Sierra
"What happened to your neck?" I ask Atlas, noticing a patch of blue. Obviously I know he has some tattoos, but when did he get them filled in...with colour?
Atlas shrugs at the same time as Allie starts to giggle. She shoves a piece of her pancake into Vienna's mouth, then her own. I'm not sure why Allie feels like she has to feed her sister, but I'm not going to complain about it.
I lay a hand on Atlas's shoulder, stroking my thumb over his tattoo. "Dammit, woman. Don't touch me." He flinches, then shakes his body as if to shake off the cold from my hands.
He comes off a little harsh, which isn't unusual for Atlas. Though, it appears the people next to our table don't like the way he's talking to me. Good for them, I do like it. Perhaps that is because I know Atlas always talks rather harshly.
Even his daughters know he doesn't mean any harm. Not to us anyway.
Anyway, Atlas telling me not to touch him only makes me want to touch him even more. Sure, if we were talking about him having any other reason but my cold hands, I would remove them from his body instantly, but...you know, I love annoying this man.
"Did Allie draw them in?" Not that I need an answer because she most definitely did. And he didn't take a shower to get it off before we got here. That's kind of...adorable.
I slide my hand down his arm, carefully tug his too-fancy-for-breakfast shirt out of his pants and slip a hand underneath, pressing my cold fingers right against his hot stomach.
Atlas gasps, pulling my hand out from underneath his shirt. "I swear, Sierra..."
He doesn't get to finish his sentence as the woman next to us walks up to our table. Allie seems unfazed, shoving more food into her mouth as the black-haired woman stares at Atlas with a mad look. Vienna slides closer to her sister, hiding.
It's quite funny to see the differences between both of my daughters.
Allie is a hell of a lot like Atlas. She fears almost to nothing, except from the dark and being alone. She has a big mouth, talks back, even at the age of three. She is loud and unshakable. Vienna, on the contrary, she's quiet. She'd rather disappear in the background than be the center of attention. She hated her second birthday so much, simply because a lot of people showed up and everyone wanted to talk to her.
Allie loves the attention. She loves being put first, and she loves giving orders. Vienna sometimes seems too shy to even ask for food when she's hungry.
"Miss, is your boyfriend abusing you?"
My mouth falls open. I need a whole minute to gather my thoughts before I manage to even remotely wrap my head around her words. Why would she think Atlas is abusing me from...what? seeing me annoy him with my cold hands?
"I'm sorry, why would you think that?" I lie a hand on Atlas's thigh, feeling him relax instantly. He may not show it to other people, but he's actually overthinking things a lot. He cares so much, strangers would never know how badly he wants everything for his family to be perfect.
I get it, though. I was in the position of these strangers before. I thought Atlas was cold. That he hated everyone and everything. That he is mean, rude and unapproachable.
Maybe he is. Maybe he is rude and unapproachable. Maybe he does hate everyone and everything. But he is also the sweetest person one could ever get to know. He does everything for me when I ask him to. Even when I don't ask, he does.
Atlas always makes sure I'm not missing anything. And he makes sure neither are his children missing just one tiny thing. He loves with his whole heart and, yes, he does talk a little bit harsher than normal people, but when did the way someone speaks define their whole...being?
"Mommy, what does 'abusing' mean?" Allie asks, slurping on her milkshake.
I don't answer her, she'll have forgotten it in less than thirty seconds anyway. Surely, when Allie and Vienna are old enough, I plan on telling them what happened to me, just so they know and...I don't know, hopefully learn not to do what I did. I will not tell them it was their uncle who did this to me, but that's also not too important to me anyway.
Just, when they're both a little older, I want them to know when it's better to leave someone before something really bad happens.
But now is not the time for that talk.
"If you need help getting away, I'm sure all of the women in here would help you out."
I blink at the woman, almost bursting into a ridiculously loud laughter. "I can promise you, he is not abusing me. In any way."
"He seems a bit brutal. Are you sure you're alright?"
As much as I appreciate the concern, when did Atlas give her one reason to walk up to us, asking me if he's abusing me?
How are cold fingers and me literally making him gasps with them a sign of me getting abused?
"I'm just saying, darling, you don't have to stay in an abusing relationship with your boyfriend."
Allie looks up at the woman, standing up on her seat. Atlas instantly reaches over the table, holding Allie steady. She takes a deep breath, ready to speak when the woman does so instead.
"Don't touch the child!" She almost yells at my husband for no goddamn reason.
She tries to reach for Allie, but Allie slaps her hands away. "Lady, go away."
The woman gasps while Atlas and I both start to laugh.
I know, I know. This should be one of the times when Atlas and I should be teaching Allie to be nice to strangers. Or not to speak to a stranger that way. But honestly, why would we?
Why should I tell my daughter to be nice when this woman walks up to us, assuming Atlas is abusing his own family? He really isn't. If anything, he's the reason I'm still alive with a house to live in, food to eat and everything.
Okay, maybe I did almost die because of him...but let's not talk about that anymore. It had a whole different reason as well.
"You are abusing my daddy right now!" Not really, but I'll let it slide.
"You're the father." She points at Atlas. "Oh, god, Miss...did he...?"
