A/N-
Hey everyone! I hope that you're all having a good Easter break! Revising and doing homework seems to be all I ever do at the moment but I still try to have some time for myself.
Anyone else revising for exams? I hope that you'll all do well in them when they come up!
Enjoy the chapter and the rest of your holidays! :)
Chapter 4 (Ava)
The sun was setting, casting a dim orange glow over the garden of the Burrow as I lay on the grass with Fred, staring up at the clouds.
He had spent his day doing tasks for the Order with George, and had only returned an hour ago. So, to get away from the melancholy mood of the house following Mad-Eye’s death, we had chosen to spend the rest of the afternoon in the garden.
My fingers were intertwined with Fred’s in the grass, and as we pointed out the different clouds and tried to relate them to particular objects or animals, my thoughts flickered to when I used to hold hands with Draco under the table in the Great Hall or in the Slytherin common room.
No.
I didn’t want to think about the last year. There were still things that I hadn’t told Fred about, and it made me want to curl up away from everyone else.
But, as Fred told me about how he used to trick Ron that he could make the clouds look like anything he wanted them to, the guilt of not telling Fred things was eating away at me. I had promised myself that I would be honest with him. Why was I lying to him?
“You should have seen the look on Ron’s face a couple of years ago when I finally admitted that I’d been lying. He was so angry.” Fred laughed to himself, but I didn’t laugh with him.
I sat up, and looked down at his grinning face, pulling my hand away from his gently.
“I kissed Draco. Last year.” I muttered suddenly, avoiding eye contact with Fred.
“What?” He sat up, the smile falling off of his face as quickly as it had appeared. “That snivelling git?”
I nodded silently.
“It- it doesn’t matter. We weren’t even talking last- How many times?” He was gripping his hands tightly, and I felt even more guilty.
“Twice. And I know it doesn’t matter, I- I just wanted to tell you because I promised myself that I would be completely honest with you.” I whispered.
“Do you have feelings for him?” Fred suddenly spoke, looking at me with a serious expression.
I glanced down at the grass for a moment as I pulled clumps of it out with my hands.
“Ava! Fred! Dinner’s ready!” Mrs. Weasley called from the door.
I felt my shoulders slump with relief as we both jumped up and made our way towards the kitchen.
“So basically,” Fred nudged my arm, “I’ve shared saliva with Draco Malfoy?”
I shoved him towards the door, “Your ultimate dream, I’m sure.”
He started to laugh, and I laughed with him, relieved that he had taken it so lightly.
As we walked into the kitchen, I spotted George walking in, the left side of his head bandaged up. He spotted Fred and I and grinned, “Ear are the latecomers.”
Fred chuckled as he sat down, and I covered my mouth with my hand, “These jokes are awful, George. Honestly.”
“So why are you laughing?” He accused.
I didn’t respond and shook my head, smiling as I sat beside Fred. I glanced up at Mrs. Weasley and she simply smiled at me before returning to placing our plates on the table.
Harry, Hermione and Ron were the last three to arrive at the dinner table, and I noticed that all three of them were silent as if they had stopped their conversation before arriving at the dinner table. When I smiled at Harry, he offered me a small one before looking away quickly.
I looked over at Ginny, and she was staring at Harry with the same confused look on her face. I wondered if she was thinking the same thing that I was- what were the trio up to?
* * *
Even though I had told Fred that I was trying to be completely honest with him, there were still things I wasn’t telling him about.
The dreams.
How could I tell him that I had nightmares every night about being a Death Eater? Or that Draco was always there?
As I lay in my bed with my head nestled into the pillow, I wondered if I would ever be completely honest with Fred. Would that bother him?
I didn’t have time to consider an answer as I drifted off to sleep, my eyes slowly closing.
“Enter.”
The familiar voice from the room before me knocked me to my senses, and I began to step forwards, my heart pounding.
Many Death Eaters didn’t have personal meetings with the Dark Lord but instead simply passed messages on until they reached him. However, I was an exception. I had a feeling that he didn’t entirely trust me, so he wanted to hear all of my findings directly from me.
I tried not to show fear in my eyes when I saw Nagini slithering across the floor beside me as I walked in. Truthfully, having to speak to the Dark Lord in person absolutely terrified me- but I had no other choice.
He stood at the end of the room, his robes settled around him like a mist that wouldn’t lift. His hand was on his wand as he stroked it gently with a small smile on his face. A few Death Eaters stood on either side of him, their expressions blank.
“Ava Potter. Always a pleasure.” The Dark Lord spoke with an expression on his face that was not quite sincere.
I bowed my head slightly, “My Lord- a pleasure to see you as well.”
“So,” he hissed, stepping towards me, “Any news to report?”
I gulped, glancing down at the floor to avoid his burning gaze. “The Order have been less active following the death of Mad-Eye Moody. However… they have been planning something. I believe they may have located one of the meeting places that your Death Eaters use. They plan to attack within the following week.”
