Hi everyone! For those who have read this far! I am Hitemwiththefour and I have been writing this story for a while now! I love the idea of a poly fic and I love hockey so I figured I would put it forth on Wattpad as well as A03 and Tumblr but I would like to thank you for reading it!
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Chapter 11
My phone rang and I silenced it. I didn't Have time to talk to the boys. Especially after I had sent them a memo saying I would be unavailable for the time being due to a big project and my father being sick. I am currently sitting in a hospital room with him at Ottawa General. My phone goes off again and I silence it again before shutting my laptop and getting up to go for a walk while he's sleeping. My father and I had a strained relationship due to my parents divorcing. He was not always the father I needed when I needed him and for that I was resentful. Things happened when his father died and we had to travel to Pittsburgh to attend the funeral, he took to the internet (specifically Facebook) to disown my brother and I, as well as his brothers. He basically told everyone who would listen that we were not his kids and that he was ashamed of us. It was a tough time, especially due to the fact that I was graduating high school at the time and did not have time for this, I was starting my degree at The University of Ottawa going back to the place I had always dreamed of going back to and my brother being younger took a different route to handling this stuff. He threw himself into his sports as a means of working out his anger. My mom was just as mad as we were and threatened to take him to court over it. Which was all that I needed to direct my desire to law. I wanted children to grow up with fair opportunities and not what happened to me because that was not fair. I would never put anyone through that and it was one of my deepest and darkest moments. I fell into a depression and thought about ending it all over the next few years, I still feel this way some days but thanks to medicine and therapy I have recovered to such a way that I know I can handle whatever is thrown at me. I refused to become like my father had called us, failures. I wanted to succeed and show him that we were not his children, we were a product of love and life and exactly what my mother had raised us to be. I would not be my fathers daughter and would not let him dictate my life. That was until he got cancer. When he was diagnosed with cancer and told it was serious we reconciled and he apologised for everything. I told him how I felt and so did my brother and we were there for him through everything. My brother has since had a falling out again with my father over who knows what but I've stayed strong and tried to ensure our relationship was better. So as he lays in a hospital bed with no loved ones around I am forced to be the one who takes time off to be with him. I explained to Kyle what was the case and he granted me a few days off saying that the boys will be okay without me and all he asked was that I keep my phone on incase. He offered me his assistance and counselling through the organization but I had graciously declined his offer saying that it was okay and that everything would work out. It was a line I had told myself all the time throughout the years as a means to keep my head on straight. I give my fathers sleeping form a kiss on the head and step out of the room when my phone rings a third time.
"What could it possibly be?" I hissed not even thinking to look at the caller ID.
"Is that anyway to greet your Daddy?" Jason asks and my stomach drops.
"I'm so sorry Jason, I just was in the middle of studying and I didn't see who was calling and wasn't thinking." I ramble on.
"It's okay little one, I'm just calling to see how you're doing. The boys miss you around here but we know school is so important."
"It's okay, I'm just working on my case study and trying to figure everything out so that I can get back to you soon." Or get back to my father whatever is best.
"Good girl, I'm so proud of you." My eyes fill with tears when he says that and I quickly brush them away.
"You're proud?" I ask not believing my ears.
"Of course Celestria. You make me proud every single day I see you and even when I don't. Your dedication to everyone is one I admire."
"You have no idea how much I needed that." I cry letting tears slip down my face.
"Hey, hey what's going on in that head?"
"Nothing, I'm just really stressed." I lie and grimace at how it came out.
"Celestria, you know how we take to lying."
"I know, I promise I'm not lying. I'm fine, Jason I promise."
"Okay, as long as you're sure." He doesn't sound convinced and I'm not sure I'm even sure that I'm telling the truth, am I really okay? My father is getting worse and worse the more I spend with him and I'm trying to get him moved to Toronto so I can come more but it's hard to get him a bed at St. Mikes.
"I promise."
"Okay, well I just wanted to call to hear your voice and make sure you're not in need of anything."
"I am okay. Thank you, the only thing I need is to not be stressed but the sooner I get it done the sooner I can get back to work and be around you boys."
"We'd love that, I can promise that the arena isn't nearly as nice without you."
"I know and I miss wearing my collar."
"You haven't been wearing it?!" He asks, sounding angry and I just about shit my pants thinking about the punishment I'll get for this.
"I just don't want to get it dirty is all."
"That's not good enough Celestria, I can't be there to physically punish you but I want you to write a letter explaining why you felt that you didn't need to wear the collar and I expect you to read it to us the next time you're here okay?"
"Yes sir." I whisper, my voice getting low as the thought of adding something to my plate makes me sick.
"You are to wear it at all times."
"It's hard though when I'm home with family, I can't wear it because they can't know what I actually do:"
"Okay Well, I understand that. I guess we will have to rectify the situation in some way so you can wear something to show ownership but without wearing your actual collar. I'll talk to the boys about that."
"Thank you Jason."
"You're welcome my darling. I have to go as I just got back to the arena for the game but I want to say I miss you and I am thinking of you okay?"
