kaden had already texted Thomas to meet them outside. They were busy working on their English homework, with Skylar quizzing Kaden on Shakespeare quotes for their upcoming quiz, when Kaden nudged her knee with his own. "Don't look. He's coming."
Of course, she now had to look. A quick eye dart just to confirm. And there he was. The same Thomas Saunders from earlier, otherwise known in her diary as boy-from-the-party, strolling their way. "Hey." His voice was slightly higher pitched than the average teen boy. "Did you call me over here?"
Kaden brightened. "Yeah, man. Have a seat. Right there, beside Skylar, yup." Skylar felt weird, having two boys sitting with her. One on either side. A foreign experience. Just then, Kaden's phone beeped. Since she was so close to him, she saw through her peripheral vision that it was nothing more than the next ios update. But Kaden feigned distress, packed up his belongings and said, "I gotta go. Mom just texted me. Family emergency."
Thomas frowned. "But you just-"
"You two bond while I'm gone. Alright, gotta go."
The second Kaden stepped away, it was nothing but pure silence. Pure silence and chirping birds and the sound of Thomas' black converse tapping against the pavement. "So." She blew out a laugh.
"So."
Skylar flashbacked to the pep talk that Kaden drilled into her head just five minutes prior: "Be confident. He's not better than you. So don't act like it."
Right after, she blurted out, "You're really wearing all black in this twenty-five degree weather?" God. That was rude. Why was she being so rude? Although, if she was truthfully giving this new 'confident' thing a trial, she should attempt at speaking her mind sans overthinking. And truth be told, she really was wondering that. His black pants and oversized black hoodie made her sweat just by looking at him.
"You're wearing a cardigan. Are you really one to judge?"
Damn. Glancing down, she saw he was right. "Sorry" she blurted out again. "I- that was rude. I shouldn't have commented on what you were wearing. I just didn't know what else to say and-" Deep breath in, deep breath out. So much for confidence.
Thomas, thank the gods, didn't seem offended in the slightest. "For what it's worth, I like your cardigan. And the shirt underneath. What does it say?" He tilted his head. "Is that a Shakespeare quote printed on there?"
She nodded, sheepish. "I know. I'm a loser."
"No, no, hey, English is my favorite subject too."
Skylar squirmed. "Wait, really?"
He nodded. "I'd rather take advanced calculus than poetry, but I always loved reading. The idea of analyzing literature and writing essays on the themes was just always ten times easier for me than finding x. You get what I'm saying?"
"Yes! I'm not good at black and white answers. I'd rather dissect the information and formulate my own response."
"Yeah, see, you're the first person who gets that. All my other friends are huge STEM geeks, so they're just obsessed with finding the one perfect solution."
"Your friends?"
Thomas' lips twitched. "Yeah, some of the other guys on the lacrosse team. I know it's what you'd least expect about them, like, ha ha, they're actually good at school, surprise surprise, but they're some of the smartest people I know. Truly."
"That's really cool." She suddenly remembered Kaden's next piece of advice. The one that was apparently crucial: talk to him about her relationship problems. At first, Skylar didn't get the point of this. She thought that gossiping about Kaden would make her seem like an unloyal, bad girlfriend, but he explained that there's no better bondage than mutual dislike. "Hey-" she started, wringing together her hands, "is it alright if I ask you some advice on Kaden? Only because you told me yourself that you've been friends for so long. I trust your opinion."
Thomas inched forward on his seat. "Okay. What's up?"
"I'm...I- uh, I-" Her brain randomly shut off, and so she said the first thing she could think of: "I think Kaden might be cheating on me."
"What?" He practically leaped out of his seat.
"Yeah. I, erm, I witnessed him and Summer talking very...intimately.... in the halls. After asking him about it, he seemed very defensive."
Thomas rapidly shook his head. "I didn't wanna say this, Skylar, but I told you so. Guys like Kaden aren't meant for girls like you."
