"Love is not written on paper, for paper can be erased.
Nor is it etched on stone, for stone can be broken.
But it is inscribed on a heart and there it shall remain forever."
- Unknown
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His Little Tiger is in trouble and Lan Xichen has no idea how to help him.
He has a half mad contingency plan already decided, no matter the guilt that churns for making one. He is the Sect Leader of Gusu Lan and well within his rights to offer Nie Huaisang shelter, until all of this has blown over. A refuge, nothing more. Not imprisonment like his mother, but honest sanctuary.
It sounds diplomatic, like he's offering shelter from a rainstorm. It doesn't describe how that shelter comes with Lan Xichen's sword, every drop of his cultivation and martial arts. It doesn't sound like Lan Xichen is perfectly willing to throw his life and the lives of his disciples on the line. But that is exactly what shelter means.
He will not sit by and watch Nie Huaisang being whipped or beaten. He will not sit by as he's arrested for the crime of keeping everyone else alive. He will not be some bystander, when the man he loves is kicked.
He's lying to himself, if he doesn't want to keep Nie Huaisang safe for the rest of their lives, but he won't be their father.
Right now, Huaisang is on his way back from Meng Yao. He tries to deny it to himself, but it hurts that Nie Huaisang, who happens to be in a relationship with him, didn't tell him about this. He had to hear about it accidentally.
Had to overhear him telling Meng Yao. As much as it's a relief he went to A-Yao when he was afraid for his life, who would always protect Huaisang, it still hurts that he left Lan Xichen's side and found sanctuary there. Lan Xichen was rooms away and always trying to be good enough...but once again he wasn't.
It hurts and he tells himself that it isn't just to be obsessing about that detail, when there are far bigger problems.
Its mid afternoon when Lan Xichen gives in and finally calls A-Zhan, telling him all of what they heard and the ramifications, he knows are vast. He wants A-Zhan's take on this situation and if he's completely honest, he wants his brother's support.
A thing that's taken him years to learn to ask for, but rather than be annoyed or burdened, like Lan Xichen still half-feared, A-Zhan listens intently and nods along. He seems pleased that Xichen is telling him this and that at least calms Xichen' heart.
He also sees right through Lan Xichen and offers a bandage for his hurting heart, without judgment.
"If he's been threatened before, that you would get hurt, he might be afraid to tell you. Meng Yao is of lesser rank and perhaps considered unimportant by the traitors." A-Zhan says, furious that he himself has been used as a threat. "They threatened people and followed through with it. They murdered Nie Rong as a proof that they could. Perhaps they have killed others and bragged to Nie Huaisang."
He knows that his lover is clever, far more than he is ever given credit for. He knows that he's secretive in bizarre ways and enviously open in others. He knows A-Sang's been let down in the most basic and in the loudest of ways and it broke something of his trust.
His brother is sitting in the kitchen, Lan Xichen realizes looking at the red cupboards behind him and the doorway leading to the living room. It looks like the television is on, so presumably A-Zhan is babysitting Sizhui. Which is adorable. Even stressed, Lan Xichen takes a moment to really appreciate what fatherhood looks like on his younger brother.
The blue lines under this eyes have gone, his golden eyes bright and back to their usual intensity. His clothes are casual and he's relaxed sitting there, looking at home, which for his brother is a miracle on its own.
He's happy, he thinks. A-Zhan looks content in a way Lan Xichen has never seen before.
As he digests this, his inner older brother cheering despite his predicament, A-Zhan frowns minutely and Lan Xichen braces himself.
"The bigger issue Brother, is that Nie Huaisang has decided to take drastic action." A-Zhan says quietly.
"He's being threatened." Lan Xichen immediately defends.
"Yes. For a number of years." A-Zhan replies patiently. "Why choose now to reveal everything? If this situation is not contained and controlled, Nie Huaisang's part in it, will be sensationalist. Those guilty will be overlooked in favor of the sandal surrounding Nie Huaisang."
Lan Xichen wanted to argue but A-Zhan continued, in that steady quiet voice. "Legally, Qinghe SCD can press charges against him."
"Why?"
"Concealing evidence of a crime. Concealing evidence of first degree murder, conspiracy to commit murder. Sheltering." A-Zhan said calmly. "If it is kept as a sect matter, Nie Huaisang will be punished by Qinghe Nie law." Which Lan Xichen was vert aware of, but not of the potential legal threats against him.
"So their crimes need to be released before Nie Huaisang does his reveal." Lan Xichen said thoughtfully.
"But why now?" A-Zhan pressed.
"What do you mean?"
"Nie Huisang was coerced into silence though threats, presumably with a strong show of power. This has been continuing for years. Why now?" A-Zhan asked again. "He spoke at the time of his father being murdered. It was ignored."
"He never said that to me." Lan Xichen admits, the hurt intensifying.
"By the time he came to Caiyi, he accepted no one would listen and nothing could be done. And this was the time I presume, he was first threatened. They would not want you to know." A-Zhan reasons.
That...makes sense. As Mingjue's closest friend, he would have far more sway. As a young Sect Leader he could make a scene and demand theoretically, an investigation.