"Thank you, I'll be back for the game on Monday. I'm flying out that morning to meet you guys in LA. I miss you guys, more than I think anyone can ever miss people."
"Trust me, I've had to listen to many men in their twenties go on about how much they miss their sub around."
"Really they miss you?"
"Yes more than you understand I think."
"That makes me feel good."
"It should." He chuckles. "Alright, talk later Celestria. Enjoy studying."
"Thanks Jase, I'll talk to you later."
"Alright, I'll see you soon."
"See you." I hang up my phone and lean against the wall letting tears run down my face. 'Pull yourself together Celestria. You can do this!' I try to psych myself up but cannot bring myself to stop crying. I go for a walk to the Tim Hortons, convinced it'll make me feel better and that I'll be able to think once I get my coffee but even that I don't think will help me. Once I do the same path I've taken many times in the past two days and get my coffee I can take a deep breath and figure out my next moves. I'm just about to take my first sip of my coffee when my phone goes off again. I answered again.
"Hello?" I ask.
"Hey Celestria, it's Marcus. How's dad doing?" My brother's deep voice comes through the speaker of my phone.
"You'd know if you even came to see him. But if you have to know he's okay. He's having surgery again soon and I'm still trying to get him to St. Mikes but the wait is so long and I worry he doesn't have that." I hear my brother sigh and I let my eyes close as I sit down at a bench in the lobby of the hospital.
"Cel, you know I can't. Not after what happened, we haven't forgotten that. I can't!"
"But why? Do you not remember what he did to me? He's still our father and he's dying."
"I know, I know. I'll figure something out."
"You need to come. Take the train, I'll pay for it and pick you up at Ottawa station."
"Okay, I'll be there as soon as I can. How are you holding up?"
"I'm barely holding it together if I'm honest. I've never had such a hard time and I would not wish this on anyone. I'm just grateful everyone at work is understanding."
"Do they know about dad?"
"No they don't and I'd appreciate it if they didn't. I don't need the pity."
"Have you ever thought that they could help you?"
"I don't need the help. I can handle it myself."
"No you can't."
"Yes I can Marcus, I've handled worse."
"Yes but not alone. I'm not there and neither is mom. What you're dealing with is you only and that's hard."
"I know." I sigh, taking a sip of my coffee. "My only saving Grace is that the coffee here is always made right." He laughs.
"Of course, the coffee is always good."
"That's not true, it sometimes sucks."
"True. Well you know that hospital like the back of your hand now I guess."
"It's the only hospital I went to when I lived here so I know it pretty well."
"Have you told anyone you're there?"
"I told Erika and Sarah. We're going to get together soon, I'm rooming with Erika for the time being. I mean the whole sorority thing comes in handy sometimes."
"Sometimes. Are they hot?"
"You know what they look like loser. They're more feminist than I am."
"Alright, never mind then."
"Stick to country bitches. These small town girls have big city ideals."
"Too much for me. Fucking snowflakes."
"Yep." I roll my eyes at my brother. For someone who was raised in a city he sure has small brain ideals.
"I'll let you go, I just wanted to call and see how you were doing."
"Thanks brother. I appreciate it."
"No problem Sis, I'll see you soon."
"Yep, just get here when you can so you two can patch up before he goes for surgery and gets worse."
"I will, just give me time."
"Time is dwindling. You have to come now."
"I know I know, talk soon. Ill text you when I get my plans figured out. Stay strong sis."
"Thanks bro, ill try my best." I say my goodbyes and sit on the bench with my head down. I pray to every God and Goddess out there that my father will come out of this alive but even I know that may be more difficult than I want to think is possible.
Aus: Celestria, how's school going?
Celestria: Aus! It's good. I am trying to get this all done so I can join you soon.
Aus: We'd like that. I've been missing your face around here.
Celestria: So I've heard. Jason just called me.
Aus: Did he? That was nice of him to do that.
Celestria: You know him being my main Daddy and everything.
Aus: That's true. Once a Daddy, always a Daddy. When are you planning on coming back to work? We were thinking of having you over for dinner one night at Willy's. It would just be Ras, Will and I but that shouldn't be a problem?
Celestria: Nope. I don't see why not. I'm free Thursday when we get home from out west? I'm set to rejoin the team on Monday in LA.
Aus: Exciting! We cannot wait as you've probably heard so many times already. Willy and I should be good with that. Let me ask him but I'm sure it's not a problem. How is everything? Did you need a study buddy?
Celestria: I am far too busy to have a buddy but I appreciate it more than you know. I am actually not even home. I'm staying with a classmate for the duration of our project. We just mesh together well and figured that it would be best.
Aus: That's so smart. Is that why you're in Ottawa right now? Care to explain that.
Fuck! How does he know that?! Shit my Snapchat? Did I really not turn that off?
Celestria: How do you know I'm in Ottawa.
Aus: Your snap maps are on. You're lucky it was me that told you and not Jason. If he found out, you'd be in so much trouble.
