I woke to my mother and sister kissing my forehead. I notice tears in their eyes and realize they were looking at Kelly next to me. She was hugged to my right arm with our hands laced between us.
Tears fill my eyes and choke in a whisper, "I wanted her to have a wedding better than the one I had with Jessica and I ruined it by ending up in here."
"You can still give her that sweetheart," my mother chokes in a soothing whisper and I look at her as tears roll down my cheeks. "You still have that beautiful beach wedding you planned for next year. You planned this small gathering because she didn't want to wait after what happened with Katie."
"There isn't going to be a wedding next year if I'm not there to participate," I choke quietly and she looks at me with hurt eyes. "I almost died twice in the last six weeks. Whose to say that something doesn't happen in the next year. I don't even know if I'll see my twins born if I continue with the job I have."
"You love being a cop," my mother chokes quietly as tears roll down her cheeks.
"What good is it to continue being a cop if every day there's a chance I don't come home to my wife," I ask in a scared whisper. "I almost died on our wedding night from a shard of bullet I took saving Jamie six years ago."
"What will you do for a job? You have a pregnant wife to worry about Jennifer," my mother chokes quietly.
"I'll be going for my detective's exam, as planned and before I'm able to go back on duty. I don't want to be a patrol officer anymore. If I fail, I'll think of something else," I choke quietly and she nods lightly.
Kelly takes in a hissing breath, clamping down on my hand. Her breaths become heavy. "Something is wrong," she hisses through clenched teeth.
"Caroline, calmly go get a doctor," my mother says in a soothing tone and walks over to rub Kelly's stomach. "Breathe Kelly."
She shutters a calming breath and loosened her grip on my hand slightly. I meet eyes with my mother and together we start singing the lullaby. As if flipping a switch, her breaths calmed down and her grip on my hand loosened completely.
Her doctor walks in a few minutes later with a portable ultrasound machine. She saw that she was calm and calmly approached the bed. "I brought the portable to see what's going on without taking you from Jennifer. She's currently got you calmed down and I don't want any extra stress for the twins than they were last night," she says in a calm whisper.
"Can you bring a fetal monitor in here," Kelly asks in a calm whisper.
"Let's see what activity we have going first and go from there okay," Bryce says softly and Kelly nods lightly. Bryce turns to my mother and asks softly, "Can you help her move to her back?"
My mother carefully helps her to her back and we continue singing the lullaby. I bring her hand up and kiss her wedding bands. Bryce exposes Kelly's stomach and moments later waves the wand over her stomach.
Bryce points to the monitor and says, "Their umbilical cords are tangled, probably due to their activity last night while you were under stress about Jennifer."
Kelly squeezes my hand again, but the twins weren't moving on the monitor. "Can you please check to see if she's having contractions or if she's dilating," I choke quietly as tears roll down my cheeks.
"Sweetheart she's only twenty-five weeks pregnant," my mother says quietly.
"It's been fifteen minutes since she last clamped my hand. The last person who did this was in labor and died giving birth to a child that wasn't mine," I choke quietly, scared. "I'm not taking chances with my wife and twins after these last few weeks and especially since I almost died on our wedding night."
"Can everyone please leave," Kelly asks in a choked whisper, letting out a shaky breath. "Bryce, don't let me lose my babies."
"Shhh," Bryce says softly stroking her hair. "Your babies are going to be fine. They need their mommy to calm down."
"Can we get another bed in here for her, please," I ask in a soothing whisper.
"Do it," Joyce says in sympathy.
"Thank you," Kelly chokes with relief. "Can you send in Claire?"
Joyce nods as she and Bryce leave the room. Moments later Kelly's parents and grandparents walk in. Her father had a scowling look on his face and she chokes quietly, "If you're in here to cause stress, get out. I might be going in premature labor and Jennifer hasn't had her medication yet."
Valerie jabs her elbow in Victor's side and he walks out. "He didn't sleep well, worried about the two of you," Valerie says softly and Kelly nods lightly. "Everyone is here if you're up to seeing them."
"I need to stop these contractions first," she hisses as she clamps down on my hand again.
"They're still fifteen minutes apart," I say quietly and start humming the lullaby.
She lets out a calming breath and her family was surprised by how quickly she was calming down. Her grandmother wishes us to feel better and they leave so we could have a quiet, calm room. Claire was walking in as they left with my medication and a prenatal vitamin for Kelly. She helps me take my medication as another bed was brought in for Kelly along with a fetal monitor.
Claire helps Kelly move to her own bed and places the fetal monitors on her stomach. She helps her get comfortable with a pillow under her knees. She goes to leave, but Kelly grabs her hand. "Please don't go. You're the only person other than Jennifer that calms them down," she chokes in a breathy whisper.