Why wait until now to do a reveal? But Lan Xichen thought of the anger and desperation in his Little Tiger's voice. "You think he's been threatened again?"
"With something he cannot agree with." A-Zhan nods stoically.
Something against the Jiang? Something against Nie Mingjue?
Whatever it was, Huaisang had to act before someone else did something.
"If I can realize the proof before Huaisang does his reveal, or at least delay it, will that help didi?" He asks, hiding his own desperation.
"If Nie Huaisang goes to the authorities elsewhere, if he cannot trust Qinghe SCD, then the evidence will have to be addressed. If Nie Mingue acts as Sect Leader against the traitors within his sect, that keeps it within sect law."
"I'll speak to Mingjue." Lan Xichen decides and then smiles. "What about teaching Sizhui, Mother's biscuit recipe?"
A-Zhan glances at the living room and his brother's stoic countenance, beams. He nods as if he's being handed an important mission and a tiny smile curves his lips. Oh yes. Lan Xichen thinks. Soon, I'll have a nephew.
==
The conversation with Mingjue is a difficult one as they wait for Huaisang to return.
For one thing it escalates into an argument and Mingjue utters one sentence that changes everything.
"This is a Qinghe domestic matter Xichen. Its not Gusu Lan's burden."
Leave? Abandon Huaisang to take on the Nie Sect, many of whom want him hurt or dead? Lan Xichen can think of many things he would never do and abandoning his Little Tiger is one of them. Go back to Gusu and just wait out the verdict?
"This is about Nie Huaisang. His life and freedom." Lan Xichen argues after half a beat. "Why would I not stay?"
"He's my brother Xichen. And while I appreciate your support,"
This is the final straw for him. He might be learning how to ask for help, remolding himself to more open about his own needs, something that still felt wrong to him, but he had never had any trouble fighting for others. He had no qualms about fighting for A-Sang. If there is one aspect of himself that's solid, it's sheer perseverance. A complete dedication. Being willing to put in the effort to make something work, to achieve the highest he can, with whatever he faces. And A-Sang is worth it all.
They were standing in middle of the closed courtyard, both of them sleepless and worried about what Huaisang was doing, both stewing in guilt that hadn't known. But Lan Xichen was not going to abandon the Nie brothers.
So truth was the only way out. He told himself that it didn't matter, if Da Ge took this badly. They were adults and Huaisang wasn't even living here, but he didn't want them to be the excuse of a true break in the brothers' relationship.
The Nie Mingjue of the past would not react well. The Nie Mingjue of now was different.
"There are other things you don't know. Or rather, don't remember." Lan Xichen snaps and Mingjue finally lifts himself out of his self-imposed misery and distraction, to look up at his abrupt tone.
"Like what?" Mingjue asks, suspicious and on the verge of taking offense already.
"Like the fact that Huaisang was not only a lifeline to A-Yao." Lan Xichen states bravely, refusing to back down. "For me as well."
"When?" Mingjue asks, torn between horrified and upset.
"After Gusu...burned. I...wasn't in a good place." At Mingjue's stricken look, he adds, "Not suicidal. Not like A-Yao" The guilt was going to haunt him for a life time. "...but I was at my lowest point when Huaisang visited Gusu. He was a bright point in my darkest days." He huffed a self-depreciating laugh. "I think I only ate and slept when Huaisang prompted me. He covered for me too, when I just blacked out at the table once."
"Didn't I...?" Mingjue asked, as if half fearing the answer.
Knowing how that felt, Lan Xichen quickly said, "You were in a mess yourself Da ge. You had just taken over the Nie Sect and your father was dead. You weren't estranged...but things between you and Huaisang were....they weren't good."
"He helped you." Mingjue said softly. "Good. I'm glad he,"
"He was my lifeline and when he came back for university, he needed help. I was too worried for him living on his own in Caiyi, so as you know," He wasn't sure if Mingjue was aware, but he soldiered on. "Huaisang was living in Gusu, in one of the scholar houses."
These were houses traditionally for senior scholars who came to study in Gusu for months at time.
Mingjue hadn't remembered that but he nodded, confused as to where this was going. But he was clever and used to reading in-between lines. His eyes narrowed. "Are you telling me, you and my brother were in a relationship?" He demanded.
"Not then!" Lan Xichen defended immediately. "I fell in love with him yes, but I was never going to do anything about it!"
Nie Mingjue blinked, "Why not?" He asked.
Lan Xichen spluttered. "Because he's two years my junior! Because I never thought he would think of me like that. Because he's your brother. For most of our lives, I thought of him solely as your little brother!"
"He's had a crush on you nearly our entire lives." Nie Mingjue replied, a smile curving his mustache.
When Lan Xichen stared at him, he finally laughed. "I can't believe this. Its you he's been seeing, not Meng Yao?"
Lan Xichen blinked shocked, then thought about it. Wasn't he feeling hurt that Huaisang had gone to Meng Yao. It wasn't that much of a leap.
"Huaisang genuinely loves him as a brother." Lan Xichen said confidently. "The same is true for A-Yao. You're the one he was talking about."
