JoJo's Bizarre Group Chat

Por friedbreads

2.4K 54 162

jonathan makes a group chat it goes badly Más

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JOFOES I
JOFOES II
XXXIX
BONUS III
BONUS IV
XXXX
XXXXI
~Giorno vs Jodio~
BONUS V
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LVI
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LIX
LX
LXI
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LXXVII
LXXVIII
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LXXX
LXXXI
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LXXXVIII
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LXXXVII
LXXXVIII
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XC
XCI
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XCIV
XCV
XCVI
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XCVIII
XCIX
C
CI
CII
FINALE
EPILOGUE
Final Score!

XV

29 1 1
Por friedbreads

big balls johnson: what's up morons, i'm out of the hospital

dead man: that's a little aggressive i feel like

Strire Daits: you were in the hospital for 2 months?

big balls johnson: shhhh

Ogres are like onions: he was begging me to suck him off

Star Finger: Strire Daits: you were in the hospital for 2 months?

You're welcome

big balls johnson: i was not begging you to suck me off tf???

Ogres are like onions: you sure?

big balls johnson: ...

big balls johnson: it was only once

kiss my hair: koichi's been begging me to suck him off too

dead man: i need you

Yukako <3: >:((((

trash can: im going to assume and hope you didn't suck him off

dead man: he did it was great

kiss my hair: no i didn't you shitbag

dead man: lying?? shawshee

David Bowie: What the fuck is shawshee?

big balls johnson: oh you don't know???

baseball: why are we talking about oral sex im only a kid

ZA HANDO: still the same height as koichi

dead man: hey >:(

dead man changed their name to josuke's secret admirer

kiss my hair: koichi buddy, it's not very secret if you tell everyone

big balls johnson: koichi has a sigma male grindset you have to respect it

trash can: how so?

big balls johnson: no matter how many times your crush rejects you, continue to beg them to fuck you

furg: I think that's the mindset of a rapist

Ogres are like onions: more the mindset of an incel

kiss my hair: kira lmao

David Bowie: Cocksucker.

josuke's secret admirer: he sucks my cock

kiss my hair muted josuke's secret admirer

trash can: praise the lord

Jona: hello everyone

my dad's gay: hiiiiii

idont<3jolyne: is your dad actually gay

frog rain: lmao is that even a question you have to ask

my dad's gay: how about we ask him

my dad's gay: yo @Star Finger u gay?

Star Finger: absolutely not

SMACK: 🧢

COCKyoin: i feel i should've been informed of this sooner

Ogres are like onions: 🐍

COCKyoin: fuck off

Ogres are like onions: oh look out, prince harry's had a couple drinks and now he thinks he's hard

COCKyoin: i am hard

Ogres are like onions: what, so brown-nosing everyone is just an act is it

COCKyoin: i don't brown-nose anyone

big balls johnson: you do a bit

COCKyoin: good manners cost nothing

Jona: stop fighting >:(

Chad with a gun: we don't talk about bruno no no no

oreng: weee dontr ralktalk aboout brueunoooooo

Mama Bear: ????

Mama Bear: what did i do?

Star Finger: it's a movie, ignore them

Chad with a gun: yeah but... is it thoug

oreng: ekssactlyk whatt ive been sayijgnting

SMACK: it literally is a film wtf

Star Finger: A BAD ONE

Ogres are like onions: capssss

big balls johnson: i thought you weren't gonna do this anymore

COCKyoin: wait jojo you don't like it?

Star Finger: YOU HAVE FORCED ME TO WATCH IT

Star Finger: TWENTY TWO TIMES

Star Finger: AND YES I COUNTED

Star Finger: I DONT CARE WHY WE DONT TALK ABOUT BRUNO NO NO NO

Star Finger: OR HOW DRIPPY THE PRESSURE IS

big balls johnson: 'drippy' lol

Mama Bear: wait what did i do

Star Finger: PLEASE CAN WE WATCH SOMETHING DIFFERENT

DIO: like hamilton

Ice Ice Baby: or the greatest showman

DIO: both at the same time

Star Finger: NOOOOOOOO

DIO changed Star Finger's name to Anal-ander Cramiton

Anal-ander Cramilton: NO

COCKyoin: wait so you don't want every encanto song played at the same time at our wedding?