I roll my eyes. "He is my husband. Yes, he's the father of both of them. And, again, no, he is not abusing me. Nor is he abusing our children. Why the hell would you say that?" In front of a two and three-year-old.
At that, a man, slightly taller than the woman wraps his arms around her as he approaches us as well. He pulls her aside, apologising for her over and over again. "I'm so sorry, Mr. and Mrs. Storm," he says. The woman's eyes widen drastically.
"Storm?" she makes sure she heard that right.
"Daddy, is that our last name?" Allie asks, Atlas nods, so she turns to the woman again. "Do you know who my daddy is? Because he is working in a huuuuge office and I always go there too. And my auntie Athena will call the other guy that will put you in the prison."
I'm not quite sure where she's getting half of this from, but I mean, she's not too wrong.
"Please don't fire me, Mr. Storm," the man now says, backing off slowly at first. And then he and the black-haired woman are gone.
Atlas shrugs unbothered, then tells Allie to sit back down. She does as he says. "Next time they'll assume I'm abusing you because I look at you." He takes my hand in his and I squeeze it gently, he squeezes my hand back, only for me to squeeze again, and so on.
I think it's thirty minutes later when Atlas walks off to pay for our breakfast while I get Vienna into her jacket. Allie insists on doing it herself.
Atlas comes back and picks Vienna up, carrying her to his car. Allie is walking, as she is all the time. She loves walking, especially on her own. So whenever she gets the chance to walk without being forced to hold the hand of either me or Atlas, she'll gladly take it.
We're seconds away from our car when I hear my name being yelled out. I turn around, wanting to know who's calling me when my eyes meet hers.
I let out an annoyed groan, yet I feel my throat clog up.
I still didn't tell Cody she's alive, haven't had the heart for it yet. Atlas promised he wouldn't say anything, mainly because he thinks it's not his story to tell. He's sorta right.
"Sierra, can we talk?" My not-so-dead mother asks, stopping right in front of me.
Allie tugs on my skirt. "Mommy? Is that the doctor?" It's a miracle she even remembers her. I nod.
Atlas is still holding Vienna, not sitting her down in the car yet, but he also doesn't seem like he wants either Allie or Vienna to hear whatever this woman has to say. I certainly don't. I really don't want to explain to my daughters how their grandma, that's supposed to be dead, is still alive after all.
"I don't see what there is to talk about," I say, opening the car door for Allie to jump in. She does with no hesitation, buckling herself up as well. Atlas puts Vienna inside the car, buckles her up then tells them both to keep themselves occupied for a minute before he closes the door.
"They're really beautiful, Sierra." She looks at my daughters through the window, smiling at them. Under different circumstances, I would have given anything for my mother to meet my children. But I no longer feel that way about her.
"I know. Now, stop looking at them, it's creepy." Atlas wraps an arm around me for support. Support that is very much needed.
I always hated being, well, mean. Especially to my mother. But, honestly, is there anything else I could do?
If the mother you thought died in vain years ago turns out to be alive, should that make me feel relieved? I don't think so.
She could have reached out some time after her supposedly death. She could, no should have explained it to Cody and me. She should have sat us down and tell us why she could no longer be a part of our lives.
Yes, that would have hurt. It would have shattered Cody and me to pieces. But her alternative did the same.
God, she could have at least moved elsewhere. Like...Russia or somewhere like that. Wherever the hell that guy comes from.
She looks down at my body, furrowing her eyebrows as her eyes settle on my stomach. Atlas must notice where her eyes land because he snaps his fingers, making my mother look back up. "Why the hell are you staring at Sierra's stomach?"
It's a great question.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not that insecure, I've never really been. Sure, I've had some insecurities about my body every now and then about certain parts...but I think everyone has those. My stomach was a huge one for a while, but it hasn't been for years.
I have a flat stomach, even so after two pregnancies. There's nothing to be insecure about.
Hell, even if I did have a belly and all the stretch marks in the world, there's no reason to be insecure. Every body is beautiful, nothing to hide. Whoever has something to say against that, well fuck them. They're not worth anyone's time.
"Are you pregnant, Sierra?" My mother asks, ripping me out of my thoughts.
My eyes snap up to hers. I shake my head. I've just recently took a test. Like a couple days ago, right before we went to Vancouver. I could have gotten pregnant that night, but no test could confirm it yet. Nor could her eyes. Doctor or not.
"What is it you want to talk about, Rose?" I ask. I'm sure me calling her by her first name and not "mum" is annoying her to the gods. So be it. This woman isn't my mother.
"I need you to understand why I did what I did."
I shrug. "Send me an e-mail. Or better yet," I say unbothered, "write a letter. One you should have provided for Cody and me years ago. Just so, you know, we knew you weren't dead and just left."
"Did you tell him yet?"
"Yes," I lie. She doesn't need to know he has absolutely no clue she's still alive.
"Does he still look the same?" Not sure why she cares so suddenly. "Is he married?"
Is it wrong to punch a woman for asking questions? Technically, she's dead after all, right?
"Are you guys still close?"
Can she stop asking questions? "Neither of those things concern you, Rose. You left our lives. Whatever happens in them is none of your business. His relationship status, not your concern. My relationship to my brother isn't either. You've died. Cody and my mother is dead. You're a complete stranger and neither of us wants you in our lives."