Jisoo's first memory of someone telling her they love her was when she was three. It was her first day of kindergarten, she remembered that she was crying all morning because she didn't want to leave her house and she continued to cry throughout the whole car ride. When she finally reached her kindergarten, she held onto her mom's hand just a bit tighter, hoping that she wouldn't have to leave.
Jisoo remembered how she eventually relented, slowly loosening her grip on her mom's hand. She remembered her mom's soft "I love you, my Jisoo. Have fun today. You'll do great," before she took cautious steps forward, glancing back once in a while to see her mom standing there, a small smile on her face. When she reached the entrance and was met with a friendly Ms. Lee, she realized that maybe kindergarten wouldn't be that bad after all. She gave her mom one last wave, a grin now on her face.
Her parents never told her they loved her after that. It wasn't that they didn't—Jisoo knew that they do—they were just not the type who often show affection. People often see her family as cold and distant, and in some cases Jisoo figured they were. Their conversations on the dinner table were brief and short, the rest of dinner mostly spent in silence. They didn't hug, preferring pats on the back instead. When Jisoo got accepted into a prestigious university, her parents gave her keys to a penthouse in the center of Seoul. Jisoo knew that it was her parents' way of saying congratulations, and Jisoo definitely didn't mind the floor-to-ceiling windows and the private elevator, she didn't mind that her congratulatory dinner was spent in silence either.
So Jisoo never had much experience with the love that she saw in movies, all the hugs and the'I love you' s and the heart-to-heart conversations. Jisoo thought they were too cliché anyway. Especially the'I love you' s. Some people give proclamations of love too easily and not mean a single thing.
Her best friend, Lisa, loved to laugh every time people misjudged Jisoo to be someone emotionless and cold, when in reality she was just "brought up with zero affection and is terrible at anything related to love and romance and all that jazz," (Lisa's words).
Although Jisoo would say that that was false. Just because she turned awkward whenever someone showed a bit of affection didn't mean that Jisoo sucked at romance. Jisoo had watched enough Nicholas Sparks movies to understand what she had to do when the time came. Flowers. Chocolates. Kissing in the rain. Simple.
("Simple. Yup, definitely. That's obviously why you're still single at the age of thirty."
"Excuse me! I'm not thirty yet!"
"Should I set you up with someone? I'm gonna set you up with someone."
"Lisa, fuck off.")
So maybe Jisoo was almost thirty and still single. So what? Jisoo just never thought of relationships to be that big of a deal. And it definitely wasn't because of how she was as a person "distant and reserved" —or so how Lisa described her to be. Her job as the CEO of her family's company was already taking too much of her time as it is.
Jisoo was leading one of South Korea's finest, and it required back-to-back meetings and her full attention and wow , Jisoo really was going to die alone as a cat lady which was so much worse because she was allergic to cats.
"Your two o'clock is here."
Jisoo turned her gaze towards the door to the sound of her assistant's voice. "Remind me who's my two o'clock again?"
"College student with an interview for a magazine piece."
Jisoo hummed, turning back to her computer to finish her email. "Send them in."
She tried to tidy her desk up as best as she could with all the papers strewn around. There was a framed picture of her in a graduation gown in between her parents, another one of her and Lisa on one of their trips to Paris. She almost had a picture of her and her ex framed too but that only lasted for a week so it definitely didn't deserve a place on her desk.
Jisoo sighed. She didn't know why she was thinking about relationships so much. Sure she was turning thirty next year but that didn't mean it would be the end of the world. Relationships and romance were too much of a hassle anyway. Jisoo was the CEO of a damn KOSPI 200 company. She had way more important things to care about than love.
She internally cursed Lisa for getting into her head.
"Miss Kim? Hi, nice to meet you."
Jisoo's mouth went agape.
"I'm Kim Jennie. Thank you for agreeing to meet with me."
On second thought, maybe Lisa was right. Maybe Jisoo really was destined to be the typical career woman who focused too much on work and never had time for love, especially since she was cold and distant and was really, really downright terrible at romance, because there was no way that her heart freaking skipped a beat because of a kid —well, not a kid, but still. Not because of someone who was still in university.
The moment Kim Jennie smiled, Jisoo knew she was screwed.
—
"Fuck you, Lisa."
"Well, Kim Jisoo, I'm flattered but I'd have to politely decline, since as you know, I'm sort of dating someone and that wouldn't be nice."
Jisoo groaned into her phone. "Not funny. I hate you."
Lisa laughed. "What did I do this time?"
"You planted these stupid, stupid thoughts into my head! I was thinking about being single so much that you made me have a crush on some college gir—"
"I'm gonna stop you right there. How is this my fault?"
