This chapter is a situation. Have fun.
Trigger Warnings: Mentions of grief, mentions of hate, mentions of hospitalization, mentions of death, extreme pain
Everest stepped out of the Portal with Alec and Magnus, each with an armful of paper bags. Everest and Magnus shared a smile as Alec ranted.
"I mean, how would they feel?"
"Well I'm glad you didn't ask in front of the sushi chef," Everest said as they set their bags down in the living room.
"Well, seriously, why do they call it fatty tuna?" Alec asked, for the third time since leaving the sushi restaurant. "I mean, that's a little degrading."
Everest stifled a laugh. It was adorable when Alec got all fired up about topics like this.
"Because of the fat content?" Everest guessed. She reached up to try and brush the glitter from Alec's hair. It didn't work.
"Hmm, well, I don't think obese tuna sounds any better," Magnus mused. He set an old clay vase he had bought on the side table.
Everest tossed her jacket onto the couch and started setting out the books she had bought on the coffee table. They were so pretty it hurt.
"You know, as much as I love Tokyo and Prague, a bacon burger from the East Village isn't that bad," Alec said.
Magnus blinked for a moment as he took off his coat, but Everest just laughed.
"It's pretty good when you're sixteen years old and drunk out of your mind and need food," Everest added.
"I need that story," Magnus said with a grin. Everest grinned back.
"I got you two something," Alec said, turning around with two small bags in his hand. He handed one to each of them.
"Me?" Magnus and Everest said together.
"Yes, both of you," he said with a small smile. "Open it."
Everest pulled out a red and gold woven charm with a white swirl on top. It was soft and light. She adored it and she didn't even have any idea what it was.
"It's supposed to bring you luck and protection," Alec explained. "Which we all need a bit of."
Everest shrugged sheepishly. "Thank you, Alec, really. I love it," she said, going up on her tiptoes to give him a kiss.
"Thank you, Alexander. You continue to surprise me," Magnus said, stepping closer to Alec. Everest stepped back to let them have a moment and grabbed the bags they had discarded.
Then giggling filled the apartment and Everest let out a strangled, mostly quiet, shout of frustration. Alec and Magnus both sighed.
"I haven't had a roommate this brazen since...well, since Casanova and I spent the night in the Doge's Palace," Magnus said with a thoughtful expression.
"Cassanova?" Alec scoffed and Everest wondered what that was about. "I'll talk to Jace. He can't stay here forever."
"I'll hit him," Everest offered. She was only half joking.
"No, no." Magnus stopped Alec from storming into the guest room. "Nothing a little magic can't fix."
Magnus snapped his fingers and an upbeat, lyricless song started.
"All good?"
Everest smiled mischievously. "Yep. Except Alec has more glitter in his hair than I did when I reunited with Izzy after far too long without seeing her."
Alec frowned and ran a hand through his hair. He grimaced when a cloud of glitter rained down around him. "And whose fault is that?"
"Not mine," she said easily, leaning against the wall. "I'm not the one who got in the way of the glitter bombs."
"You hid behind me," Alec deadpanned. "You hid behind me when the teenagers ran down the street with glitter bombs. Why were there even teenagers running around the streets with glitter bombs?"
Everest shrugged, even as Magnus chuckled and waved Alec towards the showers.
"Everest's right, you need a shower. I love glitter, I do, but you look like a mess."
Alec rolled his eyes but left to shower anyway.
Another giggle overpowered the music and Everest groaned.
"He's so done," she snapped. "Absolutely done for."
Magnus chuckled and wrapped an arm around her waist. "You know what would drown out the noise?"
Everest couldn't take it. She burst out laughing, doubling over and leaning into Magnus in order not to fall. "That wasn't smooth at all," she said, still laughing. "Like, that was about as smooth as Steve Evan's pickup lines and his pickup lines were like grating chalk."
"I almost feel sorry for the kid," Magnus said with a grin as he leaned down to kiss Everest.
"Don't. That's a terrible decision."
"Okay, I won't."
She tilted her head up to meet him halfway.
...