Claire looks at me and tears fill my eyes. "Please, Claire. We need to stop her from going into labor. She's already had three contractions," I choke in a scared whisper.
She climbs in the spare space next to Kelly and Kelly lets out a calming breath. Claire massages her temples and Kelly hums in content, closing her eyes. Bryce walks in with Joyce and they notice she was in the bed next to me with Claire. Joyce was about to say something, but I shook my head, giving her a pleading look.
Another doctor walks in, looking me over and checks my vitals. "How are you feeling," she asks softly as she changes the bandages on my chest.
"I'm fine, just worried about my wife going into premature labor," I choke quietly. I look at the bullet shard on the table next to me and ask, "How bad was it?"
"A knick in your pulmonary artery, but other than that everything was fine. You're a lucky woman," the doctor says softly and looks at Kelly. "She asked for me personally. She's helped me with more than one surgery, the least I could do was save you for her sake."
"Thank you," I choke quietly and look over at Kelly. Tears roll down my cheeks and choke in a whisper, "She wouldn't be going through this if it weren't for that damn bullet fragment."
"She said you got it in Iraq, taking four bullets for Jamie. I'm surprised you've lived this long with it," she says quietly.
"Devon," Kelly says quietly and the doctor looks at her. "I understand why she feels responsible. How is the healing process?"
"She's healed more than expected," Devon says softly, taping a new bandage in place. "I know you're currently under observation for the twins, but once you're able to go home, she can too. No strenuous activity for six weeks, such as sex, running, climbing stairs or anything that involves increasing your heart rate. I don't want to aggravate the stitches on your artery."
"What about my anxiety, how do I prevent an attack," I ask quietly.
"Take your medication on time and avoid anything that sets off your anxiety," she says quietly.
I couldn't help but laugh and Kelly laughs with me. "So pretty much my family," Kelly says with a smile. "My family has set off her anxiety more than anything since we met."
"Being in the hospital doesn't help either," I say in a laugh. "It triggers both my anxiety and PTSD."
I stop laughing as tears fill my eyes. I still have nightmares about Katie and how close she was getting away from me to go after Kelly. I haven't told anyone. I look at the time and then at Kelly. "It's been almost a half hour since your last contraction, unless you had one being over there," I say quietly.
"No, pain is gone too," she chokes with relief.
"I'd like to keep you through lunch, just to be sure. Do you guys have someone who can assist both of you that doesn't cause either of you stress," Joyce says softly.
"Claire," Kelly and I choke in unison.
Kelly and I fell asleep before lunch, thankful that the contractions stopped once we were left alone by our family. Joyce had okayed Claire as our live in nurse until I was recovered from surgery. I was keeping the bullet fragment and figuring out a way to make it into something for Kelly.
I woke to someone rubbing something on my chest. "Sorry," Kelly chokes quietly, taking her hand away. Tears roll down her cheeks and says in a choked whisper, "You looked like you were in pain and I wanted..."
"It was feeling good until you stopped," I say softly and she shutters a calming breath. She goes back to what she was doing and I hum a relieved sigh. "What is that stuff?"
"Its a numbing ointment to help with the pain and keep your muscles relaxed after open heart surgery," she chokes quietly, unable to meet my eye contact. "Devon is sending some home with us."
"Kelly, you should be resting," Claire says in a soothing tone as she enters the room.
"I'm fine," she chokes in a whisper. "You know taking care of patients keeps me calm. Jennifer just happens to be my wife."
Claire nods lightly, letting her be. "I'm here to let you know that your family wish to see you before going home, but they'll understand if you say no."
"I almost went into premature with our family visiting. We'll call them when we're ready," she chokes quietly and Claire nods with understanding.
She gives Kelly's back a comforting rub before leaving the room again. Kelly finishes with the ointment and meets my eyes. "Feel anything," she asks with tears in her eyes.
"Feels easier to breathe without the pain, thank you," I say softly and she lets out a relieved breath. I take her hand and whisper softly, "Kiss me."
"What if I want more," she asks in a choked whisper, lower lip quivering.
"I got you something, I was going to use it last night and it'll be my replacement until I can take care of your needs," I say in a seductive whisper and she shudders next to me.
I bring my hand between her legs and her breaths hitch. I could feel she was wet through her scrubs I rub my finger over the cloth over her opening. Her breaths quicken and one hand clamps my thigh. "Jennifer," she chokes in a breathy whisper.
My heart rate was slowly increasing and she shakes her head as tears rapidly roll down her cheeks. Tears roll down my cheeks as she moves away from my bed. I can't even please my pregnant wife without my heart rate increasing to damage the repair on my artery.