"I don't know!" Jisoo exclaimed. "She came into my office with her stupid cute vest and and little notebook in hand and her hair was brown and wavy but not too wavy, it was just perfect the way it falls perfectly down her shoulders and her stupid smile. She was smiling at me, Lisa. At me. Smiling."
"Oookay," Lisa dragged out. "When I said you should find someone I didn't mean a sugar baby."
"Lisa!"
"Sorry! You did say she was a college student earlier."
Jisoo groaned even more. "I know. She doesn't seem that young though."
"You're saying she failed her classes?"
"I didn't say that!"
"Well you were insinuating—"
"Whatever, you're no help," Jisoo stared at her reflection in the bathroom mirror, making sure that she looked fine. Not that she wanted to impress Jennie—she just wanted to look fine to someone who was going to interview her. Yeah, that was it. "I'll talk to you later."
"Going back to your new lover?"
"Shut up," Jisoo unlocked the door and stepped out of the VIP bathroom. "I ran to the bathroom 'cause I freaked out."
Lisa's laugh was so loud that people in the hallways glanced at Jisoo as she passed by. "Real smooth. You're totally good at romance. An expert. The real life Romeo—"
Jisoo hung up and plopped her phone in the pocket of her blazer. She could get through this. She had thousands of meetings with business men who thought they were better than her. She wasn't nervous then, why would she be nervous now?
"Sorry, where were we?" Jisoo said as soon as she entered her office. She took a seat on her desk, Jennie on the other side, still with that damn smile on her face.
"I was just about to tell you that I have always wanted to do a piece about you," Jennie replied.
"About me? " Jisoo squeaked, immediately clearing her throat nervously.
— No, not nervously. Jisoo didn't get nervous. Fuck.
"Yes," Jennie fidgeted with the notepad and pen in her hands, her shoes tapping on the floor slightly. Jisoo realized that Jennie was nervous, and somehow the thought placed a smile on her face.
"So you're a reporter? I think my assistant mentioned you being a college student."
"Yes—well, not quite and yes. I'm not a reporter, I just like to write pieces and submit them to magazines or newspapers. Nothing big," Jennie tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and smiled bashfully. "And your assistant is right about the college part."
"I see," Jisoo nodded. "Taking up journalism in uni?"
Jennie scrunched up her nose. "Isn't this supposed to be me interviewing you?"
Jisoo laughed. "I suppose so."
"I majored in journalism, yes," Jennie answered. "For my undergrad."
"Undergrad?"
"Yeah, I'm currently taking up master's."
Realization dawned on Jisoo's face and she had to look to the side to hide away her smile. "You're not as young as I thought."
It was Jennie's turn to break into a laugh. "How young did you think I was?"
"I don't know," Jisoo shrugged, a coy smile on her face. "Nineteen."
"I am definitely not nineteen years old," Jennie said. Jisoo couldn't tell if what they were doing would be considered flirting.
"I'm sorry," Jisoo shook away the thoughts in her head. "I think we're getting side-tracked here."
"You're right, sorry," Jennie agreed. "Should we jump into it then?"
"Fire away."
—
As soon as Jennie left, Jisoo couldn't concentrate for the rest of the day. She didn't know whether it was because of how stupidly charming Jennie was or because of Jennie's addictive smile —no. It was probably not because of Jennie at all. Jennie, who she barely knew. Jennie with the stars in her eyes, staring at Jisoo as if she adored her to bits and wanted to know every single detail about her, including Jisoo's favourite food.
"Is that a common thing to ask someone you're interviewing?" Jisoo asked Lisa in between bites of her steak.
"What?" Lisa furrowed her brows. "Asking for your favourite food? That does seem pretty random."
"Right?! It was like she was done with all her questions, but she wanted to get to know me further—"
Jisoo's sentence was cut off by Lisa's laughter. "Don't get too cocky now, Kim Jisoo. Just because you have a crush on her doesn't mean she's into you too."
Jisoo rolled her eyes. "I don't have a crush on her. I can admit she's attractive. And funny. And smart. Doesn't mean I have a crush on her."
"Seems like you do," Lisa said, a smirk forming on her lips. "Which is great! Haven't I been telling you to find someone? This is super great."
"I'm not gonna date some kid, Lisa," Jisoo cut into her steak and took a bite. Yup. She wasn't going to date someone who was years younger than her.
"She's twenty-five, I hardly think that's considered a 'kid'."
Jisoo narrowed her eyes at the blonde sitting in front of her. "How do you know she's twenty-five?"
"Google exists," Lisa said simply. "And remember the girl I'm sort-of-seeing-but-not-really?"
"Rose," Jisoo nodded.
"Rosie ," Lisa corrected. "She's your girl's best friend."
Jisoo paused her fork mid-air. "What?"