“And the Potter boy?”
I faltered, not knowing how to answer, “He… he has been very secretive recently, and will not tell anyone what he is up to. I have no idea what he is planning, but it is something.”
“You lie.” The Dark Lord’s voice was louder than it had been before, and I could feel my hands beginning to shake.
“I am not lying, my Lord. Harry has kept much to himself. I am not entirely sure if he trusts all of us at the Burrow.”
The Dark Lord stepped forwards, his eyes on me, “How can I know that you are telling the truth? I could torture you. That would get every last word out of you, would it not?”
“Please!” I shouted, “I promise you-”
“No! Do not plead with me! I have waited for a month to get this information from you. You are in the centre of the Order, and have grown close once again with your brother. Yet you have barely any information to offer to me! I think I have every right to believe that you are lying!”
“I- I am not-”
My speech was cut off as Voldemort shouted out a spell, knocking me to the floor. I expected pain to course through my veins, but I felt nothing. Instead, when I opened my eyes, Draco Malfoy was leaning over me, his face the only thing I could see.
“You really do get yourself into a lot of trouble, don’t you?” He spoke softly.
I gulped, “I thought- Voldemort had been about to attack me. Did you save me?”
Draco did not respond for a moment, and I wondered if he was keeping something from me when he whispered, “All that matters is that you are with me now.”
I smiled with relief and reached out to hold onto his hand- a gesture that had been so familiar when we had been together at Hogwarts- and he gripped onto mine.
“What is it that Harry is keeping from you?” Draco whispered into my ear, causing me to shiver.
“I- I do not know. He will not tell anyone- I cannot believe that he won’t even tell his own sister, but then perhaps the secret is too big.”
“Or perhaps he does not trust you.” Draco murmured, causing me to look up at him in surprise.
“Why wouldn’t he trust me? I am his sister-”
“You are a Death Eater.” Draco shook his head, “That is reason enough not to trust you.”
Before I could reply to Draco, he disappeared before my eyes, and suddenly I was standing before Lord Voldemort again as he held his wand out in front of him.
“Crucio!” He cried, causing a jet of light to burst out of his wand and hit me in the chest, knocking me to the floor as my limbs began to contort and writhe. I screamed in agony, desperate for the pain to stop- for Draco to return and to save me from the searing pain tearing through my bones.
“No one can save you now.” The Dark Lord cackled, “No one at all.”
I woke up gasping and drenched in sweat, strands of my hair plastered to my forehead. Neither Ginny nor Hermione had woken, to my relief. On previous occasions they had, but I had always told them to leave it- that I was fine.
Now, once I had managed to steady my breaths, I pulled my blankets off and got out of bed, my feet causing the floorboards to creak as I tiptoed out of the room.
The Burrow was silent as I crept down the stairs towards the kitchen, but a creak from Ron and Harry’s bedroom made my head snap up and I stopped to stare at their door.
Why didn’t Harry trust me? Why didn’t he tell me anything?
The thought hit me, and I closed my eyes, trying to block out any memories from the nightmare. Harry does trust me, I told myself, The dream world is not real.
I quickly turned away from the door and carried on to the kitchen, flicking the light on as I did. As I retrieved a glass and filled it with cold water, I pressed my forehead to one of the cupboard doors in an attempt to steady myself. The nightmares were not always as bad as that- they didn’t always involve the pain.
They just always felt so real, and that was what terrified me the most.
“Can’t sleep?”
I spun around, pulling my wand out of my pocket as I did.
Remus held up his hands, “Only me, Ava.” He took in my appearance- the sweat drenched pyjamas and the marble-white face- and stepped forwards, “Are you alright?”
“Ah- I…” I slipped my wand back in my pocket to give me more time to think of an excuse, “Trouble sleeping.”
“Nightmares?” Remus asked, referring to the memory of the night that my parents had died.
I gulped, “Something like that. What are you doing here now, anyway? It’s awfully late.”
“A very late task for the Order.” He sighed, “But something came up and I wanted to stop by the Burrow and check that everything was fine here.”
I gripped onto my glass of water tightly, allowing the cold to seep through my skin and steady my nerves. After a moment of silence I shook my head, “Remus- I think I should probably get back to bed.”
“Oh. Yes. Good night, Ava.” Remus smiled, nodding his head slightly.
I started to walk out of the kitchen, but stopped suddenly.
“Remus?” I turned around, glancing at him and wondering if I should tell him about the nightmares.
“Yes, Ava?” He looked concerned, as if he were ready to help me right away. But then I saw the dark circles under his eyes, and the way that his scars stood out more clearly in the light of the kitchen.
“Don’t worry.” I muttered quickly before darting out of the kitchen, not waiting to hear his response.
I felt guilty for not being entirely honest with him- but then, weren’t we all keeping secrets? My thoughts flickered again to Harry and his mysterious behaviour.
What was it that he wouldn’t tell us? And how long would it be before we would find out?