Devante's P.O.V
I got my fucking baby back the next morning Drizz was in bed next to me
We was up all night fucking fucking I'll be surprise if she ain't pregnant they way I kept bussing in her
Im rubbing on that ass she giggled and said "round 6"
"Im ready bend over"I said
"Nigga I was just playing Im sleepy"She whined
"What you was doing last night why was you up so late anyways"I asked
She turned back and looked at me and said "what you mean"
"Did You fuck somebody else Drizz It ain't like I can get mad"I said
"No I didn't"She said
"aight"I said
"You want me to get up and take the girls to school"She asked
"Nah Since Im already up I might as well do it and Santana like his early rides"I said
I kissed her neck and "get some rest"
"Okay but Round 6 when you get back"She said
"Bet"I said
I got up threw some clothes on and went to wake the twins up
I got them up they wash their faces and brush their teeth and as they were getting dressed I was getting Santana ready
When I got a text from Noelle saying she needed to talk
Talk ?? I got four kids normally when a female say she needs to talk it involves a positive pregnancy result in it somewhere in it
Me and Drizz just got back together and that shit would fucked up everything right mow
Drizz definitely divorcing my ass quick she ain't going for that shit so this bitch better not be pregnant
My daughters so spoiled every morning before school I gotta stop at Starbucks for cake pops and Lemonades every morning it's mandatory
After that at I dropped my babies off headed over on Noelle
I texted her Im outside
She come out and she looked back at Santana in his carseat
"You have Santana I thought Andrea wasn't letting you see him she changed her mind"Noelle asked
"Nah We back together"I said
"What....I thought she slept with your cousin "She said
"She didn't she was just saying shit to make me mad"I said
"And you believe that"She said
"Man thought you needed to talk I got better shit to do than to explain my love life to you"I said
"You mad aggressive for what"Noelle said
"Is you pregnant or some shit"I asked straight up
"I don't know Im 7 days late"She said
Fuck
"You took a test"I asked
"Im scared"She said
"7days is not really late foreal"I said
"It is for me Im never late"She said
She looked so sure
"Noelle me and Drizz just got back together"I said
"Yeah you said that all you care about is her what about me you act like I never matter to you"She said
"Man you knew I had a wife we started fucking around Its gon always be her always"I said
She looked at me with this sad as look on her face and "never once did I ask for this happen never did I plan to fall for a nigga who don't give one fuck about me you know what this is so besides me"
She attempted to get out the car I stopped her
She started tearing up
"Look I ain't mean it like that its a Cvs a few block lets just take a test together before we get in our feelings "
We go to cvs buy a 5 test
And Congratulations to me Im having another fucking baby
Im just fucked up after comforting Noelle now I gotta break my baby heart again
No nigga wanna do this especially to the female they love
That girl my whole ass heart and I don't know how ima tell her this It ain't even words do to do shit
I get back home and she walked up to me smiling
"Is that a bagel with extra cream cheese"She asked
"Yea I figured all that sex would have you hungry"I said
"Aw babe I love you"She said smiling at me
Than she looked at Santana and said "You see how good daddy treats mommy"
"We gotta talk"I said
"Yeah we do so since the lease is almost here and financially we're both doing well I think we should start looking for our dream house"
"Noelle is pregnant"I blurted out
I just couldn't lie to her no more
She froze and looked confused
"She's pregnant"She said
"I just found out"I said
She took her fist and hit me in my jaw hard as hell
I grabbed my face "shit"
"You mean to tell me you didn't use a condom with this bitch !"She yelled at me
She stormed out of the bedroom and started putting on her clothes
"I never meant for this happen"I said
"What was supposed to happen Devante you fucked this hoe raw! She having your child congratulations you think ima stick around why so you can just keep having babies on me nigga fuck you!"She said
She started gathering her things getting ready to leave
"You not leaving"I said
She looked at me with tears in her eyes and "you don't understand my hearts is breakin I can't do this shit again Devante"
I grabbed her and pinned her against the wall
She just started crying
