EVIE
Nail polish names are ridiculous. Banana Split yellow, Cherry on Top red, Marshmallow Dream white - was I choosing a colour to paint my toenails or ice cream. I did know for certain, that I was now craving a banana split. Damn you, Sally Hansen
The plastic container that had been full to the rim with every possible shade of pink imaginable balanced on my lap as the petite nail technician manhandled my feet. For a small lady, she sure gave the Terminator a run for his money. I had lost track of the amount of times she yelled at me in her broken English, her arms wiggling about, to "No move."
I was scared to even breathe. With careful movements, I picked out two possible colours. A light peachy-pink titled, Princess Peach, and a dark blue colour named, Raining Men. I was known to be indecisive at times and this was one of the hardest decisions I've had to make yet. (Yes - that is an exaggeration and no, I don't care...)
"I like that one," commented my mom, who had lucked out with the technicians sweet daughter. She pointed to the peach bottle. I rolled the bottle against my hands, closing one eye and pointing the bottle towards my exposed foot.
"It does scream springtime," I held up the blue and waged between the two different shades. This was why I never went out for pedicures. It was too hard to make a decision. Shrugging my shoulders, I placed the peach polish on the tray beside me.
"Which one are you going for?"
Lannie, the daughter of Nannie (the Nazi of all nail salons), held out a berry pink Essie bottle.
"Thought I'd go with Jam & Jelly. Figured it would go well with my soon-to-be tan."
"Are you really going for a fake tan after this?" I groaned, hitting my head against the back of my chair.
"No move!" Nannie barked, pulling my foot closer to her and scrubbing extra hard with her buffer.
It wasn't hard to miss the low snickering of Lannie and my own mother beside me, earning an annoyed glare from myself.
"Yes - I am," sputtered mom in between childish giggles. "Are you sure you don't want to try it too? It'll look lovely with the peach polish."
"I am very, very sure. I'm going out with Niall tomorrow night. The last thing I need is to look like I just stepped out of an Oompa Loompa convention."
"Suit yourself then. That reminds me, when do I get to meet mystery boyfriend," asked mom, her lips curling into an excited grin. "I still can't believe that you two have been together for two months now and I am yet to meet him. This breaks all those mother-daughter rules we established."
"Funny how those rules only come into play when I do something to break them... yet I don't even remember making them with you," I point out.
"That's because you were two. You were also very adamant on your boyfriend being Mr. Rogers. I think his sweaters really did it for your toddler heart."
"Well sweaters are very cozy," I replied.
I held my breath as Nannie began to buff away the dead skin at the bottom of my foot. Unfortunately my feet are incredibly ticklish making this part of the pedicure process hell on earth. With every muscle in my body, I tried my damnedest to not move. Holding in my breath and gripping the edge of my chair were the only two things I focused on.
Once she finished with my feet, I released the breath I was holding. "In," Nannie ordered pointing at the water to wash my feet from any access dry skin. I didn't think twice before plunging my feet into the water as she continued on with my left foot. "This colour?"
"Yes."
She nodded and put my now dry left foot on her bench. As she began to paint my toe nails with a base coat, I refocused my attention back on my mom.
"You can meet him soon, I promise. He's playing a set at the university festival but maybe next weekend if he's up to it."
"He better be up to it," she scoffed. "Your dad will back in Oregon this weekend too. He went to Hong Kong for some conference. We can have both of them over at the house... maybe have a barbecue. It's supposed to be nice next Saturday. Do you think that'll work?"
I paused before answering. It was still surreal to think that my father was no longer living at my childhood home. Once they had announced their separation, Dad moved out and into two bedroom home in the city. As nice as it was to have a parent closer to where I lived, it was still strange that they were no longer together. I don't think I will ever get used to it.
"Uh - sure. I think. I'll have to ask Niall," I told her.
"Of course." She smiled warmly and reached out to grab my hand. "You know - you're still terrible at hiding your emotions."
Mom clapped her hands together, her lips curled into a giddy smile as she smiled widely at me. Her bright blue eyes widened just a smidgen. "I can't believe you're bringing a boy home. This hasn't happened since you were in high school... I just hope Niall isn't an asshole too."