Claire walks in with Joyce, Bryce and Devon and all four of them noticed we were upset, but don't bother asking. "Can we leave so I can stop hearing the sound of my heart rate increasing with just talking with my wife," I ask in a choked whisper and let out a calming breath. "Seems like we'll have to avoid each other a few weeks."
"Jennifer," Kelly chokes quietly and I look at her. "Just until we go to bed. You have nightmares about Iraq when you sleep alone."
I let out a relieved sigh and relax against the pillows. The four women in the room were amazed at how we were able to calm each other down. They were all in here this morning while I was singing the lullaby and they just witnessed her calm me down.
"Not recently, I have nightmares about recent events. I just haven't told you because you have them too," I choke quietly and tears fill her eyes, knowing exactly what I was talking about.
She flashes a small smile and I knew she understood why I didn't say anything. The four women in this room knew exactly what I was talking about and thankfully they don't mention it. She comes over and kisses my forehead, taking my hand. "Are you ready to go home," Joyce asks in sympathy for us and we nod lightly.
Devon leaves us some ointment and leaves with Joyce. Bryce takes another look at the twins while Claire helps me change into my clothes my mother brought. A pair of my comfy shorts and a loose button down tshirt.
There wasn't a pair of boxers and I wasn't wearing any under the gown. "Thanks mom, guess I go commando," I say quietly as I feel my cheeks grow hot with a blush.
Claire blushes, avoiding my eye contact. "Are you comfortable with me helping you get dressed," she asks shyly.
"I don't have much of a choice," I murmur quietly. "I'm not allowed to move my arms if I can help it, to avoid pulling the stitches in my chest."
"I'll do my best not to expose you while you still have the gown on," she says quietly, helping me sit up.
She helps me swing my legs over the edge of the bed, slipping my legs into my shorts. I slide off the edge of the bed and she carefully pulls up my shorts allowing the gown to tuck into the waistband. I let out a relieved breath and she meets my eyes.
"Are you okay with me helping with your shirt? You're not able to wear a bra with the stitches," Claire says quietly.
"They look more like a man's pecks than woman's breasts," I say with a light smile. "I don't mind, thank you for asking."
She nods lightly and carefully removes the gown before carefully helping me into my shirt. She carefully fastens the buttons over my chest, working her way down. Joyce and Devon return with a couple of wheelchairs. "It's only for the walk out," Devon says softly, noticing the look on my face. "You said you couldn't talk with..."
"It was excitement that increased my heart rate, I'll walk slow," I choke quietly as Claire finishes with my buttons and Kelly steps in front of me with a concerned look in her eyes. "I will not be walked out in a wheelchair when I'm perfectly capable of walking myself."
"I'm not asking as your wife or as your doctor. I'm asking on behalf of our twins, just this once. Please," she asks in a choked whisper as tears roll down her cheeks. She places my hands on her stomach and asks, "Please Jen?"
I feel them kick at my hands and nod lightly. She lets out a relieved breath and I kiss her forehead. I sit in the wheelchair next to me and take her hand as she walks away from me. She looks down at me and I kiss her wedding bands. She kisses my temple and goes to sit in the other wheelchair.
We're wheeled out passed our family and out to my car that was waiting with Caroline. Kelly must have asked her to drive us home after I fell asleep. I look at Kelly and she gives me a light smile.
"I asked her aside from Claire to stay and help us, given she was the only one who didn't stress us out," she says softly and I nod.
"I'll ride in the back, I'm not wearing a seatbelt across my chest," I say quietly and Caroline opens the back door for me before helping Claire help me out of the chair. "Thank you."
I'm able to slide in on my own and Kelly rides in back with me. Claire rides up front with my sister and Caroline heads home. Kelly hugs to my arm as we ride in silence and lets her head rest on my shoulder. "Thank you Caroline," I say quietly.
"What are sisters for," she says with a smile and pulls out of the hospital.
I close my eyes and enjoy the quiet ride home. Kelly traces her finger over the lines in my palm and I let out a content sigh. My fingers twitch with every line she carefully traces. Before I know it, she's kissing my cheek and I open my eyes.
"We're home," she says in a soothing whisper.
I wait for her to climb out and slide out after her. We enter the house and I'm ushered to the guest room downstairs. I let out a defeated sigh as Kelly props pillows for me. "Do I really need to lay in bed? Can I recline our chair," I ask in a pleading whisper.
"You did the wheelchair for me, it wouldn't be fair if you couldn't relax in our chair," she says with understanding.
"Thank you," I choke with relief.