Everest's phone chimed and she cursed under her breath. Her phone lit up with the angelic rune, the Institute's alert. Everest leaned back to check it and then she leaned her head against Magnus's shoulder. His breath tickled her neck.
"Damn it. I have to go," she said, frowning.
Magnus smiled. "Go do your job Shadowhunter. I'm not going anywhere."
"All right."
Everest stood up reluctantly, straightening her clothes and hair, and knocked on the bathroom door. "Alec! We need to get to the Institute now."
"I'll be out in a few," he called back.
Everest approached the guest room warily, but then she steeled herself and opened the door. She would hit Jace if she needed to. Hell, she'd hit whoever Jace had with him too.
"We have orders, let's go," she snapped. She stared up at the ceiling so that she could avoid looking at Jace and whoever was with him.
"I'm a little tied up," Jace said. Everest sighed.
"You're welcome to join us," the girl Jace had with him said.
Everest gagged. "No, I'm good. That's my brother."
"I'll give you two a minute," the girl said.
"No, you can just leave," Everest said with a tense, pity filled smile.
"Stay," Jace said.
Everest waited until she heard the door, which she assumed was the bathroom door because she was still blocking the door to the hall, open and shut before she looked at the floor long enough to locate Jace's jeans and throw them at his face with as much force as possible. He just barely caught them.
"This is your solution? Hiding out at Magnus's?"
"I wouldn't exactly call this hiding," Jace said, getting dressed. Oh didn't Everest know it.
"We have obligations," Everest reminded him.
"Obligations." He scoffed. "Aldertree wanted me gone and I'm gone."
Everest didn't bother pointing out that this wasn't exactly what she thought Aldertree meant. It wouldn't do any good. "So you got demoted. So what? You'll work your way back up."
"You don't understand."
"Then tell me," she said firmly. "Whatever it is, it can't be that bad." Jace was silent. "So what? You're just ignoring your job? Ignoring everyone, including your family and friends, so that you can fuck some random girl in my boyfriend's guest room? Do you know how fucking sad that is?"
Jace scoffed. "I don't need a reminder of how pathetic my life is, Everest." He stood up and gestured at the door. "You know what? You should leave. We don't want you getting benched when you've only just entered the field."
The silence was stifling.
"This isn't you," she said softly after a moment. She walked away without another word.
"I'm going to seriously hurt him before the week is done," she announced as she and Alec left the apartment.
"I know the feeling," Alec said, bumping her arm. "Trust me when I say that it doesn't go away."
"So reassuring," she said, laughing a little.
The two met up with Clary just outside the Institute.
"Hey Clary," Everest greeted, still relatively cautious of using the nickname she had for her sister. She wasn't sure if it would be well received or not after she killed their mom.
"Hey Ev," Clary greeted, a small smile on her face. "Hey Alec."
"Little girl." Alec's tone was blank but there was a smile in his eyes and Everest let out another laugh.
"Any idea what this is about?" Clary asked as they walked into the Institute.
"Hear a big storm's moving in. Always increases demon activity," Alec explained.
"And Jace is..."
"Not here," Everest interrupted. She really did not have the mental capacity to explain whatever was going on with Jace, or what she knew at least.
"He's totally shut me out," Clary said. "He's not answering my texts. I don't understand what's going on."
"Me either," Alec said and Everest brushed her hand against his in comfort. "Come on."
They walked into the Ops Center to see Izzy standing in front of a holographic screen, gripping her wrist tightly. Everest went to stand beside her and placed her hand over Izzy's. The other girl leaned her head on Everest's for a moment before straightening to attention.
"What'd we miss?" Alec asked.
Oh no. Everest knew that look. Whenever Izzy got that look where her lips parted and upturned at the same time and her eyebrows were starting to knit together, nothing good was going to follow. A glance at Alec told her that he knew it too, and a glance at Clary told her that she was starting to figure it out.
"Let's see. The Citadel was breached. Magdalena is dead. Cleophas is missing."
Everest knew it.
"Shit."
"Oh, my god. Valentine?" Clary sounded resigned.
"Who else could it be?" Izzy sighed. "Aldertree's heading to Idris to meet with the Council."
