Damn.
She is gorgeous.
Her features are soft, her skin creamy. I watch as her eyes grow wide and I note that they are green. The beautiful kind of green. The green that makes her look like some sort of a goddess. And her mouth. It looks like a little cupid's bow, the upper lip a little thin but with a plump lower lip. It's perfect. I try not to smile like an idiot.
She removes her beanie, and her hair looks so soft and so black. It is a little bunched up at the top, but it looks cute on her. I suddenly have an intense urge to run my fingers through it.
Whoa, you creep. Slow down. You don't even know her name.
But damn, is she gorgeous.
Amy steps aside and I smile a little because I was right—she is wearing a skirt.
"Hey Lily," Amy says. Lily. Even her name is beautiful. And I don't want to sound like a pompous guy, but she's looking at me with that look of shock on her face that pretty much translates she wants me in my brain, and it doesn't make sense at all but she. Is. Gorgeous.
Lily doesn't seem to hear her. She's still looking at me, and I'm looking right back at her. It has been a long time since I've felt like this, and my heart starts beating faster. It's almost as if it starts beating happier, if you get what I mean. Plus, I don't mind her looking at me at all. She can look at me all day. I won't complain.
Amy raises an eyebrow and snaps her fingers in front of Lily's face. She blinks and her eyes find her roommate, and I am slightly disappointed because she isn't looking at me anymore, which is real mature, I know.
Come on, Lily, look at me again.
She does look at me, for a split second, then moves over to Amy. She licks her lips and smiles, but I can immediately tell that the smile is fake. It makes me frown, and I sit up straighter on Amy's bed. Something's bothering her, and I want to take it away, for some reason.
"Hey Amy," Lily says in a quiet, croaky voice. She clears her throat and runs her hands down her skirt. My eyes follow her movements, my frown deepening. Why is she so anxious?
The (over)confident part of me insists that she's anxious because I am in the room, that she's nervous because of me. It pretty much doesn't matter what I think, though, because the anxiety and nervousness in my chest is exactly because she is in the room.
"You forgot your keys?" Amy asks, and Lily nods.
"I didn't know you had company," Lily says, her voice much clearer now. Her eyes dart toward me again, but they don't stay for long, which kind of makes me feel a tiny bit frustrated.
Amy shakes her head and ushers Lily in. I stand, towering over the two, and it's insane how beautiful she is the closer she gets to me. Still she refuses to look again at me, and I suddenly feel like I'm invisible. It is not a good feeling.
I send telepathic waves to Amy, willing her to introduce me to her roommate. It doesn't seem to work, since Amy keeps chatting with Lily, seeming to forget that I am in their room, too. I want to conk one of my so-called best friends on the head, but the timing isn't favoring me. I settle for clearing my throat, and Amy almost jumps. Lily, however, still has her eyes firmly trained on everywhere but me. I fight the urge to tear my hair out. I settle on running a hand through it instead.
"Is something wrong with your throat?" Amy asks as she faces me, a smirk lighting up her face. Obviously she has now gotten the fact that I would like to be introduced to her incredibly beautiful roommate, and her smirk says I'm-going-to-tease-you-for-little-bit-before-I-introduce-you.
I am mentally conking Amy on the head. I give her a tight-lipped smile and say, "Nope."
"But it doesn't sound too good when you clear it." Amy blinks innocently, but I know an Amy who aims to annoy when I see one. I narrow my eyes slightly and her face looks like she almost let out a laugh, but she's able to hold it in. Lily stays quiet, her boots having seem to fascinate her.
With an eye roll, Amy finally looks at Lily and says, "Lily, this is Matthew Johnson. Matty, this is Lily Jones."
She then turns back to me and mouths, happy now? and I nod, one corner of my mouth lifting up. I hold out a hand to Lily and she raises her eyebrows, finally looking at me (though her eyes dart around every few seconds or so), before slowly slipping her hand into mine.
Her hand is warm, despite the coolness that surrounds us, and it fits so perfectly in mine that I don't want to let go. I give her a small smile.
"Hi, Lily."
My voice cracks a little, and as I catch Amy's eye, even for a brief second, it is obvious she is trying not to laugh. She stands behind Lily and covers her throat with both hands, sticking her tongue out. Apparently she is making fun of my voice cracking like a boy hitting puberty.
Lily clears her throat and says, "Hi, Matty."