"Uh-huh. So... what should I do?" Her fingers were shaking. Great. It seemed that every time she was caught in a lie, it always had to do with Kaden, and the end result always made him look like a dirty scumbag.
"Break up with him. You don't wanna stay with a guy who doesn't even have the balls to tell you himself, do you?" Thomas' voice was accusatory, like somehow, it was Skylar's fault that their fake relationship was crumbling.
"Of course not. I just-"
"What? What's wrong?"
"I'm scared."
"Scared to confront him?"
"Um. Sure." This whole catastrophe was just twisting and turning into a never ending web of lies. And she couldn't seem to stop it.
"Want me to do it?"
"Oh, um, no actually I don't, that's okay-"
"Brooks. C'mere. I need to have a word with you." Wait. What? Sure enough, there was Kaden, walking purposefully back towards them. He wore a prideful smug, as if confident that he played a successful matchmaker. "S'up, Saunders?" he hollered. His black bag was strung over one shoulder, just like always.
Thomas, like some disapproving school teacher, wiggled his finger and jerked his head to the side, indicating for him to follow. The two walked off to the side, but not far enough that Skylar couldn't eavesdrop. It was a hushed but civil conversation, like Thomas was playing the role of teacher and was scolding Kaden for cheating on a math test.
"-the fucking matter with you?"
"The hell are you talking about?"
"Skylar told me the truth."
"Oh, did she now?" Skylar rolled her eyes, and even though Kaden's back was turned towards her, she vividly pictured him seductively wiggling his eyebrows.
"How could you do this to her?"
"Who?"
"Skylar, you dimwit!"
"Wait, what are we talking about?" Uh-oh.
Thomas lowered his voice. "You just got a new girlfriend, and then you sneak off with Summer behind her back? God. At this point, I can't even defend you anymore."
"Huh?" And then Kaden's whole body stiffens. His feet slowly pivot, until he's facing Skylar again. His eyes pierce her way, sending a non-verbal message that's spelled out crystal clear. She was sure to get a lecture later. "Is that what she told you when I was gone? Hm."
Skylar ducked her head, her wrist hovering above her notebook, pretending to scribble important business. Well, now it was up to Kaden whether or not he'd like to blow their cover. If he confessed the truth, then Thomas would know that Skylar is a desperate liar. And if he gave in, then he'd risk news getting out that he was back together with Summer. Not to mention that his long time friend would lose all respect for him.
"So, hypothetically, if I wasn't dating Skylar anymore, what would you do about it?"
Out of all the possible responses, she least expected this to come out of Kaden's mouth. Smart move, Kaden, smart move.
Thomas, as expected, was caught off guard. There was a clear flusteredness to his tone. "Why is that even a question?"
"Well, I'm just wondering why you care so much," Kaden scoffed. "Clearly, you have some emotional attachment to my girlfriend if you're threatening me like this."
"I'm doing what any decent human being would do."
"Most people would keep their mouths shut. You know, have their friend's backs?"
"So you admit it then! You're cheating on Skylar?"
"The real question is: do you have a crush on my girlfriend, Saunders?" Kaden tsked. "That's kinda weird, dude. At least wait until I break up with her before you make your move, kay'?"
Thomas was watching them both like they were growing two heads. Then, he walked away in a fit, throwing both hands up in the air.
Kaden, on the other hand, was ready to yell at her. She could tell by the clench of his jaw. "What the hell was that?!" He remained standing, hovering over her hunched figure. "Christ Sky, I told you to ask him for relationship advice, and now you go telling people I'm a two-timing bastard?"
"I'm sorry. It slipped out-"
"Slipped out? Do you know what'll happen if Summer finds out about this? She'll think I wanna get back together with her! She won't leave me alone! I'm gonna have to hide my face everyday just to avoid her!"
"I'm sorry."
"How could you have said something so stupid?!"
"Sorry, I-" Her voice caught at the end, and it was hard to miss the waver.
He was breathing hard, face flushed pink from anger, but he cut himself short when hearing her voice crack. "Shit. Hey, I'm sorry." Kaden straddled himself on the bench to face her, lightly shaking her shoulder. "That was out of hand. I shouldn't have yelled. I'm sorry, babe, did I scare you?"