"I'll go check with ops," Alec said and then walked away.
Everest and Izzy went to walk away, Everest wasn't quite sure where she was going to go but she was sure she'd figure it out, but Clary's voice stopped them.
"Izzy. Everest." They turned to face the redhead. "There's something I need to tell you about Sister Cleophas."
"That you told her about your new rune?" Izzy asked, voice sharp and accusing.
Everest's heart started beating faster and her fists clenched. She watched Clary carefully. Please don't let it be true, she thought desperately. Clary would have told her if she made a new rune, right?
No she wouldn't, not now, that stupid voice in the back of her head whispered darkly.
Everest winced when Clary gasped. "How did you know I—"
"Does it matter?" Izzy said savagely. "You should know what it feels like when the people you care about shut you out."
"Izzy, Everest, Jace told me it would be dangerous for anyone who found out."
"So now we need to be protected?" Everest's voice was too high, too tense. "I'm your sister, your twin. We've been through hell together. You were there in the hospital with me, I helped you through so much. We've been together through this whole shit show of a father situation. And now Mom—"
"You don't get to tell us if we need to be protected," Izzy said in a low, dangerous voice. "You aren't in charge of us, you don't get to decide whether or not we get to know important information or not."
"Izzy, Everest, I'm sorry. Look, we all care about the Iron Sisters. We need to find Sister Cleophas. We can do it together." Clary looked desperate. But what Everest didn't know was if she was desperate for their help or desperate for them to forgive her.
"I'm kind of over this whole togetherness thing," Izzy said and walked away without glancing back.
Clary turned to Everest with a hopeful expression tinged with hurt. "Everest—"
"No. You don't get to do that stupid guilt trip you try to pull so often."
"But—"
"You know, I think you were over the whole twin thing ages ago. I might be getting there too."
Everest walked away without another word.
She stalked to the kitchen, her steps hurried and quiet at the same time, and found the largest coffee thermos she could find. Her mauve mug was in her room and she didn't feel like dealing with any more people than she had to, which is what going to get her mauve mug would do. She fixed herself coffee and grabbed the container of strawberries from the fridge before slipping into the hallway, blending in with the crowd.
She stormed up the back stairs that Izzy had told her about when they were kids and she was describing the Institute to a nine year old Everest.
"And there's this set of stairs in the far corner that can get you almost anywhere, including the roof," she had said with more excitement than Everest had, at the time, thought possible. Since then she had been proven wrong many times.
Everest let the door close behind her with a soft thud and sat down in the middle of the roof where she, just a few nights before, had thrown rocks at nearby roofs for almost an hour. She didn't know how long she sat there, drinking coffee and eating strawberries, before Alec sat beside her. She jumped slightly. She hadn't heard him approach.
"Hi," she said softly.
"Hey." He nudged her shoulder with his gently and gave her a small smile as he took a strawberry.
Trigger Warning: Mentions of grief, mentions of hate, mentions of hospitalization, mentions of death
They sat in silence for a moment and then Everest sighed.
"Does Clary hate me? And be honest, please."
Alec was quiet for a moment. He set the strawberry top back in the container. "I don't think she hates you, not really. I think she's just grieving and doesn't have an outlet for her grief."
"That doesn't give her the right to take it out on others," Everest said, glancing over the city. "I lost my mom too."
"No, it doesn't," Alec agreed. He glanced at her. "How are you doing with all of it? Your mom's death, Valentine, the whole ShadowWorld chaos, all of it."
Everest let out a noise somewhere between a scoff and a laugh. "Loaded question, Love. That's a broad, loaded question."
She froze as the term of endearment slipped out and glanced over at him worriedly. What if he got upset with it? What if he didn't like it? But Alec just smiled and Everest relaxed.
"How about I narrow it down?" he suggested. She hummed in agreement and bit into another strawberry. She grimaced as juice dribbled down her chin and did her best to wipe it away. "How are you feeling right now?"
Everest let out a breath. "Stressed, anxious, upset."
"Is there a reason that you can pinpoint that's the cause of those emotions?"