"Im sorry Drizz for everything I put you through you Im sorry for doing this to us but Im not letting you leave Im not baby we married you can't keep running away everytime god is testing us because that all its just a test"I said
"How did you let this happen you told me you got me you said we was gon be good you said I wouldn't have to worry about nothing why do you do this to me Devante"She cried
"People are gonna drag me"She cried
"Fuck them do you love me"I asked
"Thats not the point Devante "She said
"Just answered the question do you Andrea Sky Evans You Love Me?"I asked her
"yes"She said as a tear fell from her eye
"Than thats all that matters people can say what they want at the end of the day they gon know I ain't coming off you never they gon know I love you cause Ima stand on that till death do us part"I said
"Ima pay whatever to make sure this shit don't come out as far as me Noelle we done Ima be there for our baby and thats that its me and you forever"I said
Andrea P.O.V
Nobody would ever know the pain I endured fucking with this nigga
The shit hes done I should hate him I should just take my son and leave foreal on this nigga
I should turn my back on him and live my best life
My head was so messed up I couldn't even concentrate working
I was going through it and I didn't tell nobody I couldn't tell nobody Im too fucking embarrassed
Me and Kamarrii went out for drinks
And Im just distracted overthinking and obsessing over the Noelle baby situation
"Bitch is you even listening to me"She asked breaking my distraction
"Huh oh yeah you was talking about your fendi bag"I said taking a sip of my margarita
"Not just any fendi bag its only 12 in the world wassup with you you haven't been your self"She said
"Hi Nothing"I said
She started playing with her nose its clear shes coked out today so I really can't talk to her
She rolled her eyes and said "what could be going on in Andrea little perfect world"
"My world"I said pointing to myself
"Is not perfect"I said
She rolled her eyes and said "yes it is your makeup line sold out Devante Hits is killing it on the charts and just made Vice President A&R of Diamonds records yeah he cheated but you got your dream car out of it all you do is complain about everything"She said
"Fuck you!"I said
She shrug her shoulders and said "Im sick of you complaining about everything you literally have everything you want you always get what you want"
"Put the coke down and maybe you can achieve some of your dreams too"I said
She smiled and said "We going there really okay well since we going there well maybe you should put the drink down because god knows you one more drink from being a full blown alcoholic everybodys saying it"
"Not the crackhead calling me a Alcoholic"I said
"You sure Devante cheated or was you off the bottle that night"She said
"You managed to get one those limited bags but bitch where yours kid at hoe bitch we be together every day and you're never with your kid"I said
"Bitch please you have a nanny you no better than me"She said
"I have a part time nanny after this Im going home to my kids something you don't know nothing about"I said
"What you want cookies bitch"She said
"All i wanted was a friend I keep forgetting that your not capable of being that untill its convenient for you....."I said
"Bitch I am your friend I literally listen to you complain about you perfect life meanwhile Im going through real life !"She said getting emotional
"Im going through real life too"With tears in my eyes
"Bitch he cheated so what take the nigga back and get all his passwords and put him in the dog house its simple"She said
"He got her pregnant so its not simple!"I yelled
"What"She asked
"How perfect is my world now ! I finally take his ass back and what he do he fucked me all night long just to bring me a bagel and tell me thats she's having his fucking kid and thats not even the worst part the worst part is that I still love the nigga"I said fighting tears back
She pushed her margarita towards me and said "huh Take mines you bitch need it"
I giggled as a tear fell from eyes
"Yea give the Alcoholic your drink because thats what Alcoholic need"I said
"Ima crack head so gimme some crack bitch"She said
And we both busted out laughing
Than we paused and looked at eachother
"My mother is fighting me for custody for Carter thats where he's at now thats where he's been"She said
"She can do that"I asked
"You can do anything when you got money paying lawyers thousands of dollar a hour money maybe he's better off with her you know its not like I have my shit together"She said