Scoffing I shook my head profusely, earning yet another glare from Nannie. Her fingers dug into the side of my foot as she warned me not to move another muscle. "Well - I'll be sure to warn him of my lunatic of a mother."
"As long as you tell him that I've been released under good behaviour, it should be fine," she joked. "I've been meaning to ask you something."
"What's that?"
"How did everything at the doctor go last week? We never talked about it."
If I were to win a gold medal in something, it would be in the sport of avoidance. I was a master of it. Avoidance was what I was good at. I could avoid with the best of them.
It had been a week since I went to the doctor. In the time spent between my trip to the doctors office and now, I had been worrying about the possible outcome of my blood tests.
Dr. Kellen was hard to read. I have known the older man since my childhood, giving me an upper hand in reading his body language. From the way that he studied my charts, to the answers to his questions, he seemed... worried almost.
"Your weight seems to be normal. You've gained a few pounds since you last saw me. But - you're at a healthy weight," he informed me. "Alright - you can take a seat."
I was surprised, to say the least, when I found out that my weight was in fact normal. I felt like I had gained lots since I saw him last, but that wasn't the case at all. I was still sitting at a healthy one hundred and twenty pounds. Yet the way that he watched me carefully and checking my heartbeat, I thought that there was something possibly wrong with me.
"I would like to check your hands and feet next," he held his hand out for me to place my hand in his. He gripped it gently, running the pad of his thumb along my knuckles. He hummed, writing something down. "Alright - lay back. I'd like to check your stomach..."
I was nervous, to say the last, as his hands pushed down on the side of my stomach and along my ribs. He hadn't said anything to confirm my worries and anxieties. Instead, the silence had been filled with a chorus of hmm's and hum's as he continued to write down medical jargon in my file.
A few days later, I had received a phone call from the doctors office asking for me to come in when possible to go over my blood tests. The same unnerving feeling that sat at the bottom of my stomach rose. It was common for the nurse to tell me over the phone if the tests came out fine. If they were, in fact, negative, then it was best to come into the office to discuss the matter further.
Something was wrong.
I didn't know what it could be and I was far from being emotionally prepared to find out what it was.
Instead, I was avoiding him. I had answered the nurse's prying for an available date and time to come in with a series of, "No - sorry, I have exams..." which in fact, was true. However, exam week didn't exactly begin until the week after.
What they didn't know wouldn't kill them. That wasn't saying much for myself though...
"I don't know what to do," I explained this all to my mother. She looked at me with the same worried look that I had expected to receive from her. She opened her mouth to speak but I held up my hand to stop her. "I know what you're going to say."
"And what's that?" She challenged, her eyebrow quirked up.
"That I should go and get it over with. I know but I don't want to... Not yet. I can't..." Admitting that I was scared over something as trivial as a doctors office was embarrassing.
"Sweetie, it will be fine. I'm sure it's nothing serious," she cooed, placing a hand reassuringly on my hand. "I can come with you if you like? Or maybe ask Niall?"
I shook my head quickly, "No. Definitely not."
"Why?"
"I don't want to drag Niall into something that is probably nothing serious. I can't - no, I can't do that."
"Oh sweetie," she squeezed my hand, shooting me a sympathetic smile. "Niall isn't some random guy. He's your boyfriend... I'm sure he will want to walk with you in this... whatever it is. Let him be there for you."
I shook my head defiantly. "I can't do that."
"It's up to you sweetie. But promise me, please, that you'll go soon. Okay?"
"Sure..." I nodded in hopes that this conversation would end and we could refocus our attention on important matters, like how great my toes looked. Peach was definitely my colour.
-
Every year at the end of the spring semester, the music department at PSU through a spring festival. It wasn't Coachella or Woodstock, but it was a great way for independent artists to get their music out there.
It was open to students as well as anyone in the city. When I had caught wind that it was open to anyone that was interested, I quickly told Niall about it. His interest had been peaked right away and was buzzing with excitement.
"This is a sick opportunity, Jones! I heard reps from record labels show up to these things..." After his original opportunity with a local recording label fell through, Niall had become determined to find another one. I only hoped that this would be his next big break.
Niall was beyond talented and his music deserved to be heard. This could be his big break. That fact alone brought an overflow of excitement throughout my body.