Lisa hummed. "They're on the way here as we speak."
"What?!" Jisoo repeated, a clang echoing throughout her dining room as her fork fell to her plate.
"I invited them over for drinks."
Jisoo palmed her face and groaned. "I think I miss the part where you invited them over to my place without my acknowledgement ."
"Oh boo-hoo, Chichu," Lisa waved her off. "Stop acting as if I don't live here."
"You don't," Jisoo reminded.
"Your place is my place and all that," Lisa teased.
"Lisa," Jisoo felt like strangling Lisa. Or anything to wipe that grin off her face—
"Excuse me, Miss Kim," a man in a butler uniform interrupted her. "There are guests at the door."
Lisa squeaked and jumped out of her chair. "That's them!"
Jisoo opened her mouth to say something but Lisa was already out of the room before she could utter a word. Damn it.
"Thank you, Tom," Jisoo forced a smile on her face, following after Lisa and sighing when she walked down the staircase to see a tall blonde she'd seen in pictures and none other than Kim Jennie.
"Hello," Jisoo greeted.
"Rosie, this is my grumpy and very single best friend, Jisoo," Lisa pointed at Jisoo and Jisoo slapped Lisa's hand away.
"I'm Jisoo," Jisoo put her hand out, her smile widening when she caught Jennie's eyes. Okay, so maybe she didn't hate Lisa that much.
"I know, wow, it's an honor," Chaeyoung shook Jisoo's hands. "You're incredible."
Jisoo laughs, her cheeks turning red. "I'm not that great, but thank you." She turned to Jennie and gave a little wave. "I don't think introductions are necessary, is it?"
"Hi, Miss Kim," Jennie said. Jisoo hated how addicted she was to her voice despite having just met the girl today.
"Oh no. Jisoo is fine, please."
"Okay then," Jennie grinned and Jisoo swore she could die on the spot. "Jisoo it is."
—
"So, Jisoo," Jennie started. They were seated on one couch, Lisa and Chaeyoung occupying the smaller seater to their left. No one seemed to be paying attention to the movie anymore. Jisoo couldn't even remember what the damn plot of the movie was. Jennie, as it turned out, smelled really good and it was very addicting—and Jisoo was insane. Insane for developing a tiny crush on a college student when she was nearing the big age of thirty.
Jennie looked like she didn't know what to say, settling with, "Nice place."
Jisoo gave a soft laugh. "Thank you? There's more that I haven't shown you actually."
"Yeah?" Jennie sounded like she wanted to have Jisoo show her around.
Jisoo darted her eyes towards her best friend and her 'not-so-date' to see that they had both fallen asleep. Jisoo contemplated whether being alone with Jennie would be something she should be doing or not, and after a moment she decided that there wasn't any reason for her to not want to be alone with Jennie.
So Jisoo stood up and offered a hand out for Jennie to take. "Come on, I'll show you around."
—
Ten minutes into being alone with Jennie and walking around her house—or mansion, as Jennie called it—Jisoo discovered five things about her.
1. Jennie was twenty-five years old. Lisa was right.
2. Jennie had two dogs, Kai and Kuma, and Jisoo could tell how much she loved them with the way Jennie excitedly told the story about how she got them.
3. Jennie was an only child and her parents spoiled her to bits and they supported her in everything she did. Jisoo told her she was jealous—her parents spoiled her too but in materialistic ways and sometimes Jisoo didn't mind getting Dior bags every time they couldn't make it to something important, but sometimes she just wanted her parents to be there for her.
4. Jennie had dreams of working in high fashion, especially Chanel. Jisoo made a mental note to tell her assistant that she would be meeting with whoever was in charge of Chanel in South Korea.
5. Jennie was hilarious and made Jisoo laugh a lot. Jisoo wanted more of her.
Jennie was in the middle of retelling how her day went and Jisoo somehow really wanted to kiss her, which was dumb and stupid, considering how she just met her today.
Jennie got excited over the littlest things, she talked animatedly about how she saw a dog on her way to Jisoo's place that looked a lot like her own and she gushed about how the dog barked excitedly at her. Jisoo found it adorable, despite being confused about how exactly a freaking dog can bark 'excitedly'.
"I'm sorry I talk a lot," Jennie said, tucking her hair behind her ears.
"Don't be," Jisoo bumped their shoulders lightly as they continued their walk around her house. "It's cute."
Jennie playfully rolled her eyes. Jisoo could see the red on the tips of her ears. Adorable. "Where are we again?" Jennie said, changing the subject. "Can we go outside?"
"Sure," Jisoo led them towards the nearest door that leads to her backyard. "The pool is on the other side, this is my flower garden."
"You have a flower garden," Jennie stated.
