Andrew's POV
To say Jem had been a little off this week would be a massive understatement.
He jumped at every little sound; a gun was strapped to his hip even when he was just making dinner, he hasn't slept for more than a few hours in days, and his usual youth pastor patience level was no where to be seen.
I honestly hadn't even seen him all that much these past few days. He used to hang out with Patrick and I every night but now all he does is hole up in his office, coming out just long enough to cook dinner before he's taking a plate back where he came from.
As far as I knew he hasn't uttered a word to anyone these past few days. I don't think he's left the house in a while either.
His hair was uncharacteristically messy, the bags under his eyes were just getting worse by the day, and he's been wearing the same wrinkled clothes since it got this bad.
In the nicest way possible, I could only describe him as an absolute mess but when I asked Barrett about it he only shrugged me off.
"He just gets like this sometimes," he had said with a wave of his hand as he continued to watch whatever show was on TV.
"And as his friend you don't see a problem with it?" I didn't bother trying to keep the frustration out of my voice.
His head whipped around to meet my gaze, a harsh glare painted on his face.
"As his best friend I know getting involved only makes it worse," he seethed out. "Just because you three are playing house together now doesn't give you the right to accuse me of not caring for him."
"You say that but look at him! He's all but manic neither of you are doing anything to help."
"What exactly do you want us to do? We take away his work and he gets anxious, we throw his schedule away and he gets pissed, we try to make him tell us what's wrong and shuts down even more. We help by doing nothing."
"How do you expect him to get better this way? By doing nothing you're encouraging it and allowing him to get worse every time he does it."
Barrett's glare worsens before he shakes his head with a sigh.
"You know what, Mr. Fix-It, you're the one with the degree. If you think you can do so much better than Dev and I, go right ahead. You know where his office is and yet you haven't done anything either so don't try to pin all the blame on us."
He doesn't allow me to say another word before he's marching down the hall. Only seconds later his door is being slammed shut.
Devon had given me a similar speech but he remained calm through all of it.
"We've tried everything we can think of," Devon said with a sigh, looking like he wanted to be anywhere else. "We got him to see a therapist for a while but he plateaued and stopped going. We thought the schedule would help and for a while that worked too but now I wish we had never tried it; one little thing being out of the correct time slot can ruin everything."
"Was he ever diagnosed with anything," I asked hoping it would give me something to start with but Devon shrugged.
"He never told us how his sessions went or what happened during them. We just knew sometimes there were good days and others were bad."
The two of us stood in silence for a while until he cleared his throat and looked down at the ground.
"You think you're going to be able to fix him?"
"I think I'm going to at least try." I watched as he bit his lip, a nervous tick I noticed he had, especially when he was stalling or working up the nerve to say something.
"You need to be careful. I know you have in your mind that Jem is a great person, and he is most of the time, but when you push him too hard, he breaks and never good for anyone. I don't want you to get hurt because you were trying to help him."
"What's the worst he's done to you," I ask even though I don't know if I want this question answered.
"It takes a lot to get him to that point but he's pushed us a few times. A few really bad time he's hit me but as soon as it happened he'd feel like shit and 'our' Jem would come back."
I nod but I still have a hard time seeing Jem really hit anyone.
Patrick's door was the next one I knocked on. I didn't give him a chance to greet me before I was pushing past him and telling him the plan I had.
"You really think that's going to work," he asked skeptically, his eyes casting plenty of doubt.
"We have to try something. Just look at him. He's going to run himself into the ground if something doesn't change."
Patrick only thought it over for a few more seconds before he was agreeing.
With his help the plan was set up quickly and before long the two of us were knocking on Jem's office door together.
A hum came from the other side of the door allowing us entry and what lay on the other side was about what I had expected.
Jem still looked just as bad as he did this morning while papers and plans littered his desk. He didn't even look up to us when the door opened.
My feet shuffled as I got closer to him wile Patrick was still walking in long strides behind me.
Every bit of confidence I had before walking in here was gone in an instant.
"Did you need something," Jem asked after a while of us just standing in his office awkwardly.
His knee bounced up and down while his eyes were glued to the paper in front of him. The pen in his hand was being twirled between his fingers.
"We have something for you," Patrick said.
Jem only hummed, clearly not listening, making Patrick frown.
"So you should come see it," he said louder, still not gaining his attention.
His hand reached for the pen in Jem's hand but I caught his arm before he could take it away, Barrett's angered words replying in my mind.
Forcing him to listen or to participate would only make it worse.
I could feel myself inch closer to the desk until I was all but hovering over him.
"Jem," I all but whisper making Jem hum again. When I don't say anything else Jem finally looks away from the paper.
"What?" His voice cut through the air harshly as a glare formed on his face.
"We have something for you," I repeat. His eyes move to Patrick for the first time before focusing on me again.
"What is it," he asked, skepticism clear in his voice while annoyance covered his face.
"Well it wouldn't be much of a surprise if we just told you," Patrick teased.
"I'm busy."
"It won't take long," I lied quickly, if things go the way I hope, he won't be working for the rest of the night.
