I sat near the edge of the beach wall staring out into the sea. Sneaking out of the cabin was heartbreaking. It made me remember about the time I left Control. It seemed like running away was the only thing I was good at.
I pulled up my knees to my chest sighing heavily. What made me think that I deserved to ask life why he treated me this way. Every bad decision I made was done with me knowing the consequences of it.
Someone sat by me but I didn’t have to look over to know who it was. Ale kicked his feet against the concrete wall staring at the ocean. We both stayed silent listening to the crash of the waves.
“Why?” He asked me suddenly. “Why throw everything away just like that?”
“I didn’t throw anything away. I make mistakes that’s all.” I defended myself.
He chuckled quietly. “You make too many mistakes,” I snapped my eyes up at him.
“Did you force me here to blackmail me? To tell me that you are going to tell Jayden?” I spat at him hurt filling my voice.
He shook his head in disagreement. He looked down at his feet not speaking to me. His black hair was all over the place and he had small bags under his eyes. He must have not slept at all last night.
“I need to tell you something…” He spoke out stopping for a moment. “I need you to know the truth,” He whispered not looking at me.
“What truth?” I asked him calmly.
His brown eyes stared dead at me. “About everything,”
What the hell was that suppose to mean? I turned my body around looking at him closely. If he didn’t call me here to blackmail then what was this about? Was this his way of finally admitting that he didn’t want me to marry Jaydon. Or was this an apology for not listening to me.
“We’ve been through hell together…” He began saying. “I put you through hell for so long. A few years ago we were kids, stupid wild kids, and neither of us knew what we wanted.”
I scoffed. “I didn’t want to be near you, but that was too much to ask for.” I responded.
He glared at me shushing me. “Sorry,”
“I promised you a million things and I didn’t keep not even one promise. Then you left to Spain and I realized I loved you.” He whispered.
I stayed completely quiet. I wanted him to finish what he was saying before I spoke out. He shifted around his wait running his fingers through his hair.
“You came back and by then I tried to love Arianna, I tried to pretend as if she completed me but she didn’t. Then I saw you how I turned you, you became a complete wreck.”
“Took you long to notice it,” I muttered to myself.
“And it made me see that you and I cant be together, I determined myself to keep away from you, but that night before your moms wedding when you said you loved me it changed everything completely.” His voice cracked a little as he finished his sentence.
He picked up his head looking at me again. “I love you, I always had and I’ll always love you.”
I stopped breathing completely when he said that. He decided to confess his true feelings for me now, when I’m about to get married? This was bullshit, he was full of shit.
Standing up I walked away from him. I stopped walking making my hands into fists. No, keep walking Julie, just walk away.
“I know right now isn’t the best time to tell you this,” I heard him say.
“It never was the best time Alejandro. It was never the best time to tell me anything!” I yelled angrily at him.
He walked in front of me looking down. “I was afraid. I was afraid that we wouldn’t work, but I’ve learned you have to stop living with fear.”
My bottom lip began to tremble. He didn’t understand, he didn’t see that no matter what he tells me we couldn’t be together. I waited and waited for him to make up his mind. He decided to get engage and become a father.
Now he had to understand that I was deciding. Now it was my turn to be happy and fuck up. But if he thinks that he is getting me at the end of everything that has gone on isn’t going to happen.
“It’s too late,” I whispered looking away from him.
“Is it?” He asked me. “You just slept with Samuel, are you sure you know what you want?”
“I love Jaydon Ale, I love him with all my heart. He treats me right, we hardly fight,” I explained to him that this guy could be overly sweet but he was decent. Life could be a bit boring being with him but I was at peace. With Ale or Samuel life would be crazy, hectic.
“And no one is telling you that you don’t, but is it what you want?” He questioned me.
I looked up at him and sighed. “Even if I were to cancel my wedding I wouldn’t be with you,” I simply said. “I hate you,”
He chuckled. “I hate you too Julie. I hate you so much that sometimes I want to find you and strangle you to death!” He shrieked pulling out his hair.
I walked passed him and made my way to the car. Then why would he confess his feelings for me if I make him want to kill me. He was dumb and he didn’t know what he wanted.
I opened the car door getting ready to go when I heard him say. “But if pulling out my hair everyday means knowing I love you then I’ll do it.”
I’m going to hate myself. I dropped the keys onto the ground and ran over to him wrapping my arms around his neck. His large hands wrapped around my waist hugging me harder.
He kissed my neck causing chills to go down my spine. This what was happening here felt real. It made me feel alive. I could feel the blood pumping in my veins, and the rapid heartbeat he caused me.
He placed me down putting his forehead on top of mine. “I don’t want to take your happiness away,” He whispered. “I just wanted to feel your warmth around me.”
“Then you understand what I have to do right?” I whispered to him. He nodded kissing me on my forehead.
He brought me against his chest hugging me again. “I love you too,” I finally told him. “I hate you so much that I love you.”
***
“…You may kiss the bride,” The priest said. Everyone around us began clapping happily. He looked at me a big smile forming on his lips.
He put a hand on my waist pulling me into him smashing his perfect pink lips on mine. “I love you,” He whispered in my ear.
“I love you too,” I giggled.
We turned around smiling at everyone. Finally the day we all waited for anxiously had came. Jaydon and I were finally married. After having that little moment with Ale, I went back home.
I explained to them the pressure of the wedding had gotten to me and I needed sometime alone. They believed me even Xavier who for a slight moment had a doubt look on his face.
Samuel called me later that night saying thank you for leaving him alone, but he understood that I had to go back. For Ale and I we were just going to have a forbidden love.