Soon enough, Saturday rolled on in - the day of the festival. Niall managed to receive a decent time slot; four-thirty in the afternoon. It was only two twenty-five now. I was standing in front of my bathroom mirror doing the last finishing touches on my makeup.
"Are you ready babe?" Niall stood at the bathroom door, his hip leaning against the threshold.
"One second," I ran a tinted lip balm along my lips and ruffled my hair. "Alright then. Let's go." Giving him my best smile, I laced my fingers with his.
We walked towards the front door of my apartment. My sandals squeaking against the floorboards. "Is this okay?" I asked him, motioning to my baby pink day dress.
After the festival, an after party for all of the musicians and bands was going to be held at a nearby restaurant. According to my diligent internet searching skills, I was able to dig up some information on where it was being held. Apparently the building used to be an old bank back in the late 1800's. It had a brick exterior as well as interior. Wood planks lined the ceiling and tables were stretched out all throughout the main room. It was mostly used for weddings and functions, but was opened to the public as a small cafe during weekend mornings.
"You look beautiful," Niall reassures me, leaning in to leave a gentle kiss on my temple. I looked down bashfully, hoping to shield the flush on my cheeks.
His fingers let go of my hand to pick up his shoes from the floor. He sat on the bench under my coat hanger, a home addition I had purchased a two weeks prior, and attempted the daunting task of unlacing his sneakers.
I took this as my opportunity to give him a once over. He went earlier in the day to get his hair cut. I loved how his darker roots were beginning to grow out, leaving his bleached blond locks quiffed up on the top. He had styled it so that it flopped a bit to the side, but it still looked amazing. His outfit had been kept casual with a dark grey henley and black skinny jeans.
"Stop checking me out," he smirked. He stood up, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me into him. "That's supposed to be my job."
I blushed once again at his cheesy attempt at a pick up line. I shook my head and smiled shyly. "Oh yeah?"
He hummed. "Yeah," his hot breath fanned over my lips. His eyes twinkled- either from the afternoon sun reflecting from my opened window, or the happiness that was radiating off of his person. "I'm going to kiss you now."
"Yeah?" I breathlessly challenged him.
"Yeah," smirking once more, he leaned in fully and brushed his lips against mine. Teasing me.
"Come on now. That's no kiss," I teased, running my hands up and down his arms only to rest them at the base of his neck.
He hummed, amusement flickering behind his eyes. "M'should change that then."
With his thumb, he gently lifted my head up by my chin. His lips spread up into a cheeky smile, his mouth opened every so slightly, he reattached our lips once more. This time prolonging it just a little bit longer.
I sighed into his mouth, relishing in the moment of his chapped lips against me. He smiled, teeth clashing against teeth. Giggles escape me... he chuckles... his lips kiss the corner of my mouth, my nose and then my temple. His arms wrapping tightly around my waist as his fingers dig at the base of my back.
"You're the prettiest girl, Evie Jones. The prettiest girl I've ever seen. M'lucky to have you by my side. Wouldn't change that for the world."
Arms wrapped around him, I bury my head in his neck... sighing in contentment. "You're delusional."
"Maybe. Maybe not."
"I should have you committed."
"I always thought white jackets looked good on me," he quipped in response. I only giggled a little harder, shaking my head against his shoulder.
Not much longer after that, we made our way to the festival. Traffic had been horrendous, people trying their hardest to make it to their favourite acts. We flashed our backstage passes to one of the guards who let Niall and I in.
Someone led us to a back tent. Inside were groups of bean bag chairs all along the grassy ground. Coolers were sat in the corner where a chalkboard sign leaned against it with the words COLD BEVERAGES free for artists and guests written across. A group of guys were sat on one end. They were busy rehearsing a few of their songs as one guy played the ukulele and an another played a box drum.
Niall squeezed my hand, shooting me an excited grin, "This is ace! Aye Jones, you, my girl, are the best of the best. I can't believe I'm doing this. This could be me shot, y'know? A great craic."
I smiled, giggling along with his excitement. I always loved watching him, even though I sometimes didn't understand half the things he would say. I always teased him, or "taking the piss" as he'd refer to it as, whenever he'd melt into full Irish mode. I would be lying if I didn't find it mildly arousing.