She glanced at him with raised eyebrows. "Did Izzy make you watch one of her therapist shows?"
He laughed and Everest wished she could replay the sound whenever she was upset. There was something about it, possibly that Alec's laugh in its most genuine form was so rare, that just made things seem better. "No, she hasn't made me watch them in a long time."
Everest shifted a little closer to him as a breeze picked up. She forced her mind back to the more serious topic. "Jace is getting on my nerves and Clary is being the worst version of Clary to date. I don't know why either. We were so close as kids, even before I was hospitalized. She had secrets, of course she did. I did too, still do. Everyone does. But now she's keeping big secrets, things that could change everything and I don't know what to say to her."
Alec looked concerned at her mentioning being hospitalized but Everest really didn't want to talk about that just now. She wasn't ready to rehash the memories she locked away years ago. She wasn't ready to recall the memories behind the scars that laced her torso like a web of death.
Trigger Warning over
"What happened with Clary?" Alec asked instead, as if realizing that Everest didn't want to talk about her hospitalization just then.
"She made a rune and didn't tell anyone but Sister Cleophas, who's now missing."
"That's not possible," he said tensely.
"Izzy saw it apparently."
Alec looked at her for a long moment, then groaned. "Great. Another reason why people will fawn over her."
Everest smiled tiredly and leaned her head on Alec's shoulder. His leather jacket was surprisingly comfortable.
"How're you doing with being in what feels like your first polyamourous relationship?" Everest asked him, relishing in the warmth that came from her coffee.
"I'm not going to lie, it's my first relationship ever."
Everest restrained herself not to make a strangled noise of surprise, though she did allow herself to hum in intrigue and slight surprise. "Oh?"
"No need to sound so shocked." Alec scoffed good naturedly.
"It's just—" Everest hummed, trying to figure out how to word this without being unintentionally insulting. "You're so Alec and wonderful."
"I'm going to take that as a compliment."
"As you should." Everest accepted the arm Alec wrapped around her gratefully. "You didn't answer my question. How are you doing with being in your first relationships?"
Alec was quiet as he ate a strawberry. "It's a little overwhelming at times, I'll admit. Sometimes I forget that I have two people who aren't related to me who care so much. And then I see you or Magnus and I remember and I get so inexplicably happy."
Everest smiled warmly. "I know the feeling. When I was sixteen I met a girl named Seraphina. I was dating a girl named Melody at the time and I was already out to her. After Seraphina and I started dating—I was still dating Melody too—sometimes I would get so overwhelmed by all the love and care from them that I would just break down in tears. Other times I would forget that I had any partners at all and would be so startled when I remembered."
Alec's arm tightened ever so slightly around Everest as he asked, "How'd you get used to it?"
"I sort of just cried in happiness for a few hours one day and then changed my phone background so that I'd have a reminder and not accidentally forget I was dating people and end up hurting someone." Everest rubbed her neck sheepishly. "That might not work for everyone though."
Alec chuckled, the sound rumbling in his chest. "I'd imagine not." He rubbed her arm gently with his thumb. "How are you feeling about our relationship? I know I'm new at this and you're not, not really, and I don't want to do anything wrong."
Everest tugged her jacket around her tighter and looked up at Alec. "It was kind of rough timing, me getting taken by Valentine and all, but it's been pretty good since I got back. You haven't done anything wrong," she assured him. He looked instantly relieved. Everest hated that he was so worried. "I do think that we—you, Magnus, and me—could all benefit from having a conversation about boundaries together so that we don't cross any in the future."
Alec nodded, mulling over the idea. "That's—that's probably a good idea. How does later today sound? I can ask Magnus when I go over in a little bit."
Everest nodded and rested her head on Alec's shoulder again, watching a flock of birds fly by. "That sounds good. But can we just stay here for a moment? It's nice up here and it's quiet and you're comfortable. Plus, we haven't had a moment in a while."
"I like that plan." He tilted her head up and pressed a kiss to the corner of her mouth. Then he chuckled.
"What?" she asked, eyes widening.
"You have strawberry juice down your chin."
Everest groaned and scrubbed at the juice with her sleeve, Alec laughing softly.