"He's better off with his mother Carter loves the ground you walk on Kamarrii you need to get your shit together I know me and Stacy go through it sometimes but she never abandoned me don't abandon him he will hate you"I said
"I needed to hear that and Andrea you the shit stop letting that nigga treat you like your average it's okay to take the nigga back I get it I know you want ya son to have a family but don't keep taking the disrespect how many times you gon let this play you like a dummy"She said
"Okay so now what you gon stop snorting shit and ima stop drinking"I asked
"Bitch not today"She said and we both just laughed
I got drunk because why not
I got home Devante was in the kitchen cooking and helping the girls with their homework at the kitchen table
Santana was in little swing
"Hey Andrea "Makayla said
I came over and kissed her and Malaiyah head
"How was school"I asked
"Boring"Malaiyah answered
"Daddy can we take a lunch to school that food is nasty"Makayla said
"Please daddy"Malaiyah said
"Well see go finished yall homework in the back Ill be there to check it food is almost done"He said
They both got up and went to the back I grabbed my favorite bottle of wine and poured me a glass
Devante took the freshly poured wine and threw it in the sink
"What is that glass dirty"I said examining the wine glass
"You already drunk"He said
"You need to chill with all the drinking shit its not a good look last night you fell asleep drunk before you gave Santana a bath you left the water running and everything"He said
"Getting another bitch pregnant isnt a good look either"I said angrily
"Throw that in face whats that your 12th time this week"He said
"Than maybe you shouldn't impregnated every female you fuck"I said
"This shit is getting old"He said shaking his head
"Kiss my ass !"I said
"Maybe we shouldn't do this if you gotta keep throwing my face in shit maybe you should just move back into that one bedroom apartment cause Im sick of the drinking and the nasty attitude every fucking day"He said
"Than why beg to get back together than bitch"I said
"Watch yo mouth because if I get to calling you out yo name you gon be ready to fight me"He said
"Fuck you bitch!"I said
"Call me a bitch one more time Andrea and we gon have a problem that neither one of us can solve ima fucking hurt you watch !"He said giving me a death stare
Than Santana starting crying
I went to go pick him up and I placed him on my chest and sat back down at the kitchen table
I kissed his forehead and gently pat him on the back as he went back to sleep
Devante start shaking his bottle and sat down
Than I watched him as he made me plate
He fried some chicken,Steamed some garlic butter broccoli with some mashed potatoes
He grabbed me a bottle of water
He sat the plate and the bottle of water infront of me
"I'll feed him while you eat"He said as he took Santana from me and sat down and started feeding him
I started eating and as he said "if you don't want to do this than you wasting everybody time"
"Im trying Andrea but this not gon work unless you trying too"He said
I've been such a bitch and so mean to him lately I know its not fair but shit if you ask me the nigga bought this shit on his own self
I guess Im suppose just act like happy you know with the nigga getting another bitch pregnant
Its like I don't know how to get that happy place again
Im not happy at all not with Devante not with myself
I was fucking miserable
While I was laying in bed sleep as Devante was sleeping on my lap
My phone started ringing and I look and Shannon was calling
I quickly ignored his call and blocked his number
I got on Instagram scrolling lurking the usual shit we do on Instagram
Than people started messaging and commenting under my recent pics
"Sorry for your loss"
"Praying for you"
"My condolences"
People was commenting
"What"I said
People were saying Ahjanay was dead
Yeah right is this a sick ass joke
I got to her page and people are commenting R I P under pic
My heart start throbbing through my chest
I Immediately dialed her contact
Straight to voicemail
I started to panic
Im shaking so hard Devante looked up and "Whats wrong"
"Why are people saying Ahjanay is dead"I said
He jumped up and said "Ahjanay ???what happened "
"I don't know I hope Its not true"I said
I called my mother it ringed a little bit before she answered
"Ma have you talked to Ahjanay"I asked worrying
"Last night why what's wrong"She said
"Im trying to figure why people are saying she's Rest in peace on social media"I said
As Im talking to my mama my auntie calls
I clicked over quick
"Hello"I said
She screamed in the phone "Ahjanay was shot and killed !"
