We drove together in Robert's car. I didn't have any other choice.
My loyal Ford Fiesta had been totaled. Gone. I supposed it was time, but I couldn't help but feel sad.
The rhythmic vibration of Robert's car engine lured me into another shallow sleep. It had been extremely easy for me to fall asleep since the accident, unlike before. Maybe my body had decided to use this as an excuse to take a long-overdue break.
The last month at work had been excruciating. I had been blamed for not one, but several big and small issues that, from my perspective, weren't at all my fault. My insomnia had gotten worse. My dad just told me to 'toughen up' whenever I called him. He seemed to have all the problems in the world to deal with these days, so he hardly had time for one more.
I knew I should have called him the day before or this morning to let him know that I was safe, but I had not wanted to. The truth was I had not known how.
Our last conversation had not gone so well. My dad had kept pestering me about 'the future', where I would get out of my dead-end job and settle down with one of many guys he had introduced. It had been torturous. Vince used to be the one who got an earful, but he was always gone these days...
Our car got to Main Street. Piles of stuff that got destroyed the night before spread to the end of the street and beyond the intersection. Once in a while, a lone plastic bag or a piece of paper flew in the wind. The scene was oddly serene in an apocalyptic way. The sun had risen above the clouds, but the city still looked gloomy. At least, it had survived another day.
There was not a soul on the street even when it was already past 9 am. Life had taken a strange turn. I tried to call reception at my office, but no one answered. I thought of calling my boss, but after last night, I didn't think anyone would show up for work today. Definitely not me.
I checked my reflection in the visor. I looked like hell. My face was swollen, black and blue. Heavy bags formed under my eyes and the bandage around my head gave me a unique look.
Robert turned to watch me once in a while without giving any comment. The atmosphere in the car was weird, but it could've been worse. I thought of our trip to the lake when we had just started dating...
"What's next?" I asked, rubbing my clammy hands on my jeans. Robert's gaze started to make me a little uneasy.
"My project files are still on my computer at the office. I should've transferred it to my laptop last week when I came in..." Robert backed the car into a parking spot, then turned on the blinker. It was a habit. There was no one around.
Robert mumbled something to himself then leaned forward to tighten his shoelaces.
"Be right back," he said and grabbed his laptop bag.
Since the accident yesterday, I had been paranoid. At any moment, I imagined a giant bus could fly out of nowhere and T-bone me again. I wanted to cling to Robert's sleeve and beg him not to go, but I refrained from doing that.
I watched him leave for the building. It was a large and ominous structure. A giant beast made of concrete and steel with a gigantic mouth.
Robert's company was a middle-scale one, but it had been competing with much larger corporations for years. Before the Federation was in power, no one had even heard of QLSolutions, but with the rise of General Castillon and his associates, the company had become a household name. The rumor was General Castillon had a sizeable investment in the company, but no one could provide concrete proof.
I had thought Robert would leave the company for good after the accident, but he had never done so.
Life had not been kind to him. At the age of five, Robert had lost both of his parents. His grandparents had taken custody of him for a few years before they also passed away. After that, it had been endless back and forth between relatives. None of them had been too enthusiastic to take in the orphaned boy.
Robert had moved to his uncle's farm next to ours during my last year of middle school. Every day I could hear his uncle shouting at him, ordering him around from the crack of dawn to when he was ready for school. Then the same thing when he got back. Somehow, with all the verbal abuse, hard labor, and not nearly enough time or energy for anything else, Robert'd still finished school and gotten himself into college with a full scholarship.
It had taken him a while to find this job after graduating. Robert was one of the company's chemical engineers. One night, he had gotten called in due to an emergency. That was when it happened...
Nothing stayed the same, including our relationship.
Robert would take me back to Oakheart County, where our family's farm was, today since I didn't want to stay one more minute in the city by myself. I also couldn't continue staying at his place. Staring at each other with nothing to talk about would kill me faster than any injury.
Vince had agreed to come back. I just hoped my brother was already at the farm.
I didn't even turn when I heard the car door shut and clothes rustling next to me. Now was not a good time to reminisce, especially in my state of mind. I opened the glove compartment and went through its minimal content just to have something to do. The silence felt like insects under my skin.
"How long has it been?" Robert suddenly asked while cranking up the heater.
I didn't even register the question. His voice was low, and he stared at something outside instead of me. I continued digging through the glove compartment.
"How long has it been, Lou?" Robert said it again, this time louder.
His eyes were on me. The question was definitely for me.