My name on her lips? If there is a masculine term for swooning, that will be an appropriate description to what I am feeling.
One corner of my mouth lifts up again. "Pleasure."
Lily blinks, and a pinkish tinge pops up on her cheeks. My smile grows wider, despite the growing mixture of emotions inside my stomach. Dang, she is adorable.
I never, ever say dang, but this is a moment that calls for it.
"You guys might want to stop holding hands now," Amy pipes up. With that, Lily flinches and withdraws her hand, leaving mine noticeably empty. I shoot daggers at my so-called-friend and she just shrugs and grins.
"Sorry, Amy," Lily mutters. "I had no idea you have your boyfriend here with you. I'll just get my keys and leave."
I think me and Amy are both so stunned, we gawk at Lily for a moment before Amy lets out a sound that make it seem like she's choking.
"B-boy-f-friend?" Amy sputters, while I just stare at Lily. "You think Matty is my boyfriend?"
I would have been offended with the degree of horror in her voice if I am not feeling the exact same thing. The idea of Amy being my girlfriend sends my stomach into a very dizzying rollercoaster ride.
"Lily," Amy continues in a much steadier voice. "Matty is not my boyfriend, and he never will be my boyfriend."
Lily's eyebrows rise, and I think I see her eyes sparkle a little. Then she frowns and turns to Amy, leans in and whispers something in her ear. Amy blinks at her and then almost doubles over in laughter. I smile as I see Lily blush a bright red. She looks adorable.
"H-he's," Amy says between laughs, visibly struggling to speak. I poke her side and she jolts, glaring at me, and then rushes out, "Heisnotgay."
My mouth falls open slightly as I look at Lily, causing her cheeks to turn even redder. "You think I'm gay?"
Lily opens her mouth and closes it, at loss for words. She then shrugs and says, "Look at her. Who wouldn't want to be her boyfriend?"
As Amy coos and gushes at how sweet Lily is, I think to myself as my eyes still are trained on Lily, her question completely forgotten, look at you.
"I'm not gay," I say over Amy's gushing. Lily's gaze finds me, and I smile softly at her. "I like women. Except Amy."
"Gee, thanks," Amy says sarcastically as she shoves me with her hip. "I like men. Except Matty."
Lily nods slowly, the corners of her mouth quirking. My heart suddenly thuds faster against my rib cage. Why does it seem like everything that this girl does is adorable?
"Okay, I get it now." Lily finally lets out a smile, and I swear I feel like I have frozen and melted at the same time.
If she is beautiful with her hair bunched up from wearing a hat, her eyes wide with disbelief and shock, and her mouth open, she is absolutely breathtaking when she smiles.
And I know that if I get the direct receiving end of that smile, I'll be knocked off my feet.
I have never felt like this ever since Dianne, and surprisingly the thought does not sting.
"Soooo," Amy drawls out and it is only then I realize that I am still staring at Lily, and Miss Gorgeous is shifting awkwardly from one foot to another. Like what I've said, adorable.
"Keys?" Amy offers, and smiles widely at Lily. Lily nods and she steps toward her bed, and I thank my lucky stars because she has to pass by me to get to her bed and maybe she will even brush my arm or something.
I know I am acting like a boy who has just gotten his first crush, but I don't care. It feels good to feel like this again. As dramatic as it may sound, I never think of feeling this with someone else but Dianne. It even took a while for me to feel this way about my ex-girlfriend. With Lily, though, it is like I can't help myself. Like it's my natural reaction to her.
It does feel good but there's a little bit of fear in there somewhere. At this moment though, the goodness outweighs the fear.
Still this feeling is filling me up quite fast, and I know I have to slow down. After all, I would not want to scare Lily or anything. And as much as I want to let go of Dianne, I haven't entirely yet. I am still hanging by a thread.
And as Lily brushes past me, a thought enters my head as my heart rate picks up. Lily can easily snap that thread; that I am almost completely sure of.
As I stand there with my thoughts, I barely notice Lily brushing past me again, and she is already at the door. I clear my throat.
"Want to get something to eat?"
Lily stops and stares at me. I feel like wacking my head against the wall. Did I just burst that out? That is not my smoothest move. Amy, again, is trying hard not to burst out laughing. I decide to ignore her.
Might as well make the best of it. I shrug one shoulder and smile at Lily while willing the embarrassment swimming in my stomach to go away.
"I know a great barbecue place."