When she said that I felt my chest tightened up and I found hard to breathe
I dropped the phone and I think I went into to shock
Because I got up out the bed and grabbed my shoes
"What happened "Devante asked
As Im putting my shoes on I evey bone in me collapsed to the floor
Like my chest was so heavy it felt like all of life's weight on me and I couldn't breathe
I never felt this type of pain before
This pain was the worse it felt like it literally punched a hole in my chest
And I couldn't breathe I couldn't catch my breathe
Devante attempted to calm me down
I couldn't believe this shit was happening to me it don't feel real but this shit don't feel fake either this shit just hurts so deep
"Bae breathe"Devante said
I inhaled and exhale as tears streamed down my face and I started screaming "Noooooooooooooooo! noooooo ! Noooooooooooo
Not my fucking sister
She was in the car with her baby father leaving Walmart when a another car pulled on the side of them and started shooting
16 bullets went through that car
In the words of Devante "that wasnt no accident it was money on somebody head"
All Ahjanay do is work braid hair on the side and go home to her kid
Her Babyfather he be in the streets
So you tell me who those bullets was really for
Thank god my Niece was with my auntie than again one day somebody's gonna have to tell that little girl that both her father and her mother was killed leaving Walmart going to get her some pull ups
My sister my fucking baby my headache my peacemaker is fucking gone
This that pain that hurts so fucking bad and its so unbearable unimaginable that I don't wish it on no one
No one deserve to die like that no one should hurt this bad
I didn't wanna see nobody I didn't want to talk to nobody I just wanna lay here in this bed
Not think not feel just lay here
Two days passed Josh came over laid in the bed I still said nothing
Kamarrii came over and tried to lure me outta bed with an shopping trip on her still nothing
Devante tried multiple times to get me out and I couldn't do it
One day My mother came in
She looked at me laying in the bed
"So what you gon do die on me too"My mother said
I put the cover over my head and she snatched the cover right back off my head
"You think you get to lay here and be sad and depressed no I am her mother and Im not curled in the bed sad!"She said
"You can't do this Andrea !"She yelled at me
"Get outttttttt!"I screamed at him
"Or what what you gon do about it "My mother said
"Its been three days you think you the only one thats fucked up we all going through it! ..So what you gonna do about it "my mother yelled
I stood up
"Oh getting up ....Im suppose to be scared!"My mother said
"Okay Stacy you really wanna try me ? TODAY!"I asked
"Yea bitch I do and by the way you look like yo ass stank have you showered"She said walking backwards out my room
"Im not in the mood today !"I screamed
I followed her out the room
And I walked in and all my family and friends are sitting outside
I looked around and my dumbass is actually scanning the room to see if Ahjanay was there
Than I realize I would never see her again
The thought alone is killing me
I just broke down and did the only thing I can do the only thing I've been doing,cried
I never cried so hard in my life
I've loss my only sister my baby
I never thought in a million years this would happen to me
I never really dealt with a loved one
You would've thought shell outlive us all
My family stood around as my uncle prayed over us
"Lord we come to you today to ask for your strength your grace and your love dear god we ask that you ease our grieving hearts,Oh mighty god I ask you wrapped your arms around my family lord helps find some peace"He said
"God we know our beloved Ahjanay is right with you lord after all she was yours first lord"He said
"God it hurts but we believe in your reasoning and we believe in your word lord help us mend our broken hearts today"He said
I done been through some dark days before but none that could ever compare to this
It felt like I would never laugh again like I'll never know happiness again
A piece of my heart is gone forever
I didn't wanna be involved with any funeral planning I didn't even wanna go
But i did I wanted to atleast say my last goodbye to my sister
The funeral was back in Michigan
I needed to be numb I didn't wanna feel anything
Me and Kamarrii was drinking before the funeral
We shared a bottle of Hennessy outside in our rental car
She passed the bottle to me and said "you believe god"
I took a sip of a Hennessy and said "yeah I do just not at this moment"
"You think they gon find the niggas who did it"She asked
"I don't know at this point it wouldn't even make me feel better it can't bring my sister back"I said taking another sip
"I remember when she came on her period and she was crying because she thought the blood came from her wiping to hard"Kamarrii said reminiscing
I laughed and said "I remember when she first started braiding"
"She use to fuck our hair up"Kamarrii laughed
"Yeah she did but she got better she was just telling me how she wanted to opened her own hair salon"I said getting emotional because that was like one of our last conversation and I didn't even know it
"She was the only person I let do my braids now whos going braid my hair"Kamarrii said crying
Me....Im all out of tears just a lot of anger and depression
I pat her on her back
And just sat there drinking more
I walked in and she was in her rose gold pink caset.