"Let's go and explore. Maybe catch a show or two before you go on?"
"Alright," he agreed. "Mate - can I leave my guitar here?"
One of the security guards motioned us over. He took the guitar from Niall's grasp. "I'll put it in your locker. Niall, right?"
"That's me, yeah."
"Be sure to be back half hour before you go on." Niall and assured him that we would and took a gander around festival grounds.
The campus was packed with people. I didn't even realize the park square was large enough to house these many people and tents. It felt over crowded. But with Niall's hand firmly gripping my own, we made our way through the crowds of people.
On the main (and only) stage, a three piece girl band were singing along to some folk cover. I tapped my foot along to the music, amazed by their voices. Too caught up in the song, I hadn't noticed the body that hand lunged against me and nearly knocking me over.
"What the hell," I squawked, my balance being caught by Niall's firm hold on me. I heard a low giggle sound behind me and a flash of familiar lilac hair. "Dallas."
"Hey you," she wrapped me in a one arm hug. "I was hoping I'd run into you. I heard your boy was playing today."
Niall turn around, glancing over at Dallas and then me. "Hello to you too, Dallas."
"Niall," she greeted in return. "Are you two going to the after party later?"
"Yeah. We were planning on going. Are you?"
She nodded. "I scored myself an invite. I'm writing a review piece for the paper and hopefully Ryder will accept it and let me on staff. The music reporter-"
"Lydia-"
"Yeah! She's graduating this year and they're looking for someone to take her place. I've been on Ryder's case to get on staff for a year now but there's never been any opening slots," she explained.
"I thought you wanted to do fashion journalism?"
"I do - but that spot is already taken. I'll settle for anything right now. I need to get experience for my resume. If I want magazines to even consider me after graduation, I need to show them I know what I'm doing."
She was enthusiastic in the way that she spoke. Her usual cool demeanour being replaced with a flurry of quick words and excited hand motions.
"You're a fantastic writer," I told her honestly. "I think you'll do fine. If anything, Ryder and I are good friends. I can put in a good word for you."
Niall's arm stiffened around me. His fingers digging just a bit harder against my hip. I glanced over at him, but his eyes remained focused on the band in front of us. Thinking nothing of it, I returned my gaze on Dallas.
"Really?" She asked, wide and enthused eyes staring back at me.
"Of course - I'll be sure to talk to him when I have the chance."
Giddy and giggly, Dallas pulled me in for another one arm hug. "You're awesome."
After Dallas told us she'd catch us later at the after party, Niall and I made our way back to the tent.
"How are you feeling?" I asked as Niall fastened his guitar around his shoulder. I smiled at the guitar strap, the same one I had given him for Christmas.
"Nervous. Really fucking nervous," he said. His hand shook as he brought it up to his neck, scratching it.
Whenever Niall was about to play, he always got nervous. The anxiety that he tried so hard to fight against always seemed to win. Only once have I experienced Niall go into a full panic attack. It happened just over a month ago. He was playing a gig at Wonder Ballroom for a well known local band. There was a bigger crowd - a size that wasn't unfamiliar for Niall. However, he had put too much pressure on himself, causing his already anxious nerves to peak and sending him into a full on panic.
It was one of the scariest things I ever had to witness. Seeing this guy that I cared so deeply for psych himself and allow his anxiety to take over him, only to run himself into the ground was awful. I never wanted to experience that again.
I knew that kissing was one of his coping mechanisms. It wasn't healthy but I knew that it worked.
Without much thought, I grabbed his cheeks in the palms of my hands and pulled him into my chest. He looked at me, startled, as his guitar slammed against me. I ignored the pain and awkward positioning of our bodies. I kissed him, slowly at first but with as much reassurance as I could muster. I translated all of my courage, encouragement and peace into this kiss. Only with the hopes that he would feel it and let it settle into his bones.
"You've got this baby," I told him... reassuring him... With downcast eyes, he nodded. His teeth bit down on his bottom lip until it turned white. He slowly let go of his lip. The grim line turning up at the sides.
"I do. Don't I," he mused. "Alright, I'm okay. Watch me from the side?"
I kissed his cheek, "Of course. I lo-" the word burns the tip of my tongue. He looks at me expectantly, curious eyes watching... "I'll be there."