...
Everest knocked on the door to Magnus's apartment and it opened for her a moment later. Alec and Magnus were curled up on the couch, both looking freshly showered and smug. She raised an eyebrow at their new clothes as she dropped her bag on the entryway table.
"Hope I'm not interrupting," she teased with a smile.
To her amusement and delight, both of them flushed, though Magnus smirked.
"Not just now Cupcake."
She laughed, genuinely laughed, when Alec's cheeks reddened further. "You're so easily embarrassed Alec, it's great."
Alec scoffed, but the smile on his face ruined the effect. "Yeah yeah."
"I'm gonna make dinner," she said, walking into the kitchen.
"What are you making?" Magnus asked, craning his neck to see her.
"Either pasta or stir fry depending on what's in the fridge."
"I think there's stir fry stuff," Magnus mused.
"Wanna help me? I also know where nothing but the coffee mugs and Skittles are so help might make dinner go faster."
Magnus stood up to help her, but Alec continued lounging on the couch, watching her and Magnus with an adorable smile on his face.
"The rice is on the third shelf in the cupboard to your right and the pans are in the island cupboard." Magnus started pulling things from the fridge. "So Alec said you had something you wanted to talk about?"
Everest set a large pan on the stove and gave him a small smile. "That's a conversation to be had over dinner because I'm not certain that I have had food other than strawberries and coffee today, and having potentially big serious conversations over a relatively empty stomach doesn't feel like my best idea."
Magnus stared at her for a moment then shook his head with a laugh. "That's fair."
Everest paused in preparing dinner to hit play on her playlist. She grinned as Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy came on.
"I can dim the lights and sing you songs full of sad things. We can do the tango just for two. I can serenade and gently play on your heart strings. Be your Valentino just for you," she sang as she chopped up the broccoli. "Ooh, love, ooh, loverboy. What're you doin' tonight, hey, boy? Set my alarm, turn on my charm. That's because I'm a good old-fashioned loverboy."
She danced around a little as she cooked and sang along, grinning even more than before when Magnus and surprisingly Alec joined in.
"Ooh, love (There he goes again). (He's my good old fashioned lover boy) Ooh, loverboy. What're you doin' tonight, hey, boy? Everything's alright. Just hold on tight. That's because I'm a good old-fashioned (fashioned) loverboy," Magnus sang as he wrapped his arms around Everest's waist and pulled her to his chest.
"I'm sure you are," she said with a smile as she tilted her head up for a kiss. He complied and pressed a sweet, if relatively upside down, kiss to her lips. They both jumped as the pan hissed. Then Everest started laughing.
"That's what we get for not paying attention to the food I guess," she said, stirring the vegetables.
They finished dinner relatively soon after and sat down to eat on the living room floor around the coffee table because Everest couldn't stand chairs. Everest had turned the music down low enough for it to not be distracting enough for her to burst into song whenever a new song started.
"This is so good," Alec said earnestly.
She smiled. "Thanks. It's not my grilling but I can cook a few things indoors that turn out great."
"You grill?" Magnus sounded surprised.
"Yeah, I grew up with Luke, Brad, and Jay along with four other kids my age and one a few years younger, none of which had no interest in grilling, so naturally I picked it up." Everest shrugged. "It's fun and gives me something to do at cookouts besides sunbathe and do nothing."
They ate in silence for a few moments and then Magnus glanced up. "So Alec said you wanted for us to have a conversation about boundaries and stuff like that?"
Everest shifted so that she was cross legged and nodded. "Yeah. And it's not that anything happened, because it didn't, it's just that in my experience things tend to go better when everyone's clear on boundaries."
Magnus hummed. "That makes sense. I've never really had to have those sorts of conversations in the past, but I'll do my best."
"I will too, even though I have no experience either," Alec said with a reassuring smile.
"Every time I've had this type of conversation was with a teenager so we're sorta on equal grounds here," she said, only half joking.
"Well how do we want to start?" Alec asked. He took a sip from his water as he looked between the two of them.
