Cassandra.
The seminar ended, but not Jem and I. Our friendship and bond last, even on our way home. He still would cassually slip his hands on mine and play innocent. He would also snake his hands in my waist while pulling me closer to him just like what he had done now. Smiling, I look at the sleeping Jem who is embracing me sideways, he look peaceful and content at his post that looking at him makes me just wanna burst in tears of happiness. He look so perfect to me and his closeness and smell become so normal to me that I could sense him away even in my sleep.
My heart went flat with the thought of him leaving but as the memory of our swimming lessons played in my mind I can't help but believe in him.
* *
"Now were alone" He said to himself very satisfied while I just look at him in panic.
"Your so evil. ." I tried pouting and pull some act just to get somewhere nearer in the shore or atleast to the part where my foot could feel the ground. But his merciless and would just smile at me, playfuly.
"You can't play that act anymore. Your not a teenager!" He laughed at me while pinching my right cheek.
I pout more wanting to feel the safer ground.
"No. No. .no." He said shaking his head and trying to stand his guard.
I keep my act. Pouting with a pleading look for shore!
He looked up and laugh more, knowing to himself that I would win this time if I keep on doing him this face.
I secretly grin despite my fear of drowning knowing I'll taste land in no time.
Jem look at me again, this time grinning to himself as he release his grip on me and hold my face in his two hands.
"I swear Im gonna kiss you If you don't stop that." He sounded so serious, and damn his serious!
Feeling all heat, I blushed instantly making me think that I may as well look as red as a tomato.
I open my mouth in protest but shut it again. Despite the horror and blush I know deep inside me that those words ignited thousands of cells in my body. Wanting him to do the thing he promised but not wanting to make him do something stupid too.
I tried to say something again but before I could even speak his lips were already claiming mine.
I was stunned and almost breathless with his act. He was too close that I could already feel his heat and his heart pounding just like mine. He was so warm and his sweet lips, his soft thick lips that pressed a little to mine had not taken much advantage of me like he was asking me for some permission to continue and press forward.
Denying logic and wanting him bad I found myself anchoring my arms in his neck as I respond to his kiss. I drew myself closer to him to feel him more.
The kiss went smooth, not passionate and hungry but sweet and kind. A kiss that gives your spine a chill and your heart a dancing pound. A kiss that reflects forever and - - - and love.
After the kiss we parted a little but still so close that our forehead were still connected to each other. I feel myself tugged a smile as he smile too and give my nose a soft peck.
We stayed silent for a moment not wanting to ruin anything by words and reality. We just stayed there contented as we are knowing we shared the same feeling and love.
The silence wasn't awkward, infact it had built tingling sensation in my body knowing the excitement of his closeness and the idea of his love. He was just beautiful himself and breathing the same air with him makes me want to stay here forever.
"Now. .let me teach you how to swim." He finally said breaking the silence between us and though suddenly terrified, I found myself nodding at him.
"Just always remember, Im here. .and I would never let you go. ." He said sincerely through my eyes that I could even question whether he was referring to the water or to his love for me. Either way, Im too afraid to ask and to let go too. So finding all courage I just said. ."I know."
* * *
I felt Jem move slowly in my side waking me up my reverie.
"hey sleepy head." I greeted at him which he just reply with a kiss on my nose.
"Hey swimmer." He replied teasingly with a smile. He really can't get over it that I haven't really learned how to swim despite his efforts and his self proclaimed good teaching skills.
"Lame. ." I just said while he straigthen himself but still remaining close and embracing me.
"Tss. Next time Im gonna employ japanese swimming techniques."
I furrowed my brow at him. "And that is?"
"throw you in the middle of sea!" He said in a very serious tone making me feel dread and horror. The thought of being thrown just makes my face contorted.
"You can't be serious!" I said wanting to stomped away from him and his craziness.
"Ofcourse I am. .but don't worry. I'll jump after you." He said trying to assure me and his saving skills, but it did not make my feeling any better.
"You could have jump before me and catch after!" I said still horrified.
"Well. .If I jump before you then no one would throw you down in the waters."
"And why would you think I like being thrown into the waters?"
"Oh well. .its because I know you wanted to learn how to swim."
"and what makes you think I wanted to learn how to swim?"
He swiftly changed posotion and make himself comfortable looking at me. "Because you always has this look in your face whenever you watch the waters. ."
"What do you mean?" I asked confused.
He smile at me while he traced my noseline with his finger. " The look. .the appreciation of beauty and wanting to experience it yet too afraid to dive and swim. .I remember you said to me before you had a lot of beach time together when you were young but when you got orphaned you never went to beach anymore. ."
He remembered! He remembered what I said to him when we walked down at Manila bay watching the sun sets.
"I was busy. .and beaches were far and costly at that time." I admitted in a low voice, knowing that as a young woman before I always wanted how to swim, to do a lot of things until my youth had been taken away from me by my parents death.
"You lost a lot Cattey. .don't you think its time for you to regain what you've lost?"
Regain what is lost? How? My parents won't be revived so as my brother Eli, my youth wouldn't be snatch back so as my suffering be gone. There is ---
I feel his warm hands crept in my face then moving he make me look into his eyes which were already looking intently at me as if wanting me to see what he really meant through it.
He can't be serious?
Astonished I found myself unable to speak and say a word.
"Please fasten your seatbelt.----" the stewardess suddenly paged giving me time to break away with him and fasten myself as if by doing so I would find answers or words to say to him.
But I didn't, too coward I keep my mouth shut until the moments pass by and we landed safely already.
Still unable to speak we or I went out of the plane then took my luggages and walk in awkward silence. I could sense he knew my silence and that his eyes are mainly focused on mine but being a mother and a sister for years is a task Ive been doing that it become second nature to me. Thats why in all decisions made, my sister had always been included and its pretty impossible to do the changes now.
Feeling guilty and assurance I foumd myself wanting to hold his hands but restrain myself to do so, but Jem is Jem, despite my silence he walked in my side, slipped his hands in mine, squeezed it respectfully and just walk with me as if nothing really did happen up there.
Appreciating his understanding I return the squeeze and felt suddenly fine with his presence and walk contentedly until I saw a figure waving at us.
My heart suddenly sunk a thousand miles deeper as I forced myself to take my hands away from Jem.
"Your back!" Emme said delighfully while walking toward me and hugged me tight. Her vibrance haven't change that I could have just forgotten her disappointment with me before I leave her.
She trusted you. My innerself said drowning me with guilt.
"Im so glad your back."She said still hugging me and when she part her eyes glitter with good expectation. Thinking that me and Jem were already in good terms.
If she only knew, she wouldn't pray for it, not even a bit.
"Hon!" She rushed to Jem's side with the same aura and had given him a light kiss as a greeting then hugged him back which Jem return a bit reluctant.
"I missed you so much!" Emme said as she showered him with kisses Jem was almost shocked and a bit stony, he was sudden caught of what to do with me being near and with Emme being present.
Feeling fool, I really could do the dugging of my own tomb in my place at this very moment just to hide and vanish from them.
How so nice.
"Ive prepred a welcome dinner for the two of you so common lets go!" She said excitedly which we both replied with a timid smile both not knowing what to do and what to act. But recovering first I calmed myself and face my innocent sister.
"Sounds lovely." I said as positive as possible while smiling encouragingly at Jem.
He just nodded at me with an understanding smile but with a worried expression.
"yes. .it sounds lovely." Jem finally replied with his voice almost hoarse.
"Okay. .then up up in a way!" Emme exclaimed as she dragged us to the car.