The gentle use of babe only made her more upset. She bit down on her gums, knowing that one word from her lips would send her into a crying fit. And she'd rather die before letting someone else see her ugly cry. Least of all Kaden Brooks.
"I was just scared that he'd go on and blab to everyone." He sighed. "Thomas and I stopped being friends a long time ago. We're still cool, like, we'll sit at the same table and everything, but there's this weird unspoken tension between us. We can't be alone in the same room anymore."
Skylar lifted her head a little, her expression silently asking 'why?'
"There was this incident." He stared down at the ground, eyes hardening. "I-" He cleared his throat before trying again. "In grade ten, I made the senior lacrosse team. I was one of the only juniors to do so. But Thomas played too, and he was pretty good. He got in, but the seniors wanted to play a hazing trick on him. I guess I got... I don't know, jealous? It was stupid, I'm not afraid to admit that, but my dumbass sixteen year-old-self thought that it'd be fun. We dared him to take three shots of vodka out of someone's shoe. Someone ended up posting it, and because it was underaged drinking on school property, Saunders got the butt end of the deal. A week's suspension, which goes on his permanent record, and he got kicked out of the senior team. His parents grounded him for months afterwards. He missed out on alot, all because of some dumb dare." Kaden blew out hard air. "I don't blame him for holding this resentment against me. I'd do it, too. But what just happened back there? It's a no brainer that he was using your love-life as an excuse to tell me off. He probably had a lot of pent up exhaustion he needed to vent out."
Skylar stared dumbfounded at him. She figured he wasn't perfect. Nobody was perfect- but certain people, those like Kaden Brooks, were just better at hiding their flaws. His persona was a portrait on display. But she was discovering more things about him, spending more time with him and seeing how far he differed from the Kaden Brooks of Lincoln High. When they were together, he was just Kaden. The chinks in his armor were showing. She wondered if he would hang around long enough for her to see them all. "That was...cruel."
Kaden laughed, but no humour was behind it. "Yeah. Tell me about it."
"I wouldn't forgive you for that. Ever."
"I wouldn't either."
"Thomas is justified in hating you."
"Yeah. Okay. I think we already established that." He tugged on her hair. "I'm sorry, too, OK? I won't raise my voice again, you can count on that." When she didn't respond right away, he leaned in close, tilting his head almost like he was gonna kiss her. But his face was still inches apart. "OK?" he repeated.
Skylar gave the slightest head nod.
"No tears please." He glucked her chin with his thumb. "Crying girls are my weakness."
"I wasn't mad at you. Just so you know." She sniffled. "I thought you were mad at me. I dislike confrontation. I hate knowing that I've made someone else upset."
"I wasn't mad. Well, OK fine, maybe just a little. But not anymore. Promise."
"OK."
"OK."
Skylar glanced over his shoulder, at the pair of students tossing around a frisbee. "I guess we can scratch out Thomas as a target, right?"
"What? No. This plan is still a-go. Actually, it's even stronger than before."
She huffed out a laugh. "I'm not going to let people think you're a cheat. That's not fair to you. I'll find Thomas tomorrow and let him know the truth."
"Don't worry about that." He snatched the pen out of her hand, twirling it effortlessly between his fingers. "I couldn't give two shits about what he thinks of me. The past is the past. Believe it or not, we have the upper hand in this situation. This way, if we go out in the future, I can still have you by my side, me serving you as a wingman. But, if we're not hanging around each other all the time, it won't be suspicious since Thomas believes we're having boyfriend/girlfriend problems."
"I don't understand."
Absently, he reached out and began braiding her hair while talking. The same two strands were twisted around and around. Hardly a braid, really. "Say we go to a school dance together. You can still go out and mingle with Thomas, have your romantic conversation and whatnot. And when you need some extra pointers, or some bonus advice, I'll be right there with you."
"Ooh."