Jisoo hummed in reply. "I love looking at flowers. They're pretty."
Once they stepped outside, Jisoo felt her teeth chatter, cursing herself for not wearing anything more appropriate for the cold night air. When she was about to ask Jennie if she wanted to head back inside, a cardigan was draped around her shoulders and Jisoo was surrounded with the scent of vanilla.
"Jennie, you don't have to—"
"Take it," Jennie insisted. "You're freezing."
"You're gonna freeze."
Jisoo shook off the black cardigan and was about to place it around Jennie's shoulder but Jennie walked ahead. "I won't," Jennie walked backwards, smiling reassuringly. "I'm wearing a sweater. I can handle it. Don't worry."
Jisoo hesitated for a second before putting on the cardigan. Jisoo hugged herself tighter, it was still cold but also because the cardigan smelled really nice. "Thank you."
"No problem," Jennie replied. She stopped walking and Jisoo would know this if she wasn't so busy looking elsewhere but the girl in front of her.
The moment Jisoo bumped into Jennie, Jennie's hands immediately went to steady her, resting on Jisoo's forearms. Jisoo could feel herself flush, her cheeks getting warm, profusely apologizing because she was usually never this clumsy.
Jennie giggled, her hands were still sending fire to Jisoo's skin, their faces inches apart. "That's okay."
"I should've watched where I was going," Jisoo's face was apologetic. "I'm really sorry."
"It's okay. Really," Jennie was smiling at her. "A lot on your mind today?"
Jisoo studied Jennie's face and nodded. Definitely a lot. She noticed that Jennie had a mole under her left eyebrow.
"Mind sharing?" Jennie asked.
Jisoo immediately stood up straighter and cleared her throat. Jennie dropped her hands, but made no move to step away. "Just- work. Had a lot of meetings today."
Yup. Work. Definitely not because she couldn't get Jennie's brown eyes off her mind.
Jennie narrowed her eyes at her and Jisoo held in her breath. They were really close. It was getting harder to breathe. All Jisoo could think about was that vanilla was about to become her favourite scent.
"You're interesting."
Jisoo raised her eyebrows at that. "I am?"
"Yeah," Jennie nodded. "I saw you at one of your meetings earlier, you know, through the glass wall. You were... I wouldn't say scary, but I was pretty sure one of your employees peed their pants."
Jisoo broke into a laugh. "What?"
"You had that furrow between your brows," Jennie elaborated, raising her hand and hesitantly running a finger across Jisoo's forehead. "And I could hear your voice, even with a glass barrier between us," Jennie chuckled, dropping her hand. "But despite the shouts you were still charismatic and graceful as ever. I could see why people would be so intimidated by you."
"And that's interesting to you?" Jisoo said, her voice barely a whisper. Her heart was hammering wildly in her chest.
"Yeah," Jennie answered, her voice matching Jisoo's whisper. "Because while I was interviewing you and this whole night, you've been acting the opposite and I couldn't figure it out."
"The opposite?"
"You're... awkward," Jennie laughed. "You take charge at the office, your chin held high, you look people straight in the eye when conversing with them. But you're so awkward—you bump into me, you stutter, you can't look me in the eye for more than five seconds."
Damn it. Jennie was smart. Well, Jisoo knew she was smart, but this was... this was Jennie being able to read Jisoo's thoughts and damn it.
Jisoo couldn't even defend herself because it was true. All the things Jennie observed were true and what could Jisoo exactly say to that? That Jisoo acted that way because she was nervous? That being around Jennie made her nervous? Which was baffling because Jisoo had done speeches in front of thousands of people without tripping over her word once, yet one night with Jennie and Jisoo's vocabulary went out the window.
"I'm sorry- sorry if that was overstepping," Jennie said, finally stepping backwards. "I was just stating what I saw."
Jennie looked really beautiful under the moonlight. Her eyes casted downwards, her hands fidgety, as if she was doubting herself about why she said all that. Jennie looked terrified, perhaps about what Jisoo would say next. If Jisoo was her, she would be too. Jennie terrified her.
Despite the million things that were running through her mind, one thought stood out and—Jennie looked really beautiful under the moonlight. Jisoo figured that there was no harm in telling her that.
"You're right," Jisoo laughed. "You're absolutely right." A pause. "You're beautiful."
Jennie whipped her head up and looked at Jisoo with wide eyes. "W-what?"
"I think you look really beautiful right now," Jisoo exhaled and stepped forward. She couldn't believe she was doing this. "That's why I'm so awkward around you. I just don't know how to act. I get nervous around pretty girls."
Jennie laughed and Jisoo took it as an opportunity to pull Jennie in for a kiss, swallowing all her laughter.
From that night, Jisoo became addicted to the scent of vanilla.