"What?" Mingjue barked, eyes going wide. "You mean..."
"You never actually talked about it." Lan Xichen said quickly. "I think you just declared you didn't want anyone. Before he was getting married."
To his sister. Oh A-Yao.
"So I never rejected him?"
"No." Lan Xichen shook his head, a smile curving his own lips.
Nie Mingjue actually looked relieved there and Lan Xichen waited. Walking around the courtyard thinking, Mingjue asked too casually, "So how long have you been dating and why don't I know?"
Dangerous question.
"Huaisang was convinced I was going to wake up one day and break up with him. He didn't want anyone to know until we made it to six months."
"Do you love him?" Nie Mingjue demanded.
"I've loved him for years. I'll love him for the rest of my life." Lan Xichen told him firmly. "Are you very angry?"
"That I wasn't told?" Mingjue asks dropping into a garden chair. "If Huaisang is letting his insecurity rule him, he wouldn't want to tell me. He'll think I'll say no."
Huaisang was an adult and not even entirely of the Nie Sect at the moment, but that was the power of their brotherly relationship that defied so-called estrangement.
"I'm glad its you." Nie Mingjue said firmly. "He's had his heart broken by scum. You would treat him right and make him happy."
Lan Xichen wanted names but refrained from asking. "Which is why I can't leave."
Nie Mingjue smiled. "I would beat you up if you did." He scrubbed a hand over his face. "I want to be honest and admit we overheard Xichen, but I am aware that might break the fragile trust we have going."
"I am of the Lan Sect. Lying is not in my nature, but there is nothing stopping us finding evidence on our own and no proof that you haven't been looking into...discrepancies." Lan Xichen replied.
====
When Huaisang came back, he was sent to a private suite of rooms with Nie Zonghui.
Meng Yao came with him, pale faced and worried as Huaisang was guided off. Lan Xichen knew as soon as he turned around that he was going to argue for A-Sang, his dark eyes carrying something of a betrayed hint.
Nie Mingjue realizing now that Meng Yao wasn't cheating on his 'fiancee' with Huaisang which was what he apparently feared and never asked, watched his brother go. Before either of them could speak, he said abruptly, "Now Huaisang is safe, we need to do something with this harebrained plan."
"Da Ge?" Meng Yao asked, realizing that something wasn't quite adding up here.
"Huaisang is in trouble." Mingjue replied, "No not with the fight. The disciples responsible for ganging up on my brother are undergoing punishment. We have bigger problems."
He turned to Meng Yao and said, "I need your help."
===
By nightfall they have a plan and Meng Yao has already worked out how to corroborate Huaisang's evidence with what they find. He points out that Huaisang is going to be difficult, having shouldered this danger on his own for so long.
That doesn't stop Lan Xichen from crossing the courtyard towards the rooms where Huaisang is staying.
Its been hours since he arrived and the need to see him is burning in his chest.
Nie Mingjue had deftly pointed out that having Lan Xichen sleeping in the same room, limited whatever attempts someone might make. It didn't stop the blush or the awkward tension that swam from the depths of all the recent discoveries either. Thankfully, Da Ge just waved him off and both of them ignored Meng Yao's honest joy and amusement.
"Good night Er-ge." Was all he said, his smile clearly suppressed, eyes sparkling.
The fact that Nie Mingjue was staring at Meng Yao like he hadn't seen him years, had Lan Xichen disappearing from the room with a smile of his own.
The wards accepted him easily and he slipped inside the suite of rooms, an apartment really. One he thinks Nie Mingjue kept for visiting Sect Leaders.
Its richly furnished with reds and greys, stark in its metallic look with only the bamboo floor to disturb the balance.
Its not that late, not for a Nie, but he finds Huaisang asleep on the bed. Emotionally overwrought, and no doubt exhausted after using a portal talisman that usually takes high cultivation to achieve. A risky endeavor that they will be talking about later!
His heart wants to break for him, but Lan Xichen only gathers his Tiger to him and gets ready for bed. Huaisang doesn't stir as he tucks him in, covering him with the duvet, wishing he had brought another blanket with how cold it was in the room.
He misses their room in their rented apartment in Yunmeng, and vows when this is over, they'll figure out something a little more permanent.
Huaisang grumbles adorably in his sleep, brows darkening with unhappiness. Lan Xichen kisses his forehead and gently embraces him, curling around the shorter man with love in his heart and determination to protect him.
In the morning, Nie Huaisang was going to panic. He knew this and told himself to accept it.
His Fierce Little Tiger was going to panic and try to shift Lan Xichen out of his life 'to save him'. The idea was both at once incredibly insulting and yet understandable. Lan Xichen didn't need saving. He was a warrior down to his bones and the leader of his sect. He had survived the burning of his home and was at the pinnacle of Lan martial arts, swordsmanship and honed training.
More than anything, though even if he had nothing but his will alone, without support, a golden core or fight training, he would still never give up on the man he loves.
So he will fight every argument Nie Huaisang has planned. He will swallow the hurt that he knows is coming and love Huaisang anyway.
With any luck, they can resolve this quickly.
If all else fails, he will take Nie Huaisang to Gusu.