Her favorite color was the same as mines
She was really a mini me
She looked like she was at peace
I touch her cold hand
I took a deep breath and look down at her
Its Taking everything in me not to break down
Ima standing strong because my sister know I hate crying she wouldn't want me crying
My mother and my auntie uncle sister brother and niece walked in
My mama was wearing this big ass fur like this a fashion show she was trying show people she got money
She looked down and said "Girl you looking good..." To Ahjanay body
She kissed her on her forehead and said "Its not goodbye mama gon see you again in a better life r i p babygirl I love you"
"She can't rest in peace she was murder"I said
"You smell like a Hennessy factory"My mother said
I smiled and said "Don't I suppose to sign the death certificate you know what hand over her birth certificate you don't deserve it we both know who her mother is"
"Andrea"My auntie said shocked
"No sky Andrea clearly need the attention she claim I never gave her!"my mother said
"Claim!? "I said
"Im sorry where were when she needed help with homework,or when some girls try to jump her in the bathroom at the skating rink,or how about whe she cried hysterically over getting her period"I asked
"Providing for your ungrateful ass! Making sure yall had food making sure yall had clothes make sure yall had everything yall needed and shit y'all didn't need"My mother yelled
"We needed a fucking mother in the home with us because I didn't know what to do when she started fucking she needed you ! To talk about birth control or something this is all your fault instead of embracing her pregnancy you should've made her get rid of it like you did me!"I yelled
Than when she took hand and wrapped it
around my throat
"You disrespectful ass bitch hoe I bought you in this world and bitch I swear on everything I love in this world I'll end your life if you ever talk to me like that again"She said as she choked me
My father pulled her off me
As he dragging her out of the church she screaming "I've should've abandoned I should've swallowed you you so motherfucking disrespectful it dont make no damn sense"
I was holding my neck "She just put her hands on me"
My father walked back in as my auntie looked furiously at me
"That enough Andrea! Get yo ass up and sober up and I mean you better sober up quick before I put my hands on you next!"My auntie said
"Get yo ass up now!"My father said
One thing about Sky and Tone they gon parent my ass no matter how grown I am
They always gon check my ass when I needed to be checked
During the funeral they made sit next to Bella in between them both like Im a child
My auntie went in her purse and gave Bella peppermint than gave me one too
The whole service I couldn't concentrate on anything but the fact that I will never see her again
The hardest part of the funeral is when they shut that casket closed Forever
I watched them take the casket out
My auntie asked "You riding with usto the gravesite"
"I can't watch them put her in the ground"I said shaking my head
My father looked at my auntie and said "yall go ahead well meet you there"
"Okay"My auntie said as she kissed my father
He sat down next to me and wrapped his arm around me
I laid my head on him and said "I miss her I miss her already"
"You gon always miss her but I don't believe shes truly gone I can feel all her love here right now"He said
"Ahjanay spirit lives through our memories her child through us she wouldn't want you drinking yourself to death"He said
"Drinking makes me feel better"I said
"It don't make you feel better it makes you escape reality....a big difference "He said
"I hate my life"I cried
"Than do something about it do what you need to do to make you happy because thats the only way you can survive a heartbreak like this"He said
"Ahjanay was peaceful she worked takes care of her kid thats it maybe you should continue her legacy instead of drinking your sorrows away live the life that she cant"He said
"Im sorry for earlier today I was just angry"I bursted into tears
"I can't believe im finna say this but you owe Stacy an apologize you loss your sister she lost her baby Andrea what if it was Santana in that casket"He said
"I would wanna die"I cried
"Times 10"My Father said
He put things in perspective for me it made me think I know today I can't be living how I've been living