Xavier stepped in front of me. His eyes were red from all the crying he was doing. This morning when he woke me up he had a box of tissues already near him. The moment I opened my eyes he burst into tears. He was being a little over dramatic, but I loved the feeling he showed for me.
“Didn’t I tell you to stop crying!” I giggled wiping away his tears with my thumb.
“I know, I know but you’re not little any-“ I sobbed escaped his lips and he began crying again. Linda walked up to us taking him away.
I looked over to Jaydon who was talking to Arianna. He kept touching her huge belly. He finally seemed relaxed and happy. Our lives finally felt in peace. Gabriela walked over to me, she had a cup of wine her hand.
“How does it feel to be a married women?” She teased me.
I took in a deep breath. “Um the same, the only thing is I have to wear a ring and say I’m married!” I joked with her.
From the girls Gabriela and Demi were the only ones who truly knew what happen this past week. I had to tell them because they knew exactly when I was lying. After confessing my affair with Samuel and moment with Ale, they said I could finally be at peace.
They were right, I was. I didn’t carry a burden around on my shoulders. I finally knew that Ale loved me and I loved him. There was no need of any arguments or tears. We could finally be at peace with one another.
“If you are looking for him he is at the bar,” I heard her say.
I rolled my eyes smiling. “I just want to talk to him,” I assured her.
I walked over to the bar at the end of the hall. Ale was sitting there drinking whiskey with ice. I looked at the bartender and ordered what he was drinking. His brown eyes looked at me and he smiled.
“Isn’t it too early for the bride to be drinking?” He teased me.
“It’s exactly eight-thirty,” I responded looking at the imaginary clock.
He laughed. “Your dumb,” He mocked me. He stood up giving me a hug and a kiss on the cheek. “You look very beautiful and congrats,”
I smiled at him. “Thank you, hopefully soon you’ll be getting married too,” I joked around with him.
He took his cup and finished drinking it. “Erg, no, I’m good I have a baby to worry about right now.”
Right, Arianna was due in another month, he had to be preparing for a life changing experience. He wouldn’t be a bad father, he would love his daughter more than any women he has ever slept with. He would be fine.
Jaydon walked up to us. He hugged me from behind keeping himself there. “I see you’re already trying to get drunk,” He laughed.
“Yeah you know so I’ll be easier to handle later on,” I winked at him.
Ale began coughing. “Okay, yeah it’s time for me to walk away now, excuse me.” He said quickly.
Jaydon turned me around staring at me hopelessly at me. I knew this would make him happy, and it made me happy as well. At this point who cared about the past, because I didn’t.
If one day he were to find out what I did, I wanted him to find out from me. But for now I would enjoy every second of every day with this guy. I didn’t know what was out there for us, and I didn’t know what would happen, but I wasn’t afraid.
As long as Jaydon kept smiling and laughing that would the only thing that would matter to me. He cocked his head to the side looking at me funny.
“What are you thinking about?” He asked me shyly.
“How lucky I am to have you.” I whispered kissing him softly.
He smiled against my lips kissing me deeper. I wished life could stop completely for me now. This moment and this happiness was everything I was asking for. It was all I needed.
Jaydon can be overly sweet but I know that sweetness can bend a broken heart, it can change it completely. A guy who has so much to offer and so much to give you is a keeper. He was no Ale nor Samuel he was way better than that. In his eyes I was the only girl he would ever see.
“Can someone please keep the couple away from each other before they end up naked!” We heard Xavier say on stage.
Jaydon and I started laughing. I drifted apart from Jaydon looking at Xavier. He blew me a kiss before he started giving a small speech.
“So as you all know my little sister isn’t little anymore. She’s a grown women…”
“Didn’t she have her period a long time ago?” Enrique screamed out.
Everyone burst into laughter and I covered my face as they turned red. Great why to word Xavier, just wonderful. Demi slapped his across the head shaking her head at him.
“Anyway, seeing you in a wedding dress is the most amazing thing out there. I know you are in the best hands, and that Jaydon will never hurt you. I just want to say is I’m proud of you Julie and I wish you a thousand years of happiness,” His eyes watered a little but he kept himself postured.
I ran over to him kissing him all over his face. “I love you too jerk face!” I whispered.
After a few more speeches from family and friends, and dancing the night away it was time to go. Jaydon held m bridle style as we entered our home. Xavier and Linda told us not to worry about anything, they had everything cleared for us.
As I scanned the house I saw candles were lit everywhere. Pink lily flowers were scatted around the stairs. And when Jaydon opened the door to our bedroom the bed was full with rose pedals. It was cliché I had to admit, but it was heart warming.
He put me down kissing me instantly. His hands roamed around my body until they took hold of the zipper of the dress and pulled it down. The puffy white dress fell to my knees. Jaydon took a deep breathe admiring me.
“You’re so beautiful,” He whispered to me.
I unbutton his shirt dropping it onto the floor next to my dress. I stared at his tattoos. He had gotten new ones because they were one’s I didn’t remember he had. But the ones that caught my attention were the birds on his chest. They always were beautiful to me.
I kissed his shoulder before laying my head on his shoulder. “I just want to stay like this forever,” I told him quietly.
He lowered his head planting a small love bite on my neck. “We can do this every night, so you’ll always feel like a princess.” He said in my ear.
He picked me up and lay me down on the bed and after that it seemed like a sweet memory.
**
So I thought I would leave it like that. Sweet and Simple. No it’s not the ending, but we are getting there. Actually it’s just around the corner my dear fans!
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