Jem looked like he was about to say no again when he looked over to Patrick and then back to me. I knew I was all but begging with my eyes but I couldn't find it in me to care.
"Please, just a few minutes," I lied again.
Jem seemed to buy it though. His frown deepened as a sigh left his mouth but to my surprise he put his pen down.
"Just a few minutes." He stood up with a small groan. A smile covered my face as I led him out of the office.
His skepticism only grew when we inched closer to the back door.
"Where are we going?" Patrick and I were already outside but Jem lingered in the doorway. I watched as he shifted from one foot to the other, his right hand hovering over the gun on his side.
"Just to the lake," Patrick soothed.
Jem hummed as he watched the dark yard, as if he were expecting something to pop out at him.
"Are you going to make us go alone," I asked innocently as I eased farther into the yard.
I barely got a few steps away from the door before Jem was following closely behind me.
The walk to the lake was done in silence. Jem's eyes bounced around constantly but when we step over a small hill he stopped in his tracks at what we had set up.
The sun had set hours ago, making the candle lit area immediately draw his attention. A blanket big enough for all of us sat in the middle of the candles with a few pillows scattered around.
Patrick's phone was playing music softly, almost being drowned out by the sound of the waves crashing against the bank.
He never stopped moving closer to it though.
Jem sat dead center on the blanket as he stared at the water while Patrick and I sat on either side of him.
"Are you hungry? I made us dinner since you didn't eat earlier," Patrick said as he held out a plastic container filled with bacon wrapped chicken and a few sides.
"Maybe later," was all he said as he leaned back against the blanket, his head resting on his hands. "So what exactly was the plan here?" The annoyance in his voice was gone now but it was still obvious that he didn't want to be out here.
"You've been tense," Patrick said after a while. "We wanted to help."
Jem only hummed, his eyes focusing on the sky.
"So Barrett and Dev didn't set you up to it," he asked, his voice was tight as is he were expecting us to say yes and wasn't happy about it.
"No they didn't. Barrett actually tried to talk me out of it," I admit. Surprise flashes over him before he covered it up again.
"You two were worried about me? How sweet," he teased but the usual smirk that came with the voice was missing.
"Of course we were you dumbass," Patrick said with a scoff. "You haven't exactly been acting very Jem like. It's concerning."
"Stress is a bitch," Jem sighed.
"Do you want to talk about it," I find myself asking even though Barrett warned me that I probably shouldn't.
"It's nothing. Just too much to do and not enough hours in a day." It didn't take a genius to know he was lying and judging by the look Patrick shot me, he picked up on it too.
"If it's nothing then you need to stop acting like a brat," Patrick groaned as he fell back on the blanket too.
"I'm not being a brat," Jem said with a frown. "You're being a brat."
"I'm not the one not taking care of themself and making my friends worry."
A small glare covered Jem's face but he didn't say anything back. Patrick smirked at that, continuing his gloating, he mumbled another 'brat'.
"If you keep calling me that I'll show you what it really means to be a brat," Jem said, his voice lacking the usual teasing it always seems to have.
Patrick's face turned red and he didn't say another word.
"Lay down," Jem said after a while. "You're making me nervous." A small smile covers my face as slowly eased down to lay on his chest. When he doesn't make me move my fingers began tracing the wrinkles on his shirt.
"It comes in waves," Jem said after while. As time went on it took more effort for him to keep his eyes open, sleep clearly nagging at him. "Something will happen and I'll just get really anxious for a while. Then I'll wake up one day like it never happened. Keeping myself distracted it the best way to calm it down. Don't bother worrying about it, it will be over soon."
I wanted to argue but Patrick easing closer to Jem's side made the words die in my throat. I watched as he laid his head on Jem's arm. Their sides brushed together with every breath they took while a smile took over Jem's face, his eyes still closed.
The night air was cold but that didn't stop Jem from dozing. A breath I didn't realize I was holding escaped me. The plan worked.
I figured if we could just get him away from work for a few minutes that he was crash. I'm just glad I was right.
"I think we should get him inside before he catches a cold."
Patrick didn't wait for me to answer before he was picking Jem up, his arms hooking around his knees while the other hand braced his back. Jem didn't stir and Patrick's arms didn't strain as he held Jem closely as I blew out all the candles and grabbing up all the pillows and the blanket.
The walk back to the house was shorter than the walk down had been.
I dropped the blanket and pillows off in my room before opening Jem's door for Patrick.
It was cute to watch Patrick attempt to lay Jem on the bed. Jem's hands curled in Patrick's shirt the second his back hit the bed. Patrick made a poor attempt to pry them off before Jem pulled him into the bed harshly.
Jem's head rested on Patrick's chest, his hands still clinging to Patrick's shirt.
"What was that you were saying about Jem not being a cuddler," Patrick teased as he motioned me over.
I only rolled my eyes before sneaking in behind Jem, taking my usual place as the big spoon. Jem mumbled something I couldn't quite hear. When no one answered his soft question he asked it again.
"Comfortable?" I smiled into his back as I pulled him impossibly closer.
"Very."
"Good. Don't get used to it." And withoutanother word, he went right back to sleep.
Last updated January 25, 2022