Celestria: Thank you. I'm gonna go turn it off now. I'm in Ottawa with a friend who's helping me right now. And yeah, Jason is already on my ass about me not being able to wear my collar while im away so I don't need him on my case anymore.
Aus: You're not wearing your collar?
Celestria: I can't. With my family and friends it's far too large for me to explain.
Aus: Oh, that makes sense. Well we will have to find something for you to wear while with family.
Celestria: That's what Jason said.
Aus: We never really planned it through I guess.
Celestria: What did you ask your other Sub to do?
Aus: You're the first team one. Things got bad and so Kyle decided it was best if we had one and that's where you came in. Which if I may add, is the best thing to ever happen to us.
Celestria: Aww stop! You're making me blush.
Aus: Good. That's my job, I did it correctly. I can't make you do it in person so over text is going to do. Can I get a selfie of your pretty face?
Celestria: One second! Of course you can.
I pull my mask off quickly and snap a photo before repositioning it and sending it to him. Before I send my photo I take a look at myself. My eyes look dull and lifeless and my chin looks extra fat today. I look awful but I send it anyways.
Celestria: *attached one photo* There you are sir. One photo of a stressed Law school student.
Aus: Beautiful, if you were here I'd take the stress away.
As if he could really do that.
Celestria: I'd love that. I am a ball of stress right now.
Aus: I promise I will do whatever it takes to make you feel better.
Celestria: I'd like that please?
Aus: I promise. Come see me when you get to LA and I'll do what I can.
Celestria: Aus, thank you.
Aus: You're welcome Celestria.
I close my eyes and lean against the cool glass, giving myself a moment to relax and decompress which seems to be rare for me these days. Between school, the boys and now my father I can't seem to catch a break.
Auston's POV
"Buddy, I was thinking. Celeste trusts you and we've both been stressed. How about we ask her to scene together this Thursday at dinner?" Will asks as we're heading down the tunnel for warmups.
"You think she'd go for it?" I ask bending down to stretch my back.
"I'm sure she would. You said she's been stressed right? This might be the right thing to calm her down."
"I like the idea. She's been so stressed with school that I don't think she's had a proper scene in a few weeks. It may do her some good to have some down time."
"Okay good, we'll ask her at dinner and then we can do it on Friday at the arena?"
"That sounds good to me." Mitch taps us all on the shin pads and off we go to the game. Something feels different though and I believe it has to do with one special girl who has stolen the hearts of us all within such a short amount of time.
After the game we're all sitting around shooting the shit when Jason stands up to address us.
"Boys! I was thinking and when I was talking to Celestria she was saying how hard it is to wear her collar in public and around her family. I already corrected her today for it but I was thinking that we need to get her something else for her to wear like a cuff or a necklace." He says.
"I like the cuff idea, something simple that looks like a bracelet but that only we can take off." I say piping in with my two cents.
"Should we do silver or gold?"
"I think Silver. It matches her aesthetic and our jerseys. When it matches like that I think she would appreciate it and we can get the leaf and TML on it. Something that shows us." John says, putting in his two cents as well. Others agree around us and we end up shopping on the Cartier website not too long later and finding a simple silver cuff that we can inscribe with what we needed. She is going to be the best decorated Sub in the league and she is going to wear it with pride and dignity.
"Done, it's ordered. She'll love it."
"Should we give it to her on Monday?" Jason shakes his head.
"It won't be at my house until at least Wednesday. We can do it when we get back on Friday morning." John and Morgan both nod their heads in agreement.
"I think it's good if we do it then. She will like it and it may be the pick me up that she needs." I say. "Look, she looks exhausted." I pass my phone around with the photo she sent me. The boys faces differ between sadness and anger at how tired she looks.
"She doesn't look like she's been taking care of herself." Jack says passing the phone onto Fred who has the same reaction as the rest.
"No she definitely hasn't been."
"Should we do something?" I shake my head just as Jason nods.
"No we can't. She doesn't want us around at the moment, it would be for the best if we didn't."
"Okay but we need to."
"We don't need to, she is going to be okay."
"Auston, she needs us."
"What she needs is to be away and doing school which is what she wants." Jason looks at me with anger but I stand my ground.
"What do you know? Is she hiding something?"
"No, all I'm saying is she's not having a good time right now with school and the best thing for us to do is just be there for her and she will let us know when she needs us. She's old enough to take care of herself."
"She's my little."
"And she's my sub. My point is that she needs to take care of herself, Jason. We cannot always be there for you when she has a problem. I know she can handle herself, trust me." He sighs and shrugs.
"Fine, if you are so sure about it. I just want to make sure she is okay."
"I know, she means so much to all of us." Jason nods and looks at the photo and grimaces before handing it back to me.
"You better be right. If she is not okay there's going to be a lot of issues not only with us but also with her."
"She's a sweet baby, I just worry that she is not doing well and is not telling us." Jack says quietly observing what is going on.
"There's something else going on that we don't know and that she is not telling us."
"I know, we don't know though and we cannot ask her to open up to us if she is not ready to do so." John says from his stall.
"She will tell us when she is ready to tell us."