"Uhm, we could each say one thing we're okay with and one thing we're not?" Magnus suggested. Everest was glad she wasn't the only one who wasn't entirely sure how to start the conversation. Usually when she had this conversation it was because something had gone wrong. It was a nice change, even if it meant she had no clue how to start the conversation.
"I could start?" Everest offered.
"Go for it."
Everest uncrossed her legs. "I'm okay with affection and stuff in public. And uh, I'm not okay with things like my stims being mimicked or mocked."
Alec and Magnus both smiled at her and Alec ran a thumb over her hand.
"I'll go next," Magnus said. "I'm okay with both of you being here whenever, just let me know ahead of time. I'm not okay with the whole 'I'm too embarrassed to be me in public' thing. I get it if being overly affectionate in front of certain people may feel like too much right now, but I don't appreciate feeling like a dirty secret."
Everest nodded in understanding. She knew exactly what he meant. "I get it," she said with a faintly bittersweet smile. " I hope that I've never and will never make you feel like that."
"I'm sorry you ever felt like that," Alec told him.
Magnus smiled gently and patted both their hands before taking a sip of the herbal tea he had made. "Your turn Alexander."
Alec thought for a moment. "I'm okay with being affectionate in front of most people, but I won't lie, it may take a bit for me to be fully comfortable being affectionate around my parents."
"That's okay," Magnus told him. Everest nodded in agreement and her head twinged in pain. She pressed a hand to her temple for a moment before taking another drink of water. "That's normal. That's part of learning and growing as a person and in a relationship."
Alec smiled at him and continued on. "I'm not okay with..." he trailed off. "I don't know why I'm blanking all of a sudden."
"It's fine," Everest told him. "I get it. I do it all the time. Just let us know if you think of anything, okay?"
"Okay." Alec nodded and they all kept eating, conversation flowing naturally. There was a distinct lightness on Everest's shoulders now that a difficult conversation was out of the way.
Trigger warning: extreme pain
"...and Roslyn just comes running like some sort of creature is chasing her and—" Everest cut herself off as she clutched her head. A sharp, high pitched scream rang in her head, bouncing all around like a pinball game gone right.
"Everest? What's wrong?" Alec asked hurriedly.
"My head feels like it's splitting open," she grunted. The noise only increased as she gripped her head tighter so she loosened her grip. Somehow it got worse.
She was pulled into someone's arms—she was too focused on the pain to notice who it was—and cradled gently.
"I'm getting her a pain reliever Caterina made," Magnus said. His voice was muffled by the scream.
She groaned and twisted in a vain effort to make the screaming stop. It hurt so bad. Tears fell down her face and the arms around her tightened.
"It hurts," she whimpered. The scream got louder.
"I know, Darling, I know. Just hold on a little longer. Magnus is getting something to help."
Everest twisted more as the scream echoed in her ears too. No. It had to stop. Please, she begged silently. Make it stop.
Something cool was pressed to her lips. "Drink this, please. It'll help." Magnus's voice, though muffled, sounded pained and it only made her cry more. He didn't deserve to be hurt, to be in pain, especially because of her.
Everest parted her lips and forced herself to drink the lemony drink. The pain only lessened slightly and the screaming continued.
"Why isn't it working?"
"I don't know! It usually works."
Their voices were blurring together and Everest whimpered again. Why did it hurt so bad?
Another pair of arms enveloped her and she tried to make the pain go away so she could focus on the feeling of being hugged by two of her favorite people. It didn't work. Everest wanted to shout and scream and throw all her rage at the screaming that was trying to rip her brain apart. But all she could do was curl up further, clutch her head more, and cry as the screaming continued.
Until it didn't.
It didn't slowly die off or get softer until it wasn't there anymore. It just cut off without warning. The silence that followed was almost as bad as the screaming. It was too quiet, too perfectly still in her mind.
Trigger warning over
"Everest?" Alec's voice was still slightly muddled, but it was better than before.
"It's gone," she said. Her voice was small and weak. The tears kept falling. "It just stopped."
The arms around her tightened.
"It's okay Cupcake, you're with us," Magnus told her gently. Sounds were getting a little clearer.
"You're okay Darling, you're okay."
But was she?