-Y/n POV-
"What the bloody hell do you think you're doing?" I say, ripping my hands free from his. I'm pinned against the door while he just stares down at me, slightly out of breath. I quickly push past, not wanting to be in such a position.
"We need to talk"
"We already are"
"Y/n. Please. I want to talk to you." Blaise huffs, clearly frustrated. His eyes pierced into mine as if it was his way of asking permission. It's been weeks since I've stopped all contact with him, hoping I would completely forget everything. Of course, I had no such luck.
I had wished that maybe it was just a matter of wrong timing- that his words were merely frauds hiding behind a pureblooded mask. However, little insulting quips about blood status and my family's name from Pansy and Draco whenever I passed by said otherwise. What had hurt more was Blaise would laugh in agreement, as if he was providing a foundation for the insults to stand upon. Looking at him now- pleading with me to converse a few words after everything, made it seem so comical. Was he not embarrassed? I never thought he would stoop to the low level of being a two faced twat.
Curiosity did, unfortunately, get the best of me, as I felt my head slowly tilt and a brow quirked- my wordless way of saying I was listening. He almost seemed too happy to talk, swallowing to fight back that shit-eating smile.
"You must know, what I said had no truth behind it." He begins. "Neither do I agree with anything Pansy and Draco had said."
"Then why say it." I state quickly, almost cutting him off. I had not the slightest idea how to react. However I did know one thing- I wasn't one to fall for pity excuses.
"Y/n come on, you are more than aware how my family is. How most of my house is too." He replied.
I scoffed, slightly lifted my posture and stared at him, eyes unfazed. It will never seize to surprise me how the wizarding world still cared about whether you had a drop of muggle blood or not.
"So tell me Zabini, does blood status matter to you?" I questioned coldly.
He stood there, shocked, as if I caught him off guard. When he opened his mouth to reply, the only thing that came out were hesitant stutters, barely enough words to form a proper answer. Lucky for him, I was feeling patient today and gave him another moment before opening my mouth again. "It's a 'yes' or 'no' type of question Blaise. It's not that hard."
As expected, he said nothing. His eyebrows was knitted together and his eyes not being able to settle on one place to focus on- he looked as if he was fighting a war within himself. Somehow, even though I had an expectation to what his answer would be to that question, it still cut deep. It still managed to pull on my heartstrings and make my heart ache. And I hated it.
After a decent amount of minutes in silence pass by, my patience runs out. "I'm leaving" I say, pushing pass him, hand on the knob of the door, seconds away from turning it.
A cold hand is quick to grab my wrist. Tight enough for me not to rip out of, yet gentle enough for it to not hurt. I turn around and am met by him, a few feet away- definitely closer than he was before, staring at me with pleading eyes. "No it doesn't matter. I couldn't care less over some dumb title" he finally answers.
He seemed to take a breath in before he continued. "The only thing I seem to care about these days is...you."
My breath hitches. What the fuck is happening?
"It would be unfair for me to ask you for forgiveness, and I don't expect you to grant it either." He took a small, gentle step towards me, regret lacing his words. "But I don't think I can go another day without you being in my life" His hand slowly taking mine and interlacing it with his. I stood still, chest rising with every breath. He was closer now, a mere arm's length away. With his thumb carefully grazing my hand as he shortens the distance between us and stares down at me. His rich smell of citrus blossoms, figs and vanilla soon becomes prominent and I found myself basking in the scent.
He wasn't a typically romantic one, wasn't one to claim love. So this was the closest thing to it.
Looking up, I was met with his deep brown eyes already studying me. His hand raising and gently resting on my cheek, his fingers lightly brushing against my neck. A shiver shot through my spine. Heart fluttering, I lean into his touch. "I missed you y/n" he whispers. His grip on my cheek slightly tightening as he lifts my chin upwards, caressing it. A small smile forms before he speaks again. "If only you knew the things you do to me." He starts to lower himself down, hovering over me as his gaze shifted to my lips. He looked hesitant.
Then reality hits like a ton of bricks. What am I doing. What is HE doing. Repeating his words in my head, my frustration starts to build.
My eyes turn cold, body stiffening. What did this scum take me for? Did he really think he could say a few sweet words and I would drop to my knees, gushing over him? He doesn't think I'm that fucking dumb does he?
I step back, smacking away his hand- it seems to catch him off guard. "What type of sick game are you playing at Zabini?" I spit out, still moving away from him. "So what? You fancy me now is that it?" I taunt.
He stood still, eyes watching my every movement, yet said nothing- probably too shocked to do so.
"You put me and the ones I care about through WEEKS of absolute hell. And now this? Are you fucking kidding me?" I say, voice getting louder and harsher. I couldn't care less.
"Y/n I never said anythi-" "But you stood by them you twat!" He visibly scowled at the insult and tightened his jaw.
A few moments of silence pass by, both of us trying to figure out what to say next. I never quite knew how tiring it was to pretend something didn't effect you, and one can only handle so much. And before I knew it, my emotions get the best of me.
"Just so you know Blaise, I genuinely enjoyed those times we spent together. And perhaps, for a moment, I thought that you felt the same way I did." I sighed, and looked directly at him before continuing. "You made me feel heard, loved even."
"But then I hear you talking crap behind my back. And you continue to do it for weeks. And now you claim you 'missed me'?" I pause to breathe. I will certainly not cry in-front of him. "It was stupid of me to think that I was something more to you. Unbelievably stupid."
I try by best to frown, try my best to look angry but nonetheless, my efforts go wasted. My mask was worn out and I was left vulnerable.
"Y/n pleas-" "Did you intend to hurt me? If you did then congratulations Blaise, just like everything you do, you excelled in it." I give an empty chuckle at the end. "I hope whatever reasoning you did it for was worth it."
"You weren't stupid." Blaise's unsteady voice cuts through. "I do fancy you, the same way you fancy me." He takes a deep breath, and levels his gazes with mine. "And I can say for certain that you are something more to me, more than words can possibly describe."
I froze. Heart pounding rapidly. I wanted to give in, to forget. But sometimes, words aren't enough.
"Then prove it. And not just by trying to kiss me."
He stands there, rooted in the floor, mouth slightly agape, lips having a slight tremble to it. If it wasn't for the murkiness of the room we were in, I could've sworn I saw a tear slip down his eye. But I was too tired to care.
Walking towards the door, I opened it, walked out only to bump into by a coincidentally Draco and Pansy walking by and seeing the situation unfold. He held me against the collar of my robe and brought me in-front of Blaise for questioning. I barely resisted, apart of me curious to see if Blaise was truly sorry, if he truly did love me. "Why were two together?" Draco asked, death glares sent to the Italian boy front of him.
I looked at Blaise, anticipating an answer. He fidgets and tightens his jaw. His gaze turns cold and he responds, clear as day.
"I was simply telling her to leave me alone."
Flashes of instant regret spread across his face, eyes darting to me as a way of signaling that he didn't mean it. As if he subconsciously had said it. I didn't care. My heart ached and I felt weak. It took every bit of my remaining strength to not scream at him. To not break down in tears. To not rat him out. And I prevailed.
Ripping out of Draco's grip and steadying myself, I glare at Zabini's eyes.
"Gladly."
I turn around and walk straight to my common room, not bothering to look back.