As I stepped into the room, I could feel the gaze of every Alpha upon me, piercing me through and through. I felt naked, vulnerable, and laid bare open in front of a group of strangers that were carefully watching my every move, holding my fate in their hands and assessing my worthiness to a better life.
When I looked up at the table where the Alphas sat, most of them had already lost interest in me. Their eyes were scanning the other wolflings who came in with me, not trailing a moment too long on the creature Beckett had dragged along. I suddenly found myself missing that vulnerability I experienced moments ago because their lack of interest was sure not to be promising for me.
The Alphas sat in order of the Moons, the Wise Moon's Alpha on the left and the Death Moon's Alpha finishing the row on the far right. The two Alphas on either side of Beckett could not fool anyone about the pack they belonged to.
Strong Moon's Alpha, Mika, sat with such force and intensity, the power radiating off his muscular physique was undeniably the power of strength. He bulged over the other Alphas, and the confidence he emanated filled the room with a thick tension, one that could not be cut with a sharp blade, but only be smashed down by brute force.
On Beckett's right sat Cailean, whose name father had mentioned many times, with a carefree and relaxing attitude. I heard stories about him, stories of his age that went way back beyond my lifetime. But now he sat before me, he looked about as old as me. I wondered if his opponents ever underestimated him because of it, and paid the steep price. If the stories were true, Cailean was a deadly werewolf. But tonight, he looked unbothered. Bored, even. I wondered how many Ascensions he had already experienced, to find this life-altering moment so dull.
The fourth Alpha to the left, a female wolf who looked to be of middle age, had to be Life Moon's Alpha, Lucienda. Female Alphas were fewer, but by no means less capable. Life Moon's Alpha had a shorter haircut of a dark blonde color, where hints of grey started to appear. Her face showed a few lines, indicating her age, and she looked kind, wise, and gentle, and everything I longed for in an Alpha.
There were three other female Alphas in the room. Wise Moon was graced with one, as were Scent Moon and Swift Moon. All four of them looked stunning and powerful, and worthy opponents of their male counters. A knot rose in my chest at the realization that next to them, I looked even more weak than I was.
We were ushered to move along and pass all the Alphas one by one so they could smell our scent, to open the path to perhaps join their pack if it convinced them we'd be a good asset. Like we were cattle on a farmer's market, waiting to be bought and sold to another farmer who'd decide our worth based on their value of us.
Nervous, I stumbled forward. I hoped they couldn't smell my nerves, as I was sure that would not leave a good impression, but in a room full of the most powerful wolves, my hopes were in vain. But most of the Alphas seemed not to care about me as I passed them. Could I blame them? An orphaned wolf from the Fire Moon Pack, without any powers setting in. Beckett had clearly shown his interest in keeping me in his Fire Moon Pack, which meant taking me in equaled pissing off Beckett. I was a liability at best. Still, it stung and my heart lurched and broke and shattered into oblivion at the thought of having to return to Spitta, of having to keep playing Beckett's twisted games.
The fifth Alpha from the left, Scent Moon, sniffed as I passed but did not bother to even look at me. I could've sworn I saw her nose wrench as I passed her, but we had to move along so quickly, I wasn't sure if I had seen it correctly. I'd never felt so raw.
Beckett seemed to notice the predicament I found myself in too, as he leaned back and smirked at me as I passed him. Knowing he'd likely be able to torture me for the infinite years to come, his arrogance made me sick to my stomach. I prayed another Alpha would show interest in me, and get me out of his claws.
But each one I passed seemed even less interested than the one before. All eyes were on Mage, the blonde wolfling who came from Healing Moon and who was already showing signs she'd become a powerful Healer. An absolute asset to any pack, I'd fallen into nothing next to her.
As I neared the end of the table, I looked at Death Moon's Alpha and found his silver eyes looking straight back at me. I had only heard of him through whispers, as no one dared to say his name out loud. He was rumored to be a cruel, malicious tyrant, the monster in the younglings' nightmares.
