I held his hand. His sickness is part of my karma. He is unable to live a normal life because of me.
"Laine." I turned to him, who is now awake.
"Hi."
"Hi."
"I'm here, I won't leave you." I promised. I think he was the one who told me this before.
'My Laine.' he whispered in our mindlink and he smiled before closing his eyes again and continuing his sleep. His expression is more at ease.
"That is incredible." I turned to Dela who just got back. "I have heard of it but I haven't witnessed it first hand."
"What?"
"You can pass your lifeforce."
I can what...?
The days passed by and I am certain they were curious about the King's disappearance. He is doing well but I am not allowing him to handle any work. Dela went back to their kingdom seeing how he was doing. But both of us know what is happening.
"We still can't find any hard evidence against the council." Eros sighed, slumping on the chair.
"They are very careful. We tried to catch them in the act several times but it was no use."
"Hey, I told you to stop thinking about it." I reminded him for the nth time. I grabbed a pillow and threw it at him.
"Hey!" He laughed. He threw it back, I dodged, causing it to hit the one standing behind me, Duke.
"Stop this childishness." He said putting away the pillow. He arrived a few days ago, he said he wanted to investigate the Southern Coven too and their connection with the council.
"It's just like the old days, eh?" Eros commented. Old days?
"The four of us are having a secret meeting in this once shabby cabin." It was about 15 years ago.
"It was a good thing that you two found it." Duke and Valen were always quarelling before and I don't know how they ended up in this place. Despite being a vampire guardian, Duke can still shift to his wolf form. Maybe they were arguing about who is faster. Ugh.
*Knock.Knock*
There is contentment in simple things. A small peace in this battle. Yet, for all I know, it doesn't last.
"Please excuse my intrusion, your visitor is here." The guard told Duke.
"Let him in."
I wasn't looking but I think... I stopped breathing. This presence...
"I would like to introduce our ally." I turned to confirm and all I ever want was to turn to dust. "So, you've come, Alpha Aiden." Valen addressed the visitor. Wait, Valen knows? Am I the only one in the dark.
I immediately eyed at the King. 'What the hell?!'
'I promise there's a very good reason.' He answered in our link.
I calmed myself. There must be a good reason. There must be! He knows very well how this will end up if there's none.
"I suppose we do not need any introduction." He started as we sat around a table. How did it end up like this?
"No but I need an explanation." I eyed at the trio. First Valen kind'a dislike Duke, Duke hates Aiden, Aiden basically is gonna dethrone Valen. And for the most part I have three of my previous mates here! So what now?
"I know. We should have told you." Valen said. "It was so sudden and with the recent events..." he paused. Right, he knows about the rejection.
I turned to Duke. 'You didn't tell him about the curse, did you?' I said through the mindlink.
'It's not my place to tell.' Good. 'He is here in a professional capacity otherwise, I will gladly kill him.'
"Okay." Valen clapped his hand to get our attention. "Let's start first with our business. Aiden did you bring it?"
"As promised," he handed out and envelope. "Those are the proofs of illegal transactions of the council along with their agreement with some of the rogue vampires."
"Those rogue vampires are what they call the southern coven huh? This means one thing, they want a war." Duke kept on inspecting the documents.
"If they want a war that means they have an army ready." Is this why Aiden wants an army? To be ready in a time like this?
Valen is still weak and he knows it. The council also does. I have only transferred enough lifeforce for him to get back on his feet. I still have some left but if we go to war I won't be able to stay in the offense.
"Right, we have to prevent it before it happens."
"We don't have enough time." Aiden finally spoke. "They are planning to start their take over and they will use your absence."
"This is my fault. I was too easy on them. I refused their wish to find a queen and now I have gone sick and weak."
It is also my fault. If I did not let the trauma of battles affect me, he wouldn't need to reject me.
Duke also sighed probably thinking about it, too.
"It's everyone's fault." The three of us turned to Aiden. "We have no time to regret everything right now."
"You're right. Let's plan our move." We continued planning until it was late at night.
I went outside to take a breather. What can I do? Fate is really twisted.
*Cough*
I put my hand on my mouth. My chest feels heavy and it is more difficult to move. I turned to my hand tainted with blood. It looks like my time is ending sooner rather than later. I don't have time for a war. I watched as my blood dissipated into thin air.
I sat on the ground watching the stars, reminded of what Dela said about turning to dust. From dust we came, to dust we return. Such a catchy phrase to end this.
"If you want to talk, talk now." I did not have to look to know it is Aiden standing behind me.
"You are the guardian." So, they did not tell him in advance.
"What if I am? Doesn't change anything."
"I don't understand."
"You don't need to, I don't expect everyone to understand."
"No." He walked beside me. "What I did to you, you should have..." he paused.
"Should have prevented you? punished you?" I can't help but smile.
"We don't have time to regret." I repeated what he said. "You're still bound to reject me knowing it or not."
I turned towards him. He will just be a distant memory and so will I. His fist clenched. "Guardian or not, we are nothing against the law of life. A curse will always find its way."
"A curse?"
I did not mind his question. There is no point on telling him now.
"I'm sorry I am not the guardian you expected me to be. I cannot give you answers. I cannot control even the council."
"No. You fought for peace. You are the reason why there are less fighting, why we have packs to call home."
"Stop patronizing me, okay?!" I yelled standing up.
"Stop blaming yourself!" He also did. "The King told me."
"What?" Valen does not know the full curse but I did not account for him to tell the other.
"Your hands were visibly shaking when you are near the children. The wars left you afraid. The fear to hurt anyone. The fear to have no purpose. I am not blind." He does not know of the curse. But then...
"And I am also not blind. It was... is my responsibility to protect them... you. No matter..." My mind flashed his rejection, their rejections, my past before I was a guardian. The fate I was entangled into. And I... hate it. "I can't turn back the clock, I can't change the past, What do you want me to do? don't feel?"
"No. What I mean to say is that you can stop here. We can fight for ourselves. You don't have to undergo ruin anymore. Forgive yourself."
Forgive? I... I turned to my hands. For years I have been suppressing this anger... this remorse... How could I forgive myself?
His warm hand caressed my cheek.
"You don't have to fight anymore. Let go." His voice echoed a thousand times for that one second. Let go? Let go of those people who died because of I can't protect them? Let go because I was dismissive and did not bother to try just one more time? Let go?... How? I don't know... And I don't know how but one by one my tears flow. My heart wept along with my soul. The anger turned to grief to sadness...
He encased me in his arms. Patting my back like a baby as I cry my heart out.
To let go. That was the last thing I thought of, before everything went black.