-
"Hey- can we get a photo?"
We entered the Phantom, the upscale hall for the after party. A chalkboard wall of polaroid photographs hung on a nearby display, with the words Guestbook labeled in the middle.
"Hey Leah!" I greeted my best friend, not realizing that she would be working tonight's event. "Photographer duty?"
"I am - yeah. It's been fun. Ryder is around here somewhere too." She held her polaroid camera up. "Hey Niall."
" 'Lo Leah." His hand tensed in mine, but he smiled warmly at her.
"S'okay if I get a photo of you two?"
"Sure." I held Niall's hands and turned my head to the side smiling. Someone called Niall's name taking his attention right as Leah took the photo.
"You knob! You weren't looking at the camera, were you?" I accused, smacking his shoulder playfully. Embarrassed, Niall nodded. A sheepish smirk on his lips.
"Maybe..."
"It's okay Eve, it looks cute..." she handed the partially developed photograph to us. I looked at it, smiling at how happy we looked. "You can grab it before you leave."
I thanked her, before handing it back, and watched as she clipped it to a small clothespin along the board. I made sure to tell her to find me once she was off photo duty so we could grab a few drinks.
Glasses filled with liquor of different types were pushed in our way. The server naming off each name. His voice carried loudly over the music that blasted throughout the main room. Niall took a glass of champagne for me and a beer for himself before thanking the bashful server.
Niall's hand remains interlocked with mine, his fingers gripping mine tightly. He's careful as he navigates his way through the hoards of people. I was surprised to see that it was already so crowded. The festival wrapped up not too long ago. Niall's performance was amazing, but not once had I expected anything different. He was born to perform... and a record label rep seemed to have felt the same way.
Tonight we were celebrating. We were celebrating a great show and the meeting he had scheduled for Monday morning with Euphoric Records. It was an independent record label that was slowly making a name for itself in the Portland music scene. This opportunity was incredible and deserved to be celebrated.
We made our way through the groups of people until there was a break. A bench, situated under a hanging of fairy lights, had been unoccupied. We quickly claimed it as our own, taking our seats close beside one another.
I laughed and sipped generously at my champagne. His fingers laced with mine as he brought our interlaced fingers onto his lap. "You played so well tonight, baby," I whispered in his ear. "I'm so proud of you."
His cheeks flushed deeply, his lips quirked into a smirk. "It's because I had me good luck charm," he replied, his husky voice sending a shiver down my spine.
"I do what I can," shrugging I replied.
He glanced at me, but his attention was soon taken by the bubbly brunette I had seemed to have forgotten about.
"Niall - Evie! I didn't know you two were going to be here." Ginny's bubbly voice broke through the loud music, shooting an uncomfortable shudder through me. Niall didn't seem to notice. Instead, his hand left mine as he stood up to engulf her in a friendly embrace.
I couldn't stop the same jealous feeling and apathy surge into my veins. I sat motionless as I watched my boyfriends once fling cling her hands to his back as he held her into a prolonged embrace.
"I'm sorry I missed your show. I know I said I was going to be there, but traffic was atrocious. I ended up coming straight here," said Ginny. Her bubbly voice altering to apologetic.
"S'alright Gin. I'm glad you made it to the party though! This is always the best part," he laughed.
She smiled. "We always had fun at these things, didn't we."
I couldn't explain the feeling that was going on inside of my heart. Anger... frustration... hurt... It was a mixture of everything and anything. Ever since we got together and his relationship with Ginny ended, so did all talk about her. I only assumed that they weren't in communication anymore. I was wrong. I was so wrong.
Insecurity was never my friend. It haunted me... laughing in my face like the malicious devil that it was. I ignored his confused stare as I rushed past him. Ignoring his calls as he yelled out my name. I walked and walked until I found a secluded hallway. Fairy lights hung above. The brick walls were cold against my bare skin.
I bit my lip until I was sure it was bleeding, hoping that the tears that fought desperately to be released would be swallowed up instead.
The squeaking sound of his sneakers didn't surprise me. I knew he was following me. He always would... even when I hoped that he wouldn't.
"What's the matter?" He asked me, his footsteps tentative as he makes his way slowly towards me. With each step that me made in my direction, I felt my body tense up. I folded my arms against my chest - a defence response.