He possessed terrible power, coming from Death Moon. And anyone who looked long enough at the other Alphas at the table could see that they knew too who sat among them. They felt the threat he possessed and they had all adjusted their seat only a little bit, barely noticeable, to sit as far away as possible from him.
I wondered if Death Moon's Alpha recognized the freight he infused in the other Alphas. If he read their bodies as I just did. Perhaps he knew, perhaps he did not care at all. He showed no emotion on his stoic face, other than perhaps a mirroring of Cailean's boredom.
Two Alphas sat between Beckett and Death Moon's danger, but both didn't take the energy to even sniff me out. As I finally passed the final Alpha, who had not taken his eyes off me, he sniffed and I saw a quick glance of disgust pass his eyes before he too, averted his gaze and lost interest in me. And as his focus on me suddenly vanished, so did my hope of escaping.
Once the first part of the Ascension was over, all the wolflings were led outside of the room again. We were told our pack Alphas would now discuss us, and play to our strengths and weaknesses so the other Alphas could make an informed decision on whether or not they'd let us in. We were not to take part in this meeting, as it was confidential. My heart sank in my chest, knowing my hope of escaping rested in the one person who I needed escaping from. And with all the Alphas being preoccupied with the other wolflings, I realized I stood no chance at all.
Beckett had won, as he would always. He knew it too, it was written all over his face when we left the room. His eyes were screaming at me, telling me he'd do anything he could to extinguish my chances with the other Alphas. And I had absolutely no power to do anything about it.
We were led to another room and I wondered just how many rooms this Castle had for events like this. This one was filled with red, velvet sofas that accompanied a big fireplace. The fireplace had an antique, but still well-maintained feel to it. On the other side of the room sat a large glass table, with matching chairs that screamed out elegance. In the far corner were two more little couches in a matching red, for the wolves who preferred a more solitary seating.
As the other wolves began talking about the pros and cons of each pack and listing which ones they'd rather join, I didn't have the heart to join the conversation. I could not talk about the other packs, or dream about a better life I was now sure I would never have. I had to gather all my strength not to fall apart then and there, so I excused myself and went to the bathroom. Once I arrived, I locked the door and let myself break down.
"Better get that out of your system now. Don't let the others see or smell your tears, their saltiness never leaves a good impression."
I jumped up as I left the bathroom and bounced into a strange man. A face I hadn't seen since I arrived, but his carefree, arrogant attitude showed he was someone important. His eyes burned through me, in a brownish green that could set worlds on fire.
I didn't think about how long I'd locked myself in there so I couldn't know how long he'd been standing at the door. And I had been too preoccupied to have even smelled him out. Moons know how long he'd stood in the hallway, listening to my crying, smelling my tears, reeking my despair.
"I don't know what you're talking about," I lied, hoping my heartbeat would not tell on me. The man before me looked powerful, and by my experience, powerful wolves were able to tell when one's heart skipped a beat or fastened just that tiny bit when they were lying.
He tilted his head, looking me straight in the eyes. "I can tell you're lying, yes. I don't even need to be a powerful wolf to realize that," he casually mentioned, focusing his green eyes even more intensely, gauging my reaction at what he'd just revealed.
"Get out of my head, you bloody Wise Moon," I sneered. It was my first encounter with a wolf blessed by Kavitvana, and I already felt more exposed than I had ever been.
He straightened back up before he replied, with absolutely no intent on addressing his invasion of my privacy, "Very good. You figured it out quicker than most. But then again, you kind of have to, don't you? I don't see a single droplet of power in your mind." His tongue clicked against his teeth when he finished his last words, digging my grave for me.
"I've never agreed to let you dig around my mind. Get out." My voice sounded more frustrated and I was sure my body was showing him the same sentiment.
It didn't seem to impress him much. "You're letting me in and you're letting me read you. You're a very untrained wolf, Sari. I wish you luck." He leaned over to whisper something in my ear before striding off, sending shivers down my spine. "Looks like you're going to need it."