"For someone so smart, you can be real slow sometimes" he teased. Kaden finished the braid. She reached out to unbrush the messy locks with her fingers, but he beat her to the task. Tingles shot up around her scalp and her shoulders, the places where his touch lingered.
The intercom crackled to life just then. Stray students wandering the field slowed their steps to listen. "Stuuuudents, just a reminder to get your tickets for Lincoln High's first ever football game this upcoming Friday. Tickets are sold for only five bucks a piece, and all proceeds will be made to the Kids Hope Foundation. Get your tickets now at the front foyer. Hurry, before they sell out!"
At the end, Kaden lit up like the fourth of July. "Thomas is a sucker for football. Lucky for you, I happen to know exactly where he sits. We're going."
Skylar, in her three years at Lincoln High, had never been to a football game before. She didn't see the point- the rules of the game were too complicated to understand, and if she went solo to a game, it would only inflate her reputation as the school loner. There were some milestone events in high school that she was more than fine with leaving unchecked. If there was a bucketlist of things to do as a teenager, Skylar would've left most of them undone anyways.
"This Friday?" She racked her brain for an excuse. "I don't know...I might be busy, running the store and everything."
"Stop lying to me. We're going." Kaden lifted his hand towards her hair again, but she smacked it away.
"I'm not paying five dollars for some sport that I'm not even invested in."
"Baby, you're my fake girlfriend. You really think I'd let you pay?" He tsked her, reaching to play with her hair yet again. And yet again, she swatted it away.
"You need to stop calling me that."
"Baby?" he asked incredulously. "You don't like that?"
"It's weird. You're not really my boyfriend. If we're alone, you can just call me by my name."
"Yeah, but it makes you blush. And I like seeing your cheeks turn red."
The bell rang just then, and because they were going to English together, she let Kaden hold her books. He offered to hold her bag too, but that's where she crossed the line. She tried to quicken her steps, but with them holding hands, Kaden tugged her back. "What's the rush?" he asked.
"I don't like to be late."
"The bell just rang like, less than a minute ago! We're not gonna be late."
"Well, I just like to be one of the first ones there, OK? It gives me time to take out my things and write down the date in my notes-"
"You're such a dork, Lin. Remind me why we're dating again."
They crossed the threshold hand in hand, and despite the fact that they've been doing this everyday for weeks now, the stares haven't stopped. If anything, they've only prolonged. Even Ms. Singh had to rub her eyes a few times, as if trying to awaken herself from some trance.
At the start of class, they were given back their pop quizzes. Unfortunately, these pop quizzes counted towards their grades. Ms. Singh liked to say that "if you paid attention everyday, then you'd have nothing to worry about." She wasn't an easy marker, either, but Skylar studied her ass off everyday. When her paper was returned with a fat "100" in bolded red, she wasn't surprised. Kaden, however, didn't share her joyous reaction. Skylar knew it must've been bad when the teacher handed it back folded inwards. Kaden crumpled the sheet and shoved it into his bags almost instantly, but Skylar still caught a glimpse of the number: 66. At least he didn't fail.
She could tell that he wasn't in the best mood, so she didn't bring it up. And even though it wasn't her own 66, she couldn't help the burden that it brought upon. There was this itching desire to help Kaden.
Ironic how over a month ago, she couldn't have cared less about Kaden's well-being. But now, she was going to bed fretting over his grades. It was... it was unnatural. She wasn't used to this. She finally made a genuine friend in her life, and it came with attached strings and expectations and emotional responsibilities. While it was easy to be alone all the time, she knew deep down that she much preferred all the side effects and consequences that came along with friendships. She'd take all those anyday over being alone.
Skylar wasn't great at expressing her feelings. But everyday, she wrote in her journal how grateful she was for a new friend. Before he came into her life, her life was a blank canvas. But each nickname he gave her, every place he took her, these new experiences shaped her life into something more than just existence. The canvas was adding more colors and patterns everyday. And for that, she knew she wouldn't die with a blank page forever. And she had Kaden to thank for that.