"You - why didn't you tell me you were still talking to Ginny?" The words broke as they slipped out. The quiver in my voice no longer relenting.
"I didn't know that it was a big deal."
"She's your ex...whatever... your ex-girlfriend? Ex-fling? Hook-up? God..." Each word choked out of me, tears threatening to pool over. "And she's beautiful. She's so beautiful, Niall. Every time I look at her I wonder why you aren't with her instead."
Niall's warm hands wrapped around my wrists as he pulled my folded arms gently apart. "You know you're talking crazy right now, right?"
I avoided his gaze. "You know I'm right," I deadpanned.
"No. I know you're ridiculous," he retorted with a short chuckle. "Ginny and I have been friends for ages. She's one of my best mates, but you -" he brought his hand to my cheeks, thumbs wiping away fallen tears. "I mean - I don't like you hanging out with Ryder..."
I snapped my head forward. Narrowing my eyes, I looked him over. "What?"
He sighed. "I know that you two went on a few dates. I'm not a fan of the guy... Harry's told me some things about him... but I trust you. I know that you're not going to do anything because you're mine."
"I'm not some piece of property, Horan," I retorted grimly.
"I know that, but you're my girl. I only want you, Evie. Just like how I know you only want me. I don't want Ginny or any other girl for that matter. You should know this by now. I thought I made that very, very clear."
"I don't know why," I mumbled, returning my gaze back down to my feet.
"Because I love you," breathlessly he replied. The words flowing out of his lips as if it were a natural thing to say.
I moved my head back up, looking at him like he was insane. "What-"
"I love you, Jones. I think I've loved you for a while now... been waitin' for the right time to tell you, but I guess this is as good a time as any," he went on.
"You love me," I stated slowly.
Niall nodded, laughing quietly. His lips pulled up into a big smile, "Very much. I don't expect you to say it back or anything, but I wanted you to know how I felt."
He loved me... he loved me... he loved me... I repeated it over and over again until it slowly sounded crazy. Niall was in love with me. I've known of my deepening feelings that I have for Niall for a while now. It had become a back and forth debate on whether or not it was too soon to say those three words. I love you... I once read that love does not have a time limit. You can fall in love with someone at first glance, or you can fall in love with them after five months of dating. We had only been dating for two months now... a part of me felt like it was still too soon to say those three words. Those three words that were constantly being taken for granted. Those three words that people threw around over and over again until it slowly lost it's original meaning.
But that didn't deter from the fact that my heart knew how it felt. This was the man that I trusted. I gave every inch of my soul to Niall. He knew me... he knew my fears... well, most of them at least.
He knew my likes and dislikes. He knew of my ridiculous love of Led Zeppelin and how I was obsessed with green smoothies. He laughed at my jokes and understood my untimely sarcasm.
He was it... I was hooked on this feeling that I felt for Niall and I was damn certain that there was no way I was going to be free from it. I had fallen head first into the deep end and forgot my life jacket at home.
"I think... I think that I... no-" I stopped. Words were hard to formulate. Emotions felt higher than it ever felt before... my heart pounded violently in my chest. I knew how I felt. I knew for so long now... it was only fair that he knew too. "I love you too."
Niall's mouth quirked into the widest of grins. His eyes shining brightly as he looked down at me. "You do?"
"Yeah," I breathlessly responded. "I love you too."
In one swift motion, Niall wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into a bone crushing hug. He lifted me up and twirled me around, until he held me up against the wall. I wrapped my legs around his waist. He kissed every inch of my face, from the top of my forehead to each of my cheeks. I laughed and squealed, unable to hold it in. His kisses were playful, his smile contagious... "Best day of me life."
And it was easy to say that this was on the top of my best day of my life list too. He loved me and I loved him. I don't think life could get any better than this. But, I was always known to be a bit too much of an optimist.
-
VOTE + COMMENT please!
A-N: Oi! This chapter is the longest one yet. Over 5K words. Eeep! It's not edited so please bear that in mind. Let me know your thoughts!
Also - I'm so over Melly drama. I honestly don't think she's right for Niall at all, but he can do whatever he wants. Nevie is where it's at.