𝐈 𝐘𝐀𝐖𝐍𝐄𝐃.
it'd been two days since jax and i went on our fake date.
and since jack and i kissed.
neither of us said anything about it, and continued to hang out.
surprisingly, it wasn't that awkward.
mia was looking at herself in the tall mirror in front of my bed.
jack was laying on said bed, scrolling through his phone.
"what are we doing again?" i asked.
"helping me pick what to wear." she said, as if it was obvious.
"for what?" jack asked.
"mateo and i are going on another date. i'm meeting his parents" mia said, smiling.
"aw! you're gonna look so cute." i sat up.
"if i knew what to wear." mia groaned, throwing herself onto the bed.
i joined them, sinking into the softness. i almost fell asleep.
we all began to carefully think to shoot what she could wear.
"what about.. a dress?" jack guessed.
i coughed violently.
"you're gonna get me sick." he jokingly rolled me over.
"good. suffer!" i groaned.
"relax." he said.
i shot up, and then grabbed my arm in pain.
"are you okay?" mia asked.
jack shot a worried look at me, saying nothing.
"do you want a bandaid?" she asked, grabbing one off of my counter.
"what the fuck would i need a bandaid for?" i asked, squeezing my arm.
"it's the only thing i know how to use!" she defended herself.
"jesus." i said, and took a deep breath.
"just sit back down." jack instructed.
"i'm okay." i reassured.
doing my best to continue to be cheerful and optimistic, i smiled brightly.
"how about just a dress?" i suggested.
"that's literally what i said-" jack started.
"-yeah, but it's better when she says it." mia said, and began to look through my closet.
"or we could just go shopping?" i asked.
"the date is in 2 hours. keep up." jack said sarcastically.
"sorry, matchmaker of the century." i put my hands together.
"you better be sorry." he said. "i don't accept your apology."
"i'm so sorry." i said, faking tears.
"answer!" mia called out, snapping us both out of our stupid joke.
"god damn." i said.
"which dress should i choose?" she asked.
she pressed one to her body, and then did the same with the other dress.
"what's the event again?" jack asked.
"why do you only listen to cherry?" she complained.
"because i like her." he said. "the most! i like her the most out of all of you."
mia raised a brow, but said nothing.
"i'm meeting spade's parents." mia repeated.
"ew." jack said, without thinking.
"and you're gonna wear that?" i asked.
"yeah?" mia said. "what's wrong with it? oh my god, tell me now. is it ugly?"
"no." i shrugged. "if you wanna wear it, wear it."
"you're acting like my mom when she tells me not to buy something, and when i say i want it, and then she tells me to get it, and then gets mad at me when i don't want it anymore." mia rambled.
"tell that to your therapist." jack said, bouncing a snowball up and down.
"i did!" mia displayed the dresses again.
i stared hard at the dress options.
"mateo's parents are like, rich people. like, rich people." i thought out loud.
"perfect, so are you. what do i wear?" mia asked again.
"yeah, but he acts rich." i explained. "you have to dress fancy, and shit. they use a million spoons."
"oh god." she grimaced.
jack and i looked through the closet, finding the best thing we could.
a simple, black dress.
"yeah, this is good." mia decided after glancing at the clock that signaled she only had 30'minutes.
"i feel like a fashion designer." jack threw himself back onto the bed.
with a yawn, i joined him.
"sure you are." i encouraged.
"i should pick out your outfits." jack continued.
"god, no."
"but i'm naturally talented!"
"you're like, the opposite."
"okay, but i chose that dress."
"you fucked around in my closet for 10 minutes and just said mhm to every dress i suggested!"
jack's mouth opened slightly, and he went quiet.
i turned around.
mia was standing there, wearing her dress and dangling a purse at her side.
"aw!" i smiled.
"you look pretty!" jack grinned.
"i have a couple minutes until he's here." she glanced at the clock. "the date isn't for a while, though."
"let me take some pictures of you then!" i said, and grabbed her arm.
i dragged them down the stairs.
"why are you so obsessed with taking pictures of everything?" mia asked.
shrugging, i threw open the glass back doors.
rays of the sun flooded my vision, grass swaying through the wind.
despite the fact i was sick, and felt like i was constantly tired, i still poured all of my energy into the season i controlled.
the sun continued to shine, no matter my mood.
jack and i searched for a place to take pictures.
a large, tall tree wasn't an option. it was practically dead, on its last limb.
mia posed against a wood fence.
i grinned, the sun laying across her face gently and coating it in soft gold.
she smiled, and i snapped a few photos.
the sky was painted shades of purple and gold, misting into each other to create a color i couldn't describe, i could only see it.
a knock at the door pulled me out of my trance.
with a jump, i bolted to the door to display mia's outfit to spade.
jack flew right after me.
my front door was opened violently, and mateo was wearing a suit.
he carried a bouquet of roses, clutching them and smiling nervously.
"mia is here!" i announced.
"great." he nodded, and gulped.
mia adjusted her purse, and brightly smiled at mateo.
i quickly moved out of the doorway.
mateo's face radiated pure joy as he stared at her with admiration.
there was a silence for a few moments as he breathed in her presence, a stupid smile still covering his features.
jack coughed, making it even more awkward. although, he had been trying to do the opposite.
"are you ready to go?" mateo asked, no longer distracted.
"yeah." mia said, taking his hand and walking out of the house.
"good luck!" i shouted to her.
jack closed the door behind them.
i glanced out at the glass doors, something almost pulling me in.
he followed me out into the yard.
with a sigh, i let my body fall onto the soft grass.
jack joined me, laying right beside my body.
neither of us said anything. as we stared at the sky, i let my body drift away.
it felt like i was disappearing, melting away from thoughts.
and i didn't fight it.
the sun was lowering into the depths, and tiny stars were twinkling, barely visible.
soon, it would take me with it.
i'd be another petal flying in the wind without a second thought or even a second glance.
jack deserves to forget.
because he deserved to finally be at peace.
i know one day i'll die again and be revived. and then he'll forget about me.
this searching, this treasure hunt will begin again.
i will return to looking for an empty feeling for the next 300 years.
we were cursed.
destined to constantly lose and find each other again.
i had to go through pain to feel love.
i had to search desperately.
jack's face turned to look at mine. his eyes softened. i was surrounded by a cold mist.
maybe one day i won't be here to tell jack that i can see him. and he won't be able to see me.
one day he'll forget.
"i love you." i told him.
i burned myself into his memory with my heart, and he accepted it.
"i love you too." he answered.
i would love him until the end of time.
when the world is destroyed, all that will remain is a tiny piece of my heart that belongs to him.
i created love for him.
never will i know how it feels to someone else.
but i know how it does with him.
two complete opposites, we fell in love regardless.
"i love you so much." he told me. "i love you how you love me."
he took my hand in his.
our two fragile souls were bonded together for eternity.
"do you wanna be my girlfriend?" he asked after a while.
"yeah." i said softly.
the hues mixing in the sky held me together.
soft oranges and pastel pinks molding, becoming one, setting downwards towards the center of the earth.
it set, being pulled into the ground.
the sky turned black, stars lining up to present themselves and decorate my vision.
and somehow, they began to resemble me more and more.
jack and i needed each other to go from summer to fall.
one day i would be gone.
all the time it took me to find him will be useless and a waste.
he fell in love with the tragedy of my loneliness.
i will be gone.
one day.
but that doesn't mean i can't love him now.