I turned around to face his back, and he started walking away. "Who are you?" I yelled after him.
"No one you should worry about," he said as he turned around, and a teasing grin appeared on his face before he disappeared again.
I rejoined the others who had sat down on some sofas opposite each other, still discussing all the packs. I felt like even the tiniest chance I had of escaping Beckett's grip would go to waste if the Alphas found me here, sitting like a lone wolf. That'd just confirm the stories Beckett by now no doubt had told them about me.
The wolflings barely looked up as I sat down on the sofa next to one of the boys, Carter from Seeing Moon if I remembered correctly. The wolf from Hidden Moon I'd met earlier wasn't visible in plain sight, and I didn't bother to search him out. If he was hiding, he wanted to be alone. I that moment, I wished I could disappear into shadows as well.
I couldn't really follow which pack the wolflings were talking about now, their descriptions were so vague and general it seemed to fit multiple packs. But when I heard Beckett's name pop up, my heart raced and I couldn't help but join the discussion.
"Their Alpha is such a powerful wolf. If the stories are true, he challenged the Death Moon's Alpha and killed not only him but his wife as well. You've got to be a strong wolf to be able to do that," one of them muttered and the others nodded in confirmation. And in awe.
"Or a stupid one," I countered.
They all looked at me in disbelief, as if they misunderstood and I didn't just insult one of the most powerful Alphas. But I'd be damned if I let Beckett get his grip on one more innocent life. The front he presented to the outside world as the legitimate and fair Alpha was nothing more than that. A front, and they should know. We get to make informed decisions too, if we get to make any decisions at all.
"He declared war on this pack, and for what?" I clarified. "He doesn't possess the power to take over the Alpha position in the Death Moon Pack. And now their current Alpha's consumed with a thirst for blood - our blood."
Mage was the only one of them to look at me with any sympathy and understanding, or even believe a word I had just said. The other wolflings narrowed their eyes at me, seemingly forgotten the state I had been in when I arrived in this Castle.
"But he managed already to take on the previous Alpha. The new Alpha can't be as powerful yet, since he was forced to take over. Death Moon hasn't made any move on Fire Moon yet has it? And how many years ago did the challenging happen? Looks like you're just spewing out stories to keep us away from your Alpha," one of the other boys sneered, I hadn't bothered to remember his name. But those piercing blue eyes looked at me with disgust.
"Yes, yes. If he defeated one before, he could do so again. Death Moon seems to know it too if they haven't attacked yet," Carter confirmed.
"Are you kidding me?" I spewed. Were they that blind? "Did you just see Death Moon's Alpha? You could feel his power from across the room. Even the other Alphas felt it--and feared it. He might just wait until he is strong enough to take on Beckett. As you said, he wasn't as powerful when he was forced to take on as Alpha. But he's had years to train by now."
I hoped they'd see the truth in my words. The Fire Moon Pack was a dangerous place to be, even without the looming threat of Death Moon hovering over us. Even now, years later, people in the streets feared the vengeance that was sure to overcome us. Even the humans, who knew nothing of this war, felt the air grow thicker every year, felt the wind grow wilder and stories floated of an imminent doom, a danger waiting around the corner and preparing to strike.
I hadn't stopped thinking about avenging my parents ever since they died. I couldn't imagine Death Moon's Alpha feeling any different.
"Besides," I continued, "even if he were to forgive and forget, who can say the same about the rest of his pack? They lost their Alpha and his wife. You're telling me they'd just let that slide? That they're not out for vengeance?" As my new argument settled in their minds, I glanced at Mage. She nodded at me, barely noticeable, but enough to confirm she understood. She was warned and she recognized the dangers that would follow should she join the Fire Moon Pack.
I reckoned all the packs would want her. She was the most powerful wolfling out of all of us, by far. The Alphas would be fools not to take her in.
Before we could finish our conversation, one of the priests who had brought us in here came back to get us. "They've finished," he spoke. "Let your Ascensions begin."
And with those words, my soul left my body.