Anal-ander Cramilton: DO I LOOK LIKE THE KIND OF BITCHASS MOTHERFUCKER WHO WOULD

Anal-ander Cramilton left the chat

DIO: far too much cramming

French: bro that fucking name im dying xd

DIO: did you just unironically say xd

French: yeh and?

DIO: you sicken me

DIO: prepare to hold a fat l

French: no..?

DIO: a fucking sickeningly huge l is coming your way

French: right what exactly does that entail

DIO: oh so many fucking things bro

DIO: just- absolutely despicable amounts of things

whop nea nea: ignore him polnareff he aint gon do shit

Ice Ice Baby: :)

whop nea nea: :(

dogchamp: dio sus

DIO: wtf did you just say

frog rain: pretty clear no? He said dio sus

DIO: well i wasn't expecting to kill another dog

Jona: >:(

big balls johnson: you won't no balls

trash can: wait is koichi still muted?

trash can: that's a record

ZA HANDO: i thought yukako was force feeding him oatmeal

kiss my hair: yeah, jona hasn't noticed that i muted him yet

my dad's gay: >:)

kiss my hair: what's that for

my dad's gay: @Jona

my dad's gay: @Jona

my dad's gay: @Jona

Ogres are like onions: new member of the snake club??

big balls johnson: bruh all those options and you chose snake club

Ogres are like onions: oh yeah why don't you give them one

big balls johnson: idk the vile vyperz

French: pfffft ahahahahahaha

COCKyoin: that's literally the worst thing i've ever read

DIO: how i feel about ur mom

Jona: wait who @ed me?

my dad's gay: meeeee

Jona: oh why

kiss my hair: no reason

kiss my hair: she did it for no reason

Jona: oh josuke muted koichi 🤔

kiss my hair: jolyne wtf 😬

Jona unmuted josuke's secret admirer

Jona: there you go <)

kiss my hair: shiiii

josuke's secret admirer: joooooosuke ;)

kiss my hair: so sus

trash can: ✋ 🙄

Jona: i dont get a thank you? :(

DIO: nah of course you dont ya little bitch

whop nea nea: dio is being aggressive today

David Bowie: What and he isn't normally?

whop nea nea: *especially aggressive

DIO: gonna cry?

Chad with a gun: ur mom's gonna cry

LisaLisa: it just devolves even more every single time someone messages

oreng: gufo!!!!!!!!1!!

furg: ...

furg: i prefer furg

oreng: shutu theedebd fucuck uppp

oreng: lisetend tot thisis impshirisortant thing im gojdnrnna say

Ih8giorno: lisalisa was right about this chat devolving

Ih8giorno: although i think it was specifically narancia's grammar

big balls johnson: phat. ass. cheeks.

Ih8giorno: ...

LisaLisa: no it was the whole chat

furg: aaaanyway narancia, what do you want?

oreng: missjta has been thehryesheaxching m ehow to pjick up uuchickwuds

pure boy 😇: narancia.

oreng: yaaaaaa?

pure boy 😇: thehryesheaxching.

oreng: mhmm

pure boy 😇: what the fuck.

furg: let me translate for you babe

pure boy 😇: thanks abe

pure boy 😇: shit i meant babe

big balls johnson: LOL Abe

ffffff: abe

furg: 'Mista's been teaching me how to pick up chicks'

Ih8giorno: oh dear god

Chad with a gun: hell yeah i have 😎

pure boy 😇: oh god narancia why

oreng: whasdjshst

oreng: ive benen geiritjng some pretty goir dtips do far

Ih8giorno: JUST THINK BEFORE YOU TYPE

furg: well um.. what tips has he given you

Chad with a gun: my favourite one is 'approach no matter what'

pure boy 😇: *spits out milk*

furg: NO MATTER WHAT!?

kale muncher: RAPIST RAPIST

kale muncher: stinky rapist

furg: stinky?

Mama Bear: well i for one am happy that you two are helping each other

COCKyoin added Star Finger

Ih8giorno: but... but bruno... he just said approach no matter what

Mama Bruno: and? :)

Ih8giorno: now im scared

oreng: we dontne talk aboths beunoooooo

Star Finger: WHAT THE FUCK

Star Finger left the chat

DIO: based

COCKyoin: wtf narancia >:(

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